I'm 17 and as in the title in contemplating suicide. I recently went through a breakup with a girl that I thought I was going to marry. I really loved her. I said some very hurtful things to her and we broke up bc of it. We tried fixing it and it was going well until her mom banned me from ever seeing her. She only did this bc we apparently "slept" together even though we were across from each other on the same couch. Her mom hates me. Not only that but it's only been a week since that happened and I'm failing some of my college classes. And I have to pay off a citation for reckless driving. I was only trying to avoid a dog. The cops still got called on me though. Now I'm just tired of everything. I really don't see a point in life anymore.

Oof, life can be pretty tough, ain't it? Well, if you really were in love with her and still have feelings for her, I can't imagine that she's any different. Especially when she was trying to forgive you after your breakup. It's her feelings that count - not her mother's. If she's worth it to you, just try to contact her anyway and tell her what you're going through right now. I mean, she won't be living with her parents for the rest of her life... If you died, it would be pretty painful to her, you know what I mean? And she is probably the best person to support you right now.
Also, it's okay if you don't pass your classes on the 1st try. That's not saying anything bad about you especially when your circumstances just suck at the moment. Just learn from your past mistakes, try it again in the future and if it's still not gonna work, try something different. People give too much about college degrees even though they're not gonna make you feel any happier, jeez.
And yeah, dog lifes matter as well. The police is just doing their job, although it's more than a little unfair not to pay attention to your full story. But don't give it too much thought. You saved the dog and you can be proud of that. If you were in the same situation again, wouldn't you do the same? So just pay the citation and keep in mind that it's not fair, but it was worth it.
You have been through a lot recently and I can't blame you for being tired of it. Hell, anybody would be. But if there's something in your life that you still want to do or someone you like to make up with than go for it. Don't leave the world full of regrets. And if it continues to be challenging you can always rant here^^ We'll be there for you as good as we can through the internet.
I hope this helps you feeling a little less lonely :3

Nah she gave up bc it wasn't worth it anymore. Her mom basically controls her life. I also haven't had wifi for the past semester so that just adds on to me not being able to do much work. But now I really just kinda given up on everything. I really don't know what else you do or say. She's also just ignoring me at this point as well. It seems like I shouldn't bother her anymore too.

Hey, fellow college failer here. With no wifi too. I feel you. It's tiring. While I don't have a dying romance, I think I could relate a bit to the rough couple of weeks— we don't have wifi for the forseeable future, I got my 14th ear infection, this thing I got on my nape (a sebaceous cyst, the doctor told me. They have fancy names for inflamed pimples now lol) got larger and before I knew what it is, the only context I had was that my Dad had one and he had to get it surgically removed. We had back to back tests and I've never had a passing grade for the most important course I have this year. The second semester is ending. It's... tiring. So you know, I don't want to tell you to stop being tired. You're entitled to tiredness, because it's just how the body reacts to constant shitty things in a row. If you don't acknowledge how tiring it is, you'll lack awareness as to when the engine is breaking down.

And I don't have answers either, or a solution to the tiredness. I'm still floundering. But I wanted to offer a sense of camaraderie. I don't know what emotional support you have IRL, what your family situation is, or the friendships you've formed— but I found that looking up people online in the same situation who tries anyway helped a bit with the intrusive thoughts; like somehow, they're here, so that means what I'm facing is survivable, isn't it? They are living proof, so that must mean that I can do something to help myself too?

Sometimes the brain lies and that's okay. The brain lies and tells you 'this is useless' and 'you're worthless' and 'just stop' and no matter how logically you try to discern that there's a larger chance of being better if you continue to push, the brain doesn't believe it anyway, because it's convinced itself. But I read a quote recently that said 'you don't have to believe every single thought going through your head' and it's comforting— it's comforting to know that the things I believe and yet hurts me can hurt simply because it is a denial of what I fundamentally know about myself— 'I can still do something' and 'I can get better' and 'This isn't the end'.

So yeah. Recovering takes a long time, and there are some low points. I still recommend calling up a professional or confiding with close friends you are sure you can trust. But you're not alone in this, and as with others who survived it before, we can probably survive it too if we give it another try.

And before I forget— you never truly regress in progress. So don't think that going back to previous practices invalidates what you've worked on before. Now that you know and can identify you're on the same track, the easier it is for you to switch lanes.

It'd be hypocritical of me to say "never give up" because I think it's cheesy. So I'm gonna settle with "let's try again." As a person who's 18 myself... I really don't know how I would've handled this last year.