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Looking for Fallout beta-readers! (1)

1 Name: Acalypha !njdgZOCOjI : 2019-07-01 06:17 ID:5Upht6zo [Del]

I'm working on several Fallout fanfics, and I'm looking for beta readers to look over my work! If you're interested after reading this, please e-mail me at Praelias@outlook.com.

Here are summaries of each story, and below, a sample of my writing - from later in one of the stories.

Children of the Vault
Beneath Boston's Malden Middle School lies Vault 75; a vault designed to improve the human gene pool, and one with a dark secret: child experimentation. Alma Lancaster, one of the children of the vault, along with her companions and brother, uncover the repulsive truth behind the experiments they've been subjected to, and plot a revolt against the research staff. Will they survive?

Beyond the Vault (a spin-off to COTV)
Margaret Fox craves revenge on her former Overseer, William Hayes, who's fled to Capital Wasteland. She seeks out a mercenary from the area named MacCready, who she hopes can help her navigate the foreign territory. During their travels, she learns of his troubles with the Gunners and his son, and helps him with both - all while fleeing the Institute, who's after Margaret's head.

Snake Charmer
Benny panics while fleeing the Strip and asks for help from a local, trusted barkeep named Vera - who he quickly realizes is not who she claims to be. If Caesar doesn't kill them, her past just might.

Here's a snippet in an upcoming chapter of Beyond the Vault. It's a work in progress, but I feel like it's one of the most emotional chapters in the story thus far - at least, that's what I'm aiming for.

The Third Rail, as usual, was full of people, smoke, and noise. Nearly every person there had a beer, and for once, that included Margo. MacCready was two seats down, and between them, a young woman. She was young, beautiful, and blonde. She had air about her that demanded respect and authority, and while she'd been cold initially, she very quickly became a friend to both MacCready and Margo.

MacCready was enamored with her.

Margo knew she should have been happy for him. After Lucy, it had taken him years to find someone new; she knew how hard it had been for him to open up to this woman. To allow himself to care for her, and work through the guilt of finding someone new after his wife had died so brutally.

Truthfully, there was nothing wrong with Xara; she was a wonderful woman. She worked with the NCR as a mechanic, and she'd gotten cars running. Only a few, and it took years to figure out, but she'd done it. She was smart. Strong. Elegant. Brave.

"Margo?"

MacCready's voice pulled her from her thoughts. He and Xara were both watching her, confusion in her eyes, and concern in his.

She forced a smile. "Sorry, what?"

Xara glanced to MacCready before her eyes settled on Margo again. "We were going to head back to my place to eat. Did you want to come?"

Margo knew she had no reason to dislike the woman. And she didn't, really; she just hated that she was with him. "You know, um," she paused to rub the back of her neck, averting her gaze, "I actually have to leave early with James in the morning, so I should probably get going." The young woman offered another feeble smile to the couple before standing, grabbing her duster, and quickly making her way toward the exit.

The pair exchanged a glance before MacCready squeezed his companion's shoulder. "I should go check on her. I'll meet you at the house." Without waiting for a response, he followed his employer up the stairs, out the door, and down an alley leading toward her apartment. "Margo!"

She hadn't expected him to follow, and that was made clear when she turned to face him. Surprise, sadness, and anger all fought for dominance over her countenance. "Mac?" Her brows knitted together. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to know what the hel- heck, is going on with you," he demanded, closing the remaining distance between them. It was clear by his demeanor that he was frustrated. Angry, even. "You've been distant lately, and ever since Xara came with us, and ever since she and I got serious, you've been real moody. You wanna tell me what your deal is?"

"It's nothing, Mac," Margo insisted. "I've just had a lot on my mind. You should go back to Xara's and eat; we've been busy all day and neither of us had time to."

"Not until I know what's going on," he countered. "And don't tell me it's nothing, because I'm not stupid enough to buy that."

"Then will you accept that it's not your business?" She quipped.

He huffed and jabbed a finger toward her. "See? That's exactly what I mean! Every little thing sets you off, Margo, and I'm just trying to see what's wrong. I still have to travel with you, and I don't want to deal with your mood swings all day, every day."

"Maybe you should find another employer then, Mac." It hurt to say it, and she didn't mean it, but the words tumbled from her lips before she could stop them and she immediately regretted it.

MacCready blinked in surprise, clearly taken aback by her words. "You don't mean that, Margo." Even with how she was acting, he could still see she hadn't meant what she'd said.

"Don't I?" She sighed and removed the bullet from around her neck, holding it out to him. "You still have yours, right? You don't need it anymore."

His face contorted with a mixture of emotions. Anger, at the fact that she was really trying to get rid of him. Sadness. Hurt. Frustration. Confusion, because he couldn't figure out why. Surprise, because he hadn't seen this coming. Not in a million years. "Margo," he said softly, "you need to tell me what's going on."

"I don't need to tell you anything, MacCready!" She snapped. "Hiring you was a mistake; I should have never hunted you down, and I definitely shouldn't have gotten close to you."

That stung, and this time his anger got the better of him. "Oh, shut up!" He snapped, taking a step forward. "You're being ridiculous, Margo, and it's pissing me off!" He moved forward again, getting in her face. "Tell me what the hell you're doing! Because you don't abandon people!" He paused, the realization clicking. "Is it Xara?" Another pause, the cogs in his brain beginning to turn. "What's wrong with her?" And again, anger set in. "That's what all this is about, isn't it?"

Margo remained silent, glowering at the man before her.

"Talk to me, Margo!" He barked. "Tell me what's wrong!"

"She's not me!"

They stood in silence for several moments, each equally stunned by her statement. Margo was surprised that she'd said it, and MacCready was surprised by what it meant. She had feelings for him. Strong ones, apparently, and she'd been keeping them to herself for what he assumed was some time now.

"She's not me," Margo repeated, softer this time. "And she'll never be me." Her gaze shifted back up to MacCready's eyes, a mix of hurt and sadness in them. "Is that what you wanted to hear, Mac? Are you satisfied?"