Just venting to people. Wanting to be seen even though my situation isn't even that bad.

I'm tired. I miss my family so much. I knew the choice I made is a hard one and I'm happy that I'll be able to go to Japan but I'm worried something is going to happen to my family while I'm away from them. And sometimes I just feel like I'm just constantly screaming inside to go home. But joining the Air Force is good for me education and career wise. And I've made friends but its just not the same. I want to hug my Dad, I want to bike ride with my Mom. And I'm crying while writing this because I don't know what to do. I had no plan in High school and so I made the choice to join the military and sure BMT was hard but what made it so hard was being away from them. There's so many benefits and I should be happy but I'm just so tired. I just want to start class so I can graduate as soon as possible from Tech School so I can take leave and spend some time with my family before I go.

I'm so pathetic making this thread so I can keep track of my sad typing. I've been in Tech school since 30 Dec 2021. It's been a month and I just started class yesterday. I'm so happy I finally started but here's the thing: I might not be able to take leave to see my family. There's a chance it could happen. And I had a breakdown where I told my Dad that maybe I made the wrong choice so now he's trying to come to see me sometime this month. That is something I'm happy about. I want to just hang out all that weekend but he'll have to leave early so he can get back for work the next day. I'm hoping I do get leave to spend time with my family because the moment I find out that's not happening is probably going to be one of my emotional days. At least right now I'm distracted by class.

You are not alone things will be OK my younger cousin did 2 terms she came home and is now a freaking superstar doing what she wants and family hasn't changed for her just got more connected keep your head up don't worry it will be fine people will still be there for you and even this goofy group is here for you! Don't give up!

You will get your chance to reconnect. Try and make friends within your class, that should help a bit, and you will most likely get some time between when you graduate and when you get placed to spend with them. Homesickness is always going to be a thing, but hopefully you will make connections that allow you to be connected to others in a way it will help you along your day to day.

>>4>>5 Thanks so much.

You wouldn't believe it but I cried today because I saw a Sergeant holding his daughter's hand while they crossed the street. And while I still miss my family, I've been feeling happier with some friends. And sure there are still some times when I have emotional freakouts but I'm feeling more stable. The comradery helps.

My Dad visited this weekend. I had so much fun with him. I had such an amazing time just hanging out with him and playing Uno. He left earlier today because he has work tomorrow and I just feel exhausted. I was so happy that with him being gone I feel unmotivated or just plain sad. I just feel like I can’t breathe as easily anymore. He let me keep his jacket that he wears everywhere so I’m pretty sure he knows just oh how much an emotional reck I am. Looking forward to when he visits me again. Mom is coming soon as well. That’s something I look forward to as well.