Okay so a few days ago I ended up being sick vomiting into the toilet hanging over it for a while my mum came up and screamed at me to go to school while I was being sick and I told her I was sick but she didn't believe me she then walked into my room took all my consoles and my pc away after a while she just yelled at me saying there was no point going into school so I went to bed putting the bin near me just in case I was sick again but thankfully I wasn't sick again but when I asked my mum if I could have my stuff back she screamed at me no because if I couldn't be bothered to go to school I couldn't have my stuff even though I was actually sick so in a fit of anger I walked up to my room and punched my door a few times (This is what I do to get rid of anger when I don't have access to here) because of that I got sent to my granny's for the day but after a while when I got home I got all but one of my consoles back and got my pc back but when I asked for my other console back she says she threw it out because she had snapped because I got angry which only made me more angry at her but now I don't know what to do I don't want to live with a woman who cares more about punishing her child than making sure that they are actually safe and health part of me wants to leave and part of me wants to actually kill her I just don't know what to do

One question, are you a gaming addict?

Yeah I'm a massive gamer

That's probably the cause.
Children aren't the only ones who feel neglected you know. Parents can feel neglected by their children as well. She might feel like you're paying more attention to games than you do to her.
Not saying it's a bad thing, but before you start claiming she doesn't care for your safety maybe talk to her a little bit?

It took her 6 days to ask if my knuckles were okay and she still believes I was lying about being sick

And besides if that was true why would she give me my other consoles back

Your mother sounds like trash.

Is there anyone else in the family there to support you during her tantrums?

Are you getting any anger counselling for that punching thing?
Because you definitely need a better outlet than self-harm and property damage.

Lonely people do crazy things.
Oh well, just bear with it til you graduate and get a job.
Better than dealing with the law system.

>>9 Fuck those excuses.

Well my only other outlet is here and gaming and my family well I don't see a lot of them my granny says that we are both as bad as each other and no I'm not getting any counselling

>>10
I don't know about America or other European countries, but I'm 100% sure neglect is not even considered an abuse til the parents actually start hitting or other kinds of torture.

>>11
For gamers I recommend therapeutic games with philosophical values instead of actually going to therapy. Because the first thing the therapist is gonna ask you about is your gaming habit.

>>11 It's your mother's responsibility to be an adult in these situations regardless of how you behave. You are a child. You're allowed to be upset at how you're treated. You're allowed to have fits. You're allowed to not be okay sometimes. It's supposed to be your parent's job to step up and get you the help you need, especially when lashing out is the only way you can get them to notice you have a problem.

Your mother's also allowed to not be okay like any other human is, but for the years she's responsible for you, she needs to get that taken care of (so she can ensure your issues are worked out too, since she's the only one you're able to rely on). The fact that you're not getting any sort of counselling despite your behavior is a red flag that her mind is elsewhere. Does she have any physical ailments that are occupying her time/money right now?

I'm not saying to do anything now, but in the future, try to observe the people around you a little more. Point out your support beams. Be a little friendlier with the adults in your life and family. If it turns out that this isn't just a rough patch and it gets bad, talk to one of them or a school counselor, etc. and let them know that you honestly want a second opinion on what to do about your situation.

Never take, "put up with a toxic environment 'til you move out" as an answer, because that isn't one.

>>12
>neglect isn't abuse unless you hit someone

Think again.
You'd be surprised how much indirect neglect you can sue a parent for, as well as how "little" is considered abusive, at least here in America (though it varies from state to state).

Don't be a prick to your kids.

Neko do you know any games you'd say are therapeutic or have philosophical values and no she doesn't have any illness or anything to be brutally honest she's just lazy

>>14
It is. For us. Not for them.
Tell me, will the social workers even bat an eye?
For example, in my country (Indonesia), try that and you'll just get thrown onto the streets. Law enforcement won't help btw. I don't even know if there's such a thing as social workers. Probably not.
Since not everyone lives in an ideal environment, can't hurt to think if voicing out their complains will get them more trouble than it's worth.

>>15
What consoles do you have?
For PCs I'd recommend visual novels (not the ecchi kind)
Try "Rewrite".

The exact same thing happens with my nephews, on a daily basis. They get their leggos and other toys taken away from them. I don't sympathise one bit. Because they like to fake it whenever they can, and when they're really sick no one can tell the difference except me. But they get lectured and screamed at by everyone, I'm definitely not going to stop that.

Then my nephews come to me later saying that they're parents don't care about them. True. It's because you made them that way.

What happened to kids with a bit of integrity? I never thought they could be so stubborn about not wanting to go to school.

Of course, maybe your situation is different. I can't assume the same thing happens with you. But I can't say your mum just randomly goes berserk with no previous instigation.

>>14 Neglect here becomes abuse and only worthy of a report if the child dies, unfortunately.

>>16 >>18 Fortunately, that's not the case in America. Parenting is a right, not a privilege, and you're expected to behave civilly as an adult here. It's a shame so many still insist on behaving like trash.

Not that it changes any of what I told OP. I never recommended involving the legal system.

>>18 The discipline they're receiving is obviously not the right angle for them if they keep doing it and have only come to the conclusion that their own parents no longer love them. That's asinine.

But hey, not my culture, so I can't say much.

>>20
The one thing I can never stand about America: everything from philosophy to familial love turns into a battle of "human rights"

I'm not from America I'm from Ireland