Dear N,

It's barely been a day, and I don't know what to do. I keep thinking about leaving E. I keep thinking that if I leave E, even though you've already left, you'll still somehow accept me into your life. I'm very possibly wrong, and I've already lost you, and I'm afraid that if I leave E, you'll think it's too late for you and I. I attempted death upon myself multiple times. E has only ever hurt me once, and even though you've hurt me so much more, I still miss you and love you. I can't figure it out, but not being around you makes me want to die. It's possible that these feelings will fade with time, and it's possible that they'll never disappear. I feel empty and hollow and I want to cry, then sometimes I get a sense of calm where I shake uncontrollably, and I just think about you. I can't handle being away from you, and I don't know if this feeling will ever fade. I need to know that if I leave E, it won't be too late for you and I. I want to come over, and return your ring. If I don't get an answer soon, I'll come over and find out the answer. I'm slowly dying without you, and it hasn't even been a day. I don't know if this feeling will fade, and I don't want to lose you forever. But I fear it might be too late. I fear that you've already moved on, that you've already forgotten. I don't want to be forgotten, and I want to be with you. I just need to know if I leave E, is it too late for you and I? It's possible you'll never read this... I'll probably chicken out when I go to your house, and end up just giving you your ring with tears, then leaving not wanting to feel the pain. It's possible you already hate me. I have shared so much with you, and you have shared so much with me. I don't want to lose you forever, and if you think it's too late for me to leave E and be with you, all I can do is hope that we'll be friends in the future. I don't know how long I'll be alive, and I don't know if maybe one of my attempts at death will actually work some day. But I don't want to give up on you just yet, even if it is too late. I don't know when I'll see you again, I don't know when my question will be answered, and I don't know if you even still care. I need to know, if I leave E, is it too late for you and I? I love you, N. I know you don't believe it, and it may be too late for me to make this decision, but I love you. I can't live without you. And I don't know if these emotions will fade, it's possible they might, but I can promise that I'll never forget you. If it is too late, and you never talk to me again, just know that I love you. And please don't be sad if I turn up on the news someday. If it does happen someday, know that it was my own fault and my own emotions and my own self that drove me to it. You may have made me feel great pain on more than one occasion, but you were just doing what you thought would be best. And there's nothing wrong with that. I may be in a lot of pain right now, but it doesn't change the fact that I love you. If my question never gets answered, just know that I love you. I hope the life you choose makes you happy, and I hope you find someone amazing and perfect for you. Just don't forget about me.

Sincerely, A thorny rose that made her love bleed just a little too much.

Dear Nobody,

I've found a new method. I'm done. I'm far from my fairy tale ending, I've hurt someone I love, and I'm empty. They think I'm a bitch, which is a lot less worse than what I am. I'm a burden on everyone, and I'm going to find a way to end it for good. I don't deserve life... I've given up on hope, and the person that said they love me and said they will always be by my side, said they are leaving forever. So I guess this is goodbye for good. Anyone who may know me, I'm not going to say sorry for this. And you can't feel bad. I just need to leave this world before I destroy more lives. Don't expect a reply from me if you try to contact me, and just know that this is going to happen. It may not be tonight, but I will find a way to make sure it happens. This is goodbye forever. Unless something happens at some point before I can find a way to die, it will happen. There's no stopping me from doing this, and the only person I know that even has a possibility of reading this because they use this sight, couldn't care less about me at this point, because I hurt them. It doesn't even matter how many times they hurt me, because I know what I did to them was so much worse. It's time I leave this world for good, and stopped causing so much pain. It's time for my place in hell to be filled.

Sincerely, A broken heart that deserves worse

You are going to live so help me God.
Its funny really. I just scrolled past this post and didn't see anything on it, so I refreshed and saw that you had added more.

So I just gave it a read and I am here to tell you that you NEED to live.

Hell, maybe we could go through this together?

I just lost my girlfriend of 3 years+ and decided to try and find some peace on this website, and instead found similarities.

I doubt our circumstances are anywhere near the exact same, but maybe go into a little more detail about it? Maybe I could help in any way.

On here, nobody knows who you are and nobody knows who I am.

The only thing that is almost a given on the personal boards, is that we care. And we are here to help.

So if you can spare some time and reconsider your attempt to permanently dissappear, please. Talk to me.

I may never know who you are, but I care.

Please don't kill yourself. By killing yourself the pain wont go away, it only spreads futher to those people around you - to freinds and former freinds, to colleagues and people you meet in your daily life. Even if it appears like no one cares there are people who do care even if they don't show it. Killing oneself doesn't take the pain away as much es we'd like it to so please go on living.

Everyone makes mistakes and hurt people in the past. That is a part of human nature. Everyone has a dark side but also - and that I am sure of - a good side. YOu have one too. You are not beeing a burden to anyone by having feelings. That is a part of beeing human as well. Nobody is perfect, which is human as well. No one deserves hell. You certainly don't. Yes I don't know the whole story but that is what I truly belive in. The good thing about life is that we can learn from mistakes and improve or help others with our experience. You have a reasen to be here even if you belive you don't. Maybe It'll just take a while to find it so please stay her with us. Stay alive. You are a part of our community, you mean a lot to us like everyon else on this board. We do care. I know I can only beg you but please give Life a chance and keep moving no matter how hard it is. I now you can. You are way stronger than you think you are. Everyone deserves life, you do too even if you think you don't.

On a site meant for being anonymous, it becomes shocking to say the least to know or have the feeling you know someone here. I saw what you posted yesterday but for some reason I couldn't reply... last night I visited you, hoping with every inch of my being that you hadn't left this life, and when I saw you wake up and hold onto my arm my heart skipped a beat.
Typically I wouldn't even be responding to one of these messages the way I am right now. But I want you to know how much I care, how much so many people care... I really do appreciate the two other users that posted when I didn't have the courage to. I hope that we can sort things out and be happy once again... Right now you're with E, and I'll always be by your side if things don't work out. I gave that ring to you as a promise: Until you've moved on from E, I want you to have that ring to always remember me by, and when the time comes where you and I may finally be together, I'll accept it wit open arms. But that doesn't mean that I'll leave you. I could never bring myself to truly ever leave you. I love you. And that'll never change...

Love, N

P.S. We sing. We dance. We steal things.

It's been a while since I've been on this site. I'm still here, and it's all because N is in my life. I don't know what I'd do without him, and I'm finally happy, now. I have certain points in my days when I stress out, but I can honestly say that I'm happy. I love N. My life feels so much better with him in my life. I'm happy I stuck around long enough to see the outcome, and I couldn't be happier with how things turned out.

Sincerely, A not so broken heart