Okay before I start this let me just say that the Dollars has been nothing but good to me. I've made a lot of friends on here and I'd just like to personally thank you all. I love you guys and gals.

So it has been difficult lately. Well, it's always been difficult, just a lot harsher. I have sleep deprivation. I'm taking a full load of classes at my college. It feels like i never have enough money. I feel like I'm not enough for my family. Even when i'm trying my best to help them, it still doesn't feel like enough. I feel like shit.

Now, I'm ranting about this because i know there are thousands of other people that feel the same or even worse, and i hate it. I am sure there are people that would love to be in my situation rather than the one they are in, and i want to do nothing but help others, but their are times i can't and i almost hate myself for it. I have all this built up bullshit from over the last few years and i don't know if i can keep it in anymore. I'm tired of not being able to sleep or not being able to eat just because i feel so...i don't even know the word. Sad? Angry? Confused? And that's what sucks. I don't know what the fuck i am feeling. I just feel like nothing. And i'm tired of feeling like nothing. I really am.

Sorry for the ranting. I'm sorry to my friends on here. I just needed to be alone in the quiet for a while.

It's just fucked you know..

It's all just...fucked.

I have some sleep deprecation too and I'm kinda the same way where my parents aren't satisfied with me. I would probably recommend at least five hours of sleep at minimum and I would try to find a good time to talk to someone about what you feel. If you wana contact me, feel free to send me an email at cooldud3.dollars@gmail.com

>>1 Hey Ghoul! So I can't really say I know what you're going through cause we all have our different struggles. But I did want to let you know that your friends on the Chat know that you just need a little alone time right now, and that's fine. Focus on your life for a little bit and see if things get back under control. Also, if you ever need support, know you can always DM any of us or rejoin the Chat and we'll all love on you. Good luck man!

>>1
Hey Ghoul. My girlfrie - ah shit. EX-girlfriend, now, I guess, is going through the same sort of thing you are. She just has long periods of time where she goes completely emotionless. She doesn't understand it. I've tried to talk to her about it, but it never ended well (Hence, ex-girlfriend). I'm really sorry, but I don't know what to do to help you, but I'll usually be there if you want to talk, as a fellow Dollar who has a tough time getting to sleep. My email is
remus.dollars@gmail.com

I'm a grad student and I can definitely relate to your experience. I was having minor anxiety attacks because of life dropping some major bombs on me in addition to huge loads of schoolwork.

I also felt guilty thinking that 'there are people out there who have it far worse than me so I have no right to complain.' But this invalidates our painful experiences. No one wants to feel pain and wanting to avoid that pain is a natural response.

I am currently working towards my master's degree in clinical and mental health counseling and what helped me was actually getting counseling from the college I attend. If your campus offers it I highly recommend visiting the counseling center (if it's free). It's hard to describe the relief of talking to someone who cares and will not judge you.

For the record you aren't nothing. Take it from someone who's felt that way a few times themself.

Hey there. Firstly, you are not nothing. There are times when there is so much on our plates that we shut down, and cease to think about things or feel things because it's just too much to for us to comprehend fully- but that just means you're human. Feeling (or not feeling) that way normal for someone who's been doing as much as you, but don't let it make you feel as though you aren't enough. I can tell from your post that you are working really hard-too hard even. And from seeing all the effort you're putting into everything you're doing, I can tell you that you are worth more than you can imagine.

But, that doesn't mean overworking. Take care of yourself. You may not be able to lighten your course this semester, but try for the next one. Even if it means studying less for a test, or not re-revising a draft of an essay, try to sleep more. Often that helps more than extra studying would. Eating healthy is extremely important. Food gives you energy for the day, and not eating right can cause you to feel listless.

There are thousands of people who feel like you, and are possibly are in worse situations. But that doesn't invalidate your situation at all. If anything, it gives you a group of people to talk to, share advice and experiences with. Try to find people who have been in the same situation as you and talk to them-like us! That can help a great deal more than you'd expect.

I hope you feel better :)