1 Name: Jisatsu Furiku : 2016-02-02 19:05 ID:vNOlyRqS [Del]
Okay, so... I have a short story due this Thursday and its going to be about this girl (Piper) who falls in love with this possessive ghost (Daniel)who had committed suicide by jumping off a bridge not far from her house and is now stuck in the house. She, at first, is afraid of him but soon falls in love with the boy. She becomes extremely obsessed with Daniel and Daniel becomes possessive of her. She becomes afraid though when he asks her to kill herself so that way they can be together forever. She then tells her mom everything that had happened. Her mom, thinking she was schizophrenic, gets her all the correct meds but nothing works. Piper, still being in love with Daniel, doesn't mind that much and loves the time she spends with him. Though it becomes to much for Piper when Daniel won't stop begging her to commit suicide so they can be together. She gets upset and yells at him to leave and never come back, that she doesn't love him anymore... He does just that and Piper forever regrets it after because she never stops loving him.
Should I just stick with this? Or is it to dark? Can someone give me some ideas please??
2 Name: Shiranui!b2B0SQa8Xw : 2016-02-02 20:25 ID:8CdkisPN [Del]
Even if you don't pass that in for school, I really encourage you to finish it and post it here. This really does sounds quite interesting. I've never actually heard of an idea like this, mainly because I'm not really into the genre.
Whether you should pass it in or not really depends on how far you are into the story. If you already have started writing it, you should use it. It'll be much better than anything you could conjure up in a day. As for the subject matter, I've heard people writing about suicides since middle school. Usually, the teachers are fine with it.
3 Name: Kuudere : 2016-02-03 01:07 ID:4bo1IGII [Del]
Flaw in your story: how can Daniel leave? He's stuck in the house! Ok, I'm a bit confused with this part so please explain what happened with Daniel in the end. I mean, he's stuck in the house, right? So basically if Piper regretted that decision all she needed to do was find Daniel who was living somewhere in the house. Anyways, I don't think it's too dark at all! It's pretty good, although if you're going to keep the ending, I would suggest something happening that lets Daniel break the curse (you know, being stuck in the house and all). That way, it would make sense how Daniel is leaving the house forever.
