I’m not sure how to phrase everything...but I suppose I’ll start from the beginning.

I have a small group of friends from school. Yes I understand schoolmates don’t last forever, but I’d rather live in the present than in the future. Altogether, we are a great group that some people may envy. But...whenever we are split up, I feel like nobody wants to talk to me or just be with me in general. Others notice that I’m excluded from my group. Whenever we have the chances to work collaboratively, I don’t want to ask any of them because I know they have friends they prioritize more. Especially when working at home, I always need help but I don’t want to sound too needy. I don’t need help as much but I like to ask clarifying questions. They help each other, but when I need it, nobody’s there. I don’t know if I’m just a bad person, if they don’t like me, or if I’m hanging out with the wrong people at the wrong time.

We always reassure each other that we have their backs. I always go out of my way to be there for them.

This exclusion from my friend group has started to get to me. I’m so self concious about myself and who I’m with. I’ve cried over the stress of schoolwork and nobody willing to help me. My different emotions have probably built up from school stress, social, and family issues which is why I cry at such minimal things...what is wrong with me?

The stress is understandable. You might even say it's reasonable due to the circumstances. I read a study the other day that says vague relationships tend to take the most toll on a person. It says that even having enemies would be better because you know where you stand with them and they with you.

Perhaps that's why these things have built up. And I wouldn't call those things minimal. It's painful because it feels like you haven't received in measure what you've given. That's hard and okay to accept. Take a deep breath.

I'm not sure why your 'friends' are acting the way they are either. But if it's something you did or something they did, I'm sure it's worth a shot to get to the bottom of all this. Chin up! If it's none of those things, and a matter of mismatched personalities, the route is open to explore new connections with other people. <- though that's hard too.

In any case, you do you booboo. It's a rough world out there but you'll be fine...eventually. We also kind of subconsciously communicate to people the way we'd like to be loved, y'know? This goes for you and your 'friends'.

Big hugs all around, Kaneko. I hope you figure things out and most importantly, feel better soon. Feel free to explain more.

Okay, first I don't think anything is wrong with you. The thing is, if you feel like you're being excluded. That's probably because you are. Whether accidentally or not. What I suggest is be upfront about it. And however they react to you telling them you feel excluded from them would most likely tell you whether or not they actually are your real friends.

Because, if they are real friends then they'd feel bad about it and make sure to include you when they find out that they haven't been. Because they'd care about how you feel.

And if you find out that they actually don't care about you all that much (or at all), then...well, personally, I think you'd be better off alone.

This is from personal experience. Now, I don't know if you'd end up feeling the same way, but I found out that its actually better to be alone than to constantly try to chase people who don't even care if I'm there or not. At least when I'm alone, there isn't anybody I'm hoping to be there.

I've found that being alone, was actually a lot less lonely than trying to keep friends that don't care enough to be.

And hey, you'll find friends who truly care about you. All you have to do is be yourself and the right people will eventually show up. That's what happened to me. Of course, I also initiate conversations and things like that. But when I find that the person actually doesn't like me all that much or we don't really "click", then I just distance myself from them. Its just easier and takes less toll.

In any case, that's just IF those people actually aren't real friends. Because they are people too, and people tend to not notice when they are doing something sometimes, until someone tells them they are doing it :)

I totally understand how you feel. I always feel like I am purely hate and my friends keep secrets about me. I feel like I can be replaced. I even get depressed over it. However that’s ok. It’s ok to feel sad about this because if your friends don’t care, you shouldn’t either. You deserve so much better and more. And you are not truly alone. We are here for you. Also from personal experience you should always be you. If people don’t like you because of who you are well they are probably weird. Holding on to something is much more painful than letting go.