I really need advice. My friend attempted suicide last week and I found that out just yesterday. Apparently they were discharged yesterday and they texted me to let them know. I won't make excuses but yesterday I really just couldn't get back to them. This morning I got another text saying that I was one of the big reasons they chose to kill themselves. I'm not going to lie, it hurt, but I really do blame myself. They said it was people like me that made them feel like they didn't have any real friends and that they felt used. It honestly was never my intention to make them feel that way and I only feel worse about it.

I feel so horrible because they had been constantly hurting themselves and talking down on themselves, and many times this happened right in front of me. They would hit themselves and say how much they hated themselves. I tried to help the best way I could think to do, but sometimes I was too scared to say anything because I was afraid that it would only hurt them more. I contemplated calling someone to help them but again, I was afraid. I don't know if rehabilitation centers are free and I think they would hate me more than anything if I called a rehab. I know that's selfish of me to think. I know they are more important and I want to help them but I just don't know how. The text I received this morning had a threat they should slit their wrists again. I feel absolutely awful and I'm panicking and I don't know what to do. Please, just help me! I don't want them to hurt themselves again! It's been killing me that I didn't act sooner but I'm scared and I just need help with this. What should I do? I don't want to be too late again!

just make sure that you stop them when they are hitting themselves and say things like "but I don't hate you" and REPLY TO THEM

Mweh, so positive. Were you born this timid or are you just that easy?
Just before you do anything, you should really ponder whether they really hate themselves. Some people are suicidal for a whole different reason than they claim.
The way I see it, people who hate themselves won't flaunt around that statement or use themselves as hostages to get other people to pay attention.

>>3 I don't have time to ponder this. At this current moment, the reason doesn't matter, what's more important right now is making sure that they're safe. I want to know what to do to help them, not spend more time thinking about why this happened. That can be talked about when I know that they're safe. And I'm sorry that I'm not as brave and confident as you are behind a fucking screen! If you're not going to help, then why bother commenting on this thread?

Because this is a BBS? Ofc ppl are gonna comment shit.
If you just want to make sure they're safe then go to a hospital and get them into a psych ward .
You said it yourself. If it's really that urgent, why the need to hesitate?
Or alternatively you can have a heart to heart talk with them and convince them to at least let you hear them out before they do anything stupid.

I think it's commendable that you want to help your friend, Kc. It's hard to say what the best way for you to do that is, since these situations are each so unique. It does sound like your friend very likely needs professional help. However, telling them that you care and that you want to help is likely the best thing you can do right now.

That said, I feel that I should warn you to be careful. Very careful. Your friend is suffering and (probably subconsciously) he/she is lashing out to make you suffer as well. This is sadly not uncommon. Often when someone tries to rescue a drowning victim, the victim ends up pulling them under and both are drowned. I don't want that to happen to you here. There is an obligation we each owe to each other as human beings, and there is a special sense of duty between friends; BUT at the end of the day you are not responsible for what your friend does. Loving someone always opens us up to injury, but don't go too far. Keep yourself safe, physically and emotionally. And don't try to do too much on your own.

If you need any encouragement or advice, I hope you'll feel free to post here again.

@Neko: Many of the things you say are sound, but much of their value is lost because of the way you say them.

>>6 You used a semi-colon incorrectly; you're the one who needs to work on how to say things. You have no right to be patronising.

It seems to me that you're less concerned on losing your friend but more on someone dying due to your actions. Are you sure this obligation to save this 'friend' isn't just out of guilt? After all, how would you hurt a friend unless you weren't even that close to begin with? Are you even real friends? How well do you know each other. Ye.

Wut, if he can't handle a little sarcasm, he can't handle talking to a suicidal person.
Both of them may speak english, but the interpretations are very different between a healthy mind and a not so healthy one.
Best to be as blunt as possible to get the message across.