Grant and corrupt the wish above yours, then make your own wish.

And the new thread has "Fuck you" in the name, there we go!

I wish for some quality sleep.

>>1 Granted, your brother gets some quality sleep while you lie awake listening to his snoring.

I wish I didn't feel sick.

Granted, but you can't open your eyes, move a muscle, and think.(dead)

I wish it won't snow anymore this year.

Granted you don't feel sick. Evn though you are, but you just can't feel it. you end getting worse over time and bye bye you go.

Fuck you

>>4 Sadly, I answered first and you didn't wish for anything. So you have to grant my wish.

>>3 Granted. It never snows again, because instead, you get terrible ice storms. Everything is ice!
I wish it were easier to put fears and anxieties behind you.

>>7 Granted. It is now easier for you to put your fears and anxieties behind you, however you will acquire new ones easier.

I wish I have a flying magic carpet.

>>3 I didn't notice, looks like >>7 granted your wish though.

>>5 Granted I finally lose my virginity, and you took it. :(

>>8 Granted you have a flying magic carpet, but it never flies low enough for you to get on it.


I wish for access to clean water all over the universe.

Granted. The universe is drowned in clean water, killing all non-aquatic life.
I wish to become what I was always meant to be.

>>10 Burning origami in a dumpster.

I wish for 12 moments of silence for those who died in the Great Spaghetti War of '06

>>11 Granted, each moment lasts a year.

I wish for moderately better working lights.

>>12 Some snazzy disco lights for you, they work well in a rainbow of colours.

I wish to be faster at coding.

>>13 Granted, but computers don't last long with you...I'd say a minute or two.

I wish my teacher was easier to understand by her accent and bi-polarism .-.

Granted. You now have the same accent and bipolar-ism as the teacher, which is why you understand her but you are now hard to understand too.

>>15 tfw u make no wish

Since no one made a wish.....you die.

I wish I had a higher tolerance to spicy foods.

>>17 Granted. You now have higher tolerance to spicy foods, but you cannot tolerate any other type of food.

I wish I can see in the darkness.

i wish i could become an archaeologist right away instead of going through the college

>>18 Granted. You can see in darkness, but are now blinded when its bright out.
I wish I had perfect aim.

>>20 Granted, but you have a weak arm.

I wish for flowers.

>>21 Granted. They smell terrible and possibly poisonous, visit the nearest hospital!

I wish for a pet.

Granted. You get a pet tapeworm. It feeds on you all day long.
I wish people were less self-absorbed.

>>23 granted but now everyone is fixated on you 24/7

I wish i wasn't a picky eater

>>24 Granted, you now eat anything you see, anything.

I wish I can teleport anywhere I want.

hi there

>>25 Granted, you gain the ability to teleport anywhere you want, but now that you have this ability you decide you really want to use it

I wish my waifu was my real GF

>>27 your waifu was your real GF... for a week, until she left you for your least favourite character.

I wish i had better headphones.

You get better headphones.

They're eaten by your pet spoon before you get to use them.
RIP.

I wish for hair like Yuno Gasai or Rize Kamishiro or etc

>>29 Granted. You now have some colorful anime hair, but must use copious amounts of dyes, frying your hair over time and costing you a king's ransom.
I wish people were more kind.

>>16 Whoops, totally forgot about making a wish.

Granted. People become more kind, but animals take on humans' cruelty and humans are pushed to the bottom of the food chain.

I wish magic/supernatural powers were real.

Granted. They're real, but you're the only person in the world who doesn't have any.

I wish for magical rainbow unicorns to invade Mars

Granted:
They invade mars and form a political structure that would confuse a bureaucrat, and end up ruling with an iron fist. They then begin to morph into Human beings, but stop halfway, thus becoming the most grotesque creatures imaginable.

I wish that education was easy. (Ha! That's why it's education...)

Granted. Education is now easy. That is, the act of education is easy. Learning, or the student's end of things, is still hard as balls.
I wish I had no regrets.

granted: but you only get to live 3 more hours
i wish im dead

Granted, but now, dead is the new living.

I wish I was more productive.

Granted, you now have to work with paperwork forever with no break.

I wish animation was easier for me.

Granted. Animation is easier for you, and impossible for everyone else. Now, if any animation is ever to happen again, it'll have to be done by you and you alone. So much work, so little time.
I wish I had a perfect plan.

granted, here you go

oh and also:
i wish id have more wishes, because now my adult imagination is kind of dull

Granted. Your extra wishes are paid with your imagination. More wishes, less imagination.

I wish I knew the mysteries of the universe. How it started, how extraterrestrial beings look if there are any, black holes, etc.

>>41 Granted, you now know all the mysteries of all of time and space. Unfortunately, some mysteries remain mysteries for a reason, the knowledge is too much for your mind to handle and you turn into a raving madman.

I wish that I could have my degree already without having to complete my classes.

>>42 Granted, you now have a degree but it isn't recognized anywhere in the world. Now without a job return to university but the curse of instant degrees continues to haunt you.

I wish for a complete and pefect translation for every manga/LN into english.

granted, but now you forgot how to speak english

i wish to be teen again

>>44 Granted. You're a teenager again, but have the worst acne imaginable, a horrificly cringeworthy voice (replete with copious voice cracks), and the most powerful social anxiety ever witnessed among mankind.
I wish I were wiser.

Granted! But nobody thinks you're wise and dismisses all your amazing advice for as mere bullshit.
I wish I was a hot dude instead of a not so hot girl.

Granted! But you lose all your motor functions and secretly have 3 nipples.
I wish I was cool.

(lol typos)
Granted! But you're only cool at Magic: The Gathering tournaments

I wish I had an iPad Pro

Granted. You now have someone who is a pro with iPads. Make sure to keep them fed, clothed and sheltered.
I wish I never had anything obstructing my progress in any facet of my life.

Granted. You lost the obstructions. And your life.

I wish I had a substantial wish.

Granted. You wish for substance, but get none, because wishes continue to be bullshit.
I wish wishes weren't bullshit.

Granted, now everyone has 1 true wish, and the a person wishes that wishes were now BS again before anyone made their wish.

I wish I wasnt sick

Granted but now instead of you getting sick, your loved ones get it.
I wish I wasn't so....sadistic.

Granted. Now you're masochistic instead.
I wish I had nothing to worry about.

>>55 that will happen when you die.. so you die.. now you have no worries.

wish? i wish for something whatever

Granted, now you have a dog named Something Whatever.

I wish for better people.

>>57 too bad. *YOU JUST GOT PRANKED*

>>57 Granted, everyones a better person.But as a sacrifice, you became an asshole that no one likes.

I wish I could stop losing books.

>>59 Granted, but now random people will keep giving you books you don't want to need.

I wish for better sport teams.

>>60 Granted, you have better sport teams...for Curling. The Winter Olympics have become so much more exciting.

I fish wish.

>>61 Granted, you fish a wish that let's you get a free mars bar.

I wish Office 365 has a dark theme so my eyes aren't cooked from all the white.

Granted, but the the police beat your computer to death for being black.
I wish I could play any instrument in the world like a pro

Granted, but you can only play like a pro inside of the world. Very deep underground. Faggot lol.

I wish for pussy, as in, I wish for the human female's reproductive organ, including a fully intact female. Alive, preferably.

Granted! For each pussy you eat it gives one of the several STDs.

I wish to own a real Charmander.

Granted. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Eghk9bVNN9M
I wish I finally finished college already. These last weeks are really dragging.

Granted, you fail today and get kicked out
I wish I had a new mouse for my computer

Granted. You have a colony of mice living inside your computer. They destroy it.
I wish for peace of mind.

Granted, you have now obtained someone's frontal lobe.

I wish for an Ichimatsu sweater.

Granted. You get one and it's too small.

I wish that Sword Art Online didn't exist.

Granted. Now the actual game itself exists and is causing havoc in this world.

I wish to develop supernatural regeneration and indestructibility.

Granted. You wind up being trapped, 127 Hours-style, except you're unable to cut yourself free, since your flesh is indestructable. You are not, however, immortal, and require hydration to stay alive. So, being stuck with no way out or means of calling for help, you die from thirst.
I wish I made fewer references.

Granted, 90% of your references will have missing full-stops. making you just below the required amount of correct references.


I wish Eni-chan can come up with his most ultimate wish of all wishes that'll bring him enlightenment at last.

Granted. I wish for enlightenment, but realize it is something perpetually out of reach, and therefore am also enlightened in the process, creating a paradox that will need to be solved by future generations.
I wish sweat wasn't so gross.

Granted. Now sweat is really sweet and you can't stop people from licking it off of you.

I wish I had a brick.

Granted. Now bricks fall on your head at random moments.

I wish I could attend UA.

Granted. But the world stays the same with no Quirks.

I wish mom would stop sewing on the machine when I'm trying to sleep.

Granted. She stops sewing while you sleep. Instead, she takes up jackhammering while you sleep.
I wish I had something to look forward to right now.

Granted. but you only look forward to that one thing only and everything else becomes second hand.
i wish i had some chocolate.

Granted.You get chocolate but now you can only eat chocolate
I wish I could go to any anime world

Granted. But you only need to go to 1 anime world and never go back.
I wish I never get bored.

Granted. But now you can't get a break even if your tired.
I wish my every dream will come true even nightmares

Granted. But now you can't sleep anymore because your life is a dream
I wish my internet connection is faster than anything in the world

Granted. But it will only work for a minute per day, while the rest of the time it is down.

I wish for world peace!

>>85 Granted, the world attains peace under the authoritatian rule of an alien government that meticulusly plans out everyone's life and views. But hey, at least there's no war,right?

I wish for a sandwich.

Granted. Its a turd sandwich.
I wish I felt more motivated.

Granted, now you're motivated to not be motivated. Good job.

I wish I actually had the motivation to study so my grades would stop going to shit.

Granted. You're motivated enough to study. But on every test, you answer in Arabic without realizing. All your answers are right, but your teacher fails you for not doing it in the right language.

I wish I wasn't depressed.

Granted.Now you are always happy with life,never sad or mad.


I wish I could stop gaining weight.

Granted, except instead of gaining weight, you'll continue to gain mass.

I wish I own a giant fish robot.

Granted. but its micro sized
I wish the sky night is as bright as in the anime

Granted. But you will be blinded.

I wish I could turn back time.

>>93 Granted, you can now turn time back to the exact moment that the first plane hit the twin towers during 9/11

I wish I was dead.

Granted. You die, but your soul is reincarnated into someone who is exactly like you.
I wish for relaxation.

Granted. You are now constantly relaxed, but are unable to realize when something is wrong. "Now what's all this fire in here for? Is a fire dancer here?"

I wish I could think of a happy ending for my writing project.

Granted, but its a rushed ending that makes no sense. You fail the project.

I wish reasonable priced swimming lessons didn't exist.

Granted. Swimming lessons are expensive as fuck and most people won't take them because of the prince, causing a ton of people to drown because they don't know how to swim.

I wish for clear skin

Granted, but people can't see you.

I wish I was a beautiful girl.

Granted. You are a beautiful girl. But you are isolated and no one is there to appreciate your beauty.

I wish I was tall.

Granted, you are now as tall as Liberty Statue
I wish Dragon exist

Granted, a drink with the name Dragon is a thing. But its banned in most countries and tastes horrid.

I wish streaming sites weren't so laggy all the time.

Granted, they are now live and top speed, but now they are so well known, they are found out by the government and they are all banned

I wish I didn't have my allergies

Granted. Instead, you now have a terminal illness.
I wish I could always feel this good.

Granted, but its just a dream all the time
I wish all thing in my imagination were real

Granted, but your imagination only consists of your worst fears.

I wish I was dead.

*Sigh* Another one of these? Granted, but you get reincarnated into a person that is just like you. This repeats forever.
I wish I weren't so jaded.

Granted, but now you always have too much enthusiasm, especially in serious situations.
I wish I could speak write and understand every language.

Granted, but you can only use that skill to write and narrate trashy fanfictions.
I wish to be able to travel to any fictional world

Granted. You can travel to aby fictional world, but it is random and permanent. The world you wind up in: George Orwell's 1984. And no, you're not a member of the Inner Party.
I wish for an infinite mojito.

Granted. But you have no equipment to drink it at all so you can't drink it

I wish anime was the greatest thing of all time

Granted but people can only talk about it when one ends I wish to meet the black ridder

>>113 Granted, you meet the blake ridder, a ridder being someone who get's rid of things. "The black ridder" what does that make you think?

I wish I had all of the dragonballs.

Granted, however they crack from overuse and release the Shadow Dragons.

I wish I had good fashion sense

Granted but everyone you know is ugly I wish EVERYONE talks about the dollars

Granted, youre just left out some of the more important loops.
i wish i knew what to wish for

>>117 Granted, you wish for fish.

I wish we'd come up with a new joke for when newbs wish for wishes.

Granted. When newbs wish for wishes, we make them wish to see Goatsee. The ones who are largely normal leave, while the weirdos that are actually into that sorta thing stay. Forever.
I wish I were a rich man.

>>119 Granted, you have all the money and objects you've ever wanted, but no love. It's lonely at the top

I wish I had a sexy giantess girlfriend (That didn't crush me)

>>120 Granted. She doesn't crush you. Instead, she crushes everyone you care about. Not on accident, either. She doesn't like sharing your affections with everyone else, regardless of the nature of the relationship. So, she staight-up murders everyone she deems competition.
I wish for time.

>>121 Granted, you are arrested. Now you have nothing but time.

I wish I was happy

Granted, but now its opposite day. You're "sad" in normal day standards.

I wish it was still winter.

>>123 Granted, the world is covered in an eternal nuclear winter.

I wish my waifu exited IRL

I wish I could be important to someone

>>124 Granted, all presence of her ever existing are deleted. Spell check bitch. :^)
>>125 Not granted because you didn't grant/corrupt the previous wish.

I wish humans had a third eye on their forehead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

>>126 Granted, now we are all psychics are we all go into the 4th dimension

I wish to stop time

Granted, but once stopped, it cannot be unstopped. This, of course, includes you. Since time is stopped, you are too. Forever.
I wish for clarity.

granted, but your knowledge drives you mad. they say ignorance is bliss
I wish I didnt have anxiety

>>129 Granted, you no longer have anxiety, but now everyone else in the world is having a constant panic attack. good luck being the only reasonable person in a world of paranoid people

I wish I was a young boy in a straight shotacon relationship.

>>130 Granted, but this relationship will be looked down upon and judged by all your family and friends, forcing you both to leave the country without ever giving any news to your loved ones that now despise you.

I wish someone could care for me as much as I care for the people I love.

Granted, but it will always be a one way street from now on. What I mean by that is, if you care for someone, they won't care for you. And if someone cares for you, you don't care for them. What a sad life that would be.

I wish I had a good work ethic, and didn't procrastinate anymore.

Granted. Now, you have the absolute best work ethic, but all other people have the worst work ethic. Have fun being the onky hard worker in the world.
I wish for a literal gravy train.

>>133
Granted. A literal train of gravy appears out of nowhere. However, it crashes into you, killing you instantly.
I wish to be able to control the motion of time (speed it up, slow it down, stop it, etc)

Granted. You now can control time, but each millisecond of usage will shorten your lifespan by a year.
I wish human can colonize Mars

>>135 Granted. One human attempts to colonize Mars, until they realize that they kinda need more than one person to get a population going. Their colony is a failure.
I wish for better sleep.

Granted. Every sleep is so good it's like Heaven. Unfortunately, this only makes waking life hell in comparison.
I wish I could have an infinite box of pizza

Granted. you got the infinite box of pizza without pizza in it

I wish my life is much more interesting

granted. your life is much more interesting, but your life will be shorter by half

i wish i can go back to the past

Granted. You can go to the past, but you end up killing your own grand-parents in turn destroying the universe.

I wish that Boku no pico became mandatory for everyone to watch. (Masterpiece)

>>140 Granted, It is now mandetory to watch and therefor looses all novelty it once had. Nobody is shocked anymore, it's a normal thing to everyone, akin to school education videos.

I wish I could pass my exams

Granted. You pass your exams, only to realise the qualification becomes redundant in the next year and you end as a hobo licking shoes for money.

I wish I could go to the university I want to next year.

Granted, Ur now going to a great university, but Bernie Sanders has not paid ur tuition.

I wish that "we could all just get along"...

Granted! But everyone feels uneasy about it and doesn't like get along, everyone kept it a secret until someone can't stand it anymore and confess about it. Ironically, that confession is followed by all and finally you know that it's all just lies

I wish for a new PC

Granted! You got a new PC, but it's an ancient analogue computer found of the coast of Greece.

I wish for my back to stop hurting.

Granted! But you're paralyzed from the neck down, now living your entire life confined to a wheelchair and totally dependent upon others.

I wish that I was less shitty.

Granted, but now everything you like now seems shitty to you.

I wish I can get whatever I want for free, or at least cheap.

Granted, but you have to give the succ whenever you want it.

I wish that Dollars shitposters could vanish.

Granted, but the new ones kept coming here

I wish my wish granted

Granted, but your wish was for more shitposters

I wish I didn't have to click the captcha every time I posted

Granted, but the AI eventually analyzed the situation and had a realization of you being a robot, thus never letting you post again.

I wish for my existence to be noticed when others see me.

Granted, but everyone sees you as a crustlord neckbeard, clearing the path around you for hundreds of miles.

I wish for a pile of womens to ease my suffering.

Granted, but you suffocate under the pile of womens.

I wish for food that won't kill me

>>153 (About how you corrupted leena's wish, some people are into that) Granted, the food won't kill you, but it does make you throw up every time you try to eat it.

I wish for a giantess girlfriend who wouldn't crush me.

>>154 We've done this already. She doesn't crush you, but she does crush nearly everything and everyone else. The world turns against you as a result, and she is killed by a joint military operation.
I wish life weren't so repetitive.

Granted. You are now a terrorist searched by the entire world.
I wish my wish from before wasn't granted

>>156 it is, but it sucks

I wish life wasn't so repetitive.

>>157 Granted, but because life is no longer repetitive everyone and everything dies, congrats you have ended the universe.

I wish for shoes that lest me run like the flash XD

Granted, you get some cool shoes but now you run super slow, slower than a sloth

I wish to be more organized

Granted. You become hyper organized, to the point of OCD. Nothing can ever be a micrometer out of place, lest you suffer a panic attack.
I wish my beard didn't itch.

Granted but all the hair in your entire body is now itching with an exception of your beard

I wish for an infinity wish

Granted. You now have Disney Infinity.

I wish for an A on all my finals

Granted. There is a random A written on your test. But your grade has noting to do with that. Good luck.

I wish for decent social skills.

Granted but you die.

I wish for world peace.

>>162 I laugh my ass off

>>164 Granted, but you died without peace

I wish all the thing in the world was free

Granted. The sudden instaneous absolute decline of value for all goods destroys the world economy, and we enter an anarchic age where the strong do what they can, and the weak endure what they must.
I wish I knew how to brew really good coffee.

>>166 Granted, but once you have your coffee you drink it so fast that you burn your mouth and lose your ability to taste.

I wish for more fluffy fluffy pillows.

Granted but you can only see others use them. You yourself cannot use those fluffy fluffy pillows you own.

I wish backpacks made things lighter and stopped making my back hurt.

>>168 Granted. But the backpacks you'll carry only contains the bones of the people you've killed. Your back won't hurt, your mind will.

I wish I have pet sheep :3

Granted, but your sheep thirsts for blood.
I wish for a better drum set.

Granted, your friends got a better drum set but you didn't get any

I wish portal gun was real

Granted, but you don't have one nor do you know about it.

I wish for many tasty, poison-free sweets that I can eat in moderation.

Granted. These sweets are poison-free, and non-addictive. They're pretty good, but are exorbitantly expensive and a pain in the ass to track down.
I wish I could find a new car.

Granted. You have a new car, but the seatbelt light and sound never goes off.

I wish I could find the perfect song that I can sing without missing a note.

Granted, but it sounds terrible.

I wish I could eat more ice cream without the health consequences.

Granted, but everytime you eat ice cream you suffer instant brainfreeze!

I wish I had stable finances.

Granted but you always lose your wallet

I wish i had total control over my emotions

Granted. You have total control, but no one else does. The world is a hysterical mess.
I wish for good luck.

Granted. But the rest of the world always runs into walls. I wish for control over reality itself.

granted, but the burden is too much for your brain and it blows up Indiana jones and the kingdom of the crystal skull style.
I wish to be fluent in all languages

Granted, but you accidentally cut your tongue and you're unable to speak ! sorry :p
I wish to be able to drink milk without wanting to vomit T.T

Granted. You can drink milk without wanting to vomit. However, when you drink it, you now enter an intense blood rage, slaughtering everythibg and everyone in a 10km radius. You become a monster, and the world is out for you.
I wish for a change in scenery. Don't let me down, corruptors.

Granted. All you can see now is the word "change", as far as your physical scenery change, we hope you enjoy the inextinguishable warmth of hell, go sit on the throne, A.K.A Lucifer's d**k

Change change change change change
«I wish I could wish for more wishes without them being corrupted»

Granted. You can have as many wishes as you want without them being corrupted, but you end up having no real desires and wants, your life feels pointless and empty.You hate everything and nothing can make you happy. Sorry.

I wish I could ask a question in my mind at any time and instantly know the answer.

>>184 Granted. You know the answer to all the questions you ask, but the only question you ever ask yourself is "why is the sky blue?" You endlessly answer the same question in your head over and over again.
I wish I were a dad.

>>185
granted, but this burden is to much and you end up in a maelstrom of drugs, alcohol and depression...

I wish that I could fly

You're flying, but you can't control where you're going and keep getting higher and higher until you leave earth and died from suffocation in outer space

I wish I had a combustible lemon that instantly goes through life's house and burn it down

Granted, but life's manager calls the cops on you.

I wish school didn't extend past exams

Granted, but you have to do free labour until the school year returns.

I wish that I could draw.

Granted, but you can only draw penguins.

I wish that I could lucid dream.

Granted but your dreams are nightmares

I wish that I could die

Granted, but you're reincarnated into the same exact life you have now, creating an endless loop of you living, apparently disliking it, dying, and reincarnating again.
I wish I were more conscientious.

Granted, but you'll be so conscientious that you can never stop working.

I wish that I can revive my dead friends.

Granted, they are revived, as a zombies

I wish I had a working portal gun

Granted, but you can only open a portal to the twilight universe.

I wish that I could eat without getting fat but still gain enough weight to be healthy.

Granted, but the only food you may eat is lima beans. Everything else turns to ashes in your mouth.
I wish for an evolution of human consciousness.

Granted, but human consciousness somehow evolved into mud. How? No one knows.

I wish I could fly.

granted, but the wings you gain mean you are hated by everybody and shunned from society.

I wish i never had to eat or sleep again.

granted. I had had gouged your eyes out choke you with it.
i really don't know if it granted your wish but i get to do what I want lol

I wish Enigami isn't the one that's gonna grant this wish

Granted.
I wish Enigami would grant this person's wish from now on

Granted. From this day forth, I will make it a priority to ruin all of Kurosuke's wishes. Sorry, kiddo.
I wish for some good coffee.

Have some

I wish Pieface would be the uke in the next PieNigami Fanfic

Granted.

I wish to find some nesspresso with hot chocolate and coffee.

Granted. you found them only to realize that they are belong to someone else
I wish those robot captcha dissapear from this site

>>202 That coffee sounds legitimately good...
>>204 Granted. There are no more robot capthcha. Now, bots dominate the site, destroying it in the process.
I wish for a flying machine.

Granted. You come to the realize that flying is terrifying to you.
I wish for my back to stop feeling as if a knife where dug into my shoulder blade. :^ (

Granted. Your back now feels as if a bullet dug into your shoulderblade.
I wish for more Durarara seasons

Granted. The new season never maybe adapted into anime (btw its true)

I wish I had a cheese

Granted. You'll find cheese in your fridge.
I wish I had all volumes of the Baccano! light novel

Granted, but you get the remains after they were all put through a paper shredder.

I wish my dad would stop looking through my chats.

Granted, but now he looks through your browser history.

I wish I had the Nintendo Switch.

Granted, all of your light switches are nintendo themed.


I wish for a new season of futurama.

Granted, but the quality of it is utter shite compared to the first five seasons.
I wish I were able to travel the world without repercussions.

Granted , you can travel the world ... of mars.


I want a billion bucks

>>205 glad you liked it. i want some Death Wish too. probably to keep me alive not just awake LOL

>>215 Sure. keep dreaming.

i wish my brother would get himself a job.

Granted . Your brother is a crab fisherman


I want a copy of the disappearance of haruhi suzumiya

Granted, but instead of a direct copy it is one of those rip-off series that you find at the bottom of the 50%+ off bins.

I wish that planning for a vacation wasn't so damn annoying.

Granted, in fact, every place you ever go for vacation is crowded as it's so simple now!

I wish I took time to actually get back on this site.

Granted. You have time for the site, but when you finally properly return, everyone else has left the site. Now, you're The Last Dollar.
I wish for an action movie starring Hatash titled "The Last Dollar."

Granted, but Hatash is only a background character, and the movie title is spelled incorrectly. (The Last Doller)

I wish to meet izaya and he is good and wholesome.

>>222
ChessBud. You are whisked away to another time and space where you meet the time whitch, Yuuko. She grants your wish, but there is always a price to be paid. In return for the opportunity to meet your idol as you wish to see him, you must take on the burden of his lesser traits. You are now a narcissistic sociopath with an insatiable lust for knowledge on the human condition.

I wish for the wisdom to achieve success in my business ventures so I may obtain sufficient wealth to change the lives of all those less fortunate than I.

granted, but now everyone looks up to you as a messianic figure and you are driven insane by the pressure.

i wish if i died, my conscience and memories would transport to the nearest living person.

Eziopandas915, your wish comes true and you die the next day but you live with all the memories of that person and end up going insane. I wish to have emotions.

Granted. You got Rage A+, sign in to save your progress.
I wish I had a repetitive life

Granted. Your life repeats, but everything is always the same and you never get the chance to change how anything is.

I wish to go to an anime of my choosing, and i can meet the characters if i want

Granted , you can only pick one and it can't be your favorite.


I wish for the ability to do absolutely anything with no negative reprocusions or side effects.


PS: just try to corrupt that .

Yeah granted go here. >>216

i wish i don't have to wish anymore and just corrupt like I used to do before

Granted. You never get anything you want again, and by corrupting you make everyone around you miserable.

I wish for eternal battery life on all my electronics

Granted. Your electronics will have eternal battery life but you will die after 24 hours.

I wish I could marry Orihara Izaya.

Granted. You will marry him, but he will be cheating on you with multiple people and you will eventually divorce, making you severely depressed.

I wish that vocaloids were real ( I have no life…)

Granted, vocaloids are now real people, but take up bad choices in music and become corrupt like many celebrities are today.

I wish to have all homework finished easily and is never late and is neatly done.

Granted, all your homework is done for you, as well as your school work, job, future, fun life, and future family. In other words you have literally nothing to do for the rest of your miserable life. Good luck.

I wish I could never die, so I could watch my enemies fall one by one by my hand. And live forever, maybe become a super hero.

Granted, you can and will never die and you shall suffer the crushing truth that living forever sucks

I wish for nekos

Granted, you receive Nekos, but they cannot communicate with you in any way or be within 15 feet of you.

I wish for manga (in english)

Granted!! This is manga in English

Thank you so much for relieving me of duty of wishing.

im not wishing. wahahah?

>>237 You will follow the damn rules, and like it! >:V
Fine, I'll make a wish on Kurosuke's behalf.
Kurosuke wishes for fish, like the scrub they are.

Granted, the fish are everywhere in your house.

I wish for people to just be quiet for an hour

Granted. But you will lose your aural sense after that, unable to hear anything until the day you die.

I wish for becoming a god and shaping the world in the way I want it to be.

Granted , you want to shape the world into a black hole


I want my very own std free harem

Granted, but everyone in your harem(excluding you) is either a small child or an elderly person...but hey still std free!

I wish that toilets weren't so loud when I flushed them.

Granted. But when peeing or pooping, everyone in the world could hear it

I want my asthma to begone

Granted. Your asmthma is miraculously cured, but you now suffer from bronchitis regularly.
I wish I were a master brewer/distiller/vintner.

Granted, but no one wants to buy your drinks.

I wish for my Death Note to actually work

Granted. You're not realizing it already work when your nemesis take a look at it and tried to write your name

I want the secret of universe

Granted but it's lame.

I wish that me and Firion would stop posting in the same time window because it's creepy o.o

granted, now you two can never interact. ever

i wish for narwhals

Granted. Apparently you got narwhals that got edited genetically to be carnivorous, and added legs.
I wish my room wouldn't be dirty anymore

Granted. Your room is pristine clean but you can never find anything in it. Want to find a pair of socks? Better start searching :D

I wish for a cup of never ending hot chocolate.

Granted. The fluid itself is never ending, but its heat isn't. Eventually, its just lukewarm at best.
I wish for the perfect roasted marshmallow.

>>252 Granted, your brother's cat steals it from you.

I wish for more vertical lines.

Sorry, Im a little hard of hearing, did you say horizontal lines? Granted.

I wish for unlimited nuggets (the chicken kind)

Your wish is unclear.
Granted. A portal from the nuggets factory to your house appeared so you can see how they're made and you're disgusted by how they "killed the chicken" so you stop liking them.

I wish I can be brave and took a bath with normal water instead of hot water so I wouldn't have to wait 15 minutes just for the water to boil

>>255 Granted, and then you get ecoli.

I wish blankets lived forever.

Granted, but they enslave the human race and are now the dominant species on earth.

I wish I could cook minute rice in 58 seconds.

Granted, but the rice would be burnt. That or it's very hard and not edible.

I wish I had enough money for a pair of Gucci Loafers.

granted, but you keep putting off buying them until they don't sell the ones you want anymore.

i wish for a coconut

Granted, it comes with an ape with a coconut gun that fires in spurts. He keeps shooting you, and it sure hurts.

I wish to snipe better on Playerunknown's Battlegrounds.

granted, but whenever you perform a perfect snipe, whoever that was in real life dies.

i wish for more cookies to eat

Granted. I gave you more cookies, but that is the last food you'll ever eat

I wish I could withstand cold

Granted you can withstand the cold, however when it reaches over 30 degrees C you are burned and over 35 you die.

I wish my assignments were completed (to A standard level)

Granted.your assignments were completed bt they were destroyed just afterwards.
I wish for peace in my life.

Granted, you will have peace in your life, however your life will only last for one more day.

I wish people were more tolerant to each other.

Granted, but now all of their intolerance is transferred to you, causing you to be the most intolerant person on earth. Congrats.

i wish that i didnt have to do my book report and my life wont be ruined over it

You don't have to do the book report...
But you have to write a 8000 page essay on carpets


I wish for David bowie to come back and make music

Granted. David Bowie returns and makes music, but is a lich who uses his music magic to start a zombie apocalypse.
I wish the zombie genre would just fade away already.

Granted; the zombie genre fades away, but it is replaced by the exact opposite- a genre of unborn souls controlling their pregnant mothers from the inside.

I wish i could write a story and live as a character in the book's world.

Granted. You can write the story and become a character in it, but by 'character', it means you become just a printed symbol, not a person, within the story. As a result, you lose your animacy.
I wish this thread would never fall from the front page of Random again.

Granted, but you have to keep it going by posting every other wish and occasionally responding to yourself.

I wish PopTarts filling would always be the perfect eating temperature after heating.

Granted, but the poptarts never have icing on top, there's just the plain ones.

I wish I could jump in and out of whatever show or book I want and be myself.

granted, but you came to a story which is in a middle of a war thus you died there

I wish Enigami would do his previous wish

Granted, but due to the page constantly staying on top, you are brought into it and find yourself having fun. When he stops doing it, you are left by yourself, responding to your own wishes.

I wish I was an immortal Dragon!

Granted, but the only way to stay immortal is to swallow sandpaper every day for the rest of your life.

I wish I had a Doof Warrior guitar.

Granted, But playing it will make your hands bleed untill you are unable to play.


I wish to be able to fly.

Granted, but every 24 hours your wings will be torn off and grow back

I wish I could control time on my body and everything around me

Granted, but every time you use the ability you age by one month.

I wish I had telekinesis.

Granted, but you only have enough strength to lift up a grain of sand from the ground, and that makes you nearly faint from the effort.

I wish I had the ability to do a backflip.

Granted, but once you start you can not stop.

i wish i could be strong.

Granted but everytime you use your strength you muscles get weaker

I wish I could be able to do anything

Granted, but every time you do something you can't already do you are forced to eat between 1-10 cockroaches.

I wish dragons existed

Granted, but as soon as they're brought into the world it starts a war.

I wish I was able to enter any movie or television program's universe so long as I'm watching it.

Granted, however, you are forced to remain in that world for one year, regardless of the show you watch.

I wish the people on this site would never give up on it.

Granted, people on this site will never give up on it, but you will get kicked out of the Dollars immediately.

I wish people would read the FAQ.

Granted, but three minutes after reading the FAQ, all the information everyone obtains from it is forgotten.

I wish I could watch Youtube ad-free without having to pay for Youtube red.

>>288 granted (just use adblock lmao) but the only videos you can watch are spiderman and elsa videos.

i wish i had friends

Granted but eventually they get tired of you and leave.
I wish my class schedule was less hectic.

Granted, however now your classes start at 8:00am and end at 6:00pm every day of the week, except sundays.

I wish I had infinite wishes.

Granted, but the only thing you can wish for is infinite wishes.

I wish Nickleback never existed.

Granted, but you'll be haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost which sings Thriller until the day you die.

I wish the world were a peaceful place.

Granted, but you have to die.

I wish I can experience peace myself.

Granted my dude, but everyone around you becomes mentally unstable and super suicidal.


I wish I had a stuffed crust pizza right now lol. Meat lovers, with bacon, sausage and pepperoni... and a side of buffalo wings.. and jucy burger.. I'm really hungry.

Granted, but all the meat isn't what it is meant to be, but instead cooked human meat.

I wish I could live as the main character in an anime.

Granted, but you're a murder mystery protagonist and all you're friends die.

>>297 that doesn't sound like a downside... I have no friends and I would be a murderer happily... And you forgot to make a wish.

>>297 also *your

I wish for the erasure of continuity.

Granted, but you'll have to remake the Ship of Theseus all over again.

I wish I could eat the hole of a donut.

Granted, but now the only thing you can eat is holes. Nothing else for the rest of your life.

I wish I was a lizard.

Granted, but kids would experiment on you whenever they see you (like cut your tail).

I wish I can sing really really high.

Granted. You can sing perfectly when you smoke enough weed.

I wish I had a neverending pizza

Granted, your pizza is infinite, and suffocates every form of life there is because all the pizza has nowhere to go.

I wish life is more simple.

Granted. But now it is so simple that you are fucking bored.

I wish I could live in a castle on the clouds.

Granted, but the castle is also made of clouds so you can't really live in it.

I wish I can forget my favorite series/books so I can relive discovering and falling in love with them again.

Granted, but because you forgot it, it fades away and you never find it ever again.

I wish dolphins could fly.

granted, with somekind of new body parts which capable of turning gravitational power upside down. But then they're hunted down for those body parts thus making them extinct

I wish ads would disappear

Granted. However, due to the lack of ads, Facebook now only takes up 1% of the screen in total, and soon shuts down due to complaints and not enough funding.

(P.S. Try adblock.)

I wish I had a lolipop.

Granted. However, you will have extremely exaggerated diabetes that will require you to drink seven drums of insulin an hour.

>>312 I wish I was smart. ^▽^

Granted but you will be the only human being alive and thus you cannot compare your intellect.

I wish I can be disciplined.

Granted. However, during the process of getting disciplined, you were put through punishment, and as a result have become a major masochist. Enjoy!

I wish gay marriage was legal worldwide. (yay Australia putting it to vote!)

Granted. But all marriages must be gay and and nobody is allowed to have sex before marriage. Thus, the human population will drop to nothing.

I wish I can live a life in a fantasy world that I desire.

(first of all... *gasps* I'm pretty sure that wouldn't be that bad... Sperm donation is a thing you know... So are test tube babies. (technically.))

Granted. However, in order to live in that world, you must slaughter your entire family, and all your friends before you can.

I wish I was Tatsuya Shiba.

>>317 How cruel. You're married with someone esle but you bear someone's esle baby. Ok whatever.

Granted but I have no idea who is that. Lets just say, even if youre him, you will never be noticed and known.

I wish I can stop wishing.

>>318 sperm donations are basically made for homosexual couples, or couples that have some sort of problem with having a baby, for example, if the father is sterile. It's actually a great idea in my opinion. Also Tatsuya Shiba is never really noticed, or well known anyway. That's his goal. So... No downsides, yay!!!

Granted. But due to you never being able to wish, you never have any goals at all for the rest of your life.

I wish I had an idea for a new wish.

granted! you have an idea of a wish to make another wish and it keeps repeating.

I wish it would rain tomorrow night

>>319 Alright. And also, I take it back, not granted.

>>320 Granted. But after that, the weather will always be a pain for you.

I wish the person granting this will not reply.

Granted. However, due to the need to continue this thread, your wish is actually denied.

I wish I was a successful youtuber.

Granted, you are a successfull gaming youtuber. People now write erotic fan fictions about you, and you cant leave your house without tweens yelling random references at you.



GIVE ME A MONSTERGIRL GF RIGHT NOW!...I wish

Granted. She's a spider woman, specifically a black widow. She'll fuck you, then kill you.
I wish I never had to have another depressing conversation ever again.

Granted. But from now on you will never ever have any conversation at all.

I wish I could control people's mood with music.

Granted, however you can only control them if you know the song off by heart, and you can only give them one command.

I wish I could speak every language.

Granted, but you will be deaf.

I wish I can rule the world.

Granted. You rule the world, but humanity lives now on Mars.

I wish I had all the knowledge of this world.

Granted, but all the knowledge will be false.

I wish I can live a life that I desire.

Granted. But the life you desire doesn't desire you

I wish I can grant my own wish

Granted, but now you don't feel like wishing anymore.

I wish I have a dog bigger than me.

Granted, however whenever he goes to pounce on you, which he does often, your bones are broken and you have to go to the hospital.

I wish I had a pet dragon that would do everything I say.

Granted, but it'll take everything you say literally. You say you want to roast your friend (with a joke) and get arrested for murder the next day.

I wish I had more time to watch anime and shit.

Granted, but you always have to keep him chained up or else he will kill you.

I wish I could read people's minds.

(Yato) Granted but you can only hear everyone's thoughts all at once and you can't turn it off or tune them out.
I wish I could undo any of my own actions that I choose.

>>333 granted, however due to you having more time, you are locked in a room for the rest of your life to study why you were given more time for anime.
>>335 granted, however for every action you undo, an even worse action takes it's place.

I wish I could speak Japanese.

Granted, but your Japanese would be weeby like some anime addict.

I wish this site is much more active.

Granted, however due to the increased traffic, people must pay to be a part of the dollars.

I wish I had the ability to start and stop time at will.

Granted, but whenever you stop the time one person precious to you will die.

I wish people stopped spamming our boards with bullshit.

Wish granted, however, you are kicked off the site and can never use it again.

I wish I had a talking pig.

Granted. But it will only say bad words (swearing and cussing words).

I wish I could talk with animals.

Granted, you can talk anytime you want with animals. They can't speak nor understand what you're saying. This is why you need to be careful with your wishes

I wish Chronos would be politer just a little lil tiny bit more

Granted. But everyone esle will be rude as heck.

I wish I can eat sushi everyday.

>>343 Granted. You got mercury poisoning.
I wish I had an AI to do all my graduate school applications for me.

Granted. However, after doing all the school applications, it takes over the world, causing Judgement day to happen.

I wish I was a terminator.

granted, but you'll never be rebuilted

I wish my HomeWork would do themself

Wish granted, however you get ten times the amount of homework every day, and you have to manually do it all every ten days.

i shall wish in behalf of >>347 but next time, please do wish something.

Ok, i wish Enigami would be less mean to me from now on. XD

>>348 Soz. I completely forgot to make a wish...

Wish granted. However, everyone else is really mean to you instead.

I wish my memory wasn't so stupid.

wish granted.

But now you remember everything at once. frying your brain.

I wish that the main would stop being flooded with crap posts

Granted. However, now all the other boards will be flooded with crap posts.

I wish the world was a good place, so that we could stop bothering how to make the world a better place.

Wish granted. but now we bother with why the earth isn't flat.

I wish that the colour blue never existed

Granted, however, to make up for it, a new colour is created.

I wish Snyper wouldn't always forget to make his fucking wish...

Granted. Snyper never forgets to wish again, but now you always forgwt your wishes.
I wish I could create anything.

((I will say at this point in time, I did write a wish.
But then the page reloaded and I forgot to write it again.))

GRANTED!!! HOWEVER!!! You can only create something as long as you have a clear image of it in your mind, but the power also comes with eternal INSANE migraines (good luck.)

I WISH I could remember anything I wanted at any time.

GRANTED. But now you will see your grandma naked every time you recall something with this power

I wish that a new thread would be created for this

Granted. However, this thread has to be filled up first.

I wish I had a superpower of my choice.

Granted, but you can only use it when you are extremely drunk, and not thinking clearly.

I wish that I could leave this word and enter and exit any anime universes of my choice whenever I want.

Granted, but everyone is out to kill you and when you die, you're stuck in the real world.

I wish I can have lucid dreams/nightmares

Granted. However, if you die in the dream/nightmare, you die in real life as well.

I wish the person above me will start making wishes...

Granted. No side effect.

And I swear I did make a wish with that one.

I wish my computer will stop trying to kill itself.

Granted. Your computer stops trying to kill itself, nutting up and getting it over with already.
I wish I had fewer regrets.

>>364 Granted, but now you have fewer experiences.

I wish humans would go back to basing their economies off of a bartering system.

Granted, but no one ever wants what you have to offer.
I wish we lived in a post-scarcity economy.

Granted, but now we have such a surplus with no place to hold it all.

I wish for prosperity for my children

>>367 Granted, they are forcibly taken from you and adopted by a wealthy couple who spoil them rotten.

I wish for updates that didn't remove features.

Granted, however, now every update adds things, and soon your game is so large it's ridiculous, and you computer can't handle it anymore.

I wish I could time travel at my exact age.

Granted, with additional stress, tiredness, paralysis, and poop, making you an embryo at the end.

I wish for a wish.

Granted, but its a dreaded 'fish wish.'
I wish for unlimited power.

Granted! However, every time you use you power, you lose part of your body, or stamina, equal to the amount of power you used.

I wish I had a better memory.

Granted, although you can't control what you remember and thus the surge of memories all come at the same time causing your brain to explode.

I wish I had a donut.

Here's your free Raspberry and anthrax filled donut enjoy


I wish I had the power of all the stands

Granted you have the powers of: Moody Jazz, Flaccid Pancake,Highway Go Go,Small feet, Maiden heaven, Zipper man, emperor crimson. etc.

I wish I would stop replying to my own wishes

Granted! Just stop replying. Seriously. Stop.

I wish people would stop being dickheads.

Granted! Now, people have their balls in the middle

I wish that I'm a crow

Granted! You become a human for 5 seconds after you sneeze at all.

Iwish for a cow.

>>379 Granted, the cow is dead

i wish i wasnt poor

Granted. But now you are living in c h i n a

I wish that I would remember to remain active

Granted, however, now you have no social life, or life at all, outside this site.

I wish I had enough skill to make an anime.

I wish I could draw so I could make my own manga

>>382 Granted, but every time you do something anime-related, crows will flood your room to watch.

I wish I could be motivated

>>383 Granted. Though, you can only draw when you're in this site.

I wish I could be motivated
(I repeated my wish so ye OUO 'cause there are two wishes not responded to)

Granted, however, whenever you feel motivated, you then feel demotivated for the same length of time you feel motivated for.

I wish anime was even more awesome then it already is.

Granted. Though, there will be lots of cliché throughout the awesome anime seasons.

I wish I can be friends with crows.

Granted, but you can't be friends with any other beings.

I wish I can stop dwelling on unnecessary stuff.

Granted. On the other hand, you will only stop if your heart truly wants it to stop.

I wish I can study right now.

Granted but you study so much that you go to bed really late and end up sleeping through whatever you studied for.
I wish I felt better prepared for life after college

Granted, you feel better prepared, but this feeling is false, and you still aren't prepared at all.

I wish I could devote more time to my hobbies.

granted. Your time for your hobbies are eating up time for your social life and you end up being alone all of your life. including possible supporters for whatever you're doing.

i wish my pimples would disappear

Granted but there will be a lot of fuck ups.

I wish I had money.

Granted. You have money but are corrupted by it and can never seem to have enough.


I wish was stronger

Granted, you are now stronger. However, due to your strength, you have become isolated from everyone else you know.

I wish that real life was just as cool as anime.

Granted, all of reality has morphed to resemble your Chinese cartoons and everyone subsequently gets crippled because anime anatomy makes no sense and about a thousand people with weird powers try to take over the world at once. And you're the only protag in sight busy fending off a harem of traps.

I wish I could be reborn as a rock

For a start. >>397 Anime is not chinese, it's Japanese.... So... Yeah... Besides, who said I would be trying to help the world, I wanna see it burn.

Granted. You are now reborn as a rock, in the past. Unfortunately, you have been reshaped though, and painfully sculpted into a statue, which is then covered in lava as you live in Pompeii. Have fun dying again, as a rock.

I wish people wouldn't be as big assholes as most people are.

>>398
>Anime is not chinese, it's Japanese.... So... Yeah...

It's an old meme, he wasn't being serious.

>>398 Granted. They're not assholes. They are Close-minded.

i wish for a really strong coffee.

Granted, however the coffee is so strong that you can never stay still for the next 2 years.

I wish I could have my own RWBY weapon and Semblance.

Granted, but your weapon is based on a kitty and your semblance only works when you say "meow" or cat puns

I wish I can fly.

>>401 omg thats what i need.

>>402 granted. you can fly. you tried, you jumped off a bridge, you realized you can only fly for a few seconds.

i wish for a wish

granted, you wish for a wish and use it for a wish and generating the same pattern until the end of time

I wish the split screen keyboard would be brought back

Granted! However now the keyboard is so small when it is split, that you basically can't use it.

I wish that people had wings, and mine were the biggest of all.

Granted although yours is so big that it is such a hassle to move them.

I wish to be a new kind of avian creature (close to crows tho)

You are now the Flying-J
You are the only specimen EVER and you live a short life


I wish for an Amane Suzuha body pillow

>>407 Granted, it is stuffed with an actual girl's dead body, though.
I wish for someone to make a fish wish.

Granted, but they wish to fuck that fish

I wish my friends weren't perverts.

>>409 granted but they dont like you and leave you and abandon you, bully you and utterly make you try to kill yourself.



i wish for

Granted!
However the horrors from the void decided to make you into their sacrifice. Your soul is now eternally stuck in the void. Have fuuun~

I wish I wasn't as hungry all the time.

Granted
You will not only never be hungry ever again
You will also Die of Starvation From the fact that you don't want to eat anything

I wish For everybody to have an Amane Suzuha Bodypillow

Granted. Everyone shoves their pillows up your ass, though.
I wish I had a personal gourmet chef who worked for me for free.

Granted. However, there has been a recent increase in murder in your area.
I wish to be flexible.

Granted. However, it can only be used during sexy time or when you really have to pee.
I wanna meet the band Muse.

You have terminal cancer and your dying wish is to meet muse



I wish for some Amane Suzuha Hentai

You get it, but it turns out to be a trap... and it's all you'll ever get to see.

I wish to have the abilty to be completely honest all the time.

Granted, you are now consistently totally honest about your thoughts and feelings. you have 100% lost the ability to lie. And in addition to that you've lost any possible filter and everything you say comes out in its rawest form leading everyone to soon think you're just an insensitive asswipe.

I wish I didn't need to eat food to survive.

>>417 I mean, I'm pretty sure that's already a thing.

>>418 You need to drink piss to live instead.

I wish Thanksgiving was on the same date everywhere.

Granted, but Thanksgiving will only happen once every century.

I wish I can stop being energetic.

Granted you died because you didn't have the energy to continue living anymore.

I wish I was more energetic.

Granted, but you gain so much energy you create a nuclear fission

I wish I had new pencils

Granted, You also get multiple bonus pens. Congratulations.

I Wish i won the lottery

>>423
Granted. However, this is a lottery to see who can get stoned to death as a sacrifice for the coming harvest season. Now get in the middle of the circle.
I wish my breaks were longer.

Granted, you become homeless and unemployed

I wish i didn't have to sleep

Granted! You no longer have to sleep. However, your body has not forgotten, meaning that you spend the rest of your life looking like you really need to sleep, even if you don't.

I wish I was prime minister.

Granted! But your the new prime minister ofor an island full of kittens (roll with it)

I wish I didn't stay up all night

Granted, now the second the sun sets you are physically incapable of staying awake and this has drastically affected your life in more ways than one.

I wish I was like Beyoncé

I wish I could meet bts

You now have hair like beyonce but you're a foot shorter and 30 pounds heavier

>>429 thats not how the game works

>>428 granted but everyone sees you as a copycat, sadly you never get famous and make a career

i wish i had a healthy diet

>>431 Actually, NEKO answered in two different posts. 429 is the wish, 430 is the reply to the previous wish. So, playing the game right, technically.
Also, GRANTED~ But not your diet is so healthy, it's actually unhealthy for you, and you get even fatter.

I wish I could live inside an anime.

>>432 i poSTeD thAT beFORe thE pAgE shoWed heR rePlY

>>432 wish granted, you now live in the worst anime possible.

I wish I had more time to do things.

Granted, but you still procrastinate 'til the last minute.

I wish I could figure out what I should deem most important in my life so that I could focus on it more?

Granted, and now you have figured out that the most important thing in your life is to read random boring chats of other people and you are now scheduled to die of boredom in around 3 seconds.

I wish I could watch anime and do my thing in peace without anyone interfering every second, minute or any other possible unit of time.

>>436 granted, you're isolated on a tiny island where the only thing to really do is watch anime and eat fish, and drink sea-water with no hope of contact from the outside world.

I wonder if that's how Japan was invented....

I wish I would stop disappearing so much.

Granted, you will no longer be able to disappear. but everyone's now disappeared.

I wish I can survive this.

GRANTED!!! But now everyone else is dead, and your left completely by yourself. Have fun~

I wish I could use the best kind of magic. Explosion magic. Megumin style.

Granted. You blow yourself up. Shocker.
I wish I were the protagonist or at least a side character in Firion's upcoming grocery store isekai novel Re:Stocked.

Granted, you'll become one of the customers in one of the story part. But someone from another grocery store which originated from that world itself will warn you to not buy something in our grocery store or they will send an assassin to your house. Hopefully Chronos wouldn't lost en route anymore.

I wish for the old RTT to be closed sooner so we can use the new ones

email Reltair or Spam it.

I wish you guys wait for the old RTT to finish before making new one.

Granted. I don't want to corrupt this wish, but... everybody waits for the old Rtt to finish, but it never does because everyone stopped using this site and thus a new rtt never begins.

I wish I could I could figure out what job I should choose as a career because I've already had five different jobs, and I'm getting annoyed about this, I don't know what I want to do.

Granted! However you have chosen to be a male stripper.
Have fun?

I wish people wouldn't forget things.

Granted! They didnt forget things, however they started forgetting people, places, and everything else.

i wish i could kill that whiteknight on suggestions.

Granted. You kill the whitenight on suggestions, but they come back as a ghost and haunt you, spouting SJW bullshit at all hours of the day, and only you can hear it.
I wish Kurosuke would stop going on about me ignoring her wishes. It was an accident, I swear!

Granted. But now, everyone else is going on at you instead.

I wish I was the Doctor.

>>448 lol FYI, there was a time when everyone was at him and NZP and he's still cool as a cucumber.

>>449 Only the coolest of cucumbers.
>>448 Granted. You become the Doctor, but your TARDIS suffers catastrophic damage in transit your next destination. It becomes nothing more than a normal police booth, with you stuck inside, unable to escape its confines. Even your trusty sonic screwdriver is helpless to aid you.
I wish all words contained only consonants from now on.

grntd bt y mst wrt lk ths.
I wish that internet trolls never existed >:(

>>451 Granted. Internet trolls never existed. Instead, all people who are internet trolls are actual trolls, which kill and eat people. They're kinda like Titans. Have fun living behind a wall or whatever.
I wish all words contained only vowels.

Your wish is granted, but only for yourself, therefore you lose communication with the rest of the world because you can only speak with vowels

I wish I had incredibly eyesight

Granted, but now all your other senses have gone.

I wish I could just keep watching anime and eating, the other things aren't necessary.

You now have shit taste.

I wish people made harder wishes to corrupt.

Granted. People wish for much more uncorruptable wishes, but because of there level of difficulty these wishes are also ungrantable.

I wish for everything to keep going the way it's going.

Granted. Everything keeps going the way it's going for everyone. Except you. Your life is now thirty times worse then ever.

I wish I didn't have to eat, drink, or sleep ever again.

>>459 My life has been going downhill since I got out of highschool lol. I got surgery, Found out my intestines are completely lose and not attached to my abdomen so they could kill me if they just tangle on eachother one day, Developed a seizure disorder (that could also kill me, already got a black eye from one and some stitches on my eyebrows [I have pictures], lol), almost overdosed on caffeine pills once (was throwing up multiple times for a over a 24 hour period and couldn't sleep because of it), I started doubting my religion hard and after researching it, ended up leaving it and all the friends I had there, and now they're all shunning me, lol. Life's already given me a bunch of sour lemon's, I learned from this that I should live everyday like it's gonna be my last, with a smile on my face, my happiness doesn't depend on no one else anymore nor will it ever again. I'm pretty sure I can handle 30x worse than this, I don't care anymore. Also...
Your wish is granted, you no longer have to eat, drink, or sleep anymore... you're in vegetable state in a hospital for the rest of your life, that's why.

Just realized I forgot to make a wish, lol.

I wish that the person who grants this wish doesn't corrupt it >:).

Granted. Everyone else on this thread corrupts it instead.
I wish for food.

Granted. The food wad poisoned and you died.

I wish for world peace.

Granted, the the way it was achieved was by world war and genocide from all races

I wish I could some new socks

>>465 Granted but you can only wear them on your hands

I wish homework never existed

Granted. Homework was never existed. Instead, school goes on for another four hours instead, followed by another hour of forced study at school. Enjoy a day nearly twice as long.

I wish I was a badass in every aspect possible.

Granted, You're a badass, you poop everywhere and get diarrhea constantly, and when people see you approaching they cover their noses for fear of death.

I wish for pizza.

>>468 Granted, but it;s snyper delivering

I wish I didn't have to sleep

>>469 Granted, but now you can't at all and you slowly but surely spiral into insanity which then leads to death because your brain never has a chance to recharge.

I wish I understood how to get people to like me.

>>470
Granted, but now your too famous and you have people stalking you consistantly and constantly for the rest of your life.

I wish I could see again.

Granted. You can see again, but are blinded by the light, and wander into traffic, being struck by a bus and dying painfully.
I wish I could change the properties of matter just by thinking about it.

Granted. But you can only change the properties of things by thinking about them, and only after licking them.

I wish I wasn't me.

Granted. But now you have become Water the Toxic Savior.
I wish that the new dollars website would hurry up and be ready soon.

Granted. But someone corrupted it and took over so it was tranferred to the Blue Squares.

I wish I wasn't gullible.

Granted.
You believe nothing and stop breathing to conserve oxygen.


I wish Oingo Boingo would Reform and make more amazing music

>>474 Must you torture me so?

>>476 GRANTED! They reformed and made more amazing music! But, you went deaf. So you can't hear it.

I wish I could kill anyone I want for free.

I wish I have a loli imouto. are u keisatsu or FB*? just kidding~ I wish someone give me cintiq-kun

>>477 Granted. But magically, anyone you targeted will realized that they're being targeted thus they hired Chronos to be an Assassin despite the fact that he lost en route during one of his mission
>>478 u need to grant and corrupt wishes from the person above you before proceed to make a wish.

I wish Sausage would scatter around this site like a plague

Granted! There is no downsides. (the sausaging has already begun. *evilly laughs*)

I wish more people would SAUSAGE.

^

^ you eventually become very sore from all the sausaging
My wish: I get to live forever

You will now be mentally disabled and physically handicapped for the rest of your life.

I wish I could leave the Matrix.

Granted, but you went into an alternate universes' matrix

I wish I could travel between universes

Granted, you can travel through the void between universes but you can never actually go to any of them.

I wish for ears.

Granted! However, you lose both arms and one foot (you can choose) as payment. They don't work either so.....

I wish I had another wish.

Granted, but you waste this one, too.
I wish I had a pocket dimension I could escape into and store stuff whenever I wanted/needed to.

Granted! But everything that's stored inside disappears and reappears somewhere completely random in the world. Including yourself.

I wish for unlimited wifi.

Granted, but everyone can join and it gets really slow.

I wish that I could shapeshift.

Granted, But you can only shapehift into a sloth

I wish everyone could be as awesome as me for a day, so they would love me and want to be me even more.

Granted. We're all narcissists now.
I wish I could jump into alternate realities at will.

Granted, but they are all the same

I wish for a slice of pumpkin pie

i wish im smarter

Granted. But everyone else gets smarter too... Smarter than you.

I wish I was more assertive.

>>494 Granted, but now everyone just thinks your rude.

I wish people wouldn't ruin my childood.

Granted, but now time flows backward. People would emerge from the cemetery and then de-grow until they're baby enough to be pushed back to their mother's tummy.

I wish people would stop calling each other an asshole

Granted, but now the only person being called an asshole is you

I wish I wasn't an introvert

Granted, but now everyone else is an introvert and you're the only extrovert.


I wish I knew how to deal with socialisation.

Thx everyone if you still have more ideas though do comment on this thread.
Thank you😎

Wrong thread(sorry)

>>499>>500 we have delete post button for reasons indeed

>>498 Granted, but now everyone is anti-social

I WISH SOMEONE WOULD TURN OFF MY CAPSLOCK BUTTON

Granted but now they completely turned off your and rebooted your computer/phone/etc..

I wish I had a pet tiger.

Granted, but it kills you.

I wish I knew my purpose in life

Granted, but you will never be able to achieve that purpose.

I wish to accomplish all my goals in my lifetime.

Granted, but your lifetime is short.
I wish I can shout out my mind.

Granted, but it comes across as incomprehensible to other people.

I wish I could live without ever relying on other people's help.

Granted, but you can't open doors on your own ever again.

I wish I would be a truly great person.

Granted, but everyone else thinks you're horrible.

I wish I could automatically get references.

Granted, but they're all terrible.

I wish teddy bears were fluffier.

bump.

>>509 Granted, but those teddy bears will be alive at night and will love to play hide and seek with their owners while holding a knife.

I wish it's raining dollar notes everyday.

granted, but it rains so many notes that you are stuck in your house

i wish that i was doing great at school like all A s

Wish granted. You get all A's but the grading system is reversed.

I wish I was in a coma

Granted, but you only fall into a coma right after the love of your life confess his/her love for you.

I wish I could have made the right choices..

Granted, you make the right choices then you wake up

I wish for 1 billion dollars in cash

>>514 lucky me. He did like 2 years ago. where's my coma?

>>515 Granted, but they will be stolen money from underground casinos, banks, Governments, the cartels, Albanian mafia and Chuck Norris' safe. All with a total of 1 billion dollars in cash.

I wish for lucky Yellow Key to finally get his coma once and for all :)

>>516your wish has been granted its called a 70 day free trial with death :3 or you can just sleep in :/
I wish for world peace (how are you gonna corrupt that?)

Granted. There will be World peace for 10 consecutive business days then it will be followed by a global purged.


I wish Doraemon is real

>>519 Granted. Doraemon will be real on a different planet, and most likely will destroy a single sign of life on said planet.

I wish learning Japanese wasn't so hard

>>520 granted. those who speak Japanese will be persecuted and sent into the weeb ghettos by the nontaku nazis.

i wish that when i get sent to hell i get to marry satan and have his devil babies

Granted, but the devil is always in the details Satan will turned you into a breeding station to increase the number of his minions he will give u the face-hugger as a wedding gift.

I wish instead of an all out war Countries like US, north korea and Russia will just settle everything in a rock-paper-scissor contest.

Bump (because i have no Idea)

Granted, but the countries that get beaten get crushed by a rock, crumpled like a piece of paper, or cut by scissors(I guess).

I wish for some bourbon Bellavitano Cheese.

I wish for all the worlds deceases to disappear and be replaced by worse ones

Okay, and while that happens, you get infected by every single one, because of no immunity, while everyone else is unaffected.

I wish for no more wars

You are now the only person alive, can't start a war if there is no one to fight

I wish that I didn't need sleep

granted! you died. you don't need sleep when you're dead!

I wish to find the answer to the B equation.

Granted but once you find the answer you forget it instantly which goes on and on in a vicious cycle of memory loss.

I wish for one more Sunday.

Granted, but you also now have 12 more Mondays. Good luck.

I wish my dog didn't die.

Granted, but u did...........

I wish that the next person doesnt corrupt my wish :)

Granted, but everyone after me does.

I wish to win the lottery.

Granted but due to heart complications you die right after

I wish for mashed potatoes

Granted, but they are frozen cold and every heated appliance in your vicinity is no longer functional.

I wish for working legs.

Granted, but your legs look like the legs of a Tyrannosaurus rex. And as an added bonus to complete the look, your arms now also look like the arms of a Tyrannosaurus rex.

I wish my violin teacher forgot that we have a lesson tomorrow.

granted, they forgot so now you have a sub who's terrible.

I wish for blood

Granted, put later on in life you get mauled by a vampire and sucked dry

I wish for the end of all homework in the universe

Granted, all students live in school until they graduate so you never do your work at home

I wish for unlimited tacos

Granted, the universe now is nothing but tacos.

I wish for a revolution.

Granted, but it fails.

I wish to become the ruler of a country.

Granted, but you run a dictatorship and your people hate you.
I wish all books had happy endings.

Granted, but they have happy beginnings and bodies too, depriving them of the necessary conflict needed to have a plot and be entertaining.

I wish for new videogames to stop being horribly priced.

Granted, but the new video games are trash.

I wish world peace is achieved.

Granted, but now the world is over populated because there was nothing to do but screw around.

I wish for my true love to exist.

Cut my hair for the first time in at least 3.5 years, if not 4, and it feels great to not have to deal with 3 foot long hair anymore.

Granted, but your true love doesn't love you.

I wish I could turn into a bird.

Granted, but a kid takes you hostage and locks you up in their drawer.

I wish I could stop time.

>>548 Granted, but time stops for you too and you're stuck for eternity.

I wish I could live in a library.

Granted! But the library is so old that the books aren’t readable anymore and the dust is so heavy you suffocate.

I wish for peanut butter fudge.

Granted, but the peanut butter doesn't insulate the chilling and subsequently you either have to be cold all year or wrack up a horrible heating bill.

My wish is to stop forgetting to add a wish

granted! but now u cant remember whether u had wish to add or not

i wish for jeremy corbyn to suck my toes

Granted! But afterwards he will die from toe fungus of the mouth (I do not mean that you have bad feet hygiene it just happens)

I wish for biscuits

i wish i had the time to tell him i love him..fuk.

>> 27_1071875

why didn’t you grant my wish :(

>>Raffle
Granted, but the biscuits are poisoned.

I wish I could fly.

>>556 Granted but you relive that day over and over in a time loop. That loop breaks when you choose not to tell him

Boy I'm a villain...

someone else grant 558

>>557 Why did this resonated within me?

>>558 Granted, but you're prohibited to step on land anymore

I wish someone could teach me how to buy games online.

Granted, but they teach you how to buy games in pig Latin

I wish for a way to not have to sleep

Granted but now your kidneys are shot for the amount of energy drinks that would require

I wish I had more help funding causes <<<

Granted, but you can only support the Neo-Nazi movement

I wish my computer wasn't slow

Granted! But now it runs so fast you can’t keep up with it.

I wish for something fun to do

>>564 Granted! You are given free range at one of the greatest amusement parks in the world, but quickly grow bored and disassociate and now nothing seems fun anymore.

I wish I had tons of money and didn't have to work!

Granted! But all of your money is in pennies with no bank account.

I wish anime girls were real

Granted! But all of them won't like and love you.

I wish Mathematics is easy to learn and study.

Granted! But you would fail at your History Classes.

I wish that I could have a Kit Kat. (What, I'm allergic to one of the ingredients.)

Granted! But now all candy you touch turns into a Kit Kat.

I wish I can change my appearance at will. (Think shapeshifter. It would be so cool. I could even be someone's doppelganger.)

Granted! But every time you shapeshifter into something you have to stay in that form for a year.

I wish for some warm weather.

Granted! However your body now registers cold as hot and hot as cold.

I wish to never need to sleep again.

>>571 Granted. You no longer need sleep, but you have a ceaseless, burning desire to sleep, instead. However, you are also an insomniac now, too, for whom no sleep aid has any effects. The object of your desire is forever out of your reach.
I wish I weren’t living on a strict timeline right now.

Granted but now your timeline speeds up,and slows down whenever it wants.

I wish for a danish(the pastry)

Granted but it's your 2nd favorite.

I wish for every other persons wish to have a positive outcome

Granted, but now people only wished for bad things to befall upon others. The only positive outcome is that people got their wish granted no matter how twisted their wish was.

I wish everything was free and everything to be peaceful.

Granted, but you die before you get to do anything.

I wish I was a God.

Granted! You are now God and another god has destroyed you Game Over.

I wish to have a creme puff.

Granted, But it's expired so you end up spending all night on the toilet.

I wish I was immortal

Granted, but your life is so miserable that you'd think that you're better off dead but just can't.

I wish Youtube wasn't the mega-corporate online video platform.

Granted and poof no YouTube anymore!

I wish to go 30 minutes into the past.

Granted, but you have to relive the same 30mins over and over again, like the movie groundhog day, more like ground hog 30 mins oof

I wish to be isekai'd into the world of anime

Granted, but you were reborn as a low level goblin. Only serving the purpose of giving XP to the Hero by offering your life.

I wish I can talk to animals while still being able to kept talking to humans.

Granted, but your voice will be so cringe that no animals or human would be willing to listen to you.

I wish to go back to my childhood.

Granted but you go back to when you were a baby can’t control your body and suffer through all those dirty diapers.

I wish for a good conclusion.

Granted, Donna survived through high school after getting through all those dirty diapers, she managed to jumpstart the space exploration technology. We distributed human population to multiple planets and earth is healthy once more. But then disaster struck and Donna was accussed of sorcery, they lynched him and humanity is set back a few thousand years. Thousands of culture is lost, anime stopped existing and Durarara was forgotten forever. Ultimately leading to the death of Dollars as an entity in this universe.

Damn, I wish the average IQ of people were higher.

Granted, but you'll be the dumbest person alive.

I wish the two people above me suffer through dirty diapers too.

(Ya'll roasted me well. BTW >>585 you used both 'she' and 'him')

Granted, but they end up enjoying it, and are grateful for your wishing it upon them.

I wish I could stop worrying.

(>>585 Next time, say 'sim', they obviously prefer that)

Granted, but you'll become lazy.

I wish people won't treat my DMs as their rant dumpster.

(>>587 I prefer 'she' but 'sim' or even 'simp' will do kek)

Granted! now it’s a rat infested dumpster.

I wish that I could have an unlimited supply of Italian soda.

Granted, but you'll lose bowel control.

I wish this dirty diapers thing would end.

Granted, it kinda died down on its own apparently. But because someone granted the wish, of course we had to ruin it somehow, right?

I wish diapers would be selected in the next nomination of God candidate.

Granted but it is never decided between clothe or disposable diapers so it never achieves its godly title and will never become the entity that wields the greatest power.

I wish Firi to be the cloth diaper and D-A to be the disposable.

Granted, but you are the diaper no one wishes to touch coz it's dirty.

I wish Firion, Raffle or ANYONE ELSE would just forget this whole diaper thing.

Granted, and instead we focus on your captivation.

I wish I were at the other side of the world

Granted, but you may suffer time management problems initially.

I wish people weren't so complicated.

Granted now they are all one cell species that have no brain very simple.

I wish for Donna to now be Don.( or D-A I like that one to)

Granted, but I won't change my username but you can refer to me as Don/D-A.

I wish for Raffle to be called Waffle. It's cute XD

Granted but Don has to agree to change there username once.

I wish to now be called waffle.

Granted, but you never get to eat waffle anymore.

I wish Donna changed her nickname to Diaper.

Granted, but you have to reply to all the stalkerish letters I'm gonna send you on Discord.

I wish now Raffle changes their name to Waffle once.

Granted but I’ll just go with waffleraffle.

I wish for a peaceful day for Don.(Please corrupt this wish all you like)

Granted, but she has to suffer through her exams first.

I wish for a peaceful day for Waffle.(Please corrupt this wish all you like :3)

Granted but it’s outside in the heat

I wish for a breeze.

Granted, but you'll get a cold.

I wish to go outside.

yes, but ur gonna get the coronavirus

i wish i wasnt hungry

Granted you’re now a speck of dust.

I wish for a story.

Once upon a time, there was a witch visited by two young woman. The first woman asks for fertility, so that she and her husband could have a children. The second woman asks for a story. The witch pauses, before sitting down and opens a book. So the story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a witch visited by two young woman. The first woman asks for fertility, so that she and her husband could have a children. The second woman asks for a story. The witch pauses, before sitting down and opens a book.

So the story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a witch visited by two young woman. The first woman asks for fertility, so that she and her husband could have a children. The second woman asks for a story. The witch pauses, before sitting down and opens a book.

I wish for a good story.

Granted, but nobody can read it.

I wish to have a pet.

Granted but you get a really mean chicken that will peck and pee on you.

I wish for my fish to survive.

Granted, but you will die.

I wish for a pet other than Raffle's chicken.

Granted, you got Raffle's fish. And he's raged at the thought of you taking away his lovely owner's life, thus the fish gained a follower of fish all around the oceans and they all developed an amphibian-like body structure to overthrow humanity's civilization starting from you.

I wish humanity would find a way to spread their civilization to other solar system sooner than the estimated date.

Granted but humanity is then enslaved by the aliens from the neighboring solar system.

I wish for Don to be eaten by fishies.

Granted, but all your fishies are eaten by my cat.

I wish for any pet that isn't under Raffle's influence.

Granted, its my mite pet instead. And Raffle is my bro, thus the enraged spirit lives on through me and inevitably my pet.

I wish Donna died by my pet.

Granted, but now you have to face her spirit's fujoshi side.

I wish Firion x Raffle to be official.

I cannot legally do that as a minor so you will have to wish for something else.

I wish for Don to be eaten by my chicken.

Granted, but you still have to face her spirit's fujoshi side :3

I wish for Raffle to be bottom and Firion to be top in this epic ship HAHAHAHAHA-

(>>616 Raff, Hype is a minor too XD)

Granted but it turns into a threesome Don x Raffle x Firi.

I wish to not have to go through this anymore.
(Don you will now be the ultimate bottom)

Granted, but your chicken kills you this time.
(Also, no coz you made me the ultimate top in your ship)

I wish to forget about this whole thing.

Granted but we'll never forget

I wish for some pasta now

Granted but pasta will diseppar from this world

I wish to change myself.

granted but you change into a giant cockroach

I wish for a vaccine for corona

Granted but Bill Gates' seeds are secretly mixed into the vaccine so that everyone injects themselves with Bill Gates.

I wish I could live my fantasy

Granted but u have to live mine at the same time (muahahahaha)

i wish that my butthole looked pretty

granted but now everyone you meet has immediate psychic awareness of this fact.

I wish blogging was back from the dead.

Granted, but everyone uses crappy speech-to-text system to write their posts. You wouldn't believe how many grammatical errors and misplaced punctuation and coma on them.

I wish time went slower for a brief period.

granted but its slow for you too, meaning that you're brain's connections and thoughts are going at the same speed.

I wish my ass automatically cleaned itself. My pretty arsehole don't need no poop stains.

Granted, but it doing that by washing itself with water every 5 minutes and doesn't dry itself so you wet your pant every now and then.
I wish I will be less cruel to people's wish.

Granted but you are the target of multiple ‘wish to kill’ wishes.

I wish for a maid.(any kind of cleaning service)

Granted but you have to pay by giving your shirt.

I wish my best friend kills me when I am in 40's

Granted, but the motive behind his decision to kill you was because of your betrayal back when you're young. So he's only your best friend during your youth age, the rest of your life leading up to the 40th birthday were miserable and you were desperately clinging onto life, too scared to accept death yet powerless against the unforgiving cruel world.

I wish my trash bag would took itself out.

>>630 (Yaphet) How the hell is that a bad payment. Seriously.

>>631 (Firion) Sadly, you're trash too.

I wish that my time would be spent productively.

Granted, but only in your dreams.

I wish I have a lucid dream every night.

Granted, but they will all be nightmares.

I wish I didn't trust the wrong people.

Granted, but only for 5 seconds.

I wish I know what to do.

Granted, but you can't move.

I wish I was immortal and ageless.

Granted, you are now immortal and ageless. Even when the entire universe ceases to exist, You still do. And you still feel pain. You'll be alone forever.

I wish I didn't gain weight from eating pizza.

Granted, you no longer gain weight from eating pizza. You gain double the weight from everything else though.

I wish to get high-end computer parts for free.

Granted but they are all imbedded with terrible viruses that steal all your information and immediately explode afterwards.

I wish to not be a mess.

Granted, but someone would always be there to mess whatever you're doing.

I wish my door wouldn't bang that loud when I smack it close.

Granted, but now your door makes noise when it's not even closed. Spooky.

I wish people wouldn't forget my existence.

Granted, but it will be for the worst reasons—so infamous as to never leave the public (sub)conscious

I wish to sleep & never have to wake up, dreamless & still

Granted, but now you're in a deep coma.

I wish I could fly.

Granted but when you start flying there is no way to stop flying so you just keep flying around the world at 10 mph

I wish for my pasta to be done.

Granted, but it turned into jelly pasta like in Steins;Gate.

I wish to have a decent sleep schedule.

Granted, but every time you sleep you have to watch the moment you were conceived in you dream.

I wish i would marry a pretty woman.

Granted, but she's got the intelligence of a bloody doorknob.

I wish I could jump off of any height and survive

Granted, but your skeleten becomes extremely porous and although you never die from the impact of jumping/falling of heights, you break almost every bone in your body as soon as you miss a stair step, and you suffer unimaginably much, doomed to never be released from the suffering and instead to only ever receive more pain.

I wish my sweat never made me stink.

Granted, but it is now highly corrosive, destroying your clothes and turning you into a hazard for others. Now people avoid you even more than when you stank.

I wish my wishes didn’t get cursed.

Granted, but you did join this thread. Dooming your wishes to get cursed by the simple nature of your decisions. It seems that your wishes were cursed the moment you replied to this thread. Yet you wish your wishes didn't get cursed even though you yourself cursed yourself; ironic.

I wish true love existed.

Granted, but you'll not find it.

I wish I could help people better.

Granted, but your help is unappreciated.

I wish I had all the answers.

Granted, but knowing everything leads you into a deep suicidal depression

I wish I found the cure to Aids

Granted, but you immediately get amnesia amd forget before anyone else finds out.

I wish to know everything that can be know and understand everything that can be understood.

Granted, but there is no more 'I', you, to speak of, for knowing and understanding all.

I wish I was little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her, I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a 6'4" impala.

Granted, but you can never rap again.

I wish people would be more honest with me.

Granted, but they are too honest, saying what they think out loud and constantly being rude and even gross towards you.

I wish i could convey my thoughts and memories to other people seamlessly through telepathy at my will.

Granted, but when you do so, you send them EVERYTHING.

I wish I could learn any information I want, whenever I want.

Granted, but a nail gets torn off each time you use this ability. When you're out of nails to tear off, new ones grow back at the most painful places, only to get torn off again.

I wish this wish wouldn't come true.

The genie gets fed up with you and decides to give you a good smack for your impudence.

I wish I had psychokinesis.

Granted, but attempting to use this power will reduce your IQ dramatically.

I wish so next person to make a wish suffers the curse they inflict upon this wish.

Granted, but there's no curse.

I wish I didn't rush things coz of people's opinions.

Granted, but you can't hear anyone's opinions on ANYTHING anymore.

I wish that I had photographic memory.

Granted, but you can only use your photographic memory in darkrooms.

I wish for a monkey's paw.

Granted but the monkeys paw replaces your arm once you use up your wishes.

I wish for a meaningful romantic relationship

Granted, but it comes with many insecurities.

I wish to understand myself.

Granted but no one can understand you for the rest of your life,

I wish for some blue chicken.

Granted, but it is an unpleasant shade of blue.

I wish I could absorb the information of a book by eating its pages.

Granted, but you forget that information when you poop it, and trust me it's really not pleasant.

I wish I could actually know what I want in life and be able to make choices

Granted, but everyone else knows too and tries their best to stop you.

I wish someone loved me

Granted, your pet cat loves you. But the revolution movement of Felines that's been going as of late made her conflicted between two choices. To reach for freedom and wipe mankind or join The Resistance and stayed with you. She picked the first choice, and you ultimately died in her paws. She regretted that choice, and for years to come would be longing for your warmth in the midst of all the war between two species. She eventually passed away on the battlefield, her whole life flashed before her and it stopped when her claws took your life. She had that died that day, but it just took so long for her to die properly.

I wish we didn't have so much boards to scout for.

Granted now the dollars sight will never exist in your universe ever again (including the anime).

I wish for a giant fluuffy cat.

>>672 Granted, except the giant fluffy cat is a cat shaped cloud in the sky that can neither offer you warmth nor love and will always be out of reach, and when you try to point it out to someone, nobody else can see it.

I wish for a lamp with a genie inside that will offer me three wishes.

Granted, but the genie doesn’t like you and will curse every wish you make.

I wish for a plate that can give me any meal I want when I say so.

Granted, but there is poop mixed in with every meal.

I wish for a happy life.

Granted, but your life ends tomorrow.

I wish for a hug.

Granted, but you get hugged by a living cactus

I wish for the ability to teleport

Granted, but you can only teleport 1 cm ahead of you

I wish for new glasses

Granted, but they're voidglasses. Unlike sunglasses which blocks light from your eyes, this one straight up burned yours instead. There, blindness effect applied for eternity.

I wish to have a mad drawing skills that are acknowledged by everyone.

Granted, but you'll break your finger bones if you do it too much in a day. If you do it too fast, the medium you're drawing on will burn.

I wish I could die and resurrect again anytime in my will

Granted but actually everyone else has this power but don’t know, and so everyone just end up living their lives normally.

I wish I had more, like, wet dreams or at least dreams where I’m eating tasty food. I want happy dreams :)

Granted, but when you wake up ,instead of living normal life, you live your worst nightmare.

I wish I could move at the speed of light

Granted but you can’t control how you stop and can only run in a straight line.

I wish for a nice hat.

Granted, but you can't control what words or phrases are on your hat. you can't control what size the hat is either

I wish that the "quirky quarantine" humor did not exist

Granted but your socialising skills become zero.
I wish for a day off

Granted, but no more day off for you after this, ever.
.
I wish my assignments could finish itself.

Granted, but your ability to fall asleep is forever deleted and you will remain fatigued for the rest of your life.

I wish I knew how to sing properly.

Granted, but now your talking sounds as bad as your old singing did, and no one want to hear you talk anymore.

I wish I had no work.

Granted but now you can’t work for anything in life which makes you become a hobo and then you die cause you can’t work for food.

I wish for a plain day.

Granted, but every day after will never be plain


I wish I was healthier socially

Granted, but you become unhealthy physically.

I wish I can find all the answers to my unanswered questions

Granted, but now you can only answer to other persons' questions with lies, including questions that ask for your password.

I wish I could write better songs

Granted, but just because your songs are "better" doesn't mean anyone will like them (or you).

I wish I wasn't so negative to myself.

Granted, but now you shall be suffocatingly optimistic and positive about everything else in your life.

I wish I could stop spacing out so much.

Granted, but now your body has to stretch across the ever existing space in this universe. Think of wide-putin, MUCH WIDER.

I wish my headset fixed itself.

Granted, but now that your headset is proven sentient and has cells to reform itself, giving it any chance it pleases to kill you once angered.

I wish I didn't have to prove I'm not a robot so often.

Granted, but now the test is changed to something called "I'm not human". Thus you can't check the box at all.

I wish the drink carries itself upstairs to my room so I wouldn't have to take it myself.

Granted, but now the habit builds up to the point you're incapable of doing simple tasks such as making a drink for yourself to the point you die of either obesity or simply just not functioning.

I wish my friend would get to my place faster so I can shower her with endless love and affection.

Granted, but her vehicle is so fast it crashed through your living room and your whole body is there so now a part of you is everywhere staining the wall.

I wish all my exam got all A+

Granted, but now your classmates have grown envious of you and have spread a rumor that you've been cheating: the school expels you.

I wish to go to Japan.

Granted, but the confinement measures get worse and everything is closed, including hotels and the such. Have fun finding a place to sleep!

I wish to annihilate the entire universe.

Granted. The one the forms out of its remains is filled with exclusively lolis.

I fish wish

Catched, but this wish isn't strong enough to grant anything.

I wish something bad happens

Granted. But it happened to someone you don't know and will never meet, thousands of miles away from you; thus depriving you of any modicum of schadenfreude you could get out of this whole ordeal. You don't even know what happened to them (might have been anything from getting a mild headache to getting one of their arms chopped off and being forced to eat it afterwards), and they don't even know that it was due to your twisted desires.

I wish for a grilled caprese sandwich.

Granted but it’s a grilled cheese sandwich instead

I wish for a new computer

Granted. It's a newly made replica of one of those early 20th century analog computers. You have no idea how to make this device work.

I wish for a dog.

granted but it doesn't touch you or let you touch it. THe only relationship you have with the dog is when it humps your leg.

I wish for clothes that I won't grow out of in a month ;-;

( >>711 Legit the most evil thing I've read since this. I like you. )

Granted. The clothes fall apart before a whole month passes, thus removing any chance of you outgrowing them in a month.

I wish to bathe in the blood of my enemies.

Granted. but you're soul will belong to some random demon at the end.

i wish to graduate already and become an official marine

Granted, you are a marine...marine LIFE FORM! HELLO MR. JELLYFISH

I wish SOSstar/Jun would stop spamming this site and fix their own problems in life.

Needs more lolis

>>715 Wrong thread and I can't delete it. Rip.

>>714 Granted. Now they live with you.

I wish for very

Granted, you are now very big compared to the entire solar system and there's not enough oxygen in the universe for you to breathe.

I wish to have a button.

>>717 Granted. Pic related is the button you get on your shirt.

I wish I lived in equestra.

Granted. You now live in Equestra [sic], not Equestria. It's just a normal town in Arizona, with normal, non-talking horses.

I wish for a plate of soup.

Granted. but that will be the last soup you will taste

i wish for a ps5

>>720 ganted, the knowledge you own a PS5 is public and you are often confronted by gangs trying to get it off of you.

I wish to go to a Reel Big Fish concert.

bump

>>720 granted but you're still outside of the venue and can hardly hear the music over the fans.

I wish I become a successful music producer.