I was raised by an alcoholic, I have seen my dad beat my mom, and hid in the corner of the room crying with my hands over my ears trying not to hear the yelling, and the crying. not a fun childhood to say the least. now imagine the one person who's opinion you actually give a damn about, calling you a word that in your eyes comes with a heavy meaning like that. Yes i like to have a small double-shot or two of whiskey every night before i go to bed, but i dont think that makes me an alcoholic. I have not once been rowdy, never once raised my hand to the person i love, or found myself actually needing to drink because my body craved it. Never once sold anything i own for money to buy alcohol. I think that i am pretty far from what an alcoholic is, and im glad. to me, calling someone an alcoholic is basically the same as saying that they are dirt, that they are sick, or abnormal. (just from my personal experiences)
now that there is some context, well my issue is small, and honestly should not really be an issue, but like i said, i like to have a drink from time to time. basically I learned a while back that someone that i really care about thinks im an alcoholic, and has come out and said it, talked about it with a mutual friend of ours, and then that mutual friend went and called me one as well. I may have over reacted, but i got really offended, and ranted for a sec before cutting myself off from the two for a small amount of time to cool off. I am a little stubborn, so just coming back and apologizing does not seem all too appealing, and somewhere in my head i dont believe i should. I was insulted and disrespected by someone i love, and another person i trust, but i do feel sad...i think, or something..well its an ache in my chest and it feels heavy, annoys the hell out of me.

any ideas, opinions, anything would be appreciated, i know ill go back and apologize anyhow but just wanted to hear from an outsider

I think you should apologize just for the way you originally reacted. From they're perspective they probably believe that you are an alcoholic and are wanting to give an intervention because they care. However you should tell them that you're not a alcoholic and your reasoning and feelings about why. That way they can understand your perspective and why you reacted the way you did.
Also there's nothing wrong with having a nice drink no an again. As long you're not dying of liver failure or completely ruining you life than by all means enjoy yourself.

An alcoholic is someone addicted to alcohol, not necessarily violent and not necessarily selling things to get some.

As PuellaMagi said, the person is most likely concerned for you. They probably don't feel like the word alcoholic has a very strong meaning either, unless they grew up in the exact same way you did, with the exact same emotions about everything, the exact same limit for negative things, etc.

That "small double-shot or two of whiskey every night" of yours does indeed sound like you may have a problem, so it doesn't surprise me this person is getting concerned. Not to mention you say you drink "from time to time". Most people wouldn't consider "time to time" being the same thing as "every day".

That being said, if you lashed out at them like that, unless they were being mean about it, an apology may be in order. And while I can't really know for sure whether the person is actually concerned or just thinks you're addicted with no further concerns (which I would doubt, since you sound like you're quite close), maybe you should lay off those shots for a while and show you're not addicted, but consciously choose to drink it.

First off: apologize to them, even if you're still angry at them. You should also explain the connotation you've alway associated with the word "alcoholic" so that they understand why you reacted like you did.

Just to clarify: alcoholic means a person who relies on alcohol or has a constant or routine need / craving for it. It doesn't mean you get drunk all of the time.

Try not drinking any alcohol (meaning absolutely none) for 1 week. If you can't do that without extreme discomfort or if you can't do it at all, you may actually have a drinking problem (keep in mind the definition above!).
If that is indeed the case, you can:
- ask your friends for help
- gradually drink less and less until it's no problem to go one week without alcohol
~ don't start drinking regularly again after this.

That's just what I could come up with. You might not have any problem at all.

I wish you luck!

I wouldn't apologize. They can show concern without wording it so strongly. Being an alcoholic is one thing, casual drinking is another. I would explain why you were so mad, but never apologize for how you feel.

I just have to point out quickly that humans wake up and brush their teeth every morning, does this make us OCD? We make our beds, we brush our hair, we do certain things every day that do not make us weird or obsessive. Just because someone LIKES alcohol and has a LITTLE every day doesn't make them an alcoholic. :/

>>6 I understand your point (I think), however those things aren't quite so relatable to this case as we turn them into habits to maintain hygiene. Never drinking alcohol probably won't hurt your health.
I'd also like to apologize for my post >>4. I think I got the definition of alcoholism wrong. I found a definition that described it as "a chronic disease including uncontrolled drinking and preoccupation with alcohol". From this definition, it's almost certain that you are not an alcoholic. I still support the idea of the one-week w/o alcohol test, but that wouldn't necessarily imply alcoholism.

I didn't mean those things quite as literally as I wrote. I guess my point was just that we all have something that we do every day that we like but do not obsess over.