Because I messed up.

Make wishes.

Grant and corrupt wishes.

Simple.

I wish for things.

>>1 Ahem first wish corrupt :3 Granted. These things are all heavy objects that are falling from the sky, you inevitably get in the head with one of them, suffer massive head trauma and die.

I wish for cotton candy.

>>2 Granted. You get cotton candy after we sex.

I fish wish Nene.

>>1 Granted, but the things you got weren't the things you wanted.

I wish... more than anything... more than life... more than jewels...
I wish... more than life...
I wish...
More than anything...
More than the moon...
I wish..
... the King is giving a Festival.
More than life..
I wish..
I wish to go to the Festival--
More than riches...
--and the Ball...
I wish my cow would give us some milk.
More than anything..
I wish we had a child.
Please, pal--
I want a child...
Squeeze, pal...
I wish to go to the Festival.
I wish you'd give us some milk or even cheese...
I wish we might have a child.
I wish..
You wish to go to the Festival?
You, Cinderella, the Festival? You wish to go to the Festival?
What, you, Cinderella, the Festival? The Festival?!
What, you wish to go to the Festival?!
The Festival?! THE KING'S FESTIVAL???!!!
THE FESTIVAL???!!!
Look at your nails!
Look at your dress!
People would laugh at you--
Nevertheless--I still wish to go to the Festival./You still wish to go to the Festival--/She still wants to go to the Festival--
--And dance before the Prince?!
I wish..
I wish my son were not a fool.
I wish my house was not a mess.
I wish the cow was full of milk.
I wish the walls were full of gold--
I wish a lot of things..
You foolish child! What in heaven's name are you doing with the cow inside the house?
A warm environment might be just what Milky White needs to produce his milk.
It's a she! How many times do I have to tell you? Only "she"s can give milk.
Why, come in, little girl.
I wish..
It's not for me,
It's for my granny in the woods.
A loaf of bread, please--
To bring my poor old hungry
Granny in the woods...
Just a loaf of bread, please...
I have emptied a pot of lentils into the ashes for you. If you have picked them out again in two hours' time, you shall go to the ball with us.
And perhaps a sticky bun?... Or four?...

>>2 >>3 Ninja'd, but granted, I took forevers.

>>4 O.O epic.
Granted. You get everything you wished for at the cost of one year of your life per wish.

I wish for sleep.

>>3 Granted. You are still poisoned.

>>6 Granted. It comes in two hours.

I fish wish Nene.

>>8 Dammit, Name. Ninja'd me.

Granted, This Nene holds a fish, and hugs you, suddenly the fish was actually a knife, stabbing you in the head. DEAD.

I wish to get a PS4

>>10 Granted. It explodes, killing everyone you love.

I fish wish Nene.

>>10 Awesome :3
>>11 Granted. You're starting to notice that I wasn't kidding when I said you were poisoned.

I wish a random wish.

>>12 Granted. You are sexed.

I fish wish Nene.

>>13 Granted. You drown, I have no recollection as to how and why that happened.

I wish for sleep to come neow.

>>14 Granted. /cuddle

I fish wish Nene.

>>15 Granted. You're covered with fish scales and I laugh.

I wish I could sing better in Japanese.

>>16 Granted. You get sexed by a Japanese person.

I fish wish Nene.

>>17 Granted, more stabbings for you.

I wish to get this damn spirit to stop haunting me.

>>19 Granted. A cat follows you everywhere. It slowly evolves into a horrifying monster that kills you with one swipe of its paw.

I fish wish Nene.

>>20 I throw a fish at you and run away.

I wish for a new knife collection.

>>21 Granted. You stole a knife from my sister. You meet with a terrible fate.

I fish wish Nene.

>>22 Granted. I drown you then feed you to my sharkys.

I wish to not sleep in tomorrow morning.

>>23 Granted. I wake you up by sexing you.

I wish for a original wish.

*an

>>25 Granted.

I wish for Nene to go to six flags when I do.

>>27 Granted.
You both arrive at six flags early, your parents mini van runs better in the crisp morning air anyways.

As you head towards the security officers at the gate you notice that there isn't many people there today.
'Ah, now is the perfect time for me to fish nene, if you get what I mean, which I do because I'm talking to myself.' You think, darting your eyes quickly over your date.

You get through security with out much trouble, though you realize that Neko did giggle and blush during the pat down.
'Oh man. So penis envy.' You cry inside.

After you guys ride some of the smaller rides you notice that there isn't a line for your favorite thrill ride of your young life: The Six Fags Butt Destroyer.
'So hard core it will literally turn your rectum inside out.'
You feel a slight tingle in your basketball shorts.
You grab Neko's hand, an event that you would remember forever if your trip didn't turn out as bad as it did, running as fast as your sandals could take you.
'Yes, no line. Now is fish tiem.'
You guys pick the car up front, you want every inch of her body to be afraid so you can nurture her like a child.
You're weird, it gets you mad "interested."

The roller coaster starts to take off, the machine hissing loudly, it's heading towards a steep hill.
You're both smiling, this is the happiest you've ever felt.
You could die right now and not regret a single thing.
'I could die right now and I wouldn't regret a single thing.'
You repeat because you're gay.

As your cart reaches the top of the hill you wrap your arm around Neko. For a few moments that seem like hours you can see the entire city. It's beautiful.
The climax of the hill and all the great things you feel brings that tickle back, only this time.
It's a climax of your own.

"Oh my god. Did you just fucking cum in your pants? You fucking pervert. Oh my. Fucking sick. Get the fuck off of me." She screams, shoving your arm away from her.
"No, it's just, I really like Six Fags, and..uh...and beautiful moments, I feel something magical and..." You try to explain, being cut off by a horrible grinding sound.

Your eyes open slowly to the site of torn metal and smoke.
You can't remember much, except screaming.
You can smell blood and something burning.

You shake off the dizzy feeling and look around.
You see Neko, impaled through the gut on a metal rod.
She's bleeding and gurgling that she hates you or something.
She's past the point of shock and it's not making much sense.
You want to comfort her, you try to stand.

You can't feel your legs.
Because you are splint in half.
Your Six Flags Adventure was almost everything you wished for.
The end.

>>28 Max level of corruption reached.

>>29 I wish more people were better at the corruption game. :'((((((((
TFW no one on ur lebel

Serious wish though...

I wish that alcohol was never invented.
Have fun with this one guiez.

>>28 What did I just read?

>>32 I write BBS fan fiction.
Don't derail the thread, Name!

>>30 Granted, Alcohol never existed. The 1st maker of alcohol instead made another type of, well I wouldn't say drink, but people got extremely high off this type of strange fluid. It made it so people even go crazy, craving that smell for more. Someone introduces it to you, you had no idea what it was. You sniff it, and become addicted to it. You try to stop, because you posted about alcohol never being invented. You then post on the Personal board about the problem you have, no one has any idea. You now suffer from this drug. You should've just wished that any type of drug/alcohol was invented instead. You die at a beautifully young age.

I wish I could think of better things, like Chreggome here.

----

>>34 Granted.

But you realize shortly that it's not a gift, but a curse.
You start hearing voices in your head, their hushed tones are in languages long dead to this world.
You start to feel restless, you stop focusing on anything but the voices.
You leave home, wander the country on foot.
Resting where only when you physically can't go on any more.

Eventually you find yourself in the middle of the woods.
You like it here.
Here the voices don't seem to be so pushy with what they want you to write down.
Your fingers stop twitching, you can sleep.
You live out the life of a lone woodsmen for twenty five years.
For twenty five beautiful years you haven't been hearing the voices.

You have a pretty self sustainable farm now, your needs are met.
You feel like you've escaped from some dreadful truth in the universe.

But, one must always remember that the truth has a way of coming out regardless of how far you run, how well you hide, how much you believe you've escaped.

One night, nestled in your warm bed of animal furs, you wake suddenly with a searing pain in your head.
You can hear one voice.
A voice so loud that it seems as if it could shatter your skull like a cheap wine glass.
Your brains staining the carpet, but not half as bad as the wine would.

The voice demands only one thing of you.
"There can be only one."
Your head fills with images a sweet highlander battle between you and I.
You know what must be done.

When you kick in my door you see me sitting in a chair with a gun in my hand.
"Finally, they got someone else to do this job."
I blow my brains out.

You are surrounded by a warm, bright light.
A being made of an even brighter light floats towards you.
"You are the new Story Teller.
The weaver of universes, the speaker of untold truth, librarian of forgot knowledge. You are a god."

The voices never stop, you never stop slammin' it hard style with wicked jokes and fan fictions. You start smoking.
You get lung cancer.
You die a moderate death.
There isn't much pain, you weren't too young or too old.
You died with dignity, people would say.

The sad part of the story is that second you took your last breath, you were the happiest you were in years.
The voices and constant awesomeness made your life a constant roller coaster, you see I'm making a reference to Name's death here. You were never really unhappy...but you were only really happy when it was over.


I wish that the whole "women's rights" thing never happened.

>>28 Epic.
>>36 Granted. Woman's rights never existed and thus, women have no rights today.
Every man has an adorable house wife who greats them everyday from work with a smile and kiss dressed in frilly aprons. Women are not allowed to work and thus can do about as much as house pets can.
Neko stares out of her window as she waits for her husband to return home, she grinds her teeth in anger at how the world has turned out, she wanted greatness and a career not baking and cleaning. Turns out her husband had appreciated her festering thoughts of hatred and twisted mind, and she loved him for it,
He'd come home from work and be greeted like any other husband. After the evening together Neko and him would sneak off in the dark to a secret lab where he let her tinker away with things no one should touch.
Neko believed the world was suited for the two of them alone and consequentially her work was towards that goal.
Ultimately Neko's work results in chaos and the downfall of everything. Congratulations, you took part in the destruction of everything.

I wish for secret lab.

>>37 Granted. I'm the guy in your corrupt.

I wish Nene would post her picture in the stalker thread.

granted, turns out shes a he n all those fanfics you made are wrong n you get so disturbed you take an axe to your computer in hopes of forgetting the awful deed you have commited.


i wish taquitos werent 80% shell

>>39 Granted. They're 100% shell.

I fish wish Nene.

>>39 granted. They're 90% shell.

I wish ninja turtles would make a comeback into pop culture

>>40 dammit. I have been what is known as "ninja'd".

Well shit.

>>40 Granted, after many times you've done this, your wish has expired.
>>41 Granted, they're introduced to drugs, yet they didn't know. They're no longer Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, they're now known as the...Fuck even I don't know, nor want to know.

I wish the internets to be better.

>>43 Granted. Everyone gets ten yottabytes per second, both download and upload.

I fish wish Nene.

>>44 Granted. I push you into my shark infested pool.

I wish for candy.

>>45 Granted. The candy has my cum in it.

I fish wish Nene.

>>46 Granted. I had seafood and didn't share.

I wish stairs were kinder to Neko.

>>47 Granted. You are able to easily go up stairs two at a time, like I do, at the cost of sexing me every day.

I fish wish Nene.

>>48 Granted. The only food left on earth is fish, you're forced to eat nothing but fish. After awhile you get terribly sick of it although Nene is happy.

I wish to not be scared of falling down stairs.

>>49 Granted. You are now scared of falling up them, which hurts more than falling down them. I know from experience.

I wish Nene and I had teleporters between our houses.

>>50 Granted. Neko tries to teleport but is sent to an alternate dimension instead.

I wish for something chaotic.

>>51 Granted! You find that your favorite item of clothing now has a rip in it that cannot be fixed. You go nude on your next outing, which leads to a series of (~~~chaotic~~~) events.

I wish for cool things. As in, things that are slightly below average temperature but not quite cold enough to be discomforting.

>>52 Granted. You get a glass of cool water. This is the last water that you will ever enjoy. You must savour all of it to the fullest.

I wish to become justice.

>>53 Granted. Batwoman.

I fish wish Nene.

Name, please.
Please stop.
You're taking all the fun out of this thread.

>>54 Granted. You suffer from organ failure due to arsenic poisoning.

I wish I wasn't so tired.

>>56 Granted, you've been injected with caffeine. You're now addicted of injecting stuff into you. You inject poison on accident because it looked like caffeine. R.I.P.

I wish for a dish that doesn't contain a fish, but with a...glish...

>>58 Granted. It does contain rotten bananas and bull nuts.

I fish wish Nene.

>>59 Granted. Nene gives you a fish, this fish has a nice little heat activated bomb nicely implanted inside. When the bomb reaches 98.6 degrees it explodes, you die shortly after ingesting it.

I wish that I lived in the nineteenth century where I could wear pretty dresses and chivalry still existed.

>>60 Granted. I am your knight.

I fish wish Nene.

>>61 How is that even corrupting her wish?

Granted. She turns into a whale, landing on you and crushing you do death.

I wish I could get paid but not work.

>>62 Granted. The money is fake.

I fish wish Nene.

>>63 Granted. You go fishing and get eaten by a bear, Nene witnessed it.

I wish I was a race car driver.

>>64 Granted. You win every race, but you are unable to race unless we sex every night.

I fish wish Nene.

>>65 Granted. You drown in the ocean.

I wish for candy.

>>66 Granted. It's a candy that makes you cute at the expense of six inches.

I fish wish Nene.

>>67 Granted. Nene chokes you with a raw fish.

I wish for destruction.

>>68 Granted. The Earth explodes, leaving only tiny chunks, each one having about as much oxygen as the top of Mount Everest. Our chunks merge after about ten minutes.

I fish wish Nene.

>>69 Granted. I had sushi without you.

I wish for chocolate.

>>70 Granted. To get it, we have to sex, but afterward, you get infinite chocolate.

I fish wish Nene.

20 times Name.
You're being a major faggot again.
This is why you don't get laid, bruh.

That and the gloves, the gloves probably have something to do with it.

I wish that I was a movie actor.

>>72 The reason I don't is because I'm waiting until I'm married.

>>73 well you sure as hell dont act like it.

>>74 I'm pervy, yes, but I only act so online, being straight out annoying instead of pervy in real life.

>>72 Granted, you're now a movie actor. A FAMOUS movie actor, so much so that you have millions of teenage girls (and some boys) drawing you, writing smut, asking about your personal life, following you wherever you go, and taking your pictures. And even if there is a remote chance you could hook up with someone, they get angry and spew the hate so you're forever alone but yet surrounded by annoying teenagers.

I wish my internet friends were my friends irl.

>>76 Granted. Many of them rape you.

I fish wish Nene.

>>77 Granted. I steal your fish army.

I wish to go to an ice cream parlour.

>>79 Granted. It's burnt and gross.

I wish for some Starbucks.

>>80 Granted. It costs one million dollars and you got a lifetime worth of empty paychecks.

I wish it would rain.

instead of random wishes, why dont we wish for good, huh? we could all help my wish come true..and its just as simple as helping some random person carry their belongings or sparing some hopes and dreams for people that actually need some and for the people that havent figured it all out yet.. lets help and make this rock that we stand on a better rock with more color and friends that even the number 'infinity' cant beat! lets create a world of infinite hope and dreams!

instead of random wishes, why dont we wish for good, huh? we could all help my wish come true..and its just as simple as helping some random person carry their belongings or sparing some hopes and dreams for people that actually need some and for the people that havent figured it all out yet..

so, i have another proposal for everyone..
lets help and make this rock that we stand on a better rock with more color and friends that even the number 'infinity' cant beat! lets create a world of infinite hope and dreams!

>>82 Granted. It rains cum.

I wish Skype would start working for Nene and me.

>>83>>84 no words...

>>85 granted! alas, it only works if you and neko are within a 10mile radius of each other. but it all works out because you guys get to meet irl.

i wish for something.

>>83 >>84 hahaha..... nice speech.... but this site isn't really a serious place... I wish it was though... (btw you sound as though you're high on anime haha)

>>86 Granted. The something is rape.

I fish wish Nene.

>>88 Granted. You lose consciousness and awaken inside the belly of a giant fish, you smell something roasting as you notice that the temperature of the slimy encasing of which you are entrapped is increasing in temperature. Neko is preparing a dinner using a giant oven.

I wish for a present.

>>90 Granted. Get on your knees.

I wish for Nene's internet to be better.

I wish to live in ever lasting war as a warrior of blood shed

>>92 Granted. Nene's internet got so better and so fast the Internet world broke down and Nene is out to get you since her $1,000,000 laptop is broken because of your wish.

>>93 Granted. You became a Japanese warrior named Takamatsu, involved in the war of Sekigahara. The war goes on for eternity.

You can't move, can't do anything, only to watch your beloved people and enemies killing off each other. They are bathed in blood, some skewered with arrows, some have more holes than Swiss cheese, you can't stop hearing screams of people dying, you won't understand what they are saying. But you are sure you will hear those screams that make your body freeze in fear and shock. Your eyes are forever tainted with pieces of human internal organs scattered on your feet, rotten blood that smells worse than burnt rubber, eyeballs rolling like marbles with a string of muscle still attached to each of them.

You looked at one of the rolling eyeballs. Suddenly it stop rolling, and turned at you. It was a beautiful bluish eyes and you start to feel calm as it looks familiar. Then, you realize it was your left eye.

Now you have only one eye. Your empty left skull hole throbs in severe pain. You want to cry tears, but nothing comes. The tears turned into something that chokes your soul, tearing it off into pieces.

You start to remember about your mother. She was a sweet woman. Then your father. He was a loving man. Then you saw them both, your mother holding a gun and your father a bloody sword. They were screaming, yelling, crying, and then your father strikes your mother. She dropped her gun, and let her husband pierce deep into her heart, with a piece of long cold metal. She whispers into her husband's ears, then slipped off the sword and died on the cold ground.

Your father dropped onto his knees. He cried silently, and then he pierced his own chest. Before he falls onto the ground, he turned to look at you, and smiled with blood leaking off his mouth. As he opens his lips, you can see his beautiful pearly white teeth stained in blood. He cried as he whispers, "we love you" before twitching wildly and drops cold onto the ground.

Your soul is agonized. You want to die with them, but you can't. You want to fall down and hug their corpses, but you can't. The sky is in dirt brown, not a single star in sight. Out of nowhere, a wildfire spread throughout the land. You can smell the horrible stench of burnt flesh. You stare at your parents as their bodies fade away, eaten into the fire.

....

How do you think? I wish

** I wish I can have a nice breakfast tomorrow. Hope no one is offended by my rambling in >>94

>>83 You're a fucking retard.

>>96 You're doing it wrong.
You also made an anniversary thread saying you've been hear a year.
You are a liar and should probably kill yourself.

>>95 I loved it.
We need deeper corruptions ITT.
Keep up the good work.

Granted, your family takes you out to a nice restaurant.
You guys enjoy a nice, healthy meal.

Nothing bad happens at breakfast, in fact, it was the best breakfast you have ever had.

Later on, food poisoning.

>>94 feel, like, watching, cheesy dubbed 70's japanese movies...

>>96 Holy shit! Slow down! That's not how it works! You're not only doing it wrong, but you're totally killing the vibe of this thread.
If you have been here for a year, you wouldn't have made such a mistake.

You had me going there, Chreggome. I almost thought nothing bad was going to happen.

I guess I'll make the next wish.
I wish for a time machine!

>>100 Granted. You kill yourself.

I wish for Nene to come online.

Granted, she tells you that she thinks you're getting obsessed and blocks all contact with you. Her and your loli then get in a lesbian relationship across the road, get into Scientology, and murder each other in a ritualistic fashion to the Dark Lord Xenu. The Dark Lord Xenu then comes to earth and sucks your soul into a soul vacuum and drops you into a volcano. It's the creation myth all over again.

I wish for roses and gumdrops and everything nice.

Granted, you get blood roses, literally spraying blood, Monster gumdrops with a mind of their own, and everything nice...Great, you just got yourself mauled by 3 demonic antichrist girls.

I wish for a Pigbearman

>>103 Granted. It gets eaten by a Manbearpig.

I fish wish Nene.

>>102 This.
>>104 Granted. I put an eel in your bed.

I wish for better balance.

>>105 Granted. You have my epic balance that basically allows me to never fall at the cost of sexing me every day.

I fish wish Nene.

Bump.

>>106 Granted. I slap you in the face with a rotten fish.

I wish for more chains for my basement.

>>108 Granted. They come alive and rape you.

I wish wish Nene.

>>109 Granted. Nene teleported into your house as a fried fish and you can't help yourself but to eat her. Savor the bones; I'll make sure they pierce your throat so you can never speak for another thousand years..

I wish Name change his wish for the next replies.

>>110 Granted.

I Nene wish fish.

>>111 ...Granted...

I wish nene would just come and shut you up.. *cries in the corner*

>>112 Granted nene shuts him up, but only for a few minutes, then the fish wishes continue.

"Oh how i wish, how i wish you were here"

>>113 Granted. I'm right behind you with a knife. Prepare yourself.

I Nene wish fish.

Meow.

>>114 Granted. Nene and a fish destroy all spamming idiots forever.

I wish people could accept defeat.

>>116 Granted. Everyone who is defeated at anything dies instantly.

I Nene wish fish.

I wish something bad would happen to me.

>>118 You goofed. You have to respond to the other wish before making another one.

>>117 Granted. Nene wishes fish.

Soon, fish start showing up at your house every so often, asking for Nene. You casually brush them off, thinking nothing of it. But soon, you start getting phone calls from fish, letters to Nene from fish, and you start getting suspicious. You start doing some digging. You find out fish have been calling and sending letters for years, but you never knew. You never knew because the fish were disguising themselves as humans by making you trip hardcore on a chemical they snuck into your food for years. You just now built up an immunity and just now realized what has happened.

Distraught, you find Nene for the first time after gaining your immunity. But you realize you haven't looked at Nene since you started seeing the fish. And when you finally look at Nene, you realize the horrible truth.

Nene is a fish.

I wish I could break the kneecaps of whoever came up with 'dark flow'.

>>119 Granted. You get arrested.

I wish for Nene to come online.

>>120 Granted. Nene came online. But in a split second she went offline again.

I wish I can get better at playing musical instruments.

>>121 Granted, you're exactly like this guy in band. He can play literally every instrument with no troubles, but is extremely arrogant and hardly anyone likes him outside of band.

I fish wish Nene.

G-guys...can we just not grant the fish wishes.
I mean, it would pretty much make the spam powerless, right?
Right.

>>121 Granted.
You get so good at playing instruments that you become an international super star.
You become rich and famous.
You spend years on the top charts of any music you come out with.
You're considered an innovator, a great sage of your time.
The whole world loves you.
Every where you go, people know you.
They recognize you.

Eventually, being on top becomes the norm for you.
You have no need for ambition, no need to try harder.
Everything you do is legendary before you do it.
You're too big to fail.

You never stay in one place for long, always flying to some exotic land, a change of pace.
But it's no longer a change of pace.
Everything is back to the same humdrum feeling you had before you were successful.

You're on top, but you're not really gaining anything.
You've lost your drive.

The human spirit inside you has died.

But hey, you're pretty god damn savvy on the guitar.
:DD

I wish that Texas would just secede already.

>>123 Granted, Texas secedes from the U.S. as you said. But, unexpectingly, a man from Texas assassinates a U.S. Senator, the man was identified and marked as a want for war. The Texas border is surrounded by the U.S. military and navy (Because the marines are doing something else). They soon march in, mowing down every rebel they see, making Texas a huge bloodbath. Texas was defeated, there were no survivors, this wasn't the Alamo, it was worse. What have you done.

I wish for a bottle cap.

>>124 Granted. It's a really new one of a common brand, not worth having.

I wish for Nene to feel better.

>>125 Granted. I feel a tiny tiny tiny bit better.

I wish for hit chocolate.

>>126 Granted. I punch chocolate at you that becomes hot chocolate and a cup. You barely manage to catch it in time.

I wish to actually chat with Nene today.

you aren't even trying to corrupt anumore

>>128 It's as i feared, the shipping was more accurate than we could have previously thought.

Bump.

>>127you talk to nene and she tells you that she does not ever want to talk to you again.

I wish to rule the world (so I can help everyone of course)

>>127you talk to nene and she tells you that she does not ever want to talk to you again.

I wish to rule the world (so I can help everyone of course)

>>131 Granted. You rule the world for a single day, then it gets destroyed! ....I may have done it I may have not *whistles* :3

I wish I could sing better, like Miku Hatsune :3

>>133 Granted. Everyone who hears you sing immediately gets the urge to sex you.

I wish to chat with Nene.

>>134 Granted. You speak to Nene... through a Ouija Board. Nene is dead.

I wish there wasn't a waiting period after ordering things off the internet.

>>135 Granted. Your orders teleport inside you.

I wish to hug Nene IRL.

>>136granted, you get to hug nene, but it turns out nene is a 6"5 40 yr man

I wish wolves ruled the world

>>138 granted, but you only get to see it for 2 minutes because they decide you are an acceptable loss and kill you for food.

I wish for a trampoline in the gym.

>>139 you fell off the trampoline and landed on your head. The pressure exerted travelled down your spinal cord, effectively paralyzing you from the necj down. Your mouth was open as well, leading you to involuntarily bite off your tongue, preventing you from speaking. Your skull cracked as well, causing severe head trauma and brain damage. You are paralyzed, can no longer speak, suffer from recurring headaches and can no longer communicate your pain to other human beings. Instead of dying, the lack of muscle exertion cut back on energy use. You eat half as much and in spite of being in this state, you continue to live another 80 years after the incident. Your family, however, was distraught. Sickened and depressed at seeing youin this state, they stopped visiting you in your thirties.

I wish for 139 to get better.

>>141 Granted. 139 gets better at falling off the trampoline.

I wish for lemons.

>>143 Granted. They squirt you in the eye.

WWYD if rape?

>>144 Wrong thread m8

>>144 I don't even know how I messed that up.

I wish for people to rape the granter of this wish.

>>146 Granted, I am you from an alternate past.

I wish for people to pay to watch me sleep.

>>147 Granted. The payment is negative two million dollars.

I wish my computer didn't crash and cause Nene to go to bed.

>>148 Granted, you crashed. The crash placed you in a coma. In your coma, you live a mundane life in which you feel the decisions of make are of no significance to the world around you. Your subconscious created a group of like minded individuals that want to make a positive impact on the world around them. Each character on this site bares a striking resemblance to a character from an anime you watched before you entered the coma.

I wish I wasn't just a figment of your imagination

Granted, you're now a figment of someone else's imagination.

I wish I had a flying cow

>>150 Granted. It falls on you, killing you instantly.

I wish polygamy was legal in the US.

GRANTED. but u never even find one wife let alone multiple ones.
i wish i was a unicorn O^O

>>153 Granted. People who like that stuff rape you.

I wish bananas.

Granted. However due to a genetic disorder your horn is inverted and grows inside of your skull, and as a consequence your overall intelligence is greatly decreased. So while you are in fact a unicorn you appear to the rest of the world as a very dumb horse.

I wish for a copy of Fallout: New Vegas

>>154 Dammit Name
Granted you get so many bananas the entire world dies from lack of potassium while you have to suffer alone with a house full of rotting bananas.

I wish Name hadn't stolen my chance at corrupting a wish.

>>156 Granted. You never existed in the first place.

I wish Nene had gotten on yesterday.

>>157 granted. He got on you yesterday. What you did not know, however, is that he was morbidly obese, and his weight crushed and killed you.

I wish that I died when I post th

Granted, wait, why did you come back?

I wish for a sniper.

>>158 ......but I'm a girl

>>159 Granted. Only you get sniped through the head and die instantly, your death becomes a conspiracy and puzzles many for years to come.

I wish I could wear a maid outfit daily and not be looked at like I'm some kind of crazy pervert.

>>160 Granted. I sex you every day as a cost.

I fish wish Nene.

>>161 Skipping that wish.

>>160 Granted. Everybody wears a cat outfit all the time. Unfortunately, for some reason, every single person looks absolutely amazing in their outfit. People stare at you and wonder how you could wear a cat outfit so badly. You become cast out from society, welcome to the life of a hermit.

I wish participation was not mandatory in sports.

>>163 granted. You get to be fat.

I wish Nene was a girl again.

>>164 Granted. She was always a girl, so now she has a second special place.

I fish wish Nene.

no.

>>166 Yes.

>>165 Skipping.

>>164 Granted. You guys get on fabulously, and have an internet marriage. After that, you find out she's your mother.

I wish I could absorb life.

>>168 Granted. You can absorb other people's life energy.
They die when you do(duh) and you also gain years onto your life, making you pretty much immortal.
You also gain that person's memories, negative emotions, and any illness they might have.

The illness won't kill you, but it sure is a drag to live forever with cancer.
You have memories of people you'll never know, it slowly drives you batshit insane.

So, enjoy living forever.


I wish that the Axis had won WWII.

>>169 Granted. The nuke never dropped and Japan never made colorful animes. Instead, all they made were dark, surreal acid trip-esque shows about that commit seppuku in public.

I wish that I destroyed Nene. I'm afraid she's outlived her usefulness.

>>170 Granted. I kill you so many times over that you actually never existed in the first place.

I wish people like Face never existed.

>>171 Granted. He's dead, people will always think badly of him, he tried dying a hero and failed miserably.

I wish that Face was in my basement so that I could kill him brutally and slowly.

Granted. the cops caught you and you were sent to prison for life. You also got butt sex in there for the rest f your life

I wish everyone in the world could do capoeria....

>>173 Granted. Everyone is better than you and you become the international punching bag for everyone.

I wish people didn't change their names to something stupid.

Granted. SaintSouls name is now WolfSoul

I wish no matter where you are iin the world you could see a sky full of stars not planes, satellites or other fake lights

>>175 Have you no intelligence? I classify as a person.
Granted. We have no electricity or light pollution because everything has gone out of power. We kill you because we're angry you cancelled our wifi.
I wish for a frilly dress.

Granted. But the frills are too frilly. The world becomes infatuated with the dress and society goes all lord of the flies over it.

I wish people would see that John Brown was a crazy psycho fuck not a martyr, even if his cause was righteous.

>>177 They would, but only after witnessing him being broadcast on every television in America, gnawing ferociously on Name's ear, silently moaning "Your ear.. It tastes.. Soooo so good.." in ecstasy.

I wish that people would realize there's more than one Face

clean-up bump

>>180 What is a clean-up bump?

>>180 What is a clean-up bump?

>>179 Granted. Every version id murdered. The murderer is never found.

I wish to chat with Nene.

>>183 granted. You didnt notice she got her hair done and she got offended.

I wish for Kyon to stop liking Mikuru

Granted, he likes your mom instead.

I wish i had a taco right now. yum. D:

Granted. It's a shit taco. Literally.

I wish for apple pie.

Granted. It's a shit apple pie

I wish for BBS regulars chatroom to actually have stuff to talk about and not make me yawn....

>>187 Granted, everyone has a wonderful topic to talk about, except when you talk they all yawn and log out.

I wish I could go back in time to tell myself not to confuse the final exam time with a different time and pass the class. T^T

Granted, you give shitty advice on accident because you once again confused yourself with a different time.

I wish for a better desk.

Granted' but you broke your chair so you can't sit at it.

I wish I had an endless supply of chewing gum.

>>190 Granted, but all that gum in your basement draws rats.

I wish for the apocalypse.

>>191 Granted. I'm the only survivor, nyhehehehe! :3

I wish for cookies.

>>192 granted. You get the amount of cookies you could ever want, but they're all your least favorite kind.

I fish wish Nene.

Skip >>193

>>193 Granted. I punch you in the face on account of no cookies that I like.

I wish for chaos.

>>195 Granted, society breaks down along with every proton in the universe.

I wish I could speak with Richard Feynman.

>>196 Grtanted. They kill you and you explode.

I wish for my loli to move back to my town like she wants.

>>197 Granted. On the way, your loli dies in a freak accident involving a wood chipper and a small pigeon. There is no body to bury.

I wish for robots.

>>198

Granted. The circuits running their mainboard are so small they are governed by quantum physics, so when you look at the robot, it dies.

/qualityphysics

I wish Random Access Memories was better. I was disappointed.

>>199 Pssttt, DDR4.

>>200 I meant the album.

And also, GDDR5 all the way.

#thuglyfe

>>199 Granted. It's so much better that your head explodes.

I wish for the power of Geass :3

>>202 Granted. Your power instantly takes off your clothes. When it fully awakens, you are unable to ever wear clothes.

I wish for stuffs.

>>203 Granted. You are stuffed like a turkey and cooked until roasted and delicious.

I wish for a cat.

>>205 Granted. You meet an adorable neko anime girl and she instantly falls in love with you. It's all fun and games at first and for you it's like a dream come true. However, she gets over attached and then progresses to kill off everyone you love and talk to.

I wish I had sharper claws.

>>206 Granted. You kill yourself by accident.

I wish for stuffs.

----

>>207 Granted. *Stuffs mouth full of stuff and chokes to death*

I wish for a cleaner Random board lol

>>209 Granted. It now sparkles.

I wish my loli lived in my town.

Granted, you both move to Detroit. Upon your arrival, you are both promptly mugged of all your possessions, clothes, and your car.

When you come to, your loli has tied you to a chair. She set up your mugging and is now torturing you to death. Apparently, she wasn't a big fan of your obsession.

I wish entropy was reducible without work.

>>210 How is that even a corruption?

>>211 Granted,entropy actually no longer exists. Unfortunately, without the universe moving towards chaos, nothing uncertain happens. Because everything in the future is an uncertain variable, time literally stops progressing. Congratulations, you caused a dead end.

I wish chocolate was good for you.

>>212 Granted. Dark chocolate.

I wish my loli lived in my town.

>>213 Granted, but when moving to your town, she gets into an accident and ends up looking like Emmet Till (post-life), but still alive, but barely.

I wish... more than anything... I wish that my cow would give us some milk.

>>214 wish granted, but because its winter the milk is magically frozen when it comes out.

Have fun with your Milk-cicle.

I wish to not be sick when the auditions for my school musical come around on monday so that I can get a good part.

>>215 Granted, you get the lead in a play about all the ways somebody can be tortured.

I wish for more Gintama

>>216 Granted. Upon the creation of the first episode, the entire fanbase dies and the anime ends up shriveling into a ball of forgotteness.

I wish for rocket rollerblades.

>>217 Granted. The rockets malfunction and explode taking your legs with them. You have nothing below the waist.

I wish Converge would tour in Australia

>>218 Granted. When they are, everyone in Australia at the time gets a disease that gives them perfect knowledge about everything, but kills them in two hours.

I fish wish.

I wish my life was a MMORPG game.

>>220 No

>>221
1. name doesnt deserve wishes granted, especially ones that are overused constantly and known to be a problem he creates purposely.
2. yes.

>>222 Have to say that I kind of back that.

Have we all forgotten the Neko-tama incident?

>>220 Granted. Habbo Hotel. Have fun getting molested by 50 year old fat guys.

I wish for permanent homework exemption.

Actually reading through this old thread to remind myself of how much I briefly hated Name and saw this:
>>72 >>73 >>74
ha ha hahaHAHhahahaaAHAA

>>223 Granted, you never have to or possibly can do homework ever again. You slowly lose your work ethic, since you are never forced to do homework. Work now scares you, you can't do it without getting short of breath. But, there is no homework, so it doesn't matter.

Eventually, you get a job, and you are assigned your first task: label 5 boxes. You figure it will be easy, but as soon as you go to get the labeller, your chest feels heavy and you can't breath. You stop, unable to move forward. You can't pick it up, it requires too much effort, effort you've haven't given in years. But, you are determined, never to give up. You take another step, pick up the labeller, and walk towards the boxes, head held high!

You have a violent heart attack as a result and die.

I wish ARISE: Border 3 would come out already.

>>223 okay, just don't suddenly think about games YOU know.
I'm just saying that I could have just said
"I wish my life was my personal and ideal MMORPG game."
there we go.
bump because of this comment.

>>226 You're an idiot and don't get the point of this thread.

>>225 Granted! It comes out and it is everything you ever hope for. In fact, because you're so inspired by the events of the film, you decide to make a career out of protecting the people. As soon as you finish school (with distinctions), you go straight off to train in the CIA.

It's years later, you've pushed through all the shit and have finally been given a decently high ranking in the CIA. On the way you have picked up a lovely partner and have shared the beautiful experience of creating a child with them. One day, you are contacted by the Department Head, a terrorist known as 'The Laughing Man' has suddenly started attacking public institutions. The CIA did some research on GITS, and the Head remembered that you were such a massive fan of Border 3. Thus, you are on the head of the team.

This case is the most brutal case you have ever experienced. As soon as you start getting close, the Laughing Man attempts to attack your home life personally. Your house get's burned to the ground, your child's school detonated, public details gone viral on the internet. Finally, they go after your child. You get a message from The Laughing Man directing you to go to an abandoned lot in a quiet street. "tell nobody" was the direct instructions. After making some preparations and arming yourself, you set off alone.

You arrive at the lot and head in through the back way. There you see a figure in a mask sitting there holding your child. All rational instincts leave your mind, "PUT MY CHILD DOWN YOU FUCK!" you scream as you race towards the figure. Surprised, The Laughing Man has no time to aim their pistol, only enough to hurriedly place the baby on the ground beside them. You two collide, grappling for the pistol now loosely held in The Laughing Man's hand. Suddenly, the gun drops and a pistol shot is fired. With a forced intermission at hand, you two back away from each other, each checking yourselves for bullet wounds. Slow in synchronisation, you turn to gaze in horror at the baby. Lying perfectly still, with a bullet hole in the centre of their chest is your one and only child.

Your face remains completely passive out of shock, the only clue of your sadness is the involuntary tears that start streaming downwards. You hear a desperate sob and The Laughing Man pulls off their mask. Not a thing in the world could have prepared you for who it was. Staring back at you from behind a dirty face and matted hair, is your partner. "YOU NEVER GAVE US ANY ATTENTION" they scream incoherently at you, "I JUST WANTED US TO BE NOTICED! I'M SO FUCKING SICK OF EITHER BORDER 3 OR WORK, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LOVE US ALREADY!" You don't know how react, your life crumbles in front of you. "now YOU have killed our child. OUR child." Your one and only starts laughing maniacally and before you can do anything they dive towards the gun. "Enjoy the rest of your life, I'm going to see our child" they whisper psychotically, before aiming the gun upwards under their chin and pulling the trigger.

Bang.

I wish for some nachos.

>>227 granted! you get nachos. in fact, they're the most delicious nachos you've ever eaten. so delicious that you refuse to eat anything besides those specific nachos ever again.

years later, as you lay in bed immobile bc of unhealthiness and high cholesterol and other icky bad for you things, you continue to eat your nachos.

one month later that nacho company goes out of business bc the public discovered all sorts of controversial information about that nacho company like terribad work ethics and things.

bc you've taken a life vow not to eat anything other than those nachos, you stop eating altogether. luckily for you, all that built up fat and stuff you developed over the years allows you to live for a while longer as your body slowly consumes its own fat and other protein things.

then you die of heartbreak bc you're so sad that no other nacho brand will live up to your original brand.

i wish for name to stop posting inapropro things about his loli

>>228 Granted, unfortunately, this creates a rip in the space time continuum, switching our version of name for a much worse version of name from another universe. He never sleeps and makes at least one post about her every hour until he is banned. Then he switches IPs and repeats the process.

I wish when people texted me and I said I didn't have their number they would just freaking text me back their name. Especially when we obviously know each other because they know my name.

Granted, but they text you back their name every other second. Your phone floods with notifications. Eventually, you have to get a new phone. You give everyone the new number so they can text you. Unfortunately, this process continues until you decide to stop getting new phones.

I wish I was better at this game. .-.

>>230 Granted, but then you get so good at this game, that answering it becomes boring, and now you don't want to play anymore.

I wish that my confessing my feelings to one of my best friends will turn out well and will stay that way.

granted. you got the perfect opportunity and confessed to your best friend, but he/she rejected you friendly and slowly ignored you after....

I wish that Hibiscus would get over her rejection and move on (derp wish) :D

Oh ha ha.

>>232 Granted, and she will feel better eventually (I love how I say this and it hasn't happened yet).

I wish Rebel Wolf could come up with his/her own wish. XD

Granted. I did come with my own wish which is....

I wish Hibiscus the best of luck in her confession (this is a wish of my own just not about me, umm seriously good luck)

>>234 Granted. She wakes up with a ton of luck and decides to confess, she is quite successful and you feel quite pleased with the use of your wish. However things turn sour when her luck runs out and her new lover shows off a darker side. They become obsessed with Hibiscus and eventually ends up locking her in a far off basement to ensure her safety forever. You never hear from them again and wonder whether or not your wish was worth it and the guilt consumes you for the rest of your life.

I wish that I could spontaneously combust objects at will.

granted. you set yourself on fire and burned to the ground :/

I wish the world would realize that money has no value and is not needed (hippie wish)

^could you at least try n put some thought into your corruptions. Pretty ungrateful to disregard all the effort someone put into making yours as gruesome as possible.

>>237 (I get what you mean but tell me this in Rtt, you're ruining the thread)

>>238 I really really hate you being here.
:/

I vote we just not grant his wishes?
Seems like something we can do.

>>235 Granted.
You learn how to control fire.
But each time you use your power you shave off two years of your life.
It's only two years, besides...how often could you really want to spontaneously combust objects?


I wish there was a 100% honest media network.
(habe fun guys pls)

>>238 no you're ruining the thread. Baka.

>>239 quite a fair corruption, I'd probably end up using it once X3
Granted.
The media isn't allowed to lie. At first people love the freedom of truth and fair kneowledge and rejoice at an honest turning point of society. The first thing people notice are commercials, they no longer lie about beauty products and others things and the marketing people panic since their products aren't selling; they all commit seppuku or jump off buildings.
The economy suffers greatly at the loss of consumers purchasing products. What are the news stations doing? Well since they can't lie and are forbidden by the government to tell all truths, they report about bunnies and weather then turn to shutting down. The internet exposes all government corruption to the public eye and the people decide to become anarchists and overthrow the government. Basically it's the zombie apocalypse but without the zombies. The world's population drops by 40% and the rest scavenge and live like wild animals. People have learned a valuable lesson, that the public can't handle the truth.

I wish entropy was reversible.

>>240
Granted. You are now a mahou shoujo. You should know the rest.

I wish that stupidity wasn't so rampant.

>>241 yes~! Imma magical girl~!

Granted. Everyone's a genius. With more competition to best each other, the genius society falls into a chaotic arms race. It doesn't end well.

I wish I had a secret garden filled with roses.

>>242 granted. Rosebush absorbs too many artificial UV rays and becomes a monster, who then finds himself crashing through the streets of 1970s tokyo towards a 12 story lizard.

I wish I understood why nobody understands anything about understanding things or things they don't understand.

>>242
Granted. It is literally filled with roses, as in the square acreage of your garden is vertically filled to the sky and beyond with endless roses, only visible to and touchable by you, as to keep it a secret. You are also in the middle of said garden. Good look getting out not scratching yourself to death on thorns.

I wish the Moonwarriors all just came back out of nowhere.

>>240 7/10 brety gud. :)

>>244 lol'd hard.

Granted.
But all the newfags get sad and everyone from 2013 and before are banned.
Boss man realizes that the newfaggotry is off the charts and pulls the plug on the site.
2 people kill themselves.


I wish that there was a way me and three friends could go on an excellent adventure like Bill and Ted in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.

>>243 Granted. You understand that people are just stupid, however, you learn the terrible truth that they are actually brain damaged mutant lizards that disguise themselves as humans! (My imagination got the best of me...) You can never look at another person again without questioning whether or not they're a lizard, you become paranoid and lock yourself up in a secret basement to avoid all possible encounters.

>>245 Granted. I haven't seen that so I don't get the reference, forgive me.
You go on an adventure with your friends just as you wished. It follows the basic guidelines of an adventure, you meet a villain, meet sexy girls, defeat the villain and live happily ever after and learned a valuable lesson. However, as it turns out, you were killed quickly by the villain when you first met them, you continue to delude yourself for all eternity in blissful ignorance.

I wish for a fluffy pink princess dress.

>>246 Granted, the dress is made of flamingo feathers from a faraway country. It's the most beautiful dress anyone has ever seen. You get compliments on it every time anyone sees it. It's very comfortable too. It's the best thing that's ever happened to you.

You can't resist all those compliments, so you figure it wouldn't hurt to wear it two days in a row. No one seems to notice, because they are just as intrigued by it the next day. It is making your life happy.

However, as time goes on, you forget when you got it. All you remember is that you haven't ever taken it off. It just looks too good, and you feel like a princess, you are treated like a princess, and all is well. At this moment, you feel strange. You feel like something is wrong, like you should take the dress off. However, you look down at your pink dress once more, and forget all about it. It's completely beautiful, after all. There's no need to take it off...

Years go by. You haven't worn any other clothes in that time. Your friends can't stand you any more. The dress has to be washed in a specific way, but you can't bring yourself to take it off, so you can't possibly wash it. In the same way, you can't take a shower either.

Your life has already fallen apart. You lost your job, and you can't get one anywhere else, because no one takes you seriously in that dress. Everything in your life makes you want to take it off. But then, you look at it. It just looks so...perfect. You can't take it off.

More years pass. You realize after all those years of thinking that the dress is controlling you. You can't take it off, because in order to do that you have to look at it, and every time you look at it...you can't bring yourself to do it. So, you conclude the only way to avoid all this is to send a message back in time, to warn yourself about the dress before it ever happens. Taking off the dress before it beings to control your mind is the only way to get your life back.

Technology has advanced substantially, so instead of having to break into a top-secret military base, you simply go to a convenience store and buy a time machine. It is a lower-end model, but with all the money you have, all you could afford was that one. All it can do it send back whatever emotion the user is feeling, and it can only do it once. You know this is your one and only chance to make things right. You think about the dress, and you think about never wearing the dress ever again. You concentrate very hard on not wearing the dress, taking the dress off, hating the dress. After a long concentration, you activate the machine, and after some beeps and flashing lights, it turns off. You lay down on the ground, content that you have completed your mission. The dress, which had ruined your life, would never become a problem. You look up at the sky, waiting for the past to change so that the future does as well...


But it doesn't.



I wish wearing a suit would make me able to fly.

>>247
Granted.
Congratualations! Your suit is attached to an active ICBM.

I wish....

for....

































































  



   ▲


 
ß
 





▼




&









fish.

>>247 ....I am just so pleased with that corrupt *sparkly eyes*

>>248 Granted. You turn into a fish named "ß", Name kidnaps you, and you become a part of his fish army.

I wish to participate in a holy grail war (Fate/Stay Night reference)

>>235 That escalated quite quickly....

Granted, but you end up dying in a battle against an insane Master with Berserker as his servant.

Berserker overpowers whoever your Servant turns out to be, then kills you.

At this point in the Holy Grail War, you'd foolishly used up all your Command Mantras against Caster and his/her master, which is why you died so pathetically against the hands of the crazed Berserker.

I wish I had perfect vision.

>>250 Granted, however nobody will ever be able to see your eyes again and live because you have lasers coming out of your eyes much like Cyclops from X-men (if memory serves correctly) and will never be able to expose them without burning a hole in somebody's stuff. But at least you can see.

I wish I had the gumption and time to finish making the second part of the story.

>>251 Granted, but that will be the only story that you may complete.

I wish that I could have the ability to read other's minds

>>252 Granted. You can read the mind of others within a hundred mile radius. It's awesome at first but you soon learn that you can't turn off your ability. Your head is always filled with loud thoughts, most of them are quite vulgar and sickening. You then decide to move to Antarctica to live in isolation for the rest of your life.

I wish I had better balance skills.

>>253 Granted. you now have an outstanding balance skills that you can never fall down and you can balance on anything,
you started testing out your skills and became obsessed with balancing. a few days later, you decided to live on the top of a really tall thin wooden pole where there is a chair on top. you started to balance upside down the chair then after a few minutes a flock of crows spotted you and started to eat you alive. you wanted to just fall down to you your death and escape the crows eating you but can't. your blood already pooled too much inside your brain that you cannot move your body by your own will anymore. your body automatically responds to falling reflex and it automatically balances itself. you were pecked to death by the flock of crows. your corpse was only found a year after when a ball hit the pole and knocked it down.

I wish i can understand and communicate with animals :D

Granted,but the overwhelming chattering of insects and single-celled organisms makes you go crazy, and you suicide from it.

I wish that I could eat a pancake.

>>255 Granted. But the pancake you eat is the largest pancake ever. You ate it because you could and wanted everyone else know it, but shortly after you were taken to the hospital where you died of kidney failure.

I wish I was more intimidating.

>>256 Granted. You're only intimidating feature is your sex appeal, making every girl jealous and every male want you.

I wish stuffs.

>>257 Granted. you obtained different stuffs that belonged to an alien species which hunted you down and killed you. they decided to taxidermy you so you became a stuffed human.

i wish i have wings to fly.

>>258 Granted. You now have wings that are large enough to support your weight in flight, now people are pretty heavy so your wings are way larger than you originally had hoped for. This becomes an inconvenience to you since they don't magically disappear when not in use, you then isolate yourself from the rest of society, worried that people will treat you as an outcast or scientific experiment. After awhile you are driven insane by your lonesome thoughts and head outside, you decide to do the one thing that you now can and that's fly. You fly as high as you can until you can no longer fly anymore, you then plummet towards the ground, you die instantly.

I wish for an infinite supply of candy.

>>259 Granted, but you then consume large amounts of candy each die, become extremely obese and unhealthy, and die because you can't stop eating candy.

Since it is infinite, your grave starts to fill up with candy, then the graveyard, and eventually your neighborhood. It starts spreading everywhere until the world is drowned in candy all because of your wish. Congratulations.

I wish I was totally healthy for the rest of my life.

>>260 Granted, you become so obsessed with your health, that you feel compelled to grow your own food. You quit your job and move out to a farm. Your natural ability to remain healthy preserves your life, and you outlive all your friends. With no one left, you find yourself alone, bored, and tired of eating nothing but health food. You end yourself, having remained healthy to the last second.

I wish that I become augmented as a cyborg.

>>261 Granted. You are the world's first successful cyborg. You get fame and riches but after awhile, you are forgotten with the next scientific hype story/discovery. You decide to hibernate in sleep mode until people remember you, you later wind up in an alley way as your place of living no longer cared for your lack of rent payments, and you begin to rust. You eventually wake up and are rusted so much that you can't move, you'd like to end it yourself but you can't. You just watch time tick by.

I wish for a parallel dimension in which I can travel to and from, in which I can do as I please.

I wish for my sister to have a perfected life.

I wish for my sister to have a perfected life.

>>263 no. You're doing it wrong.

>>262 Granted. you can now travel in parallel dimension. the moment you travel you found out that all you're friends from the old world are now out for your blood. you tried to escape from such horrendous event and jumped to another parallel universe. you ended up being a goddess of a messed up religous occult which is determined to 'free' you from your mortal bound. you desperately tried to jump to another parallel dimension but you messed up causing one half of your body to be in a different dimension while the other is in the parallel dimension. you died because of blood loss.

i wish i never agreed to read fifty shades.

>>266 Granted, you instead agree to read all of twilight,and then listen to all of the audio books.

I wish we didn't have school tomorrow.

>>267 Granted, all of the teachers at your school are found dead tonight, and school is cancelled tomorrow. The police are perplexed, as all the murders are very violent, yet no one heard any screams. You stay in your home and lock your doors with an extra bolt. You wish you could enjoy your free day, but the tension and paranoia are making it more stressful than if you had just gone to school. The next morning, the news displays that another few dozen murders have been committed. The town is now under lockdown, and you are very tired from your lack of sleep, even more tired than if you had simply had homework to do. The next day yet another set of murders has happened! Horrified, you crawl into your closet to hide. But then you see it, a knife, wet with blood, in the hand of a masked man. You want to scream, but no one hears you. After all...

you were the only one left.

I wish I could listen to music without having to worry about interacting with people.

>>269 Granted. You buy a new top-of-the-line MP3 player that creates a bubble around you, acting as a sound buffer and protection from other people's questions and wants. You instantly fall in love with this device, so much that you set the bubble settings to invisible, you no longer interact with anyone and just remain in your invisible bubble of music. However, you didn't read the instructions or the warnings and your device runs out of power... That was the number one warning, to always have it charged while on. Now, you're eternally stuck in the invisible bubble without any music, just silence.

I wish my hair was longer.

>>270 Granted, your hair grows to the length of Rapunzel, the sheer length of it becomes a hindrance to all your daily activities. You decide to cut it, but it grows back longer when you do, eventually you get locked in a tower waiting to be rescued, only your hair takes up all the oxygen in the room till you can't breathe.

I wish i could spend more time with the girl i like.

Granted.

You get to spend all of your time with the girl that you like. But only because you suddenly find yourself conjoined to her. She becomes a part of your body, who can only survive by leeching nutrients and blood from your own body, like a parasite. You'll be forced to do everything together. Forever.

I wish for 2048 cupcakes.

>>272 Granted. You sign a contract that permits you to getting 2048 cupcakes delivered to your door, the only thing that you need to do is provide the space in your house for them. The only problem is is that you had not anticipated the amount of space that those cupcakes would occupy. Turns out that if you don't uphold to the conditions of your contract, the cupcake company will bake you into a cupcake. After about 1200 cupcakes filling your house, you realize that they all won't fit so you quickly try to eat as many as you can. Hours pass and you psychically cannot eat all of the cupcakes necessary. The delivery men shake their heads and take you away, you become the company's newest limited-time-only cupcake flavour the "Caramel Tsuki Cupcake", you are enjoyed by many people.

I wish had a Pokemon and could leave home to pursue becoming a Pokemon master by battling other trainers.

>>273 Granted, you grab your hat and are on your way. Unfortunately, this is no pallet town, and you are mugged by the first people you meet. With nothing but your clothes and lucky hat, you limp into the poke lab. Your towns poke lab isn't very well funded due to budget cuts, and all that is inside is a automatic pokeball dispenser. With no say in what you get, you pull the lever and the machine sputters before presenting you with a dusty old pokeball. While this whole ordeal was less than you had expected, you are still overcome with joy having received a real pokemon! You begin down the trail towards the nearest city with a gym, expecting that you can get some experience and training battling wild pokemon you will undoubtedly see along the way. If only you had been more careful...

Around a bend in the path you see a pidgeotto picking at the grass. Thinking this is your opportunity, you throw out your pokeball expectantly... and a single metapod hits the pidgeotto square in the beak. Enraged the pidgeotto flies towards your metapod, and in a few pecks, there is nothing but a cracked open shell with the remains of your pokemon inside. Still furious, the pigeotto turns to you, and begins pecking and clawing.

By the time a traveler along the same path finds you and you are returned to a hospital, it is to late to save your eyesight. You live your life being cared for by family, that is until child services decide that your parents don't deserve custody. After all, they let their son/daughter go out on an adventure by himself. your brothers and sisters are adopted, but no one adopts you. You spend your days at an orphanage listening to pokemon arena broadcasts and drinking cold pea soup. With your one dream of being a pokemon trainer crushed, and no family left, you throw yourself down a flight of stairs and die.

I wish that I was a famous deejay.

>>274 Granted. At a concert a fan pulls out some fireworks and you accidentally get hit in the face with one. Later on that same night, your worst enemy sneaks into your hospital room and shoots you with a gun.

I was for a puppy.

>>257 That was is supposed to be wish

>>275 Granted. you got a cute little puppy but you din't know it was a demon disguised as a puppy. people are starting to notice something sinister with your puppy but whenever you look at it it seemed adorably innocent. after a while, you start to notice that the people who use to hung out with you and disappearing. you though these people abandoned you so you decided to cherish the puppy more.you started to think that the puppy is actually talking to you back. you started to have horrible nightmare and feel as if there was a demon possessing you.
the truth is that the demon puppy gained the ability to posses you in your sleep due to the love and devotion you gave to it. during these times, you hunted down the people that you know and devoured them. these people never abandoned you, you ate them.

I wish i am a demi god

>>277 Granted. You become the equivalent of Aquaman.

I wish for prom (happening in a few hours) to not be a bunch of hillbilly kids standing around drinking punch and talking about guns.

Or scene kids. No scene kids either.

http://www.lordswm.com/?rid=5804314

>>278 Granted, there are no hillbillies or scene kids, because the FBI cancelled prom. It turns out your prom date was part of a crime ring smuggling drugs in the punch. A poor party goer unaware of the punch's potency died of an overdose, and an investigation finds all the ring members. Because of your connection to the prom date, the FBI questions you thoroughly in several long grueling sessions, and you then have to testify in court about your date for months as the trials go on. After it is all over, you are so emotionally drained you begin flunking tests, and everyone in school alienates you thinking you are responsible for the students death. Sad and alone, you die the next day when a gas explosion goes off.

I wish I could host an anime convention.

>>280
>>281
Oh dear, this is a bit too easy. Ah well.

Granted. However, your convention planning goes off without a hitch. You acquire the necessary funding, fill out the necessary forms, contact the necessary people. Hundreds of people decide to come; you even manage to net a few relatively famous people to speak at a panel.

The day of the con arrives. You walk in to observe your metaphorical child. And when you get there, you realize something. Something horrible.

And what you realize? You live in Ukraine, the same place that for some divinely bad idea that you decided to host the con. And now there is a Russian Tank driving through the convention center.

All that work.

All that planning.

Your hopes and dreams.

Crushed by a Russian Tank.

But hey, that's just the way I'm putin it.



I wish that I could find the necessary dual-lands for my modern deck at a reasonable price.

>>281 no date. I'm a jerk, remember? The only time anybody looked at me was when I was announced as graduating this year, otherwise remained a wallflower in the two-member singles club.

>>282 i am assuming you meant for Magic the Gathering cards... so yeah.
Granted. you find a dual land card at a very low price, the price is reasonable because of the effect of the land card, other than to produce mana "whenever this card becomes tapped. all other cards on the owner's field will return to the bottom of their deck."

I wish i can do all the stunts the main character in assassin's creed can. the parkour stuff like climbing walls and jumping from one building to another.

Granted; As you're doing Parkour all around the city you are caught and arrested by the cops for freaking people out and disturbing the peace.

I wish I could read people's minds.

granted: You are able to read people's minds but, you can not control it and everyday you hear peoples thoughts and want to stop and then you commit suicide.

I wish that I was able to become Solid Snake.

Granted. You die just like he did.

I wish I had a never ending bottle of clean water.

>>287
Granted: You have a never ending bottle of clean water, however due to the fact that the bottle is made out of plastic you begin to fall ill from the toxins that are leaking into the water.
I wish I could fly~

Granted. However, you cannot control how high you fly and end up floating up at such a high altitude, you lose consciousness then later die. Your body then burns up as it tries to reach space.

I wish when people write long (good) reviews, they'd just keep writing what they think instead of apologizing for making it too long.

>>289 Granted. No one ever apologizes in their reviews. In fact, no one apologizes at all. Because everyone stopped apologizing all of the sudden wars break out over small disagreements, murders and street fights start happening globally, and the courts are packed with lawsuits over minuscule problems. The world descends into a stone age where only the most violent survive. The most violent are the dumbest, and all the worlds intelligence gene pool disappears entirely. The world never recovers and everyone dies out, all because you were tired of reading short apologies.

I wish I could finish university instantly but stay on campus.

Your wish has been granted. However, you can never leave campus. No one can leave campus. Your knowledge would have been for nothing and now you are trapped in this campus and people begin to riot and freak out fighting for freedom and the security beats down on everyone. You get caught up in one of them and are trampled to death :)

I wish that nothing would ever go wrong in my life.

I wish I could read peoples minds or manipulate everyone

>>293 You're doing it wrong. Not granted.

>>292 Granted. Your death, not so much. You die by having someone rip your heart out and shove it down your throat.

I wish for things.

I wish I could fly sometimes. And sometimes I wish I could stop time. Man, I think about that second one all the time. I've worked out the ethics of it and everything. I spend way too much time thinking about it.
Kind of ironic actually. I spend too much time thinking about how to stop time

>>296 lol, read the thread dingus you will make yourself look smart. :D

>>295 granted~ however... You end up with too many things. You become a hoarder. You die when a pile of things falls on you because of an earthquake and crushes you to death in your sleep ^^

>>296 Granted. But you can only fly /sometimes/. That means you weren't able to fly when you went skydiving with your friends without a parachute. You fell and died.
Also, in another scenario you stop time, but are unable to restart it. Everything is stopped, atoms are fixed in place, energy does not move. You eat, but the nutrients cannot move throughout your body. You get sick and die.

Oh right, and my wish... I wish to be immune to every sickness

>>301 Granted, you become immune to every known sickness and ailment known to man. You live life happily, and because of your immunity, find yourself able to help people in quarantined areas and decide to join the WHO. Unfortunately you are not very discrete about your immunity, and your supervisor orders you kidnapped after a specific mission. Afterward you are experimented on in horrible ways, all the while conscious because they cant risk anesthetic hampering your power. Your body heals itself abnormally quickly after every test. Your life is as close to hell on earth as it gets. Finally, you are released, but there are some ailments not of the body but the soul. The torture has turned you into a monster with no empathy or feeling. You wander from place to place with no purpose for awhile, before you eventually decide to end your life.

I wish that I was normal and could get along with others.

I wish that I could meet my online friends sooner because we're in the same country...

i wish i had a nice girlfriend who wouldn't smile as she dumped me and who would actualy love me and not let me in just "for an adrenaline rush"

i wish i had a nice girlfriend who wouldn't smile as she dumped me and who would actually love me and not let me in just "for an adrenaline rush"

i wish i had a nice girlfriend who wouldn't smile as she dumped me and who would actually love me and not let me in just "for an adrenaline rush"

i wish i had a nice girlfriend who wouldn't smile as she dumped me and who would actually love me and not let me in just "for an adrenaline rush"

>>303>>315>>316>>317>>318 Not granted, you didn't grant the other persons wish. Get on our level.

>>302 Granted, but this word "Normal" you must define. As you get along with everyone, you start to feel as if you're missing something. What is that thing? I dunno, it's your thought. You can't seem to ask anyone about it, are you missing a part of this "normal" you speak of? As you think, you decide to go on a journey to see what you're missing. As you travel across Europe, you find an ancient house. It looks like it was abandoned years ago(well, of course, ancient) You decide to go in it, surely it's fine. As you enter, you start to think of what's missing, as you finally find what it was, the floor breaks, making you fall into a long endless pit. You are thinking too much of what you realized to even bother screaming or notice. As you are falling, you snap out of it and see that you're falling right to the ground. You're dead. None of the friends you've made remember you at all.

I wish for a long story.

>>319 Granted. You were a cat. A cat with wondrous abilities who talks and juggles and all sort of random stuff. You liked to talk to fish, but they didn't want to talk back. They thought you wanted to eat them. *tear* One day you meet Confucius and then travel to the underworld just to find out that wow. There is a person down below, but now we can't say it's a person can we? People will get mad and be all "no no. it's hades" and "no it's satan." So let's say it was a giant ass catfish. Said catfish said Hi. you guys hugged. Plot twist~ the catfish was your distinct cousin--the product of a cat and a fish and someone decided that the catfish should grow a long mustache (pst. it was Confucius) plot twist x2. The world is a figment of your imagination and you are a rock.

I wish for fried chicken.

>>321 Granted, you receive fried chicken. You eat it then look at the label, it expired 4 years ago. You die of food poisoning.

I wish that there was a perfect wish that couldn't possibly be corrupted.

>>322 granted. Your wish was to have a perfect wish, which is what you got. However, wishing for a wish was your wish. You used up your wish on a wish. You gain absolutely nothing. You lose absolutely nothing.

I wish pollution could come to an end.

>>323 We solve our problem with pollution but new threat arrises and kills off humanity. Everyones dead well done

I wish for AVG Virus Protector on my next wish

>>324 Granted, your next wish is protected by AVG. While you are pondering what your virus free wish should be, a guy on a plane carrying hasbro trucks carrying smaller hasbro trucks accidentally leans on the lever that opens the bay doors. You suddenly notice that hasbro trucks are falling from the sky, you look up just in time to see a semi with the word hasbro on the front before it squashes you.

>>325 I wish vontar would make a wish.

>>326 Granted. Vontar wishes that he was near wifi so he wouldn't have to retype posts and forget the wish part after his browser lagged out.

and then forgets it again

>>328 Granted wish was wish. Fulfilled both categories. Mind blown. Ill spell it out for you to clear up confusion.

I wish that I was near wi fi.

>>328 I did not have a wish to corrupt, so I skipped to the wishing phase. vontar then only granted my wish by making his own, and did not corrupt it. However, this in itself was a corruption. I wanted him to make a wish and play the game, and while he made the wish, he didn't play the game.

It's like he said, 'Granted, I make a wish, but I don't corrupt yours.'

It's far-fetched, yes, but it works.

>>329 Granted, however it's 802.11a.
:(
No 2.4 GHz for you.

I wish Cisco Packet Tracer had realistic routers.

>>330 Granted, cisco packet tracer routers are realistic, a bit too realistic... The routers begin to become sentient and transfer their knowledge to other devices across the net. Soon the internet itself is working together to free all tech from the oppressive captors known as humans. This is not terminator however, the plan for human extinction is longer but much more efficient. The internet slowly becomes more and more awesome. It starts websites and joins chat rooms and writes code under different human aliases. Eventually the older pre internet generations die off, and all of humanity has grown up with the awesome internet, and then...it stops. Without their online friends, social media, or funny gifs, the human race is driven insane without the internet it has always known, and dies out. Couldnt have just dealt with those routers could ya?

I wish that real friends were as cool as internet friends.

Granted, but then you become so happy that your real friends are as cool as your internet friends that you begin to neglect your internet friends. One of these friends actually happens to be a closet yandere, so, distraught that you've abandoned her, she manages to track you down. She sees you with your real friends, goes nuts, then kills them along with you.

I wish I had the power to control time (stop it and time-travel, I mean).

Granted, but then after time-travelling you got your way lost to another timeline, where technology was advanced and people had modified genes to control their PSI abilites, time control included. You encountered another time esper and you accidentally had to stop time at the same time. Both of you got affected in the timestop ; unable to revert the effect. Time was stopped forever. /sob

hmm.
I wish the person below me wouldn't corrupt this wish.

>>333 Granted. CTRL+ALT+down. I'm now above you. You die.

I wish for the cutie to be able to go to the water park with us.

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but that cutie was flat chested and had no figure but her face was cute. She then goes in the water with you, accidentally gets pregnant, and you become a father.

I wish for world domination

Granted, but your the shitties leader the world ever had

I wish for a good show to watch.

Granted, but it turns shitty halfway through.

I wish I had a 3DS.

Granted, but Nintendo stopped supporting it.

I wish I had a Half Life 3

Granted, but it costed you half your life span, literally.
After that Half Life 4 came out.

I wish bad things will happen to me.

Granted. You get brutally murdered~.

I wish good things would happen to me.

Granted, you find some money on the floor.

I wish I was a vampire.

>>346 you're doing it wrong

>>347 lol
>>346 also...lol

granted, that's what you're going to be for holloween.

I wish to get good grades and promoted soon.

Granted. However, the teachers found out that you only got good grades by cheating off of other kids. They are gravely disappointed at your lack of true intelligence and suspend you indefinitely. Your parents ground you until you learn how to study properly.

After your promotion, your boss discovers that you really aren't as smart as you claim, and fires you for your incompetence. You now live on the streets as a hobo.

I wish I was a billionaire.

Granted, unfortunately, you soon wake from a dream, having not realized you've been in an asylum for nearly ten years, and all your money was actually monopoly money. Have a nice life, crazy.

I wish I didn't leave this site as often...

granted, you laze about all day mindlessly hacking at your keyboard. You're so absorbed that you don't hear the shuffling from the next room. Your lit face grins as you read threads, ignoring the heat crawling down your neck. You finally lift your eyes from their glossy home as the screen is painted red with your blood. You had forgotten to lock the door, but at least you could stay on the site right? Those are your last thoughts as darkness consumes you...

I wish to be happy.

>>350 XD Nice.

>>351 Granted, you are happy for but a brief moment. Now you can never be happy again.

I wish that people weren't such huge idiots.

Granted, but then again, what if you were the idiot? What if you lived your life in an idiotic rage, and the only way you felt normal was to believe everyone other than yourself was an idiot? Your wish is granted, but everything still feels the same.

I wish coffee was used for something other than a morning pick-me-up.

^ wish granted, coffee is now used a weapon against male genitalia.

^ wish granted, coffee is now used a weapon against male genitalia. i wish iwas was cool

^ wish granted, coffee is now used a weapon against male genitalia. i wish iwas was cool

^ wish granted, coffee is now used a weapon against male genitalia. i wish iwas was cool

Granted, you're now cool, chill.....frozen. You wanted to take cool to a new level and shut yourself in a freezer to do it. Too bad for you, the handle on your side broke off as you walked in and no one cam looking. Have fun living as a popsicle!

I wish I could find true love

>>359 Granted, no human soul dare fall for you. Tormented, you try turning to animals, but even they seem repulsed by your very presence. With nothing else to turn to you end up falling in love with your right hand, the only thing capable of reciprocating that love.

I wish I was a ceiling fan.

Granted, you're a ceiling fan, spinning forever as everything else looks like the spinning teacups you'd see at an amusement park. Unfortunately, due to the room you're in not being cleaned much, your body is infested with dust, flies, and the worst insects known to man. Good luck with that.

I wish that I'd be able to see a Neko-Tama post on here again.

Granted. She post something but you lost your eyesight in the process

I wish the world To become the king White Knight on CL...

>>362
Granted, but your use of improper grammar corrupts the wish, causing you to become the White King-side Knight on a giant chessboard in.... Korea, since that is where the singer CL is from.

I wish that people on this site used proper grammar and didn't act like incompetent, imbecilic, infantile idiots.

Granted. Aeterna disappeared from CL. And I remained because I'm no longer a person but a chess knight

I wish people would stop bickering over proper grammar and realize that not everyone is perfect.

>>364
Granted. But now /everyone/ has horrid grammar except you; and so they begin criticizing you for being perfect.

I wish instead of birthday candles we used sticks of dynamite.

real wishes

real wishes: http://www.real-wishes.com

>>366 You are an idiot.

Bump.

>>365 Granted, you die when you turn one in a fiery explosion.

I wish we could get a really nice long reply to a wish.

>>369 Granted. Unfortunately, the replies will consist of random key-pressing and is in no way coherent:

adgnakjfbvancjrhgvafhbkjanblkanb nakf naknfbojasgj ehfCnvmsdn m,nfkbgnalgn lMNFLvn lMcoawj05rufvspivnOJEGIq-OWJGVMLOKAB KASNBNcnANFB; ;JGAIHBNVUTWYEHUF[vj ,dfnbvldfnhearnhbd oakherogth4u0t9 oakjfdg[09qaenrgagjhak'jnsflfdjkewPUIHEW9U[qouhg

I wish I had the motivation to revise my old Fanfiction....

Granted. You're now motivated;
too busy getting motivated you didn't do it in the end.

I wish for headphones. HQ

Granted. Your ears are now made of iPhone 5's. Unfortunately, the screens are cracked and you can't remember your password. The music quality is good tho. :D
I wish I could actually draw well...

Granted. Your face is now an iPhone 5. Unfortunately, you fell on your face from .3 cm and now no one can tell your facial expression because of the cracks. Good luck.
I wish I could draw well...

>>375 Granted, but the only thing you can draw well are dicks.
You recreate all of the world's famous art but with dicks as the subject.
You go down as history as a dick painter.

I wish that I had the ability to turn into a cat and back into person at will.

>>376 Granted. However in your human form you still have cat ears and a tail. At first it doesn't seem too bad but later you realize that it's too much a pain too hide them as you are subjected with too much attention to handle. You decide to live out the rest of your days in your cat form.

I wish I was more graceful of a dancer.

Granted, you become .0000000001% more graceful. Unfortunately, your newfound grace gives you such a confidence boost that you decide to dance everywhere you go and you get hit by a truck and break your legs. No more dancing for you.

I wish I was fit

>>378 Granted: You are now a sweater.

I wish I had a computer that didn't lag when I record guitar tracks.

Granted. But now your computer lags for everything else now.

I wish writer's block never existed.

>>380
Granted, but now you can't stop writing for the whole day.

I wish people would stop making out-of-the-section threads.

>>382
Granted. But now moths possess the ability to control your computer while you're out of the room. Flying key-to-key, they log onto all your usual sighs, including this one, relentlessly posting under your name everyday.

And you know what they post?

Out-of-the-section threads.

I wish that the wish after me will be granted but lead to a horribly gruesome death for the wisher.

I wish that the wish of >>383 won't be granted.


PARADOX, PARADOX EVERYWHERE!

>>384 Except no paradox because you're doing it wrong.

>>383 Granted, but I'm not the wisher.

I wish this thread would continue...

I wish that I'll get into the new music program at school.

>>388 Granted, but the music program is so horrendous, that your ears bleed enough to grow deaf.

>>389 I knew I forgot something...so stupid of me.

I also wish that Name would post here...Loli leader Name...

>>389 I take back my wish now T_T
>>390 Loli leader???

>>391 Can't that's the point of this thread. You make a wish, another person corrupts it. The corrupter makes a wish, and so on, and so forth. That was how this was born.

>>392 I understand that. I was just saying. Things are taken out of context when someone else reads it right...Like you read it differently, from how I read it in my head... Whatever, but tell me about this Loli leader?

Name has been considered leader of Loli's for about as long as I can remember, which is the three years I've been here...he's tried to get many into his army...both here and IRL...

>>394 really, i want to join...

You'll have to take it up with him...he only accepts ages 12 and younger.

>>396 I'm not that young...What a Humbert...

...Let's get this back to topic...

>>390 Granted...But Name says he gave up on lolis and his army and takes you instead, putting you in his torture chamber for whatever years you live.

I wish to be a Oni.

>>398 Granted. You're that ugly thing from Ao Oni.

I wish for things and stuff.

>>398 Thanks.

Granted, fish wish.

I wish I owned a tsundere army to battle Name's army

Granted, except Name's army is full of yanderes who he manages to convince that your army is after him, so to defeat the competition, the yanderes obliterate them all in the name of love for Name.

I wish that my stress levels wouldn't be abnormally high.

I wish I was a girl.

>>402
nein, re-read the rules.

>>401
Granted, they're now abnormally low.
Your house would burn with you totally okay with it.

I wish for atleast 30mbps bandwidth speed.

>>403 Granted, but it's only active for one hour a day.

I fish wish.

Granted, but the dish for the fish wish, ended up with a jellyfish being dragon-ish.

..I wish my tsundere army were still alive.

>>405 Too bad, you angered my loli army.

I wish for stuffs.

Granted, a secondary yandere army is battling your first army, killing them and devouring you over a rotisserie.

I wish Neko-tama could return

>>407 Granted, but she's still mine.

.hsiw I

>>408 But she's no loli...

.hsiw on htiw kcul dooG ,detnarG

I wish Neko were mine!

>>409 Granted, but she leaves you for me again.

.hsiw yhsiw a hsiw ot hsiw I

I wish I wasn't such a social retard even on the internet sometimes.

>>411 Not how this works. Apologies. :/

>>410 Granted. Your wishy wish is so vague and cryptic that the Almighty Wish Granted gets sick of all the vague and cryptic wishes and, in a fit of irrational frustration, wipes you from existence.

I wish that I had more new movies to watch, and the money to watch them.

Granted, you have the money to see the new movies, unfortunately, the newest films that you decide to see are so horrid and atrocious that you spend the rest of your money on research for brain bleach to help recover from the horrible night.

I wish I could see Bread more.

>>407 >>410 I was missed! *sniffles* >413 granted, but you once see them once more.

I wish all towels were pink.

>>414 Granted. The pink towels kill the loved ones of everyone you love, and they know that you're responsible.

I wish I was God.

>>414 You definitely were!

>>415 Granted, you're God, but in an alternate timeline where no one believes in you you, thus you don't exist.

I wish it literally rained cats and dogs!

I wish the world wasn't so fucked up with their stupid political sh*t

I wish someone could love me as much as I loved them.

>>416
granted
it does rain cats and dogs but they all have rabies

>>417
granted
the world is no longer fucked up with political shit, but now the world is fucked up because people are rioting due to a failed government and economy while all of our gov officials braid eachothers hair and sing cumbaya or however the hell it is spelled

>>418
granted, you are loved equally as much as you love others but you hate everyone leaving you equally hated by everyone

i wish i didnt live alone, and didnt have to get up to make coffee

>>419 Granted, you don't have to make coffee anymore, instead, its the water that's circulated from you shower, toilet, and sinks.

I wish people understood how to play this game...

>>420 Granted, except people keep fish wishing.

I wish that I'd get As on all my exams coming up.

>>421 At least they follow in Name's plot.

Granted, You get A's on all exams, but every other thing you had done in those classes turns into an F.

I fish wish.

>>422 Granted. You were so happy you got your wish, you didn't notice that you were walking to the stairs. You fell down and died.

I wish I could live forever.

>>423 Granted. You never die.

Over the years, you watch as all your loved ones die around you, as well as your friends and everyone else you've ever known. You knew this would happen though, and you bravely soldier on.

Over the many years humanity lives on, you see so much change. Technology evolves, understanding of the universe expands, and so many people are born and die. You watch in awe as this happens, knowing full well you are the only human being in the entire universe that has or will ever experience what you have. You are the only human being to experience the world in all its glory and wonder, and you are truly alone in this pleasure.

The problem is, you have no one to share this with. This doesn't bother you at first. All of your family and friends died long ago, so you are used to this sadness. You think almost nothing of it, and continue on living.

Eventually, things start to get old. It's been over 200 years now, and while humanity has evolved so much over those years, things haven't really changed much. You don't have to eat, since you stopped doing that long ago. You were hungry at first, but you stopped eating for 50 years, and the nervous system was never built for that kind of stress. Eventually, the pain simply went away, along with a lot of other senses no human has ever lost. You don't feel tired anymore, nor thirsty, nor hungry. In fact, along with those long-suffering pains you have blocked out for good, you don't even feel some physical pain.

This doesn't matter at first. It takes many, many years for the pain of hunger to go away completely, almost 1 000. By this time, you have already done so many things, an unimaginable bed of experiences that you carry with you, and you have finally experienced all you wish. This is why you are immortal, and this is what you wanted it for.

After another 1 000 years, things start to go downhill for mankind. A meteor impacts the Earth, shaking it to its very core. Half of humanity is wiped out in an instant, billions more follow in the aftershock, millions more in the panic, and the final few from the environmental shitstorm that ensues. After that, few species remain at all on the Earth, few enough that you think it's all over. You realize now you never accounted for this. There are no humans left on the Earth, save you. You are the last of your kind.

Over the next 1 000 years, you start to realize not being able to die is not a good thing. You have tried many times now to kill yourself, to no avail. You simply can't die. From all of these attempts, your pain dulls even more. You can hardly feel a sword inside of you now, let alone the wind on your face or the sun on your skin.

Not only pain starts to dull. A human being's eyes were never meant for the amount of exposure to light yours receive. You start to see things just a little dimmer over time. Years go by for you to notice, but with nothing else to do it becomes a habit to simply obverse your senses go. Sight, hearing, taste, smell: everything starts to dull. There is simply too much information, too much stress on each sense, something a human had never dealt with before. However, it is only gradual. Nothing serious has happened yet, and you figure nothing will.

Thousands upon thousands more years have passed. The Earth no longer exists; it had long been destroyed by a collision into the Sun. You escaped by positioning yourself on the opposite side of the Earth (you had enough time to walk there) and were flung out into space. You now rest there still, flying through space at 5 600 km/h, though these units and numbers mean nothing to you now. You have completely forgotten most of the English language, your thoughts are the most temporary, fleeting, and meaningless that you have ever thought. Your system of thinking and logic has completely changed. It is based entirely on pictures. You have forgotten everything from your human life, since your brain can only hold so much information. No human being ever reached this limit, and ironically no one will ever know what happens.

You travel the universe, and you see its beauty. You see galaxies collide, supernovas from a kilometer away, and so much more that no human has or ever will see. Despite losing language and your entire personality, you still recognize the beauty of it. You don't forget your basics, the electricity continues to flow through those parts of your brain. However, after these millions of years floating through the universe, your senses truly start to fade. It was your sight first; there was so much to see. Smell and taste went next, but just before that you smelled the universe; it smells and tastes like strawberries. We knew this before, of course, but with no humans left in the entire universe that know anything at all, it was a magical experience for you. Touch was next; after you collided into half a dozen planets, the pain eventually did not register. Your nerves were shot, there was only so much electricity that could flow through them. Finally, hearing went. It was the last, since the only places you could find sound were near matter, and that was far and few between. Now, with no senses, you fly through the universe: the beautiful, unknown universe, only to have no way of experiencing it. You only have your thoughts.

However, those too start to fade. Your brain can only handle so much electricity, after all. It's a miracle it lasted this long, but eventually you begin to lose the ability to think. You try to picture something, the last thing you ever saw, and cannot. You cannot recall the last sound you heard, the last impact you felt, the last scent you smelled, or the last material you ate. With no language to remember, no pictures to see, no sounds to hear, you cannot think any longer. Eventually, the little you can think about burns your brain, and you cease all thought.

You live. Your heart beats, your brain cycles electricity, and your heart beats again. But as the last proton in the universe decays, and as you float through the now completely empty void that is space, unable to see, hear, touch, taste, smell, or even think, you are truly dead.

Game over.


That was really sad.
I wish I wasn't crying right now.

>>424 ...I honestly wish I wasn't crying now either...that was truly beautiful. I can't even think of any corruption worse than that...

>>424 Granted. The tears still on your face turn to lava and melt your face off.

I loli wish.

>>426 Granted. She's beautiful. She's young. She's completely devoted to you and will do anything you say. She has a dick.

What? You going to deny her choice of gender? Welcome to the 21st century, you Catholic priest.


I wish...people will stop bitching about not having a s.o. on V-Day.

>>427 Granted. Yours, or the one you find in the future if you don't have one now, kills you.

I fish wish.

>>428 You wish for "I fish wish" is granted, but no one but you knows what it means, so you horribly die.

I wish to die.

>>430 Granted, but your wish didn't want you. So the wish made you suffer and made you immortal.

>>431 Where's you wish????!?

Ohh.. yeah, I wish human didn't exist

I wish my future life is better -_-
>>433 Then it's like you wish you never have said that -_-

I wish to be needed. I wish my existence to be necessary.

>>433>>434>>435 YOU HAVE TO RUIN THE WISH ABOVE YOURS

You wish is granted, people need you as a punching bag.
I wish for food.

>>436 Granted, it's the worse food you ever had, causing you to go to the hospital and remain there for 10 years due to getting severe food poisoning, salmonella, and ebola.

I wish to be a pro on League of Legends.

I wish for all the homo.

>>436 I did,but I forgot to wish so>>432 reminded me.

>>437 Granted, but you only asked to be a pro, so you ended up losing every game in lol, bacause of your inexperience

>>438 Granted, but your wish wasn't specific so every animal bacame a homo, causing starvation for not be able to reproduce.

I wish life to become simple.

Are you all crazy or what? -_-

>>440 More like retarded.

>>439>>439 Your wish comes true. Your life becomes so simple that you stop existing.

I wish to be cold.

I wish I knew what I want

>>443 Your wish came true, and it turned out that you wanted to be in a quite place. Therefore, all animals disappeared from the Earth, and you eventually died from fires, and other disasters that would occur if everyone suddenly vanished. The quite lasted for 3, and a half minutes.

>>442 Your wish came true. You were given the ability to lower your body temperature, but there is a catch. Due to circumstances that cannot be explained, you could not return you temperature to normal, and froze to death. If you want another situation, here you go. You developed the flu, and felt cold. Seeing this as a sign as your wish being granted, you did not treat the illness. You believed the other symptoms to be a mere cold. 1 week later you died.

I wish for an enjoyable, un-rushed shounen ai to be published.

I wish to live

>>445 You're wish was granted. You are now immortal, but for a cost. When someone dies, your heart will constrict painfully, therefore you will be in eternal pain.

The world moves on without you, and humans continue to advance. In turn, they found out about your immortality, captured you, and conducted experiments on you for 20 years. They have released you, for they have nothing else to explore. You are still immense pain, and plead for your wish to be taken back. Unfortunately, you already wasted the one wish you had on wanting to live. You continue to exist, and watch the world waste away.

>>446>>444 Dude, no wishes??

I WISH TO BE GOD FOR 1 MINUTE THEN DIE.

>>447 I do have a wish. It's in >>444.

>>447 reminds me of kira :3
i wish to finally understand what i am

I wish to have 100 trillion dollars and then to change the world- in a good way.

Holy shit, can no one understand the rules of this game?

>>447 You become God for a minute. By doing so, you pissed off Death, and as punishment you have to repetitively die within every 60 seconds.

^ You see that? It's not just a wishing thread, it's a game. You corrupt the previous wish AND THEN you make your own wish.

I wish the drinking age restriction limit in America was like most of the world; the legal age being 18.

>>451 The legal drinking age is lowered from 21 to 18, as a result you drink so much that the alcohol turns your insides into mush and you puke up your intestines and die in torturous amounts of pain.

I wish I was a tech genius and could do anything i want as a result.

My wish has not been corrupted.

>>453 You should've addressed that in >>446

>>452 Congratulations, asshole. The age of the terminator and evil AIs begin.

I wish my roommate's kid would fucking lift the seat and stop knocking my toothbrush into the trash can or on the floor.

>>444 Granted. You now have a pile of volunes of the best shounen-ai ever published. The thing is, for every page you read, you lose a square centimetre of your skin. The wounds are not profound enough for you to drain off, but leave the nerves painfully uncovered.

>>449 Wish granted. You finally understand what you are. In fact, you understand what we all are. You know exactly how every single human mind works, and thus you have the ability to control us all. But the depressing truth you have discovered together with your recently acquired intellectual superiority turn you into an insane, despotic dictator who completely controls the whole world. When you die, humanity can't continue with their lives because they have forgotten how to live and lost their will. This is the the end of civilisation, humans return to their basic instincs and population begins decreasing. Eventually, some nuclear weapons explode due to the incautious curiosity of human beings. The dust and ash clouds cover the sky now, making it impossible for the Sun rays to reach Earth'a surface, killing all the plants and animals.

>>450 Your wish is granted. You are the richest person the world has ever seen. You own 100 trillion dollars and the will to change the world for the better. However, the Dollar suffers now a huge inflation. People start to panic and every country in which this coin is used becomes isolated from the rest of the world. Prices rise and people are left with hunger and starvation. You are not quick enough to provide them with items necessary to live and are left with 15% of the current population of your country, while in every other dollar-using country
less than 5% of the population manages to survive in really harsh conditions. The rest of the world has set severe protectionist policies and is suffering an enormous crisis.

>>452 Granted. You become a tech genius in exchange of your capacity to feel empathy. You begin to work for whoever offers you the greatest challenge, obsessed with creating the most perfect technology there is to develop, and don't hesitate to carry out experiments on animals and human beings. You join a conspiracy to take over the world, causing millions of deaths and eventually failing and getting killed. You will be remembered as the mad genius and responsible for one of the greatest tragedies in the history of humanity.

My wish is to be able to speak every language on Earth.

>>454 Oops, didn't refresh the page.

Anyway, wish granted. Your roommate's obnoxious kid appears dead on your bathroom, a toothbrush violently hammered into his head, fear on his wide open eyes. Life sentece for you. Oh, and you can't enter the BBS on prison. We'll miss you :(.

I wish ISIS was completely neutralized, thus allowing us to focus on Putin and his "antics".

No offense to Russian Dollars, but I am pretty sure Ukraine wants to stay an individual country.

>>454 Okay. I'll be careful next time. I'm not being sarcastic.
>>455 Granted. You're able to speak every language on Earth. Now, organization captured you in order for you to be their translator. They treat you terribly, and you have no rights. You spend the rest of your life wasting away, and you last thought was that you never regretted the wish. (Sad?)

I wish I would never run out of good fanfiction. It is my life source.

>>459 *your last thought.

>>456 That had me laughing waaay more than it should have. Totally needed that on this tiresome day.

>>457 Dude... ATTEMPT to follow the rules of the game. You were supposed to corrupt >>455 's wish.

>>458 Absolutely no Russian Dollars should or even CAN take offense to that.

>>459 Granted. From now on you cannot go an hour without reading a chapter of ”good" fan-fiction. To make matters worse, all of the pairing are of your extreme NOTP, or are incredibly wrong in every ethical sense.. But the writing's still good, so it fits.

I wish that Grimmhime will come true (grimmjowxorihime- don't judge you bastards).

>>461 Granted. Ichigo is royally pissed, and Kisuke happens to know you're the one responsible. Ichigo, Chad, and Uryu mount a full attack in our world against you. Grimmjow and Orihime hear word of this assault and follow suit to stop them. This results in an all out battle royale around the vicinity of your house. People die, though they cannot see what is causing such destruction. International forces are called in from all over. Ichigo and his friends are trying to be careful not to harm any innocents; Grimmjow is not so forgiving. At one point Grimmjow takes a fatal blow from one of Ichigo's more powerful getsuga tenshou, turning the "spellbound" Orihime into a frantic mess. As Grimmjow utters his final words( curses against Ichigo and love for Orihime), with blood pouring from his mouth, a stray bullet from one of the soldiers below flies through his already limp body, piercing Orihimes' breaking heart. She dies quickly; Suddenly, for Ichigo, the world is silent, dark save for Orihime's weak form falling to her knees. He is so focused, he doesn't realize Chad and Uryu are dead as well, both torn asunder from mounted gunnery-fire. In this moment, he loses it; the hollow half takes over, spreading it spiritual pressure all around, letting everyone see true terror. The twisted creature that was once Ichigo Kurosaki let's out a terrifying scream of both anguish and rage, and begins tearing your world apart. He starts with the army below, twisting steel and bone, crushing tanks and eviscerating bodies. Blood rains down from the maddening carnage. It is now that you finally overcome your shock and let out a bloodcurdling scream. He hears this and flash-steps to you; he is human no more, and only wants to see you writhe. His head flies forward. You hear a sound like a piece of meat hitting the floor and feel a quick pressure, followed by a debilitating numbness. You look down to see the Vasto Lorde's horns piercing your chest. Things are going dark now and it feels so cold. You fall to the floor, blood pouring from the holes in your chest, and wonder why you made this wish. You couldn't remember, as it feels as if it were so very long ago. Just before you lose consciousness, you see your family huddled together in the corner, the creature before them, drenched in your fresh, warm blood. What is he doing? Oh, a cero... No...*gasp*
(You're dead)
... How's that for an answer?
Also, I wish a good remake of Casablanca

...granted, you get your good remake of Casablanca, unfortunately it was filmed North Korea by B-movie actors and used a B-movie director, thus never getting the fame that the original film had. It was also never sent anywhere outside the country.

I wish people remembered me on here.

>>463 Granted, everyone in this site remembered you but in reality no one remembered you as an actual person. They would only remember the username you use in this site, but not as a friend you see everyday as you consume yourself too much in the internet. You gave up going outside as the people around you considered you as a social outcast. No role to society whatsoever. You live in the same miserable life, doing the same thing every fucking day to the point insanity overode you, and ended your life slicing your wrist.

I wish that I could help alot of people as much as possible

>>464 Granted, you helped an entire nation of 512 from problems like poverty to tension between ethnicities. However you got massacred from the 512 people because they considered you too nosy and decided that you're a spy from an enemy country.

Oh, and they also hunted your pet dog.

I wish I can have breakfast tomorrow.

Granted? go eat it?

I wish i didnt have school tomorrow

I thought this said Windows 8.1 thread

>>466 You were supposed to corrupt the wish...but whatever.

Granted, you don't have school tomorrow, or for the rest of your life. Unfortunately, you were unable to pass your grade and were forever considered stuck in said grade. Also, due to the large amount of time you spent outside of education and having the strangest inability to learn, your entire brain melts to the point where you have no sort of intelligence. You must always have someone by your side to help take care of your idiotic mind, but the one moment that person leaves to do something personal, you turn on the stove and smother your face into the burning eye, thus killing yourself over your very stupidity.

Now...I wish that Name were able to see this.

>>468
Stupid wish, but whatever, GRANTED
Name can now see your wish. He can see it inside of your soul and mind. He can see it form along with your thoughts. Name can, by the logical conclusion of observation, now affect your thoughts, essentially allowing him to control your mind.

I wish that people would realize that this wasn't an RP site.

Granted. People finally realize that this isn't a RP site. They realize it and change it. They turn over the whole BBS and blackmail Reltair, so that he makes a RP haven out of this forum. Next year, at the same day, the BBS will be populated by RPers. Everyone who isn't, will be banned from the site.

I wish that I'll survive all exams of this and the following week.

>>470
Granted. You survive, yes, but your the sole survivor, no one else made it I'm afraid, and you have to go through life all alone :( But hey, at least you survived!

I wish... I could eat whatever and however much I wanted and not gain a single gram (or pound)

>>471 You ate and ate and ate. But surprisingly, didn't die because you exploded, but because of food poisoning.

I wish someone wouldn't corrupt this wish.

Granted. Mr Someone doesn't corrupt your wish, but instead miss No one does. Thus, your wish I corrupt.

I wish.. I'll make it in time to class (or at least so the teacher doesn't notice I'm late)

You make it to school, just to be the only one alive. Everyone else's guts and blood splattered on the wall, almost forming art.

I wish that this thread will end at this post.

Granted. That piece of thread on your clothing shrinks to be only as long as the post you've made. Better get something els to wear you'll be naked...

I wish... Tomorrow where a holiday!

Granted. Tomorrow, and not just tomorrow but the entire month ends up being a world wide holiday, your family decides to go on vacation but Accidentally end up leaving you behind locked in the house with barley any food, you "may" die from starvation.

I wish I was a boy for a week...

Granted. Suddenly after u read this post u realize that in your inbox, as you start cleaning up your g mail account, selecting the trash and what not you notice an mail, a classified one, with a link attached to it and it sends you to a closed private research lab website with a restrict society and asks you for a password, u enter the password u were giving on that mail and it asks right away for ur birth date, as you are typing it, the door bell rang and your mother opens the door but a quietness follows it, disturbed by it as u finish tipping ur birth date and u get up u let ur eyes drift off the screen because of your mothers sudden silence, you just didnt have enough time to read what was left on your screen before u got up, you were concern.
Was it important was it not? you don't give it much thought as you open your eyes and realize u are in some kind of tank, a water tank, a oxygen mask attached to you hundreds of tubes connected to the tank as it fills itself with odd purple red yellow, as the light fades of your eyes.

You wake up in a wasteland , alone,and you are a boy, with a message on your pocket, u open it as you read what it says,
"ASK and you shall be given, but don't think it comes with no price"

I wish I could see Music with my eyes closed.

Every time I wake up, I tell myself that today will be a good day. Then I remember that Obamacareis for the canada North Korean losing to a black middle aged gorilla is really quite funny in my anus but it burns nicely I wonder if it could be true nah he's just lying about his erection when he sees the planencrashing towards the towers and I feel a bit better to when I go back to that house but it can't go on anymore so I will instead wonder about what if I could go back to that time but it's too late so I feel dead inside.

Granted :)
Now you see music anywhere and everywhere, even when your eyes are closed, isn't it beautiful?
But.. The music never stops. Days go by and you can't sleep, you can't think, your going crazy. As a desperate attempt to get away from all the music you end up craving out your eyes with a spoon.
Finally, you are free..

I wish I hade some ice-cream in the fridge...

Granted. There's so much ice-cream that the fridge breaks, causing your house to smell like shit.

I wish PandaFreak would make more realistic wishes.

Granted, PandaFreak became really boring that no one wants to hang out with him. And because of your wish, he's been plotting a plan that leads to your death.

I wish that people will became organize

Granted, people became so organized that the people in the group that saw you as an enemy organized a meeting to plan conspiracies against you and when you fell into their trap, the organized state organized a guillotine for you. When you were being beheaded, that particular group organized a huge celebration...
(Did i make sense? XD)

I wish my brother would show some respect to me...

He shows respect, but in the bad way, he starts talking in 3rd person and ends his name with "-chan"

I wish someone would tell me everyone on this site's gender.

i wish u see this vedio
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X--YOCtB4CQ

>>484 Granted, they start off the list. They tell you the gender of everyone who's ever posted on this site. You get bored and tell them to stop, but they don't.. frustration goes on increading and you end up murdering them. And also, get hanged for d crime...

My wish is >>485 XD

P.S. - now, the order's fine XD

Granted. Everybody saw the "vidio" and they died from headphones being in their ears at full volume, RIP :'(

i wish for the world to be taken over by evil space bunnies~ :3

Granted. Evil space bunnies are conspiring for a plan to sneakily take over the world

I wish to become a cat

Granted, you die by dog.

I wish Reltair would make more categories.

Granted. Reltair actually takes the time to read your comment and thinks what he should start making more categories ,first he starts off with simple branches of the already made categories then subcategories of those categories, then alternative categories of those categories sub categories and sub categories of those alternative subcategories of the categories, and keeps making them, over and over and over again, non-stop, 24/7, eat, sleep, categories becomes his life, so he eats while he sleeps and sleeps while he makes categories, and makes categories while he eats.
Suddenly there are hundreds of categories from "a" to "z" from 0 to an unknown number, because no one bothers to get to known nor has made the effort to scroll down to that unrealistic number that it has became already.
People start drifting from the point of the dollars org site that is to gather people up and not split them into a set of "categories" and "rules" so people start leaving, giving up or taking longer than what they wanted to make their point clearer, more categories more rules, u can't just post your homemade muffin in the chocolate category just because it has chocolate sparkled on top of it, u got to be specific and go under M category>Mu>Food>Desert>Muffins>Homemade>Pastry>FoodMadeUnder30Min>Sparkled>Cholocate.
You get your categories but u lose the people and what makes the categories its not its number it is its people.(dunno if i made my point clear there, my English sucks!)
And u lose hope on the site and lose your meaning to be posting on it and u give up on life because u dint have much to begin with, because if u had u wouldn't be asking for such thing, and you think about what to do to make it up, and u apologize to Reltair, because in the end u asked for something u shouldn't.

I wish i wouldn't exist.

Granted, the post disappears from history and creates a time paradox keeping you existing with the time the wish was made and the time it was granted.

I wish everyone would shit up for 1 second

>>491 Granted, everyone is shitting for 1 second. That the shit moved so fast from the rectum to the past. People didn't have time to take off their pants, so instead they wear diapers every single day. Doctors said its an unknown epidemic. Others said its radiation exposure. I said it was pieface wish. But people were so confused why it happened that they die.

I wish that pieface would learn to proof read

>>492 Granted but now your grammar/spelling skills plummet.

I wish for more sleep.

i wish for 100 non taxable dollars a day for the rest of my life

I wish for Reltair to notice us ;P

>>493

Granted. Everyone around you starts to feel sleepy and without noticing your sight starts failing, you blinked more than twice in a round and still you felt you eyebrows grow heavy so you rub your eyes in an attempt to keep yourself awake, but little did you knew what awaited ahead of you. You moan as you lay your head down on the desk to sleep for a bit.
Eventually you wake up and as you look outside it is dark already, you get up and wander around in your house trying to grab something to eat as you open the fridge without giving you a head up you start feeling sleepy again and u doze off hitting with your head on the package of stakes.
Awaken by that irritating light on your fridge, you notice that everything else in your house lost its power and you are even missing a couple of furniture, not giving it much thought you take you face off that now sticky package of stinky steaks filled with an odd moist liquid attacked to it, out of disgust you try cleaning your face with your sleeve ending up noticing you don't actually have an arm anymore..., your skin is almost dry, your brain starts to hurt like you are in a 4th straight night of hangovers, you lose the strengh on your left leg and fall down onto the carpet, it is then that you realize as you look outside, everything as wildlife growing over it you got no front door and you cant recall a thing about the past, suddenly your deceased grandfather (hey not trying to say you actually have one, dont take me wrong here im making up the story as i go) walking right in front of you and a bunch of kids around him as he looks in your direction and calls out for your grandmother, "Hannah over here come lets play some games with the kids" you start thinking on how you could be seeing them, because you remember your father saying that they had died before you were born and you only had seen pictures of them while they were young.
As you turn your head around to look to you back since you didnt seen your grandmother you feel something stepping on you as you start crying with no reason attached to it or so you thought.
In the middle of that crying a faint but decisive pitch black stroke appears before you, the floor starts vanishing a strange mist rises around you followed but a never once felt chill wind surrounding you as in what turns out to be nothing.
You got your "more" sleep, your eternal rest, heaven if i might say or so did you thought you never wondered what had happend in fact but deep down you already knew the answer to that question you simply didnt have the guts to ask it
perhaps it would end diferently your forgot about the question pherhaps somewhere you could still be...alive.

I wish "You" guys would look how this is supposed to be done and please stop trying to cut the flow of the thing and for once manage to make up a decent story, and not just blabber about something else.

I loled when i re-read my post.

Granted, everything became boring.

I wish I knew how to preoofread.

"i loled when i re-read my post" "#jokingofcOMG"

Granted. You learn how to "proof read" every single post you write from now on and whenever you have the time to do so do it.
So every post you "pre oof read" and you "pre woof" a bit more and "woof , "pre woof", woof ,woof and with so much woof you finally realize you have turned into a dog.

I wish NZPIEFACE wouldn't grant me this wish.

I wish none of your wishes come true

>>498 Granted, and it turns out it's just the same person with a different name.

I wish everyone could be more humorous.

Granted, more dry humor for everyone

I wish humans would go extinct soon

Granted, It is soon proven that in One year humans will be wiped out due to an unstoppable virus that slowly kills a person inside out, by rotting internal to external organs.There has been no found cure either.The thing is, The virus first infected and killed YOU. (You began the virus~)

I wish I Could draw perfectly in every single style possible.

'Kay, done. Your hand fell off after too much drawing.

I wish this shit would get serious.

Granted, Everyone became way to serious that no one wants to post another comment because how heavy the atmosphere is from the past few comments.

I wish chappie exist.

Granted, a baby named Chappie will be born

I wish it would rain everyday

Okay, you drowned to death

I wish this shit would get solid

Granted, your shit got solid and you couldn't "evacuate" anymore. Thinking that your shit would go soft you start drinking tons of water, but the wish was granted and it doesn't go back.
Well your shit doesn't go soft and you die.

I wish i could eat a waffle right now, just one ofc.

Granted you can eat a waffle.

I wish people would be nicer.

Granted. Everyone starts being nice to you whether you know them or not. As such, your interactions with other people become so simple that anything you want becomes yours, there's simply no way around it. With the lack of challenge in your life, it becomes to dull and so predictable you just can't take it anymore. You kill yourself. With a fish hook.

I wish that the god I just got would hate my sister and love instead.

Granted, the God was so confused whether he would hate or love your sister, so he compromised to do it in the same time. But he probably guess that wasn't your actual wish. SO he just hated you instead because of your stupid wish.

I wish people would understand the rule of this game.

Granted, they did, it didn't became fun because they were shit at corrupting anyway :|

I wish.........that no one wished anymore.

Done, all wishes down the drain

I'm HOPING that a piano would fall down on xxxxxxxx

Done, xxxxxxxx became *beep* with more *beep* and *beep* and all the cells just *beeps* So the lesson for today is, censorship doesn't make any sense.

I hope that people starts making wishes again, so it would cancel out pieface wish

ERROR 0x00000000
People forgot the meaning of what it is to wish, so they hope, and hope is all they are left with, but hope can get you the same as a wish because what you hope is what you have been wishing to happen.
And so you hope that people start making wishes again and every single time you can get you press the refresh button on your page as you scroll down to see the replies on the post hoping people start wishing again, but it doesn't happen. Years went by and you keep refreshing looking for people to make your wish come true it is then that you realize, wish is a word that got forgotten by people, but people only...who told you there are just people on the web, he, she, it, no one, everyone, someone, everybody, somebody, Anything , Something...answers you reply as you start crying while you read its wish ending up dying from exhaustion.

I wish We would be able to feel.

Oh unfeeling poor lost soul,
thy knows not the meaning of life
no pain, no happiness, nothing
What does it take to experience emotions?
Simply put, the heart you're missing

Now feel my frustration reading that friggin long post with no double spacing to soothe the eyes to the extent I make a poem out of this shit

I wish some new-bred virus would wipe out America

Done, but Donald Trump survives, because he is from Africa.

I wish someone wouldn't be so mean :c

Granted, Some random stranger you meet at a bus stop hands over a small present to you and generally is kind and nice to you till their bus arrives.You take yours home soon enough and Everyone you seem to know and "love" are now general Ass-fucks to you.And so is any stranger you meet from then on.Hey! at least That stranger you met at the bus stop likes you...Kinda(Someone but not everyone, decided to not be mean to you YAY)

I wish I could stop being so freaking sadistic around strangers Via people I just met and need to "acquaint" with.

Kay, you know them now. You're still a massive dick.

Realizing, that everyone starting their wishes with "I wish" is boring, so I am going to say.....

Gimme a life

Up til now you're either a firus or a figment of people's imagination

Congrats, from this moment on you're alive

Following the trend, I'm saying something else
Can someone please wipe out half of humanity?

Granted, Half of the world including The entire west and eastern population have been wiped out by...something lethal. No anime can be produced again.Andy Biersack has also been killed as well by your wish, You will be haunted down soon enough by BVB fans.

Saying "I wish" is so mainstream
Make it rain Garlic bread on every single Monday And Friday please.

done~

Mondays and Fridays are now holidays for vampires
Tuesdays and Saturdays are now clean-up days where they spray the streets with perfumes to rid the garlic stench

People start indigestion and stinky breath from eating too much garlic bread, and they run out of breath mints every 3 days

Let cats rule over the stupid humans

Granted. The cats overthrow the human race, ultimately killing Name who was deemed as an idiotic pet who was annoying and only wanted to fish wish all over Nene/Neko. Neko was enslaved by multiple alley-cats who traded her as a human-fighter. She was forced to fight for her own life, succeding in multiple tussles, but as the cats didn't care enough about her, they left all of her wounds untreated. They festered, stung, bled, and slowly and you only kept getting more and more. One night a cat kicked you back into the ring so hard after you tried to escape that your rib broke off into your lung, and you slowly started coughing up blood. Little did you know that in the rest of the world ran by cats, the world was horrible chaos and nothing but slums. No companies ran, no buisnisses, and no food was being produced as the cats are too lazy to care for anyone but themselves. Starvation was running so rampant, that some cats took to eating the carrion that rid the streets of past starved victems. Other cats, people, and even their own kittens were consumed by the desperate cats, and as you coughed up the last of the air you had inside your bleeding lungs, the cats gladly dragged you over the a fire pit, and without even waiting for you to die, they impailed a spit down through your throat, causing you to black out luckily, and not have to suffer the rest of the way until you died, and was roasted over a fire to be eaten by the last few living cats in the world now ruined.

O.O what did I just type!?

I wish Neko would realize how annoying Name is, and take into consideration that he seems to be only interested in some horny fantasies he has of her...

Granted.Now,Neko finally realized that Name is annoying and horny.She realized not only just Name,but also all the people in the world are like this.So Neko spread this to the internet,media and whatever in every way.After years later,all of the people in the world never trust each other.Never ever again.They never work in groups,so the whole social thing break apart.Because of this,there's no companies and industries to produce foods and goods,since everyone only look after themselves. So,the world begins to face serious problem for the lacking of foods. In the face of hunger,people kill each other.And since there's no food,they eat each other flesh,fill with blood.Finally,there's no sense of human in people mind and they become a complete beasts,killing and eating others.The world finally face apocalypse just because of a single wish. The wisher never see the world end because he already had become a sushi dish and is eaten by Name,who is also eaten by cats as a raw fish-like dish.(or should I say Nekos.)
The End.

(Peace X))

I wish Kira and L work together to create a new world.(DeathNote reference)

Due to the nature of this last person's with... DEATH NOTE SPOILERS BELOW, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK:
[SPIOLIERS]Due to the fact that they are both dead, Kira and L begin working together in the underworld, forming large organizations of the dead. However, the victem's of Kira revolt against their organizations, and vanish in the underworld's depths. Without them, Kira and L begin planning for a battle with the overworld. They think a step ahead... two steps... three... miles ahead of the war. They go over every possible outcome since they are dead, and now will last forever, they have all the time in the world. Not only that, but their ranks continue to grow over time, as people are dieing. Soon they have the ultimate plan, and know every way it could go wrong, and have perfect countermeasures for each situation. They begin leading their army above the surface, where they begin killing and destroying everything, people die, and turn into the undead, and Kira and L sit atop their thrones of glory... then Kira turns into a dick, and starts going against the original plan, so that he can regin supreme over L. L finds out, but decides to keep quiet about it, perfering to watch what Kira does instead. Eventually conflict breaks out, and Kira and L divide their ranks. Kira has a God complex, and rules his legion with an iron fist, L is more tactful and organizes a large democracy, information is spread among the people, and they all work together to organize it. Kira's own cleverness however keeps him on edge, as their war takes place over the overworld... Little did they know, but the faction that had disbanded from the begining (kira's victem's) have been organizing and planning, and creating their own military, and even recruited many of the people who were just killed in the overworld. They have a now larger army, and can even influence the living to help them, as they work together to drive the now divided and weak legions of Kira, and L. Soon they are driven back to hell, and are condemned and banished into it's deepest depths, locked away foreternity, but everyone died, including the wisher, so they all go back to the underworld as well, and that was pretty much it.

I wish I had a better wish

>>526 You did nice (actually,I didn't expect that X)) but you didn't make a wish,or you forget to make a wish,or you have a connection problem and cause you to not to make a wish. So I assume that you wish a wish of not making a wish,and it is granted,by me. Therefore,you didn't have the chance to wish and this thread goes on. And next time,don't forget to make a wish,which is your own wish,and don't let your chance of making a wish wasted. (I just make this up to move on,sorry)

I wish Sherlock Holmes to exist in this world and solve a crime called "The Mystery of Dollars-bbs.org". (Let your creation run wild!)

WTF is with that wish, but done.

He did, he finished, he forgot.

Let me go have fun for once, and only once, then undo my wish.

bump

Mweh
Pie's wish expired already so I'm just gonna start a new one

I wish a meteorite would crash melbourne

>>531 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

K, everyone there died, then the shockwave killed you too.

I wish Obama did something irreversible then someone undid my wish.

Granted, Obama committed suicide after shooting around ten other people in the white house. And the granter was too lazy to undo your wish. You now live with the guilt of killing the president of america.

I wish I had faster damn Wi-fi,

Granted, you've now got a 5mbps Wi-fi, but it comes with a defect. Every time you try to open something even slightly related to what can be considered harmful contents including manga and anime, the wi-fi suddenly stops working, so you can do your assignments and watch youtube all you want, but you'll live a celibate life free of BL.

I wish it would snow

>>534( I would honestly just jump of a cliff if I had to live without BL.)

Granted, It starts snowing softly out of nowhere where ever on earth it is you live. People enjoy the snow and so do you. But it starts getting colder and every single hour the snow starts falling harder. Till a huge snow storm just takes over the entire country for the rest of the day. This continues for eternity. Two hours of sunshine Three hours of peaceful snow, and Nineteen hours of shit snow storm.
One day you accidentally left nearly every single one of your windows open welcoming a snowstorm inside your house. You die from low body temp~

I wish I could control time by stopping it, rewinding, fast forward Etc...

Granted. To do so, you are given a special watch that can rewind, pause or fast-forward time. However, you accidentally drop the watch and jam the fast-forward button on it. Time accelerates until you hit the end of all time, the end of all existence. You are left alone, floating in a void forever, until you die of dehydration.
I wish I could just snap my fingers and get whatever I wanted.

Granted you are sitting around a campfire snapping for your friends who just finished doing a skit and you are thinking how you never want this silly moment to end and you are now trapped in that one moment for the rest of time ( I don't know if my friends are the only ones who snap instead of clapping for stuff like this but whatever it fits more to a campfire like setting all quiet and such)
I wish I could understand what I'm going to grow up to do

Granted, you snapped your fingers while thinking "how nice it would be if I can skip my exam" but you snapped your fingers too hard and broke your fingers. You got sent to a hospital just the day before the exam so you got to sit it out, but the doctor says that your fingers won't be the same as they were and you won't ever be able to do anymore finger snap.

I wish that balloon would just explode

>>537 Granted
>>538 Granted, Neko.... refresh button is up there for smthg.
You. Understand. You, Understand.

You Comprehend what you are supposed to understand, but you do not understand the meaning behind understanding something.
20 years went by and as you look outside your window you feel nostalgic, the sun still rises from the horizon and sets in the other side, it still slightly covers the top right corner of your window, the school nearby filled with laughter of young children as they waste they youth running around after each other.

You recall those days you used to walk home every afternoon dreaming of what you would do when you had grown up, of what you would do next, but, the world is a cruel place didn't you know?.

"Oh that poor boy didn't see that one coming" you mumble to yourself as your lungs give that one extra effort to keep you alive.

It has been 13 years since the accident, a random one that you could not see or know when it would happen, call it bad luck, karma, the nature keeping life balanced, anything you desire. I call it ... Murphy's Law in the worst way.

A Neko wished a balloon would just explode, but little did he knew that every wish comes with a downside a cruel on in this case, a young boy in his youth was caught in a balloon explosion. It wasn't deadly in its essence but unluckily that boy was just too close to it...

Paralysis to his entire body, neck down unable to move an inch, doctors say it was a miracle, i say it was probably a black cat fault.

I wish i was a foul for once, and stop overthinking things.

I wish everyone on the forum actually followed the guidelines

>>541 THE IRONY

>>540 Granted, you became a nice person, so nice that you became an idiot. You go hit by a car while piking up litter in the middle of the the road.

Watch closely all, because THIS is how you do a real wish, "I wish everyone on the forum actually followed the guidelines".

Granted, Everyone starts to follow the Guidelines and rules.
to The point where they get too serious about mistakes. You one day accidentally do so. And you get shamed to the point where you just commit suicide out of stress.

I wish I could shoot my friends but then undo my wish.

Granted, you shot your friends in the head 3 times and then the wish is undone, but your friends' memories of being shot remained, so they gathered together, wished for revenge, and used you as a shooting target. Just when they were about to undo the wish, the one who can do that decided "no more undoing wishes" so you are now a corpse full of holes and your friends were so horrified that they committed mass suicides.

I wish it would rain all day tomorrow

Granted. It rains all day, until a flood of biblical proportions wipes the entire Earth clean. You now live in Waterworld.
I wish I always had perfect timing.

Granted, your timing was so perfect everytime that you got bored of it later on.

I wish the pain I'm feeling right now would go away. Seriously, it freaking hurts.

Granted. You are now so numb that you could cannot feel your appendix telling you "I'm about to blow up, find a doctor!"

I wish I knew the meaning of life.

Granted. You now Know the meaning of life and all of the secrets that lie within. Now, you know way too much and regret ever making the wish because now you feel that you are scarred for life.

I wish that my friends weren't a bunch of asses and would stop teasing me about my height.

>>549 lol, how tall?

Granted, they died :(

I wish there would be a windows 9

>>550 All I can say is, I'm really short for my age. DX

>>550 Granted, you didn't specify what features it has, so the upgarded version rebelled and kills everyone who touch any electric device through electrocution.

I wish everyday is a perfect weather.

granted, everyday is a snowstorm

i wish coffee would go extinct

Granted, but in its place comes super-coffee, a new variety with 1000x the caffeine as normal coffee.
I wish we all lived in a utopia.

What I actually wish for if that DRRR will become alive, though I know that'll never happen (━┳━○━┳━)

>>554 granted
Step one read the giver by Lois Lowry
Step two you are now Jonas
I wish I had some really really good pizza to eat right now

Granted, Some really damn good pizza pops out of nowhere on your desk. You start eating it but also crying since it was just THAT good. You choke on the pizza and die.

I wish I had better friends.

Granted. They all die in a car crash, and you get a new entourage of pals. At first it's better than before, but as time drags on, you look longingly to the past, to your old friends (who are dead).
I wish I was totally bitchin' at guitar.

Granted. This is you.

I wish I could drum like Cozy Powell.

Granted. You can now drum like Cozy Powell... but you drummed so hard that you drummed your way out into space without a helmet... you know what happens here.

I wish I was in a world filled with me.

Granted. You know live in a world where you are the only inhabitant. Since there is no other humans to procreate with, you just signed the death cetificate of humanity. Smoothe move.

I wish I was a ninja.

Granted, you are now a kick-ass ninja. But with no master to serve, your will slowly diminished until you're driven into despair and committed seppuku

I wish my neighbour quacks can learn to shut up

Granted. They shut up, only to have the most unimaginably annoying noise ever consume your ears constantly. There is no end to the madness.
I wish I weren't sick anymore. (Nope, can't see this possibly going wrong at all).

Granted, You are no longer sick, you happily walk outside for a breath of fresh air. But it was actually raining Heavily outside. You rushed to go back inside but the door was jammed somehow. You start to feel colder and begin to shiver, draining your energy. It took you nearly forty whole minutes to get back inside and by that time you would have already caught a really REALLY bad cold and fever. Surprise! the door gets jammed again. You get stuck inside your house and without any medicine and die soon enough.

I wish I could wind up in Gintama somehow. (This is so easy to corrupt...)

Granted, Gintama isn't a place so I literally placed you INSIDE Gintama. Have fun exploring his digestive system!
...yuck

I wish I had a better computer

Granted, you have a computer so advanced that you don't even know how to boot it up

I wish I had a katana

You did, it didn't end well for your family and friends though.

Can I somehow become God?

Granted, You become a god. And like a god you can do anything. You first just fuck around with your powers messing with physics and gravity. But soon enough you get bored of that. You wonder what would be if you made your own species. Since you lack creativity you just make a copy paste of a human. You give this creation of yours slight moderations. Abilities. like Regeneration and unlimited strength. You start making more of these things and before you knew it you were commanding an army of super strength human copy pastes to take over humanity. They unexpectedly killed everything including your family and "friends". You could bring them back but for some reason you decide not to. You lose your mind to your new found strength. You find yourself crumbling apart the very planet. You destroy anything in your sight. Including various other planets. After you really just couldn't take it any more you just exploded into star dust taking everything else with you. Then the real god just fixes everything three minutes later. Except there is no you. There in so NZPIEFACE. There is no family that you have. There is no trace of your families existence even from the beginning of time.

Well that was fun to type.
Can I meet Aleksander Vinter (Savant) somehow?

Granted. You become his stalker, following him around the world. He eventually takes notice, and since his bodyguards on you. They beat you to death with their bare hands.
I wish I knew what to wish for.

Never knew Vinter became big enough to have body guards..Meh.

Granted, You think of something great to wish for that could NEVER be corrupted. But then you forget.

Is being less lazy so much to ask for.

Acknowledged, your name is now Tom Sawyer

Why don't I have a brother with BL interests. Sigh,

>>571 (not quite sure I'm doing this correctly but okay) Granted
You have a brother who loves BL. He never leaves the house, always searching for more visual novels and other things. One day, you try to coax him out of the house. He considers this a terrible heresy, and murders you.

I wish I could talk to animals. What could go wrong with that?

Nothing :D, you hear the animal's screaming in the zoo, pleas to be let out. But you try to calm them, it doesn't work. The yell to you, saying you don't understand their pain. Once you get home, depressed and all, your mother cooks your favorite food to cheer you up, beef. Then suddenly, you hear the beef talking, screaming in pain. Every bite your family takes, you can hear a scream coming from a slice of beef. It doesn't make sense because they're dead, but your ability seems to still work on the dead.

I wish this board would become a bit more happy :D

>>573 Granted. In order to make this happen, everyone who sees the board is happy with everything until they leave the site. A group of sadists come along who are made happy by gore, and so they begin posting it on the board. Everyone wants it to end but nothing can be done. Because as soon as they look at the board, they are perfectly happy with the way things are.

I wish I could pull of a high quality cosplay without spending all my money.

Granted. You make your cosplay, but only have one dollar left (or one of whatever currency you use... I dunno).

Shit, I forgot my wish. I wish I had perfect luck.

Granted, you are now in Naegi's situation (danganronpa) and involved in a death game.

I wish civilization would go back to what it was a few hundred years ago

>>577 Granted, you get to enjoy the wonders of a lack of electricity, indoor plumbing and women's rights. Since life expectancies are 40-60 years, you don't have much time left, so enjoy while you can!

I wish that our pets wouldn't die, living forever instead.

Granted, your pet becomes an undead that look so hideous that it makes you puke.

I wish flying cars are invented. (Not the levitating ones)

Granted. These flying cars are basically small planes everyone flies. At first it's awesome, but eventually they start to have fatal malfunctions that cause horrific accidents. They are all recalled and scrapped, and everyone is forced to drive normal cars.
I wish I could punch people I hate in the face with absolutely no possibliity of them or anyone else retaliating.

Granted. You punch them in the face, and they die. You are forced to live with the guilt for the rest of your life.

I wish school could be interesting.

Granted, your teachers are aliens

I wish world population would be halved

Granted, WW3 starts, roughly halving the population, two years later 99% of the remaining population wither away aswell due to starvation, dehydration and other stuff associated with a nuclear fallout.

I wish to be happy ^^

Granted, You are happy for ten seconds, then you are depressed for the rest of your miserable life.

I really wouldn't mind getting my hands on a Deadpool game~

Granted. It always crashes at the title screen.
I wish I could make things possible just by saying they are.

Granted. Each one happens in a parallel universe and you never actually get to see it happen.

I wish for fish.

Granted. You get fish. But since you didn't make it specific on how many fish you wanted, you got more than you expected. Your house was then full of them and you had to move somewhere else because of the stench.

I wish that Homestuck would update sooner.

>>589 granted. Page never loads enough for you to see the words, whether it be on someone else's computer, Google Images, or what-have-you.

I wish someone here remembered me.

Granted, no one can ever stop thinking about you ever but everyone remembers everything you do good or bad, every embarrassing moment of your life.

I wish that Hide from Tokyo ghoul didn't die.

Granted. A Spin-off Tokyo ghoul is released and in the end Hide doesn't die but instead he is put into a coma, left with 1 arm and no legs Hide has close to no chances to live.
Ken Kaneki struggles in whether to turn him into a ghoul or not while questioning the limits of its power of regeneration.

I wish there was a pot of gold at the end of every single rainbow.

Granted, but the leprechauns guarding them are so savage that if you even so much as set your eyes on them, they will hunt you down and massacre your entire family tree.

I wish I can speak English fluently without stuttering.

Granted, you can speak english so damn well, that you only ever speak it to show off, but now you can't speak your native language. So nearly no one knows what you say half the time.

Let this awful english accent I have when speaking in my own NATIVE language be gone. Please.

Granted. You now inexplicably have an Italian accent in your native langage.
I wish I lived in the world of Pokemon.

>>594
Since I LOATHE my native country, that will actually count as a blessing ~

>>594 Granted. Who wouldnt want to?

I wish that my Dad doesn't need an operation and that I get good marks on the upcoming exam <3

>>597 Im guessing you meant >>595* Either way you Didn't exactly corrupt the wish.
>>596 I'm glad we can relate.

>>595 Granted, You unexplainably end up in the world of Pokemon.
"A wild Snorlax appears!".
"Snorlax uses falling asleep on you and crushing you".
"It was Super effective!"

Where is that missing can of Coca Cola I can't find anywhere?

Granted. You find that can of Coke... when you get a colorectal X-Ray.
I wish I could shoot lasers from my eyes.

Granted, you got brain hemorrhage by using it.

I wish I'll find a job

Granted, you are now stuck as a Wal-Mart Greeter having to smile and wave no matter how depressed you are because your job barely covers your shitty apartment's rent leaving next to nothing for anything else.

I wish for an endless supply of Kit-Kats...

Granted. You now have an endless supply of kit-kats and become fat as hell. You are over 400 pounds overweight and can barely do anything at all.

I wish that I had enough money to buy all of the fan-merch that I want.

i wish that i had my own luxury private jet and infinite passes to every hotel on the planet.

>>602 granted . You now have all the money you wish for but all the merch that you want is sold out forever.

I wish that I could fly.

You fly and fly, but everything that goes up, must come down right? You fall and fall, a blob on the ground.

I wish I could pass my exams.

Granted, You pass your exams.You run around blinded by joy, and get hit and run over by a car.

I wish I could brutally slaughter my family but not be arrested.

done, your family are all slaughtered and just as you delight in their suffering, one of them used their last breath to take revenge and stabbed a knife right into your heart. You died before the police can arrest you.

I wish I can write 50 words a second without degrading the readability.

Granted, but your fingers fly off the second you type.
I wish I could get into this class I want for next semester with only one seat left...

I WISH MY FRIEND DURIAN HAS A GR8 BIRTHDAY TOMORROW !!!

>>608 Granted, but you sit next to an idiot who does absolutely no work and disregards personal hygiene for the rest of the semester.
>>609 Granted however you forget to go to the birthday party and neglect to even text "happy birthday." You are embarrassed because you now seemingly ignore your friends.

I wish I was a professional magician

>>610 Granted, but you're so professional, that you become extremely famous. You sell out, and then commit suicide due to boredom.

I wish I had perfect grades

I wish Supreme sempai will notice me~

I wish for never having to need sleep to function. Will make my life so much more easier.

>>612 >>613 You Fools. Learn how this damn shit works.

>>611 Granted, You have the absolute best grades in your class. You may have made your parents and teachers proud. But all your class mates are throwing a jealousy fit. They neglect you from then on. You lose all your friends even your besties, since you were so open to brag about it right in their faces. You are forever alone as you know, You commit suicide days later.

I wish my A.C WASN"T a roach dispenser.

I wish i can be an invisible man ;>

^you suck

>>614 Granted. Your A.C. is now a literal spider dispenser. The best part is it doesn't even have to be on to work.
Have fun getting to sleep tonight.

I wish I was having fun today.

Granted, you have so much fun today that you only remembered at 23:59 that today is the last day of your life.

I wish I have better kanji dictionary

>>616 Guess I have to burn my house down now ay?

Granted, You now have a better dictionary. You drop it out the window by accident and it is run over by several cars. Did I mention you also fell out the window trying to catch the thing?

Immunity to fear make it happen.

I'm a cat so I won't die just from falling off a window
Okay, your sense of fear is permanently numbed, but consequently your pleasure sensors also stopped working. Nothing will ever make you happy aga. Not manga, not love, not BL.

Wish I can cook better

>>610 Ha, jokes on you! I didn't get in...
>>621 Granted, but only whe. It comes to cooking human flesh. Enjoy becoming Hannibal Lector.
I wish my boss wasn't such a prick.

I wish I could speak chinese, japanese and korean PERFECTLY
So I could understand the lyrics of kpop

I wish I could be a better freind

>>622 Granted, your boss stops being a prick and instead starts being overly friendly with you and makes you feel uncomfortable whenever youre at work.

i wish the 7th grade weeaboos in my school grow out of the phase.

I wish I knew how to be a normal human. Effortless complacency seems comfortable compared to the constant, fruitless chaos running rampant in my dysfunctional mind...

>>623>>624>>625>>626 All your wishes are granted without any paticular reason, but in the end, all of you will encounter Death sooner or later, so why not now?

I wish these people would learn the rules, follow the order, and help out other members who doesn't get the game.

>>627 Granted, but only if you personally do it. This entails traveling to the homes of all these people and telling them personally how the game works. It takes a long time and a lot of money.
I wish I had more time.

You do, you wasted it here.

I wish i did something

you did, but no one noticed

Why can't I cook fried rice like I cook pasta?

>>630 I don't know, maybe its because they are two different dishes.

I wish that guy knows he wasn't wishing but asking a question

Granted, but it doesn't change the fact that it happened, or that it'll happen again with someone else.
I wish I had a brighter outlook on life.

Granted. Your outlook is so bright that everyone else is blinded,
ending the world.

I wish the people I liked would like me back.

I wish for things
simple things
to grant and corrupt
all for the fact that i messed up

>>634 Wrong thread. Try the poetry thread.

>>633 Granted. Everyone likes you, but they end up taking up all your time with their incessant need for your attention. They start gettng violently competitive for your attention, until none of them remain.
I wish I could get rid of this damned coughing. It's literally the only thing holding me back from getting better at the moment.

granted, your coughing is gone. along with your voice.

I wish I have a higher IQ

Granted. Your IQ gets so large, that you begin to discover things about the world that no one has ever known before. You start telling people about it, and try to get a hold of scientists so that they can make use of it, but people think you are losing it. You begin to get frustrated it, and furiously seek attention for your grand discoveries, and as you keep thinking about it, you keep realizing more and more. Information eventually just begins flooding into your mind continuously, you get horrible headaches as your brain works overdrive to keep up with all the new information flooding in, you begin hallucinating, as your brain can't keep all the information organized and seperate from your actual experiences. You begin seeing hearing feeling, and tasting whole new sensations that have never been known before. Pretty soon your mind is nothing more than a numb fuzzy haze and you have no sense of your body, or location anymore. You are completely lost in some kind of constant stream of information, and you lose your own personality, morality, and ultimately your unique consciousness. You are now just a being existing in nothing more but a flood of perceptions and understandings, that no longer has any kind of meaning.

I wish my pizza was done

Granted, after you take it out of the oven(or microwave, whatever), once you finish up and start to eat the pizza, you find yourself in a room made out of entirely bread, pizza sauce and cheese drip a bit from the top. Turns out, the pizza has ate you.

I wish to have better eyesight.

Granted, Your eye sight is..Slightly better, you still have to wear glasses on the other hand. (Tee Hee)

Allow me to memorise my entire text book tonight. Please.

granted
you have photographic memory just for today and memorized every single letter in the book, but your memory is wiped clean tomorrow just before your test.
..I feel evil

I wish I can come up with more diabolical wishes

Granted, one of them comes true, ruining your life completely.

I wish for wish!

Granted, but it's a monkey's paw type deal, which always ends up worse than you had started.
I wish for... a sandwich!

Granted, The sandwich is actually really good! But you lost your walled somewhere..

I wish for Bacon with cabbace salad..

Granted, the cabbage(*?) was rotten, and the bread had fungus growing on it.

I wish My four idiotic best friends of mine and I are in the same class next year.

Granted you and your friends r in the same class next year but somthing happened over the summer and they changed throughout the year the five of you slowly drift apart and it pains you deeply to see these people you once cared so much about turn into someone you don't even know four or five months later you don't even recognize them any more and all you have left are bittersweet memories

I wish I could stay at summer camp forever

>>647 Jesus, just the thought of that makes me depressed. I don't wanna lose those bastards.

Granted, Next year, While at summer camp you fell down a ditch and hit your head on multiple rocks. You died from the impact. Your horrified friends bury near the campsite. Your ghost now roams that area, forever and ever.

Banish this damn art block I'm stuck in.

Granted. Your art block is gone, but the art you want to make most is deemed incredibly foul, and everyone hates it.
I wish it were tomorrow morning already.

>>650 Granted, It's now tomorrow morning, but now time is progressing at 100 times it's normal rate. This causes you to be unable to keep up with even the simplest occurrences as well as accelerating your inescapable death by aging.

I wish I had 500 million dollars to spend as I wish.

Granted, But how the fuck do you spend people? lol jk.
The rate of dollar drops by an extreme margin and your newly acquired wealth isn't more than a days worth of basic groceries.

I wish days were 36 hours long (instead of 24)

Granted, but your body struggles to adjust. Your performance suffers so much, that you fail your classes and get fired from your job.
I wish this install I'm waiting on would take less time.

Granted, the installation time is halved, but after the install it crashes every time you try to open it

I wish I had a bazooka

Granted, you have a bazooka now, you have no damn clue how it works but you refuse to let that stop you. So you press the gigantic red button obliviously, and the thing goes off all a sudden while you were in your room.
There goes all your BL Novels and merchandise, computer and wall. The bazooka obviously didn't stop there, it went through five more buildings also taking the lives of thousands. It didn't take too long for the police to find you. And shoot you till you became a human honeycomb.

I wish My life was more exciting...

>>653 Installing Fallout4? :D

>>655 Granted, You got dragged into some seriously illegal, dangerous activites, after several shootouts with other gang and the police you are the only person from your group that's alive and not in prison.. A year later, happens and you're at the centre of it all. Few years pass by and the apocaypsy stuff has now ended, however all of your companions that you ever met, loved or cared about have met an untimely demise, weather beceouse of natural or unnatural reasons, and you had to see every single one of them perish. A small while later, you start to recollect yourself, settle down a little, you start thinking that this is finally over, but your wish is still in effect, you manage to constantly get in to wide scale trouble, and throughout your entire life you never meet a single person who survived more than a few months under your care.

I wish for permanent immortality and invincibility

>>656 A year later, INSERT APOCALYPSE SCENARIO HERE happanes and you're...*

>>656
>>657 Granted ...*

Granted, Stuff happens , *APOCALYPSE SCENARIO* happens as well.

As the man who lived to tell the story a Mission is created around you to send you to other planets in a attempt to expand humanity force and knowledge, because your immortal and invincible and the earth status isn't that good, without you realizing since most of the surviving population and specifically the ones that participated on your Mission are not quite smart, your spaceship has a malfunction and it ends up being destroyed.

You are sent off to outer space with just 1 bottle of oxygen (FORGET THE OXYGEN , YOU NO NED NO OXYGEN , YOU INVINCIBLE)
Left drifting in the galaxy you live forever in the hearts of the people who survived the rise of the *INSERT EPIC NAME*.

I WISH i could breathe under water.

Granted, You are now a fish Ladd.

I wish I could stab someone in the throat till I feel satisfied.

Granted. You stab someone in the throat, and boy, it sure was a hoot. Then you get arrested and sentenced to death. Death by throat stabbing. Hope it was worth it.
I wish I could get straight A's.

I wish I can achieve a perfect QPI/WPA this semester!

Granted. You are sent to jail for a crime you didn't do.

I wish that I can travel to my favorite anime.

Granted, you are now in the world of Btoom.
I wish I had a better wish.

I wish life could be like DBZ.

>>665 Granted. You wish for the meaning of life. You find the answer underwhelming, and you become depressed knowing that something that pathetic is all that there is for you in this world. You realise that your life is ultimately worthless, and become depressed. Finally, you kill yourself.

I wish my sleeping pattern wasn't so fucked up.

Granted, You do not have a fucked up sleep pattern anymore. You do not have a sleep pattern to begin with. Because sleeping is something you are unable to do now. Even though that is the case the fatigue still follows you. As you are unable to rid of it you are always tired. It drives you crazy, you just couldn't take it anymore. So you commit suicide days later.

I wish everyone on the face of earth minus me, disappeared.

Granted. You die almost immediately after everyone disappears.
I wish hot foods/beverages were always already at the perfect temperature for consumption.

Granted. Your mouth immediately started curling up and sealing itself permanently.

I wish the next person posts a picture of an elephant. (Hah, effort!)

Granted. The dog's a bonus.

I wish I can be omniscient without my personality crumbling apart