The day before Valentines day, my girlfriend of five and a half years left me for a 33 year old man with two kids as well as in a relationship with the mother of his children, before this, they had been "friends" for only a few months, but she only told me that I didn't have anything to worry about with him, because they were just friends. Now that she's left me for him while still in a relationship with the mother of his children, he is going to abandon his family for my ex which he manipulated to her her away me.

They destroying lives and families with their actions. Four days ago, her and I were fine and everything was going well, but then the next day he shows up and they've been gone for three days now. This wrong and my heart is fucking obliterated, but how can I allow this?

I'm enraged, and filled with panic and confusion and sorrow.

Our relationship was abusive, I never was able to make a lot of choices without her becoming furious with me and either hitting me or screaming at me until I gave in, so when she left, I understood and even though it killed me inside to let her go, the relationship was toxic. So I understood that this was a healthy choice, and I wanted to stay at least on good terms so i wanted to support her in whatever she did.

But.. I didn't learn about the manipulation and the games until just tonight. My fucking soul is shattered... But beyond that. She needs to come home because she can't be making these choices this this guy..

I'm so upset and confused the I'm dizzy and I'm nausous.. How could anything like this happen?

...she needs to come home.

Sara, please come home...

Hey, if you could give me some of your time and read this, I think you should rest for a while and think things through. Even if you long for her, even if you're convinced you need her or she needs you, give yourself some time to calm down and think properly. I don't think you'll ever feel relieved in a toxic relationship such as that. So if you want to talk things over with her once you see her again or find her, it would be much better for both of you.

It's a good thing to understand each other first thing. And by understand each other, I mean aim to see what's bothering her and how to help her free herself from those worries or whatever caused her to leave you for such a cruel person. And of course she'll learn how to do the same for you. But if it just can't work, and if she's just that type of person who wouldn't be convinced or won't listen to the voice of reason if you tell her to come back, I think it's better to let her go. It's too much for you to tire your mind constantly and feeling suffocated about it. If you don't mind me saying, I think you should really give yourself a break and let her go. Sometimes there ae some people whom you're better off distancing yourself from and just forgetting them because that's just how it is.

I hope you're going to find a solution to this soon enough and finally be able to be happy though. I'm only saying it because I know how suffocating it is to be in that kind of relationship or to have known someone blinded by a certain desire and you can do nothing about it. Please be well.

Well in a way it is a good that you witnessed that, sort of like a karma revenge thing. I would have loved to see instant karma like that in one of my cases.

First thing you gotta do is make progress to love yourself. Only then is life meaningful and enjoyable. I never loved myself until about 23. I was abused as a kid and I had it drilled into me everyday that I was a piece of shit and less than dirt, which got to me. I subconsciously thought that way of myself after all the beatings and degrading. I never realized how much it affected me till I started to deal with all of my problems.

Once you start to love yourself you have a whole new perspective on life. Of course it is easier said than done. It took me about 6 years to deal with my problems, but it was worth it.

First off you have to let this person go, as their is no good that can come from taking them back. Next is focus on yourself and make amends with what you did in the past, in other words live with yourself and what you have done. Next would be to start finding out the other problems and deal with them in your own way. Mine was writing to find out my problems, since I can organize my thoughts better that way.

hey don't fret my good man if she was getting angry at all of you're choices she was too controlling so think of it this way you are liberated from the shackles of the she-devil who fell in love with a pedo