Before I even say anything else, let me just say I left my name out for a reason. I want to stay anonymous in this. Yes, I'm a regular here and you could figure out who I am by my ID (I think), but please don't, and please don't ask.

Alrighty, now to the issue at hand. I'm horribly (and clinically) depressed, and have been for a couple years now. It's making my life so hard, and I can't function normally anymore. I want out of this. How horrible I feel all the time, the terrible thoughts in my head. I want it all to just go away.
The way I see it, there are two ways to escape depression: finding a way to get better (therapy, treatment, etc.), or suicide. And for me right now, it could go either way. I hate myself and I want to die, but I'm still too afraid to actually go for it and pull the trigger because I'm a wimp and I'm scared it'll hurt.

So, ah, advice? Ideas for treatment so I can rise out of my depression, excellent foolproof suicide methods, or just really good ways to cope would all be appreciated.

Suicide is one bad shit, But think it over again, you're just giving up on a special gift that was given to you, LIFE, God gave us this special gift that no one can replace, You can't buy it with money, We were made to have a purpose in this world that no one but us can do, likely if we kill our selves off, It's giving up on that sole purpose that was went for us...So in my way...I would find for a goal to reach, give it all I've got on life, Go beyond my Limits and expectations, and Live my life to the fullest, Until the right time comes for me to rest...Advices.....Only Advices

I know that feeling. Back in November I almost took my own life. Before that, back in September 2010. The only thing that saved me was thought of what I would be throwing away.

Everyone who is born, who makes it through this world, has a purpose that only they can fulfill. And in order to fulfill that purpose you need to be all that you can. You need to fight the negative feelings inside you, and that means getting help.

For the longest time I was opposed. I thought that by needing a psychiatrist, by needing medication, it made me weak. But eventually I had to seek the care of a mental facility. I was put on medication for severe depression. It helped immensely; it allowed me to feel happy again.

However, once the depression subsided, the true root of the problem was uncovered. It turned out that for the longest time I was suffering from bipolar disorder and never knew. They changed my medication, and I've had no problems since then.

Help is out there. If you feel like you are on the edge, call a hotline and they will help you. They will give you the resources to get therapy and to get medicated if necessary.

You have my support and prayer.

Yo. You sound like me in about five years.
Abusive family, schizophrenic, shit like that.

My way to deal with life is to smile.

Honestly. Studies show that if you smile, even if its a really fake smile, youll start to feel better.

Smile a little more. :)

I despise you for your distrust in us.
I do not have an answer to your question though.
I suggest suicide hotline, therapist, and i believe theres big meeting for these kinds of things

>>1 I know how you feel...

First of all: if you can, avoid dealing with the problem by yourself or just with people on the internet, if you can talk to your friends or family.
If that's not possible, therapy is the best option.
If you cannot do that either (because you wouldn't want to talk to some stranger or you cannot afford it) I suggest trying to find something that motivates you. Try doing a bucketlist with some really great things or just common, but something that gives you a reason, even if it's just a stupid reason, for wanting to live for at least another day.
Do a bucketlist with about 100 things. When you finish all of them, do a new one.

Skydive with no parachute. There's your fool proof method of committing if you're serious.

Otherwise, find some people worth living for. I did, and it stopped me from going over the deep end my Freshman year (medium-length story).

>>3 This. All of it.
>>7 Also this.
>>8 Back half of this.

Those pretty much say everything I can think to say at the moment, just wanted to pop in and let you know that I read this and thought about you as well, Anon ^_^

Sorry, but this post is gonna be really long. I'm just really grateful to everyone who was kind enough to take notice and post here.

>>2 Sorry, but I don't believe in God. And I don't believe that we have a predetermined destiny or purpose to fulfill in life. But I really appreciate what you said about every life being worth something, and taking advantage of what you are lucky enough to have.

>>3 Thank you. So much. It means more than I can say to hear from someone who knows exactly what I'm going through—I'm even pretty sure I'm also bipolar. Though I've never been diagnosed or anything. Anyway, thank you for sharing your story with me; it's helped me to see that maybe I'm not in as hopeless of a situation as I had thought, and it's given me hope.

>>4 :) I smile all the time; in fact, I'm known for my constant good humor. It's ironic really.
By the by, I never knew you were schizophrenic.

>>5 I'm really sorry. It's not that I don't trust you guys, I'm just hesitant to reveal who I am. Please try to understand: I've never, ever told anyone, here or in real life, and I'm not certain that I want to start telling people now. So please, don't take my anonymity the wrong way. I don't distrust you in the slightest.

>>6 It's really nice to know that I'm not alone. I hope that this thread will possibly benefit you and others that are suffering in the same way. ^_^

>>7 That's a really good point, about getting real help. I've been trying for ages to get the nerve to tell someone and to get help, but I'm just too afraid at present.
That bucket list is a great idea though; I think I shall try it. It's always nice to find something to keep you going.

>>8 XD I really would do so in a heartbeat, but I'm too young~ :(
And I'd like to hear that story sometime, if you'd ever care to share it with me.

>>9 Thanks so much for just being kind enough to stop in on this thread and post~

And to everyone who posted here or even just read the thread, it means the world to me that you guys would be so kind. I love you all~~

im not sure if this would help but try anime XD i know it sounds silly but theres lots of animes that help me with things in life so i thought i might share this idea...

I know life can be difficult, it can put you in the most difficult experiences, and yes sometimes seems like there's no light. But I also know that life can surprise us. Can make us feel terrible, but can make us feel well and warm. And bring people to create a new reason for living. So don't give up, cuz I'm pretty sure you'll appear in someone life and give to it a new reason to live.

>>11 Sometimes when i feel depressed or i had a bad day i always watch anime or anime movies those really helped me. Hang in there Anonymous, DONT GIVE UP ON YOURSELF :I

Bump

Like I 've said before in some other posts, i was in a similar situation. What helped me the most was the anime Full Moon wo Sagashite. I would have commited suicide over 2 years ago for sure if I hadn't been convinced to watch it (it was my first anime/manga ever), just for no reason, since my friends didn't and still know about it. It gave me hope and courage and made me see what I would be missing out on. I wouldn't be able to see my niece or my second niece who is due to be born any day now. I made me see what I had to live for, and now I could never kill myself. Sure, I stil get depressed a lot, but suicide isn't an option for me, and it should't be for anyone else. Just remember that no matter what, you will always have us here too, even if we've never met in person. I wish we all could sometime though :)

hey loves, i know this is a really old thread but i feel like i owe it to you guys to tell you.... this was me :0 wanna hear the resolution to my story?
december of that year i admitted that i was planning to kill myself with some pills. i had to go to the mental wing of the hospital for a couple weeks, and my life was shit after i went home. i've been on a cycle of meds since then... and my official diagnosis is anxiety, severe depression, adhd, and a bit of ocd. so yeah it's shit.
right now i'm doing somewhat better, but i have my ups and downs. mostly downs.
i'm taking action for myself now though, i'm going to move away from my verbally abusive mother......

sorry i didn't say who i was earlier. i love you guys<3