I was bullied ever since gradeschool but high school was the worst case for me. I had been snobbed by my extroverted spoiled classmates even tho I wanted to help, get laughed at in the whole class, used as a laughing object, gets sworn at without even doing anything, etc.

I wasn't the type of girl who would be liked by those who had I had a crush on.. I don't use baby powder to look fresh, and I didn't care about getting a good hairstyle for a good impressìon since I was once confident that I was pretty and all. But it all broke down into pieces when my classmates picked up on me in high school. One even called me autistic.

Years later I got a boyfriend who inspired me to improve my femininity, that I start to learn how to dress myself up and like girly clothes,learned how to clean my face and body and take care of it (btw he didn't push me or anything it was my decision). Comparing my looks before and after, I can say that I have bloomed pretty well.

Back to the present, I often times put selfies on My Day on Messenger. And everytime those people who were friends with the bullies before(or who were once involved with the acts) are on the lists of the people who saw My Day,or see my posts that I have won on animated film contests (cant remember how or why I became friends with them on FB) I can't help but to wonder what they think of me now, and maybe ask them how they saw me before that made me get picked up on. I always thought that it was because I wasn't pretty enough to be respected, or maybe because I was too weird to be around them. But all in all, I wonder what they think of me now? Is it right to think about it or is it just that I'm not totally moved on from the scar yet? Am I just waiting for an apology for them? I'm sorry if these are just some petty questions, but I hope I could get answers as to why I keep on thinking like this. Thank you...

Sorry to hear what happened to you back then...you still seem troubled about your past and I can understand why.

You know what they say about kids, they're childish, immature etc. since they're kids? I think there is some sense in that. I was kinda "bullied" or mocked at back in high school too for not having stellar grades unlike my peers but I didn't take what they said into heart. I guess everyone is entitled to their own opinion so I wasn't particularly angry per se, more of annoyed at their immaturity.

Looking back, if I were in your bullies' shoes I would feel kinda embarrassed for treating you the way I did back then.. Regret? Definitely, but I don't think it's enough to warrant an apology though. Imagine a 10 year old kid who broke a vase, 10 years down the road do you want him to apologize for what happened back then? Probably not!

Forgive and forget :)

Glad you are doing better, I feel you when you said you were being bullied.