Heads up, it's a bit of a read.

Alright, so yesterday while I was at work I got a text from my cousin. She informed me that my girlfriend (of almost 5 years) had been cheating on me in the form of "sexting" with someone I had thought to be a friend. At first I dismissed it as rumors until I saw the words from the guy himself. Allegedly it never got physical, but still.

Now, here's my problem. This supposedly all happened quite a while ago (somewhere between 1-3 years ago). What I don't understand is why it's getting brought up now. See, I had personally found that she was messaging a different guy on facebook in the same way back then. I found it, confronted her, and we moved on. When I confronted her yesterday she told me this happened around the same time. What I'm struggling with is the fact that she didn't tell me about this guy. I already knew one thing was happening, why not fess up? I mean, even if it did happen back then, how can I trust that she's telling me the truth about it now? I thought we sorted it out yesterday, but it's just lurking in the back of my head now. I've only recently been able to tell her I love her after the first incident and now this shit happens? What do I do?

"What should I do?"

Man up and break up with her.

Only sexting my ass. No doubt they've seen each other naked. She's been playing you, and is t the least bit sorry about it.

I agree. You don't cheat on the person you love unless you don't really love them. It may be hard to hear but it's kind of the truth. And when they try to pull that excuse like: 'You don't give me enough time' or 'you changed' or any of that other bs, it's just some way to make you never leave them or feel bad about yourself for thinking you were the cause of everything. But my question is, "Why should you feel like you're to blame when they're the ones going around fucking who knows who?" The guy above had it right: "Man up and break up". There are others out there who can genuinely love you, and it may not happen right away but that doesn't mean it won't.

Agreed with the other two guys. It's kind of hard to break up with someone, but sometimes it's for the best. As Seiji, the guy who helped me earlier today, said "If you ever doubt that a person is right for you, they're not", and this is a hell of a reason to doubt. So just take a deep breath and finish this. I really hope you can get this right, man.

i go by the philosophy once a cheater always a cheater. Move on to someone more faithful. The good people deserve better. It's that simple.

>>2>>3>>4 You guys are unforgiving :O
Every human makes mistakes, and if I had a girlfriend that confronted me after finding out I did something like sexting, I wouldn't tell her that three years ago (I'm serious, this happened during that same time) I did the same thing with two or three other girls. I aam a completely different person now, and I wouldn't want the ones I love see every bit of my dark past.
I probably wouldn't do something like sexting when I'm in a relationship, but honestly, it's not that big of a deal from my perspective. If my partner then tells me that he hates it, I'd stop of course. Just because you're in a relationship you don't have to stop every little aspect of flirting with other people, it can be fun as long as you don't go too far, it can result in great friendships. Flirting excludes sexting, I just want to say that she's allowed to talk with other males.
Also, since you confronted her about that one guy, she probably didn't want you to hate her even more for it, so she decided to end the sexting with the other guy silently for the sake of your relationship.
Of course, all of this loses it's value if she does it after you pointed it out. But that didn't happen as far as we know.

Oh, I got the story completely wrong! The way I undesrtood it, I thought his girlfriend was sexting again, not that it was around the same time.
That being the case, I agree with ShinAttha. Altough I think sexting was a big mistake, this is simply a matter of perspective. If you cannot accept what she did, break up with her. But, as Shin said, she might be trying to help the two of you. Trying to be the best. I think that, if you can still trust her, try again. And, if she repeats the mistake, say goodbye and find someone else that you can really trust.

That's kind of the conclusion I've arrived at. Granted, it was a huge breach of trust, I'm giving her one more shot to earn my trust back. Next time I'm done and she knows it. I've put a lot into our relationship so it's hard for me to just be done being that it was a long time ago. Thanks for the advice everyone. I really needed an unbiased perspective.

>>8 Sounds reasonable^^