Hello there,
I feel like I'm going back to how I used to be in the past. It scares me because that's how I lost friends and people I cares about. I feel lonely like I want to talk to someone I know and am comfortable talking with. But nobody is on at the moment and it's making me feel kind of lonely. I know I've been without talking to them for awhile when I was with my father but I'm with my mother and I'm now allowed to speak with them. I tried contacting them but they don't reply. I'm worried sometimes that they've forgotten me or stop using the social media I'm using to contact them. Another thing that's worrying me is I am nagging at the man I love when he's really down. I've been wanting attention from certain people but never gotten it, him in particular. I've been wanting to help people, but it seems no one wants my help. I feel kind of left out of things. Even in chat rooms, so as a coping skill I've been playing video games, yet now that is not working. I just need someones company... So far I've been listening to music which is helping a little. I realized now how anti-social I am... I just don't feel quite in the right state of mind. I'm starting to say things that is weird. Idk is it a problem?

Feeling left out and alone can drive you to realizing a few things you probably have never noticed before. So, no, it's not a problem. It's something that happens with everyone naturally whether they notice it or not. And you feeling alone is no different. I'm sure it was said somewhere that 'humans crave the contact with other humans'. By 'contact', I don't mean it in the physical sense but more so under what you've relayed openly in the verbal sense. So that in itself proves that it's a natural reaction to when feeling left out or alone because you are not on proper speaking terms with those you are most comfortable with. What I suggest is to just absorb the time you have alone with yourself. Sometimes being alone isn't that bad because it allows you to really focus on yourself and think for yourself when all you want to do is be with others. If you chase after other people so often because you want to be able to grab their attention, you neglect yourself and forget about a few things that are most concerning in regards to you. I know this may sound a little bit confusing, especially since you want the comfort of being reassured in the general speaking sense. But I'm serious about the whole 'take your time out of time' sense. Being able to take things in by yourself is a good thing for you too. It really is. And eventually, that in itself will open up ways getting you even more comfortable with the idea of being okay with not having to want to speak so openly with others or just talking with other people you're familiar with. It'll build you a path that strengthens your character a lot. Though I must say, I apologize if this doesn't help with anything. For it is a bit of a warp in understanding.

Yeah but what if you once been alone for months and finally you come and talk to them. I have had time to think about myself. And it made it really even more difficult for me to talk to people.

If I may ask, why was it difficult? You've clearly thought long and hard to know the reason for it to be so, which brings me to ask why it is so? Who do you think is making things difficult? But more importantly why? This is what I believe is making this predicament a bit harder to understand. I mean that by no offense. Though it is a bit unclear when one tries to unveil it. Continue if you wish.