Here's what's going on: I am constantly getting pissed at my family over things, and I don't show it ever, because being angry has never helped me and I always do something I regret. So I haven't really yelled or anything in a few years, and I think I am a pretty patient person on the outside. But lately I feel like I'm being tested, everyone seems to be pushing my limits and for some reason I find almost everyone annoying?? Idk how to describe it. But most of all I get really angry at myself sometimes because I do some really stupid stuff sometimes. Like recently I have been forgetting really basic directions that people tell me and idk why. Honestly I'm kind of scared, I've never been like this before and I don't want to get mad, but at the same time it seems like the only way to feel a little bit better. In addition I would feel really guilty if I did because I know that it was probably something that didn't warrant aggression. Any advice?

I thought that I was the only one in the world who felt like this! So I don't know if this works for everyone but, I like talking things out with someone. I have a person that I can trust and talk about all my problems with. If I cry while talking, they comfort me. If I start getting angry and punching the wall, they still stay with me. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, talk it out with someone (or write it down). Punch something if you need to (but something that's ok to punch like a pillow or crumple paper) cry when you want to and I'm pretty sure that things would be alright. And let me say this again, I don't know if this would work on everybody but it worked for me. I hope that this kind of helps!

Hey.

I agree with the person above me and i think it's a good piece of advice.

"But lately I feel like I'm being tested, everyone seems to be pushing my limits and for some reason"

I completely understand you. Something that helped a little bit too is trying to set limits for these people around you. Make them know you are not comfortable with what they're doing, otherwise you'll save that anger for yourself. Let that feeling out of your chest. You could start with small things, until they get it.

Hi! I am so relieved that I am not the only person who feels like this!! I will definitely try both of these things, they seem like they will help! Also, lately I've been sort of trying to quiet that anger, like shove it down ig? Idk if that's a good idea or not but it for some reason it kind of feels as if someone is screaming at me, like that rage has a voice?? Idk that sounds weird haha. Like, I will be talking with my someone and they do something that pisses me off and that voice goes "shut the fuck up" or some other shit like that. It's a little comedic now that I think of it haha, like a an pissed of inner monologue lmao. Anyways what do u make of that? Should I keep doing this in the hopes that I cantrain my patience a little more?

Hm....idk. It depends on if that someone is okay with that or not. The person I talk to let's me do pretty much anything when I'm talking (other than hurting them or those around me) so idk

Hey Ana. I hope you are doing better.
About "trying to quiet that anger" i think the experience that you described is accurate. Sometimes when i get really angry mi head is kind of fuzzy so in order to "calm down" my inner voice starts to take things less seriously. Maybe it's a defense mechanism. Could be related to your experience?

YES THE SAME FUCKIN THING IS HAPPENING TO ME. i think its mainly because i have started interninlyzing my emotions. Thats why you think people are always testing you. My mom broke her ankle and i have a thing for feet. they disgust me. so she bought a heating pad, and i would always give her a look. it was crule, but i would still do it. When it healed, she would always guilt trip me and say, "no other son has ever treated their mother like this. So, whenever i gave her a look, she would say shut your xbox off and go to your room. It was just to make her feel better. I hated it. So now, every once in a while, she will put her gross foot facing me, and give me a look that says "I dare you". WHAT THE FUCK RIGHT??? so now, i thinki am crazy. because when i say "i know what your doing," and ill explain it to her, and she will act like i am crazy .it sucks