I have loved my aunt, romantically, for my entire life, as long as I can remember. We've always had a sort of older sister-younger brother relationship. She would tease me and I'd tease back, and I could trust her. When I was little, as weird as it sounds looking back on it, I would ask her to sit on me alot and I really liked it and didn't know why, and we would cuddle sometimes. Even now I have an amazing time anytime she's around, and I trust her with things I don't trust anyone else with. I really feel romantic and sexual love towards her. Having those feelings is bad enough, but now I hear she's getting married in April. I don't know what to do. I don't live in the same state as her anymore, and I'm going to be leaving the state until at least christmas, tomorrow. I'm only like 16, and she's 30, but I love her so much it's burns! She's gonna be the one driving me to the airport tomorrow as well. I'm worried about telling her my feelings and ruining my relationship with not just her, but my entire family. But if I DON'T tell her, it's gonna eat at me forever and make me depressed like it has my entire life.

She obviously doesn’t have a sexual attraction towards you, if she’s getting married then she doesn’t have them feelings for you. As hard as it may be I would suggest that you don’t tell her that you have these feelings. Your only 16 your hormones are all over the place, you may feel like she’s the only one but there is lots of people out there. You have your whole life ahead of you so don’t worry about it, there will be someone out there for you.

>>2 what is with you monogomy fags and this "only one" bullshit.

Naga Sake best

If you didn’t want support why did you ask. If you made up your mind that you Need to be with your auntie, ask her see what happens, don’t go looking for support and then call the person trying to support you a fag. Maby you should learn some respect, it’s not like I have to help you. You may disagree with what I have to say but, that no reason to call me a fag because you are the person looking for support. Learn some respect.

You could have just wrote, “I don’t agree with what you said, why can’t I be with her whilst she’s with another man.” Instead of “what is with you monogomy fags and this ‘only one’ bullshit.” The way you say it makes people reluctant to support you because, you treat the people who try to support, like shit. The way you replied sickens me, I have no reason to try and support you, I don’t even use a username because I don’t look for validation for helping people. So the least you can do is show respect to those who try to help you.

>>5 sorry mate, I'm using 4chan terms where calling someone an (adjective) fag is just a normal thing. I'm not monogomy so and she's not the "only one".

Anyway when she dropped me off at the airport today I gave her this note https://docs.google.com/document/d/1S6u8XBTXNKCpNdYQUlqfupw0aWbTITWDy8YTXrQNXI0/edit?usp=drivesdk and then pic related happened and she hasn't messaged me since.

Thanks for apologising, I would like to know what happens between you two. Hope things go well for you.

It's funny how people take this thread seriously

ww

>>9 why would they not? Do you not think this is a joke? This is fucking real man!!!I got the tripcode to prove this is me.

>>9 Well Homofem, he’s come to the personal board for support so will take it seriously. Anyone who comes to personal board should be taken seriously.

>>11 this.

>>12 everything should be taken seriously until proven it’s not a actual problem the person is having. So in this regard, the writer of this post hasn’t shown any inconsistencies in his post. Therefore there is no reason to believe that this post is a fake post.

>>13 I hear ya man

>>1 If she accepts, you're fucked, if she declines, you're fucked. By giving her that note, you made a stupid fucking decision; there's no good way for this to play out now, but you've made your bed and now you have to sleep in it. Good luck I guess.

She still hasnt messaged back! Should I message her, or just wait longer?

>>16 You just dropped the biggest fucking bombshell possible on her; give her some time to come to terms with it.

What you’ve done is drop on of the hardest things possible onto a family member possible. Your aunt isn’t going to know exactly how to react to such a thing. It may take a while for her to come to turns with what you have admitted. With all this said,you will have to deal with the aftermath of the event. She may not want to talk to you for a while but, that’s going to happen with what you have said to her. If she reacts negatively you might be able too play it off as teenage hormones, but you may need to wait till your older to play that card. Just wait for know, when she’s come to turns with what you have said, she will contact you.

I think most of us can agree this was a terrible idea...

>>19 That pretty much sums it all up; OP, you're fucked.

So I snuck some of my dad's four loco last night and ended up texting her. This is the response I got. I get the problem with admitting feelings to a married woman, but I legitimately don't get everyone's problem with incest. Honestly I'm offended she would say I need therapy, as if there's something wrong with me for developng feelings for a woman who's been in my life and done so much for me.

So I snuck some of my dad's four loco last night and ended up texting her. This is the response I got. I get the problem with admitting feelings to a married woman, but I legitimately don't get everyone's problem with incest. Honestly I'm offended she would say I need therapy, as if there's something wrong with me for developng feelings for a woman who's been in my life and done so much for me.

It wont let me post the screenshot so I'll just type out what we said.

Me: I'm sorry

Her: Its fine. It is not okay by any means but we will have to get past this. I think you are just confused and I feel that you may need to go to a therepist to talk about it.

[End of transcript]

Confused? I'm not confused, I know my own emotions! Just because it makes her uncomfortable doesn't make me not understand my own emotions. I don't need therapy! No amount of talking to someone specialized in a goddamn pseudoscience is going to make my feelings that I've had my whole life change.

You need to understand that people have different belief’s, she obviously doesn’t have those types of feelings for you. She isn’t into being with someone in the same family. Also it isn’t a social thing to hate on incest it’s because incest damages the children you have. Look at King Charles the 2nd. People don’t like incest because it quite literally causes pain where pain isn’t needed. But what she says is right you need to see someone about it, she isn’t Doubting you feelings for her she’s saying you should’nt feel that way. She doesn’t like you in that way it’s best to move on and forget you ever had these feelings. No matter how hard it will hurt to forget, it’s your best course of action, letting the feelings control you will end up damaging more than just your relationship with your aunt.

She is right, you need help. Incest isn’t a social abnormality because it’s weird but because it’s damaging. Look at King Charles the 2nd. You need to forget that you had these feelings for her. If you don’t these feelings will end up hurting more than just your relationship with your aunt (which will never be the same again). Forget About the feeling for her, if you can’t seek help. As you have seen she isn’t into you, get over it and move on or, these feelings for her (which she rejected) will hurt other relationships of yours.

I’m sorry that you can’t get what you want.
I hope for the best for your future.

/saged

>>25 I didn't want to be with her, I just wanted to admit my feelings.

1.She's infertile anyway
2.I fucking hate kids
3.Again I didn't expect to ever be with her

Seeing a therepist isn't going to change anything though. It's not some Deep rooted issue or anything, I just like her. I don't see how a therepist is gonna change anything. Out of everything in this sitaution THAT is thething that's upsetting me. Also if you're saging my post you don't need to say it outloud, that's just a dick thing to do.

How you wrote both the original post and your post about her reply, implied that you wanted more than to admit your feelings. I quote “but I legitimately don't get everyone's problem with incest.“ “I really feel romantic and sexual love towards her. ”this implies you want more than just “admitting your feelings.” Also your aggressive replies have proven otherwise.

None the less, I wrote sage there because I already bumped it to the top with the previous post I had wrote.

regardless of the whole shit-show that has happened in this thread, I would recommend talking it out with someone other than your aunt: it's obvious that you have a lot of mental hangups with her & I think discussing it with someone might help.
Just remember, no-matter what anyone's personal beliefs on it are, it's still illegal in the US

>>26
You should not force your obviously disturbed/hormone fuelled thoughts onto her. She clearly does not want any kind of romantic or sexual relationship with you, and you need to fucking grow up and get over it.
She is your aunt.
It is both incest and against her wishes.
She made a helpful suggestion and you throw it in her face.
Stop bitching about the fact that your married aunt does not want a morally wrong, incestous relationship with you. It is not okay. The fact that she is infertile and you don't like kids changes nothing.

>>29>>28 I want to make it clear that the only thing morally wrong about it is the fact she's marries. And again I dind't expect to be in a relationship with her, I just wanted to tell her because it hurt to keep my feelings in. The fact she told me to get therepy hurt me on a deep level. Honestly I thoughy you guys at the dollars would be helpful, but you keep talking me down an dbeing rude too!!

Naga sake, therapy does have a bad connotation both in the present and in the past, but there's nothing shameful about therapy. Going to a few therapy sessions doesn't mean you're some deranged weirdo.

Your aunt probably suggested this because she doesn't know what to do about the whole situation. She obviously sees incest as something bad, and she seems to want to help but wants to limit interactions between you two, since she sees herself as part of the problem (being the "temptress"). Now, in her opinion, the "victim" (I'm putting quotation marks here because I use the words "temptress" and "victim" very loosely since I can't find a better words for them, btw) needs to be separated from the "temptress" and needs help from a specialist, the fact that you're a minor probably doesn't help.

An example, even though you might not like it, is the relationship between an abuser and his/her abusee; long story short, you have to separate them and help the abusee to understand that it's not his/her fault.
At least that's what I gather from the situation. Obviously I might be wrong, since I know only a fraction of the story, and I do understand that her proposition might of hurt you, but that was most likely not her goal.

Try calming down a bit, and try viewing the situation from her point of view; imagine if, in a few year, one of your cousins told you something like what you told to your aunt and all the problems that arise from that attraction.

P.S.: I think most of the other dollars are annoyed due to the fact that the delivery of your feelings for your aunt didn't give her much leeway on how to deal with the situation. And the fact that you seem to keep a closed mind, now I'm not trying to be mean, but you should try keeping an open mind and a calm demeanor in touchy situations like this one. As Nietzsche would say, "Those who cannot understand how to put their thoughts on ice should not enter into the heat of debate".

Anyways, good luck on achieving a peaceful conclusion to your dilemma and I hope my comment (even though it's quite long) will help you in some way. :)

Just to be blunt, if she is instigating this behavior that's an issue of hers too.

Also, you're 16. I remember being 16, and loving someone strongly for years (we also had the same type of relationship, although we were not related and there were only a couple years between us), I never said anything and now he's married (and, yes, the whole time I still had strong feelings for him). And yes, it hurts and you have depression. But as much as it hurts, keep it in. Heal. Grow up (I mean that in the kindest way). Move on. (Last two go hand-in-hand.) You'll experience worse things in life, you're only 16. You have so much of life left to experience. You'll get older, look back at 16 you, and laugh. I know it doesn't feel like that now, but I've been there. If time doesn't heal it, you'll just get tougher.

(Also, to view this from a scientific standpoint, your hormone levels really screw with your mentality at 16, and your brain is most dysfunctional during this time. So, just try not to do something you'll regret in the future.)

Whatever you've told her at this point, just don't burden her more than she already has been. Think about what your relationship will be like with her (and her husband) in the future. And with the rest of your family/relatives. No information is private in a family, haha. You don't want your current actions to have negative impacts on your relationships in the future.

The best thing you can do, is just focus on your future, and let time heal whatever emotional damage you accumulate along the way. Things will get better (and worse) throughout life. I'm not saying you are doing this, but just make sure you don't make everything else in your life currently, and in the future, impacted by this current circumstance. Life is more than romance.

Also, to add to what others have said, more people should embrace therapy. It can be immensely helpful for all areas of life. (Just go to someone with an MD.)