My mom was talking about a cousin she started talking to again, they were close as children she started hiding her phone which was weird because she's not a very secretive person. I finally snuck a peek and she called her first cousin babe. I confronted her and apparently they're dating. Thoughts? I'm weirded out and sorta lost respect for her. Idk if it's really that bad of a thing, but it's weird to me. Opinions?

Personally, I think that's very gross and I'm glad you brought that to your mom's attention, but apparently a lot of people for some reason have no problem with "kissing cousins."

It's definitely strange for people to date their cousins. (And since your mom tried to be secretive about it, she probably knows that too.) It's not even just society's standards, I'm pretty sure that biologically, humans aren't supposed to be attracted to members of their family. It's our way to prevent the crossing of overly-similar genes and all that stuff. So yeah, I don't blame you for being weirded out. I would be too.

Are you sure your Dad isn't your Mother's brother?

The problem is she's cheating on your father (But if your parents aren't together anymore there is no problem)
But they shouldn't have kids...

Yeah they're divorced. Doesn't make it better though.

The only part that helps it is that from what I read their relation ship was strictly emotional. Thank God.

i cant give some sorta advice but ill just say this ''the fuck'' i know what you feels but she is your mother, right. so show some respect but i am not saying that you should support her or anything just dont brag it

In some cultures "kissing cousins" or having an attraction to your cousins is pretty normal. I myself find it normal to be in love with your cousin, even your 1st one. Like I said, the only difference is culture.

Has she been watching1 too many anime? Crispin Freeman talks about getting an email from someone dating his cousin in the Us where it is illegal. The only way cousins can marry in some states, is if one or both are past child baring age/ability.

Well, if they're happy together you probably don't want to interfere but this is the sort of thing which could cause family disputes. Because of this I doubt it'll last too long so if it weirds you out just try to put up with it for a while, mate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvGRIV-N86Q

>>12 And that links to...?

Uh, Shizou on the subject. :) As I mentiones in my previous post C Freeman on this.

>>14 oh... Disappointed.

As long as they don't procreate, it's perfectly fine if you look at it from an objective point of view. It's an absurd thing to do in the eyes of society, but everyone has their own circumstances.

I'm going to clear a few things up. She justifies it by saying it's not my business. She tells me she doesn't care what I think about it. She's against things like gay marriage. She says people may not be able to help who they have feelings for, but they can help whether or not they act on it. So this whole ordeal is not only weird but hypocritical. I, at the age of 14 cannot date, while her at the age of 48 can randomly start calling her 1st cousin babe. I've notified my older brother at the age of 22 and he agrees with almost everything that I've said. We live in the state of IL where currently it is considered incest, seeing that they are legally too closely related to marry.

>She's against things like gay marriage. She says people may not be able to help who they have feelings for, but they can help whether or not they act on it. So this whole ordeal is not only weird but hypocritical


It's not hypocritical if she's standing by her beliefs; you've already said that she hasn't acted on these urges.
Now listen, at first I thought that you had a reason to be bent out of shape, but now I keep thinking "Man... Get over it."

I hope your brother had already known, because frankly she's right; it is none of your business and spreading it to family and friends is wrong. If it was just to us guys anonymously on a random site, that's fine, but if you've been telling anyone irl... It makes you look like a jackass.

I'm not sure if you missed the large debate in the Random Thought thread about incest, but a surprising number of members don't care, and felt that incest was between those people and it was fine as long as they didn't procreate.

When you can hear them fucking through the walls of your home, /then/ you can come back and complain some more, but there isn't even so much as skin ship going on here so chill.

If my mother and her 1st cousin are sexting (recent info) then I think I now have a damned right to be upset. If my mother decides she just wants to up and date her cousin why would I think that you could empathize? I should've gone to a forum where people who know the actual situation. If she's ashamed of it enough to hide it, then she knows it's wrong to. She doesn't just, *have feelings for him randomly* either. After her divorce she hasn't dated. 13 Years without a relationship and you're lonely. I guess I should have made a proper post explaining her better. And yes it is hypocrisy if she says a man and a man or a woman and a woman can't get married or have relationships, but then can go around and date her blood.

It's not me being a jackass for telling people, it's I know my own mother. She's ashamed of it and she has about 5 people care about her in this world. She's lonely.

And desperate for human relation.

>>19 You yourself initially said that they weren't dating, so now I'm not sure what to believe. If the sexting is new info...does that mean you've been invading her privacy and checking her phone? Once again, it's none of your business. Treat others the way you would like to be treated.

>>20 Really? Cuz it /sounds/ like you're only purpose in telling people is to belittle, embarrass, and force her to stop.

>>22 Ohh wait, I misread something. So they consider themselves as "dating" but strictly over the phone and nothing physical? Ohhhhh I get it.
Ha! You're fucked. I know it's difficult, but just let it go.

Double morals, that's a reason to lose respect, if you ask me.
But still, as mag says, it's none of your buisness. You aren't even directly affected unless you invade her privacy. You can change your opinnion of her, but interfering would simply be wrong. She has different opinnions, and you, despite being her child, have no need to feel obligated to change those.

She wants to move..

>>25 in with...her cousin...?

Or does she just want to move because she's afraid of your mouth blabbing to everyone? She could lose all her friends and her job.

Piss off, I came here for an opinion from people not to be criticized on how I'm handling it. I'd be deleted if my Ip didn't change every time I posted.

And she couldn't lose her job from someone having a personal thing against her this isn't 1960.

>>28 You're naive as fuck, aren't you? You could lose your job just from your sexual orientation (if you don't believe me, look it up). You think you can't lose your job (and friends) if all your coworkers and people you knew heard about your romantic/sexual relationship with your cousin?

>>27 But... Those are still opinions. (Lol) And you never answered the question; did she ever say why she wants to move? I was joking about the "in with her cousin" thing, but not about how a blabbing mouth about such a secret could seriously uproot her (and your life).

I'm the naive one? XD that's tough shit seeing that most of this was b8.

if they are related by marriage and not by blood it isn't really a problem, is it? That just sorta makes them childhood friends...

If they are related by blood it is a little strange and considering that she was trying to hide it maybe she knows it and this is just a short term thing and will move on...

>>30 If you're trying the easy way out, it's not working, you'll have to face opinnions even if they're criticism. At least if you bother to read all of the comments.
>>28 She can. At least in the beautiful state of 'Murica!

OKay! for me and where i come from this is a very normal thing, cousins can marry and have children in the arab and muslim world ! But i know that in the west it is somehow disgusting and weird! All i can say to you is try to accept it, maybe she really likes him, try to open up to the idea a little bit !