I want to play with a human body. Especially if it's someone I like or any other cute girl really. The basic hugs and kisses would be the opening. Sex is optional. What's important is the insides. God, I just want to cut them up and just.. Sigh.

Any of you can relate?

Well depends on how deep you want to go. A little blood and pain is always nice and all but sadly those fetishes works better in theory than practice.
And well you don't want a person you love to be in constant pain or a life threatening state.

Look yeah many people have those fetishes and they are most noticeably the usaul phsycos (according to news and dark web) but honestly there is such thing as just any innocent person with these fetishes, so dont feel bad with them, and if you really really want to have them happen your gonna need consent, that all I have to say on the subject

And when I say with them, them refers to the fetishes not the people with fetishes

Unless u can find someone who has the same fetish as u or loves u so much that they're willing to let u cut them up, a sex doll is your best bet here. Though u have to order a custom made one to have organs placed inside her. Reminds me of a video I watched where the guy has a fetish of becoming a vampire- his girlfriend lets him suck her blood through her throat. Btw he uses a penknife not his teeth.