Got a messed up story to tell? Maybe just a funny story that will brighten up someone's day? Maybe it's just a story ya want off your chest and not chasing after you in the dark? Well, here's the right place!

Decided to make this thread so all of the Dollars can enjoy in the stories that are told by others. Whether they are funny, horrible, enlightening, or just straight up weird!

So place, come share your stories with us, so that we may take pleasure in your words.

*DISCLAIMER* Parental Discretion Maybe Advised.

So allow me to beging. I personally ran in to a deer. Not with a car. Not on a bike. Not in a go-kart. No, I literally ran in to a deer on foot. It was late, I was drunk off of Apple Pie Moonshine, and was running to the bathroom across the field(family and I were camping that weekend). Next thing I knew, BOOM, ran in to the side of a deer. My siblings were behind me and they saw everything happen. I then got up, and headed straight for the bathroom like nothing had happened. Mind you, I had to use the facilities BAD. To this day, my family won't let me live it down. Only thing I can live proudly about that situation, is i finally surpassed my dad in something....stupidity.

Not my own story but it's one that just must be shared nonetheless.

Year 9 (think 13 years old) and some of the kids in my year become "inspired" by the Jackass movie series. Yup. Inspired by Jackass. You know you're in for something good when it starts with this.

Well they weren't just going to do stupid stuff on their own, oh no. They were going to film it and put it on youtube. Which is how I know this is 100% true, I saw it with my own eyes. And before they removed the video maybe a couple of other people did too.

"Ah, we can't trust you, the video doesn't exist any more." Nah ah, hang on, just keep reading.

So the video starts pretty daft. One of them jumped off some sort of high roof. A guy standing on a wheelie bin and another one comes and boots it over, the guy on top tumbling over and off. You know, normal stuff that kids get up to every day.

But is concussion enough? Gosh no. I remember overhearing them in French class talking about how they'd like to stick a guy in a bin and then drive a car into it. Because when you're 13 and under divine inspiration, no idea is safe enough.

So you get the idea, they're into stupid things. Right, cool, come on Lycanrising, what's the big deal here?

Ah, but wait. I haven't reached the finale yet. Episode 1 of their short-lived series ended rather spectacularly.

A spatula was heated up over a gas stove. A metal kitchen spatula, one of those grill patterns. Heated until it was almost melting golden yellow. Their pants were down and they were bent over. He took the spatula off the flame and went for it. A lifetime of regret in a single second. They'd barely been touched before the screams started and they all made a dash for it. In cannon they all jolted right up and took off like some part of them was on fire.

So these 13 year olds have just had their arses branded by a bloody household spatula and are sprinting through their house, pants hanging low and a cackling camera man following them. See, they'd decided to take special precaution on this one and fill up a bathtub with water. Safety first kids! They run upstairs, dive into the bathroom and practically jump butt-first into the water. Does it help? Oh god no. They were still shouting and crying as the clip faded to black and the credits rolled.

The video was taken off youtube a day later, the editor kept saying that he "wasn't happy with it, it needed to be better" but he never uploaded it, or any other ones.

So, story over? Not quite. Years later (maybe when we were 17) on a school trip to alton towers castle I was in the communal shower room finishing up from my showering and one of the guys who had been in the video steps out of the shower butt naked and turns to get something. I wasn't staring at his arse intentionally but he turned and I saw what I saw. What did I see? A clearly imprinted set of grill lines etched nicely into his left cheek.

I wonder what his pickup line is, "Hey, can you guess where I've been branded? Wanna check it out? Yeah it's a spatula. My mum's. No, my friends did it to me. Drunk? Nah, super sober. No, where are you going? It's a real brand! It was hot, don't you find it hot?!"

So there you have. One stupid idea, some jackarses and a lifetime of butt-hurt.

Not my own story, however, it's one of my all time favourites and I want to share it with you guys.

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.

Approaching the boy, he asked, "What are you doing?"

The youth replied, "Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them back, they'll die."

"Son," the man said, "Don't you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can't make a difference!"

After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish, and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said,

"I made a difference for that one."

-Loren Eisley

this is interesting

>>1 huh....just noticed my own type, my bad. I was hungry and hands were shaking XD
Meant to say, "So please, ...."

>>2 That is fucking great,lmao XD I had a friend brand themselves with a smiley on their hand before....

>>3 Definitely a neat story Heona! Says that even the small things in life matter!

>>4 hehe, enjoy all our stories ;)

In junior high, my friend and I were preparing to leave after the final bell rang. It was shortly after testing, where the teachers allowed us to eat snacks to keep our energy up. This is a conversation my friend and I had. I'll call her Novella for now.

I was putting all my stuff into my backpack when Novella approached me. She and I started talking and she closed my top locker door when I appeared to be done with packing... I wasn't done. The peanuts were still in the locker.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY PEANUTS!" - That was what I said/slightly yelled.

Novella will never let me live that down.

- And that concludes my story. I still have those type of moments, even years later. I'm such a fail. XD

This child was once born into the world with cocaine in his system. During his birth he lost oxygen but still managed to survive.
Because his mother was a crack he was imadiately taken away from him after the birth. His father was never to found and I doubt either of them truly loved or wanted him.

For the first 23 months of his life he was moved from foster home to foster home. There were times where he was even found being fed orange juice instead if milk and having scratches on his skin. Because of is poor expirences with human being much of his emotional, physcal, and mental development had been delayed.

He was later placed into the care of his maternal grandmother. Though she tried her best to care for me..she failed miserably to do so. In her care he suffered child molestation from his older sister. He also went on to be very aggressive towards his peers and his siblings. It was not uncommon for him to cause serious injury or pain to others around him.

Despite his rage....he had love in his heart. You see he had only been hurt....the good little boy was still there...still intact..
On day his pre school principal inspired him to be a better child..... a good child so that everyone would love him.

Unfortunately most of the adults and other children in his life went on to despise him and treat him like a monster. It is ramified in his begavior as an adult today.

Middle school.

A brief time in his life. This time he was a different person.
He wasn't aggressive but he shied away from most people and remained hidden from others during lunch.

He participated in chorus. He enjoyed singing even though he was teased and controlled daily by his bullies in his class.
I don't care to explain how. umm... what else

High school.....Fuck 9th grade was alright. He got a 3.5 gpa and participated well in his cross country team.

That summer though he failed at committing suicide.

10th grade his grades went down and he started ditching school.
The dean constantly threatened to through him in jail for not having good enough attendance.
His grandmother was spending money at the casino instead of on his health and needs.

He got into politics. Found out about how fucked up his countries surveilance policy was and he wanted to make a diffrenece. He started to lurk around the internet and he unfortuantely found the stupid fucking asshole dollars bbs where they mostly treated him like fucking shit.

He then went on to treat them like fucking shit. Then he felt bad. Then he left. Came back...tried to be nice. Got delusional again... fucked up. Yeah you fuckers know the story.

Needless to say though he did grow a lot. I mean a whole lot. He got smarter ..more insightful and more spiritually powerful.

Right now he's failing at college. He's waiting to become a poolee for the marine corps so he can go off and just kill mother fuckers.

Really he's just a waste of human life. He wishes someone stronger, smarter, and more capable could of took his place on planet earth instead.

I say this to myself.
You sorry mother fucker.

I say this to you.

Good grief. This is how I'm paying for the consequences of my actions. Keep firing.

>>6 lol i had something similar to where a friend had stayed up with me all night just after my car wreck. I started dozing off at some point and she said something along the lines of the monkies are stealing your cake.... well.... my response in my half dozed state was a drawn out "nooooooooo~!!!!" And i apparently reach out as well.....

>>7 damn thats a long ass story o.O

So this was a couple months ago. Me and my friends were playing a friendly soccer match. The friends house we were at didn't have a big enough back yard so we were playing in their cow field out back, and now I'm sure you have an idea as to where this story is going.

My pants were loose army cargo pants because at the time I didn't have any other clean ones. These pants were also 3 sizes too big and had trouble staying up. As I run down the field and make the most beautiful goal you've ever seen in your life, they slide down and trip me up. And that's not even the worst part!! Oh no, not even close. I fell face first into a fresh cow patty. And then the guy I've liked for two solid years commented on my embarrassing underwear.

Here's a story: When I was in grade 4 my class and some others went down to this forest place to learn about carnivores, herbivores and omnivores. We played this game where we were one of the three, and had to chase each other in the forest to get our "food". While some of my friends and I were running we weren't paying attention and ended uo going far beyond the boundaries. Just to paint a picture, this place was huge. It had two parts: the safe part, and the part with all the animals. We had accidently left the safe part and ran into the wild area. While we were running, one of my friend's foot got stuck under a rock and would't come out. It took three of us to get her foot back, and she had a hard time walking after that. That's when we realized something was wrong. We tried to go back but ended up getting lost, and decided to just walk in a straight line in hopes of finding someone else. We eventually got back and were very lucky we found our way back the time we did, because the game had already finished and they were getting ready to leave. It was kind of scary because the whole time we were asking what would happen if we don't get back.

>>9 awwwww, guess that would have been a day for better underwear? =(

>>10 hehe been there Hiraita.... it's a scary thought getting left behind in a secluded area that you don't know.