well, it simple i know i'm not cis gender. At the moment my gender is queer and well now i'm starting to think i'm ftm trans and i got no idea... pretty much just wanna talk with someone that could help. i don't know anyone to talk too.

thanks

if you need help then you need to be more specific about how you feel about yourself.

I may not be the one to talk because I've never really doubted by gender but..Does it really matter what gender you are? I mean it might just be me but with the way stuff is going right now, lesser people are going to care about what gender you identify yourself with. As long as you are not hurting other people while you make yourself happy, go for it.

It's really strange how I feel about my self. I mean I like having a flat chest I'm meh ok with my body. But at the same time I just see something people expect form me. It's complicated cause I see my self more as a boy, but yet I want kid and I was to carry then but I don't see my self as a mother. I hate girl fashion (fashion freak in my own way) but like on my wedding I wanna be in a dress. But at the same time I hate it. I got this love hate relationship with my body pretty much.

And too me being seen as a boy, called with male pronoun and my male name often makes my day. Cause I seriously hate my fem name and I hate being threaded and like I'm weak.

i have a similar situation... if you haven't i would recommend that you research a couple other gender identities, especially gender fluid, or ones that don't fit the typical binary. obviously i can't give you advice from experience... but i hope you figure it out...

WTF MAN! At most you can not know your sexuality, but gender? Just look down and see if you have a dick or pussy, why bother making a thread?

>>6 Sex does not mean gender. Genitals are an indication of sex, not gender.

As for OP, I can somewhat relate. I'm physically female, but most of the times, I feel like I should have been born male. I wish I was flat chested, but other than that, I am fine with my body. I do go by he/him pronouns around my friends and sometimes use a male name, although I do like my birth name. And while I mostly feel like a boy, there are some days I feel like both and others where I'm fine with being a girl.

To help you out a little, I'll give you three genders as a starting point.

Bigender: Having two genders; can switch between the two or be both (this is what I identity as)

Genderfluid: changing genders

Agender: lack of gender or no gender

I hope I could help you. While labels aren't for some people, I know I feel better knowing that there's a word to describe me. You can continue to identify as gender queer or find one that fits better. It's all up to you. I wish you luck!!

>>6 like EpicKT mention. Sex is between your legs. My sex isn't my gender. Why bother? Simple. I am at a point that I am so confussed that I can't sleep, eat, focus, it's making me sick, depress and extremely anxious. Not knowing your identity is for me one of the worst feeling. This is sadly a part of it and also gender is someone that affects people around you in your life.

>>7 EpicKT I so understand your feeling of having a flat chest. I like it more that way too. And thanks for your help.
One thing I wish I could have is a much lower voice and a more define jaw line.

>>6.... hush it. I'm not a boy or a girl 100% of the time.

>>8 Best of luck, I know it took me a while.

>>10 ........What?

>6 If your just here to judge and yell at people then why are you posting in the first place

>1/4/7 I understand how you both feel. I myself dont identify with the gender Binary identifying with the terms genderfluid and genderqueer. I know how you feel since I sometimes am perfectly fine with my physical gender and sometimes identify with the opposite although most of the time I am somewhere in the middle or outside of the spectrum prefering to go for androgynous or extremely feminine male ( you like pretty boys or shoutas that kinda thing).I tend to prefer male pronouns to female ones but some days i really like female ones. I wish there was a common english neutral pronoun but theres not and I personally am not a fan of making my own and trying to get people to use it, if other people do thats fine just not for me. This is why I like male pronouns since typically in the english language if the gender is unidentified then the male pronoun is used so it feel more androgynous to me than female pronouns. It takes a while to figure yourself out and will feel like once you pick a label you have to try and change your self to fit it and thats not true . Just be yourself and the words to describe it will come in time. From what you said though it sounds like your similar to me with genderqueer genderfluid with more of the time being on the masculine or male side ( yes you can still be genderfluid and queer if you have a preference even if that preference matches your physical sex. being a girl 10% a boy 60% and somewhere in between 30% doesnt make it any less valid you dont need to have a perfect 50/50 girl boy thing or you dont always have to be off the binary. ( the ratios I used are just random number examples) Again things are complicated but they get better. Genderfluid and queer are nice terms because they are very open ended so you dont need to specify to others or your self in what way just yet. I hope you can figure yourself out and feel comfortable in your own skin ( literally and not mentally) and i just wanted to let you know that your not alone.
-Kuronaii~☆

Forgive me, as I know this can be a matter of great importance to some, but I have a rather straightforward opinion about this.

As far as humans go, we're either born a male or a female. I think any male can do anything a female could do and vice versa. (For example, pro female fighters that could destroy most living men in a fight) In my opinion, gender roles or trying to escape a gender is dumb and always has been since humans became as intelligent as we are. Worrying about fitting in and pleasing others by wearing a dress or not is just extra drama that no one should bother with. Just do your best to become a strong individual that can accomplish whatever you want.

I understand your point here but to a lot of people gender is a huge part of who they are. Someones gender may not match their expression but it also might.It is an important part of who they are and figuring themselves out. Its not so much of an importance on the physical part. The thing with physical expression is two different parts. The first part is that for some people it feel good and can be very fun to express their gender in physical terms such as clothing or hair or makeup. The second part is that for people who dont match their physical sex completely the physical expression of their gender is the only way for them to get others to recognize and treat them in the way that they like. While i do agree that everyone should just treat all humans equally regardless of gender but most of society doesnt, thats just the fact of how it is. If someone who's gender is female is born male and wants to be treated as a girl with female pronouns and just the gender way people treat girls then they will dress in dresses to amke this clear to others. While I would like to have you just be able to say I am a girl and that be it thats unfortunatly not how it works a lot of the time. And yes while treating different genders differently to each other for example society expects men to be brave and girls to be quiet and gentle so they often will either be kinder and more helpful to girls or give boys jobs because they belive them better qualified. Like if a girl looks lost most often people will ask her whats wrong. ( these are just examples and not always true) While i think it shouldnt matter unfortunatly it does. and even without this it means a lot to people to figure out who they are and have that reflected in themselves. As i said he should just be himself and not worry about social stigmas and that means to ignore them and be yourself by not having to follow them or go against them.
on another note im really glad you were so polite in your comment. Because a lot of people dont quite get this they dismiss it as stupid or unimportant. Most people though are extremely rude about it so thank you for not being one of those people. I have to say though Makoto asked for help in all this so that means he would like people to reply to help him figure stuff out not people replying to saying its not important or it doesnt matter in the first place because this isnt a discussion of whether or not gender identify is a real thing or important its a thead to help Makoto. But you did a have a positive message and were very polite so thats better than a lot of people ( cough comment number 6 )
Kuronaii~☆

Just gonna throw a short opinnion in here.
You're a Tomboy, aren't you? A woman that behaves in a manly way, but still has womanly dreams. You feel fine with your body, don't you? You don't behave like a woman and prefer a different style, that's just being special. That's nothing negative, but something to be proud of.

Also, did you choose your username from the Idolm@ster anime? Because I think that character fits you.

Theres a big difference between being a tomboy and being queer gender because you don't feel like you identify with your gender. But you may be right I can't read Makoto's mind so I wouldn't know.
Also yeah the user name is cool although I thought of Makoto from free and Makoto from School days ( oh god school days)
Kuronaii~☆

>>12,14,16 thanks for your help and sticking out for me it helps to know people are on your side and understand.

>>15 i am not a tomboy like kuronaii said there a bing difference with being a tomboy and being queer gender, i don't really fell fine about my body other wise why would i try to make my chest always flat and even use dangerous ways to do so? but yes i do like different style cause i never did like the fashion that is going around but thats totally different and stuff

btw about the username, makoto is a unisex japanese name that mean sincerity so it as nothing to do with free and school days^^'

there's no such thing as "queer gender"

>>18 I am simply using queer gender as a term to say I am questioning my gender. Just to not get confuse with the idea of genderqueer. I do know it is not an actual term.

I just want to remind everyone that I created this thread to seek help. So please be careful of what you are saying. I didn't really want to say this but I surfer for real bad depression and anxiety. Some comments on here actually made me cry a lot and get me real anxious that it got me sick. I am very sensitive to does things, I would just appreciate that you please be careful on posting replys. Thank you.

Im really sorry that some of the things people said have made you upset. If you have anymore questions or want to talk im always open. Yea i would avoid any damaging method if your going to bind there are actual binders you can buy and if they are to expensive then you can try my method which is multiple sports bras ( this works suprisingly well) please avoid duck tape or anything like that ive heard stories of people going to the hospital with their skin ripped off because of it. Anyway I hope things get better and me and the rest of the dollars are always here if you to talk again
-Kuronaii~☆

Identifying with your sex could simplify the issue.
(For the record: Chromosomes are what determine your sex - not necessarily genitals!)

At that point, you can dress however you want. Gender seems pretty fluid these days; men can wear dresses, and women can wear tuxedos.

Basically, do whatever the heck you think suits you. "Crossdressing" only applies when the clothing is labeled as "men's" or "women's," and those labels lack consistency.

I went through something similar, though mine was more a question of sexuality than of gender.

I'm merrycheer on Skype, and my email is merrycheer.dollars@gmail.com
Feel free to contact me on either if you want to talk about your situation more directly.

>>21 oh I know there safe ways to bind. Too more then one sport bra can be dangerous too. (Or any bra actually) but I'm waiting on finally getting my binder. It was a donation and my fiend is going to send it to me by mail. He picked it up for me :) they wanna see the ace band gone! XD

>>2 thanks. But there a difference with crossdressing and gender... I get what your trying to say but it not that much a mattr of cloths. It's a matter of gender and identity. Cloths are just cloths. Gender is just something complicated that makes me confused about my self

oh yeah should probably have left my email like Merrycheer did
Kuronaii.dollars@gmail.com

>>24 thanks! I should probably make a dollars email as well... ^^'

Sorry, I misunderstood the flat chest part and thought you were comfortable with your natural chest, instead of trying to keep it flat. By the way, I think that's kinda understandable.After all, aren't breasts pretty inconvenient?
Personally, I'm not too sure about my sexuality, but I won't give it any thought until I need to, meaning until I find a partner. I think it will come to me naturally then.
On a sidenote, you don't need to be sad just because some people misunderstood you, just because they interpreted your words wrong or are simply being mean. After all, despite wanting to help you, we don't know much about your personality. Nonetheless, I apologise if my comments hurt you.

I'm in a simmilar sitiation myself, so i understand how you feel. my advice is this. First, confirm what you want to be. If you want to be a guy, dont be shy about. I have a feeling ur leaning more on being a guy, and from what i read, you'd wanna be "transgender". Transgender is just the transistional phase. If you identify as a male, you dont need "transgender" or "ftm" with it. You simply identify as a boy.

On another note, you said people have expectations on you if identify as either a boy or a girl. Ik how you feel. For a while I identified as a boy (despite being born biologically as a girl). But there is somthing i realised. Even when a few people called be a boy, they started saying things like "A guy doesnt do that" or "A guy doesnt act like that". Basically, even as a guy, i had expectations put on me. What im trying to say is that if you're afraid of expectations based on gender, do what i do. Dont identify as a gender. In other words, dont be a guy, girl, genderfluid, bigender or anything. Just be confortable with what you do, way you act and remember, if other people cant deal with you, oh well. You WILL find people who love you the way you are.

Another issue you might have, is sexuality. Because u identify as a guy now, you're probably confused about ur sexuality as well. Be pansexual. meaning ur okay with anyone as long as you love them. you dont have to love a specific gender.

I'm telling you all this because im in a simmilar situation to you, so i really really hope this helps. ^-^

>>26 yes it is true that people don't know much about my personallity. And yes breast are very unconvient specially went u don't want to look at your own chest. I can't stand the look of it.... It feel so out of place and not what it should look like.

>>27i it isn't a want. It's more trying to figure out who I am and the more time pass the more I look at my self the more I think it's isn't me. I've talk to my friends today and they realized that outside of school if I would wear a dress or something girly I would also wear a wig (I cosplay a lot) like if I wanted to be someone else. Or like a mask.

I do know that boy have expectation because it's how society works. But what I mean by my parents having some for me is more like forcing me to wear a dress or skit on Christmas. Not a dress shirt and tie. Having lon hair. Liking what society think is girly all that shit. Yes I do identify as a boy , that can't look in the mirror anymore and btw I got my sexuality under controle. I don't really have a label cause yeah I just chose to love who I want and yeah. So I'm queer. I like being queer cause yeah idk lol

I'm sorry, but I can't make out what your actual problem is. Personally, you are fine with your gender, but just don't know yet what exactly you identify as? I honestly think the answer to that will come in time.
So your real problem is that your surroundings expect you to fit into the role of a woman?

Once again I apologise for misinterpreting but I'll try to come up with something at least encouraging once I grasp the situation.

>>29 my problem is major confusion about my gender. And I got no clue where to get help and it's not like I can ask my family so that's why I'm here. Just need help figure it all out type of thing

In that case, I think the best way to find out is by developing. Time will show the outcome, and until then maybe just going along with things and enduring what role others force you in while not knowing what you really identify as would be the best option. Personally, during puberty, I often thought about becoming female, while still maintaining a male position. As a child, I had some homosexual experiences (which is kinda fucked up, playing doctor and all that) and I really thought that I'd fit in better as a woman. However by now, I feel perfectly fine with my gender.
Then again, at the time, I didn't view it as a problem...

>>31 I am seeing my psychiatrist next month I am going to talk to him about how I feel about my gender but I don't think he can help me much... And time is something that is long but yet again I got one last year of high school...

Simple answer:
Follow your heart =.=
Case solved.

>>33 it's really not that easy.

>>33 if it was that easy i wouldn't have made this tread

>>32 Give us an update then, maybe show them this thread?
Anyways, it's not like you have to hurry. Even if you have only one year of highschool left, you don't need to make romantic memories or something like that. Highschool exists to make new friends, it should be enjoyed together with your friends and be used to educate you, that's all there is to it.

>>36 I'm not really worried about high school because mine is so small like from grade 7-12 we are like not even 300 student. But I'm worrying about after so college... I'm moving to a place not so open. The school as a lgbtq group but I got problem that I most take gym. So of course gender is a real problem here. For change room, school, bathroom, my mental health and social statues. I will too probably show my psy all of this and I will for sure give updates.

As for updates right now:
I now tell people my male name and use he him his as pronouns.
I it a job because of coop and will probably make sure my suporvisor know and put my male name on my name tag
Job = money so I will be going to be ALL manly cloths and be who I wanna be ( fashion wise. Fashion freak. Runs in the family...)
And.... I've being considering getting a packer.... >\\\\> but like dunno where to get one and I'm too embarrased to get one anyway XD

Packers can be bought online, but they usually double as sex toys. If you don't want to freak your guardian out, just bundle up a pair of socks and stick it down there.

I'm a trans guy who's been self-aware for three years now (I'm trying to keep up with the Dollars as much as I can, but I sometimes forget so idk how active I'll be), so let me know if you have any questions. I'd be more than happy to help.

I get the binder, since breasts can be inconvenient and it helps you to appear male. But the packer, well, first of all, it's inconvenient so there goes that argument. Furthermore, I don't think it does any good in terms of appearance unless you're in your underwwear, and this leads to the changing room issue. I think the seperation in sport classes exists to prevent sexual influences. Biologically, you're a girl, so you have the same features as the other girls and they're less likely to approach you while changing. I think that even if you want to fit in as a boy, you might still want to take the female options in such situations, same goes with bathrooms and so on, since those seperations have more reasons than just gender identification.
Unless, of course, you want to deceive everyone and live as a boy. But that's not it, is it?

If he's a boy, he's not deceiving anybody whatsoever.

He belongs in the boys room, but if he fears that someone will harass him for what his body looks like, then he should go into the girls room.

If it were me, I would go into the boys room, claim I have social anxiety, and just change in a bathroom stall rather than a locker room. Accommodations can be made if you look hard enough.

>> 39 >>40 I can if do live as a boy right now. I do not feel comfortable walking in the girls change room or bathroom because I 1. Don't feel I belong there and 2. People give me looks of what are u doing in there. I never walked in the boys room... Because I'm scared of getting buillied. After next year im going to a new school. So new start. I wanna be see as only boy at my new school. So it would I've it away if I go in the girls room but then again it would give it away if I change in the boys

If you really have the determination to be seen as a boy... Choosing the boys' room sounds sensible. You'll have a lot of explaining to do, I don't think you can hide your sex. After all, the teachers might not be cooperative and try to force you into the girls' class, and your peers will notice your chest while changing, so that's the main issue. The board of education... Do you think you can bring them to adapt to your situation? It'll be very hard since the classes are usually seperated by sex, not gender. Your peers, well, I think explaining your situation might be the best course of action? Hiding your chest might be possible, but especially with sportive activities, you'll face trouble. Also, the boys might start molesting you or expressing their sexuality in some other way. You'll have a huge challange awaiting you, are you sure you don't want to wait until your education is finished? I know it's uncomfortable, but for things to resolve the way you want, you'll have to face an insurmountable challenge.

>>42 I want to be seen as a boy and everything but does are exactly things I'm scared about what you just said. Too I can of wanna startdating again and if I hide that part of me and just be a girl I find that it greates a LOT of problems too. Finding a boyfriend isn't way at all. Girlfriends are easier to find XD. But I had bad experience with that...

Actually, I think a girl or boyfriend will understand you better than any of us. You don't have to worry about that too much, though getting there will be difficult.

Hey i'm a transguy (｡・ω・)ﾉﾞ

>> 44 actually I just started to go out again... And lucky me it's a trans guy so he gets me and get me y I'm so insecure and shy

>>45 hello there! (・ω・)ノ

>>46 That's great to hear :D
I hope he'll be able to help you carry your burden and assist you in fighting your insecurities. A single person understanding you can already save you during rough times!

>>47 he agreed to go shopping for manly stuff with me and he only use my male name and pronouns. Too he worry about me a lot <\\\<

>>48 that sounds wonderful!

I'm very confused with my gender. I was born female but as I saw others say, it doesn't feel right some of the time. Sometimes I enjoy being a girl but I also feel as though.. I'm not supposed to be..? I think I might be genderfluid but I also have an agender friend that is very harsh when it comes to gender. I feel as though if I came out to them, or even told them this, they would put me down or tell me I was just confused. This sounds odd but despite them being agender they very much want me to identify as a female because they think I "make a pretty girl" and they want to stay the only agender or nonbinary friend in their group.

>>49 i think she should go with what ever make you comfortable.

I like being a boy and I do love fashion like pastel goth that is (a girl fashion) well bs I will make it a boy fashion too. Just express your self how you what.

>>49 Your friend sounds really, really weird. Being trans isn't an exclusive club, I promise! I've heard people like your friend get called "gatekeepers."

Your friend is a rude one. There are some rude ones in the community, but the nice side of the trans community welcomes anyone who's questioning.

You be you!

>>50 >>51
thank you guys :3 you really made me feel better

glad to help!

>>52 Happy I could help :3


Ok too side note... Un school start in like a month. I'm like scared as hell there no way in hell I'm being a girl this year. But I'm not in an lgbtq friendly school. I got 2 people on my side for sure but that's it at the moment....

I'm a little late to this and can't read all the posts as I'm pressed for time but OP based on your description of being meh with your bodyvit seems like you're a non-dysphoric non-op transboy

>>54 Tried talking to the pricipal yet? Or the... trust teacher? You know the one responsible for the pupils problems, I don't know the english term, but in Austria, there is one in every school I've heard of. They'll be able to at least tell you what your capabilities are.

>>55 the beauty of being a cosplayer. One of my fav character to cosplay is a girl. Soooo I can't really give that up right now. Lol And too I want biological children. ^^' but I can't really look at my body in a mirror. Soo idk

>>56 I will talk to a teacher went school start. Because there not much to do if I'm not at school.

Hey Makato! I know plenty about gender confusion and issues. If you want, I can try to help. Message me on ourandevils@gmail.com and I might be able to help...

Oh and by the way, if anyone sees my gmail address and tries to call me a satanist, I'm just going to ignore them. My gmail address is simply a tribute to Hikaru and Kaoru from OHSHC

>>58 oh ok thanks!! And that's an amazing email adress and tribut you got there :3

here with an other update..... i'm come to realized i am transgender and now i got no idea where to go about that, like do i tell my psychiatrist about that? should i try talking to my parents about it?not sure what to do

First off; are you sure it's transgender? The other two main variants are bigender and genderfluid

I believe telling your parents will be the best. You'll make some examinations and if it's the case, it will be confirmed. Best of luck, my friend.

Unless your parents may not be understanding or if they're against that kind of thing. Or if you're really not comfortable

>>61 >>62 I feel more comfortable being a boy having a flat chest and stuff. I do not go with all the major stereotype of being a boy do. Because like I do still love and wear makeup but I don't feel like that should matter. And I feel like went I present my self female I do feel like I'm trying to hard to fit into what people wanna see. My parent aren't very open about gender and I think it something not helping me. But I am more happy being a boy. Even people from my youth group think my mood as change and that I look and feel more confident and happier now.

Also went I look back for a few years now (like 2-3 at less) my parent have being letting me more loss on what I wear and it always as being more masculine things. I got insulted and told that I look like a boy in front of my family by my mom and then she telling me to change into something girly went I didn't want to and it was the first time I had "boy cloths" on and it made me really confident and happy.

All of this to say. Pretty sure that awnser the question.... I'm a trans guy in a family that made me deny and hate my self for years. Aka brain washed by my family.

Yeah, shit happens. But you can do it, I'm sure. Being a boy or a girl, just be happy and it's enough. Best of luck!

After reading the entire thread, I found that you are transgender. That is great to hear. I went through a phase of sexuality, not gender. For years I didn't know what to believe, if I like the same sex or not. I never mentioned it to anyone until some time two years ago. Even if you are questioning your sexuality or gender, it's always good to talk to someone that is able to help. If I never talked to a good friend of mine, I might have never survived high school by myself. I know sexuality and gender is different, always talk to someone who is open to the idea that you may be different in a way some people might not understand fully. I came to terms of who I really am. It takes people different amounts of time to came to realize who they really are. If you are a girl by birth, but am more like a boy, so be it. If that is truly who you are, people should be fine that. It may be confusing now, but I know that you will some day figure it out and be proud of who you really are. At the same time, you should also be careful of other people and how they view you situation. I have met people who think that the world is cut and dry (old saying if you ever heard it), but at the same time, the world is changing for the better, and more people are getting more and more comfortable with people who are different (in a way). With all this said, I hope the best for you and who you become. I know you be someone great in this world.

lemme see that crakc girl, i bet it aint whack girl

Congrats on your identity! Tell your psych if you trust them. The most important thing is your safety, so make sure that you don't come out to someone who might hurt you, alright?

JUST BE YOURSELF WHO CARES ABOUT LABELS

>>69 It expedites explanations.

"So, are you dating a boy?"
"No, although I have the physical appearance of a woman, I have the internal mental identification of a man. I am attracted to women the same way you are."

vs.

"No, I'm transgendered."

I see your point, it can get out of hand, but as an idea it's not flawed.

>>65, 66, 68 thank you guys, i resently came out to one of my friend that always had my back he doesn't know much about trans, but he did ask me to explain it to him also he'll have my back for school (soo scared about that)

i do trust my psy, i have 3 other friends seeing him also so i know his chill XD

Well my mom forced me to come out tonight... She was saying how I need to love my body and u how u don't change it. She was tellin me that how went he was my age she looked like a boy because of the cloths she use to wear and stuff. I keep telling her to stop it but she wouldn't and she didn't get why an just keep talking.... So I can of told her I'm trans I'm a boy. And over all had an argument because she was like ok I understand but bla bla I'm open about it. Not at all because you don't understand my pair and that u need to hut the fuck up because your making everything worst and *sigh* ...

It hurts like I bitch... Just got force to come out and I wasn't ready.... So good bye therapy, good bye thestosterone, good bye name change and all that shit. Because obviously she doesn't see that this is what it is and that I'm not her daughter and she keeps telling me u don't need to change just be who u want to be. Obviously she doesn't see the social aspect of all of this and I don't know what to do... I've pretty much being crying all night long.

Hey, hey. It's okay. You have a community of people here who will help you out, who've been in the same boat as you, and who will always be willing to talk.

I'm really sorry to hear that, though. I can understand why she would want to know, but acting the way she did and not supporting her kid is not alright.

Get her to read an article about this -- maybe it'll help her understand. Maybe it won't. But you have friends to lean on, right? Talk to them about this.

I promise, it'll be alright. We're living in an age where it's better than ever to be part of the LGBT community, and though there'll always be sourpusses, there will always be people ready to support and help.

Even if it's your mother that you're having trouble with.

I hope I don't sound rude by saying this, but thinking you're going to get surgery and hormones and your legal gender and name changed is a thinking pattern that'll only disappoint you. You'll get it when you're an adult with a stable job to pay for it. You'll get there, I promise.

If you need to lie to her to get what you socially and emotionally need then I say it's fine. If you need to wail on about how the mental/emotional aspect of being trans is so much harder than just wanting a different body, then do it.

Also, you should explain dysphoria to her if you can. I'm not good at explaining it, but it's basically when something regarding your gender feels wrong. For example, the dissonance when you know you're a boy, but your mom refuses to call you "he." Like that.

You know your mom better than any of us, so try to appeal to her emotions. Play it by ear. From experience, I can tell you that it's a ton of trial and error that resulted in a fair amount of kissing ass.

>>73 74 went I tried explain it to my mom she wouldn't listen. I tried shower her video but she told me that I think she's stupid and she doesn't understand and that aller entry she gets everything. She told me that she understand dysphoria. And her lame exemple was would I be happier if I wanted to lose 20 pounds then I did?! I told her yeah because if that would make u happy in your body then yes. She started to tell me again on how u don't do that and stuff.

Also then she gives me exemple of mtf people that just came out at her work. Ok yeah so? I mean I don't get her. I'm not that women. I'm her son it's different and she just won't listen to me... Like not people actually....

>>75

That really sucks.

When a parent is being bad like that, I try to get away from them. If explaining really is getting you nowhere, it's important to surround yourself with good people. I think you said you had a boyfriend, but I could be mistaken.

Busy yourself with something, like schoolwork (you know you need to in August, anyways), a video game, a really good book, or a hobby or something.

Please don't let her get you down! I wish you the best!

I argue with my all family all day about being bisexual or pansexual. They say its a sin. I dont care it. They say you will not be happy around judmental srtaight people around me. I dont care that too. They say dont show your girlfriend or boyfriend to us and let us live happily. (İma girl btw). I dont care anything and sau "uh huh whatever you say" and fuck off. I dont even care if my family will reject me or stuff. I wanna be what i want to be. I care no one.

Well if you still feel like a girl sometimes (I don't know if you said that or I just misread) then you might be genderfluid or bigender. Just saying

>>78 I don't feel like a girl. The only time I can ish say I feel like a girl sis went I'm cosplaying a girl character. But yes people would say because I hate body hair and I love makeup it girls things. =_= witch is not true. But anyway I feel like I'm a boy and I'm happier being a boy. I think u just missed read XD

Be yourself no matter what

told my step dad i'm trans he takes it better then my mom, i'm single again....

other note, i saw my psy, he thinks its a better idea that i see someone at the gender clinic for even my anxiety, since i've being doing ok i'm off my meds for now :D but anyway his making a referral to the closest gender clinic... its like an hour and a half away from where i live. i just hope i can finally get some professional help and stupid papers to hopefully start T.

ps yes i know... this was just an update to anyone reading this

>>81 Yes, that was probably no one.

PS I only read the last post

if u're not sure, u're a bisex

congrats! >>81 T will take a VERY long time to get, so I hope you can just focus on getting your life in order, especially with school here now and all :) It'll get hectic quickly.

Personally, I don't buy into the gender spectrum idea. For me it's either one or the other and it's permanent.

Listen Makoto, on post >>79 you said that you don't feel like a girl and that you feel happier as a boy. That's impossible because of the following reason: you don't know what it's like to be a boy. You were born a girl, raised as a girl, treated as a girl, have the girl amount of hormones going through you, that's a fact. You only know what it's like to be a girl. What I'm saying sounds harsh and you might feel like I'm attacking you, but I'm not. Truly I'm just saying that because of the circumstances you have been in, you only know what it's like to be a girl and only that. Maybe the idea of masculinity comforts you and that's totally normal and maybe that just means that you're a girl who is more in touch with her masculine side.

Anyways, that's just me. I think that if you agree with me you'll feel the urge to continue because you could feel like because you've told your family you're too deep in this "transgender" thing to go back on or else your family will bug you about it forever.

If you're interested, this video explains what I've tried to say a little better. (Just FYI, I'm not a Christian and I don't agree with Christian values like the gentleman in the video. I just think that his opinion is logical and well thought out.)

>>86
you and the man in the video have good intentions but your completely missing the social aspect and the mental aspect to gender and identity. Yes if everyone was treated exactly the same whether they were male or female then gender would be irrelevant but its not because this isnt a perfect world and you arent. again theres a whole point that your missing.
To Makoto and anyone else in this thread or the dollars who is experiencing gender issues whether it be transitioning or finding yourself with binaries or nonbinaries feel free to email me Kuronaii.dollars@gmail.com or find me on the Drrr chat because as i was more active in the beginning of this thread I've experienced a lot of this myself and can provide a safe non judgemental outlet to talk to.

>>83 ummm idk if u read all of the post but I'm a boy. Not unsure anymore. Pretty much a boy. Thank you very much. And hey last I check boy can like makeup and fashion too ;D

>>84 thanks. And true I'm not focusing on school much more and where I want to go with that.

>>86 maybe you Should look into learning something too. Because yes I'm biologically a girl my brain is telling me other wise. I got major social anxiety and voice dysphoria. I was my voice was deeper. I wish if have a flat chest. A more masculine face. Most I go on? Yes most trans* people have being raised as there assigne gender at birth. I got a family that's very close to that. But doesn't change the fact that I am who I am. I get your trying to help but it's doing the complete opposite. And to be honest I've being also raise that hey I went for boy stuff. I asked for Christmas went I was little construction tools. I would help my dad build stuff. If play video game and play with cars and Lego. I use to play with the toys my dad use to play with went he was 10. Doesn't sound Girly to me.

I'm just going to be who I am and live my life how I want. If like people to please stop saying oh maybe your this or that. Went I clearly said I'm a boy. Thanks you very much

>>89 so you're definitely a trans boy?

Welcome to the club :D *high-fives*

>>90 thanks :3 but tbh idk if I want any surgery or t yet. Surgery cause it's scary as hell and just the stitching and healing after... Seeing that makes me sick to my stomach and t well I still want biological kids that are healthy and all. So... Not sure.... It's going to be a long process. =_= but hey I'm lucky I live in a place where u can change your sex and name legally without medical paper or what ever! :D

Hi, I don't know if I'm to late to reply to this thread or what ever and you know what this isn't even a proper reply. In fact this isn't quite related to the original poster and is kinda selfish. Pay no attention to me if you wish..I was wondering what age you sort of start to show others you're trans*. I get that some know from 6 and so do their parents, but no one ever seemed to notice with me. I was also wondering if feelings of dysphoria are normal to only hit when puberty hits. Or if it's just a "phase". Thanks for taking the time to read this and sorry for any inconvenience.

>>92
Hey so I'm not sure if im misinterperating what u mean by Show others your trans, but ive got two different versions. First by what age do you come out at? Well there is no set age a lot of people dont come out until their in their 20's or 30's or ever sadly. Some come out when their younger its up to you to decide based on how your feel how comfortable you are and what your situation is. If you meant what age will other people start to notice your feelings? Well heres the thing. If you dont tell people they wont know. Nobody can read your mind unfortunatly and while if youve identified as a boy all your life and then start wearing dresses people might have a guess you still really cant tell what someone else feels inside unless they tell you. Finally What age do you start to feel gender dysphoria. Well again this varries per person. You start to develop and recognize gender at a ver young age so some kids know right away who they are, but on the other hand it takes others to experience this recognize it and then accept it. Sorry if i didnt quite answer your questions

Your male i personal Would just stay as is or well fu%k i dont know go back to being straight its a choice your just crazy in the membrane to were science Can't help from some unknown chemical in your brain we Can't help yet. I've seen to much shit in the world you people all people in general choose to be fu%ked up grow evolve like i did be someone great dont settle for less

You can be whatever you want to be or what you know yourself to be. I know myself to be genderfluid, but I identify as female a lot of the time since it comes at a greater convenience to me. I basically go hard male at home sometimes, but it depends on how you feel. Just follow who you believe yourself to be and you'll find it.

This is a good thread about personal identifications. So what if I was born a male dad! I can identify as a Strong Independent Black Women if I wanna!

it´s not okay to feel trapped behind feelings that will crush you if you don´t do anything about it! what you feel is not uncommon, in fact. there are many people who feel like you do ^_^ if you want to change gender then do it. if you see yourself as a woman. then why not become one? it´s just as simple as that. and the gay part. you can´t prevent yourself for falling in love with someone. it just doesn't work that way. it´s useless to fight against this. you are who you are. it is no point of denying that. but just so you know. i admire people who dare to face haters and be able to turn the other cheek. not everyone can do that. i admire those people. they are so brave. i believe you are brave enough to do that as well ^_^