1 Name: Cat : 2017-07-07 01:51 ID:Y0CQRdhP [Del]
Heres whats up
I have this friend,lets call them Bird, who i have been with for coming on 8 years now.
we meet on a chat line and became friends then learned we lived close by and decided to meet eachother. Its been fun but...for the majority of the friendship they have honestly been clinging to me.and its getting worse. Almost stiffling. I do care about them however i almost fear for them due to this clingyness.
Im quite a bit older than them(7years) and have essential unintentionally taken the "older sibling" roll for Bird. And that is not an issue for me. Im happy to help them and guide them but just like a chick Bird is getting to that age where they need to start learning to take care of themself.their homelife is not exactly the best hence why i help where i can and i can tell they are struggling threw their classes. And even now i can see they will have/are having issues "in the real world". At the same time...i want space for them but like a duckling they keep following me. I dont want to hurt them but i do want them to basically take 90 steps back and help themselves. What do?
Bird is incredibly sheltered and i know just kicking them to the curb would devistate them and mess/flair up their "issues". Iv been trying over the years to adapt them to a not as sheltered life but i can only do so much. Especially after we both moved and Birds family issues started getting worse. Please help
2 Name: Am : 2017-07-10 07:13 ID:8oO1iLE1 [Del]
Be truthful and say it before it gets to messed up is what i would do,might be wrong
3 Name: Cat : 2017-07-12 12:25 ID:Y0CQRdhP [Del]
Well im worried that if i flat out go "i feel you are being very clingy" they will end up depressed (again). Iv already tried to get some distance in the form of limiting/not role playing with them (seeing how it is our favorite pass time) and they are already freaking out over that.
4 Name: Nomad : 2017-07-12 12:32 ID:0ujRssH+ [Del]
Personally from experience, tell them just that, be truthful but still be there for them, just let them solve the problem on their own. That is, if I read the question right, I'm sorry if I didn't
5 Name: Raizo : 2017-07-12 22:15 ID:7xPOJyr9 [Del]
For situations like this since time wise it has been going on for a while it gets a bit harder especially taking age into consideration. The best thing you can do besides explaining to them easily that they need to find another way to ventilate besides you would be to suggest things for them. Like trying to as them how they would feel like joining a club or a sport. things like that make it easier to make friends and create a sort of safe haven for people. This should help them add more options besides clinging to you.
Sorry for the long explanation..
