Hello everybody,
I'm in an almost 5 years relationship and live together with my boyfriend...but a while ago the feeling of not loving him anymore becomes stronger and stronger and I feel like I cannot move on at all. I really do like him and he is my best friend but I cannot imagine to kiss him or anything like that. It feels so wrong to me to do anything like this. For him, he always tells me that he loves me from the button of his heart but I cannot answer his feelings anymore... I don't want to loose him but I also don't want to lie to myself (and obviously him too) anymore. He made many mistakes in the past and he did everything to make up for them but I cannot think about a future together. It would breaks his heart. Every conversation we had about it ends with tears and mental breakdowns on his side. Like "nobody ever loves him the way he is".... or "then I can die if you dont love me" and stuff like that... It really makes me angry and I don't know how to live with this.
Another problem is,because we live together we are somewhat depending on each other... like he pays for the apartment and I pay for food and daily stuff... we cannot afford to live somewhere else and it feels like I cannot go away from him because of this...also I dont want to lose him as a precoius person...

I don't know if I managed to explain my situation and I don't know if anyone is willing to read this but at least It helped to write about it. :) Thank you.

You're in a tough situation where it's like sort of manipulative I definitely would seek the device of family possibly maybe try to meet new friends at work so you aren't isolated or possibly a help center group/support group because you definitely got yourself in a very toxic relationship even if you can be good friends I think he's not at the point where he's not going to be accidentally manipulative and you are clearly unhappy

Thank you so much for your reply. Yeah I really dont know what to do. He really did a lot for me so I guess, either way I will be the bad person, because I left him "ungrateful"...

i get your feelings rentaou, just don't give up. you believe what you believ and you make your own way. you have self-confidence and that's what matters, youll see more people respecting y ou for what you are and how you are. what i can say is: don't give up and don't go downand don't let yourself drown because of wh at people say or think because it is the most fatal mistake that you could ever do.alright?

If you don't feel happy,then leave him. but since he's special to u ,u need to look for a good way to say goodbye. Also tell him to go make friends with lots of ppl