So every year since we graduated from school we'll always go for this annual event. But this year some of them couldn't make it, or maybe even decided that they don't want to come, giving reasons like 'since they changed the location for the event this year, the atmosphere won't be the same... i'm busy with work etc.

It's like we're slowly drifting apart because of personal interests/ career. I would definitely go with them if they asked me out, I view them as my best friends but... they don't seem to be doing the same? I treasure events like these because it's the time where we can finally get together but now it's becoming more and more difficult. Is there something wrong with me? Am I dedicating too much time for my friends? Is this natural?

I've even tried dating apps to make me feel better?? I don't know I just feel kind of betrayed by my friends... we were so close back then, now we're drifting away slowly...I love them and I want to keep them, am I being selfish? I told them to see the big picture, maybe I'm the one who needed to see the big picture??

I'm confused by my feelings...

Do you spend time with them outside of these events?

If not, it is unfortunately natural for this to happen. People change as time goes on. Life gives them different priorities.

However, it is not weird for you to be attached or feel betrayed. It isn't selfish.

I would suggest you to try to hang out with your friends outside of these events if possible. Try to get an idea of what's going on in their lives.

I will put it simply.....


If they are backing up and if they are not your friends anymore, then that means that they weren't TRUE friends from the beginning and they aren't WORTHY of knowing someone as special and kind as you.


you know what? Youre really kind for thinking about people like these when they don't deserve to be thought of.



well, reset your life and ts not too late, make true friends, but don't fall in the same trap again. no matter how much in pain you are, you only live once.

The previous responses have opposite viewpoints, so I thought I'd add my two cents as well so OP might be less torn. I'd side with >>2 – just because you're now drifting apart, that doesn't mean that they weren't true friends from the beginning. Maybe they're not lifelong friends, but that doesn't make the time that you spent with them less important or the relationship you had with them less genuine.

But to answer your original question, I do believe friendships can last forever. They say that the average friendship lasts for 7 years, and after that, it's much more likely to have a lifelong friendship.

It does take an effort to meet up though, so again, I'd take >>2's advice and try to keep in touch with them regularly. Maybe try to see if you can hang out with one or some of them individually too, instead of relying on a huge event where everyone has to come. My friend group can never seem to get all of us together when we plan something, but random handfuls of us meet up spontaneously for something really simple. Like a quick movie or something.

Thanks everyone for your responses! I've got a better understanding at how I should approach these kind of situations in the future. We know each other for about 5 years now, and i'll make sure it'll last longer than the average 7 years! Thanks again for your time and input, really appreciate it!

/sage