I am nothing. I have no dreams or motivations, no plans for the future. If I were to suddenly end up in a completely different place never to return or be connected to this life again then I would be more happy than sad. I have no life. I have no one around me that I care about. I don't hate or even dislike the people that I know, but our relationship is nothing significant.
My story hasn't begun. I haven't met that person that I will have a meaningful connection with. I have no purpose.

Nothing happens in my life. It's just a whole lot of nothing. I just want a friend. I want a story. I'm lonely and purposeless. But I don't understand what I'm meant to do or where I'm meant to go. What do I do? I'm 19 and I don't care where I go, as long as I find something. But is there anything out there for someone like me?

And no, I'm not interested in being cheered up, or after hope or anything like that. I just want...something? I don't know what kind of responses I'll get but I guess I was just needing to get something out there. At least this way I exist to the outside world. I don't meet anyone new here. I might as well not exist. I'm not suicidal but I really don't get why I'm here though. I figured something would happen by now. I figured I'd have at least something by now. But I have nothing. I just want to begin my story.

I can see what you're pointing at. Life is boring when you're just taking it day by day. Not having any real purpose. Just going forward without reason. Or in this case just waiting for something to happen. The thing is things doesn't just happen by themselves, a story doesn't start by itself. This world itself is just plain old boring. the ones making this world interesting is us, the people living in it. If you want an adventure if you want a purpose what you need to do is to decide what you really want and seek it. As you seek the goal shall be your purpose the road your adventure and the things you meet on the way your meaning.
I know it's not the simplest thing to do but it's an option.

You said you wanted something. I do not have much to offer really but I can give you my friendship, tell me if you want it.

Oh well good luck and see yah

>>1 That's pretty annoying when everything around you don't move. When you're bored to death by your boring life and just wait for something interesting to happen. Oh I know how it feels and I also know how it feels to get out of this boredom. I can give you an advice how to get out of it and a warning. If you really want to have an exciting life, you have to act by yourself to get to this happening and not just wait, just like BY5T4ND3R said (>>2) But you can't go over the edge. You absolutely can't go over the edge, because if you'll get hurt in 99% you'll regret this. I know what I'm "talking" about, since I went over the edge and can't go back.
Oh and btw. If it wasn't what you looked for, I'll be happy if you'll just accept my friendship. :)

A friend...that word... I just...can't use that word. I don't know if I'll ever be able to truly call someone that. I guess you'd say I'm lonely in a crowd. I have "friends" but...I want something more. I pretty much see having a friend in the same way as true love, it has to have that much significance.

Impressions sure are a pain. Are a few posts on a thread like this really enough to get the right impression of people? I swear, I'll never understand how something like friendship is truly meant to work.

A friend comes with the story. You grow up with them and see each other so much that you truly get to know and understand them. Or you meet them as you go along your story. But I'm past that, I didn't have anyone like that to me, and the flow of my story has gone stagnant.

But without any purpose or motivations then you can't just say that I have to act. It's not simply waiting... I have nothing to go on. I'm not after excitement, I'm after a story.

I'm not simply after a friend. I'm still only nothing and am simply unable to have a friend while I'm like this. Without a story or purpose I can't truly have a friend.

I don't know... There's something missing, an emptiness I don't understand how to fill. I don't understand many things... I... don't know what else I was going to say... All I can do is wonder what kind of impression I've given...

why don t you join some club.there is liteture clubs and etc.friends can appear in the most unknow corners

Yo. Nobody. You want substance, right? Not so much a purpose, just something that makes you feel full? What kind of dreams and ambitions have you had in your lifetime? Even something you'd find stupid from back when you were a little kid.

Anything works when you don't have a lead, at least that's what I would figure. Obviously no one here can give you a hint as to what you're gonna do, where you're gonna go, if anything at all, right? So what do you like? Has there been anything in your life thus far that's made you want to get out of bed in the morning, clean yourself up, and thrust yourself into the world because you know you'll experience that thing?

Or is it that you've been dead set on the ideas you hold about life as a story that you've been, not so much waiting, but have been expecting something to happen that maybe you've missed an opportunity in the past that you had never even noticed?

While these might seem like stupid questions, details can be useful. No ones life is truly bleak in its entirety. There has to be something. Music, media, art, writing, a task, a talent, a skill, physical movement, mental polishing, studies, anything. Is there a chance that there's been something, or no?

Dear nobody I was am and always will be kind of hollow I lost my parents when I was young to cancer and illness my cousins and grandparents too it was the shock of being all alone that made me withdraw from people and the people who took care of me abused me and stole from me I was never a part of THERE family you know and so it just got worse I never got better life never fixed itself and when I reached out no one was there and after hanging myself over doseing on pills freezing to death and constantly cutting myself there was still no one to help me I think I'll be broken and hollow forever too I do remember tho when I tried no one was there even councellors doctors child services no one gave a Fuck so I gave up it just made me worse too all the abuse and neglect so I gave up more till the point I forget what living is what friend really feels like now people are just people I'm trapped in my hell for the rest of my life but you don't need to be if you know deep down what you need get it if no one will help make them don't give in don't wait forever cause there is nothing worse than being hollow there is no meaning now just air and silence but that's my own experience I know it's not yours but I do know something must have changed you some trauma or something if I'm wrong disregard this if I'm right don't just wait thinking tomorrow tomorrow after some time it will be out of reach and after that it just wont matter all I know for sure is I wasn't born this way I remember when I changed and why and I waited too long I'm just a person now nothing less nothing more ever again

Quote from the emerald Herald dark souls 2 I heard it and thought maybe that's why I'm empity now ? Cause I tried to kill myself before a few times and did die once but maybe it's just flashy talk

" for when the undead dies it is never truly dead just one step closer to hollowing . Not all undead are hollows but all hollows were once undead ".

Do you believe in fated meeting?

I was too like you, hollow.
I have no friend, nor a story of my life.
It's just a normal boring life.
All my parents care is my score.
I don't even know why i was born on this world.
I already attempted multiple suicide, which is always failed.

One day i found him, he is a new student in my school. He accept me, and lead me to a story that i never had.

From there on i drastically changed. I am now more expressionist, and smile a lot. I have so many friends now thanks to him. I also found my exact reason to live here in this universe.

You said that there is something missing, that you don't know how to fill.
That's why you should let others fill your heart.

I don't know will this help you or not but,
I hope my story help you.

You can't have something if you can't change your attitude -_-
It's in you.
The decision is in you.
You are the one controlling your own life.
You still something, you have your brain and your own self.
Now that's how you'll survive being anti-social.
Yeah, I guess patience is the answer. But I just figured out something after reading this.
Waiting for nothing is nothing. -_-
Don't wait for nothing. It won't do you something.
My point is. Decide for your own. Do you go to school? Then make friends there. You have neighbours with your own age? Then make them your friend. If you really don't have all of those. Then we are here, we can be friends. That's what the dollars are for, right?
Actually I'm also bored now in my home alone. Waiting for the cops to capture the one who stabbed me. Look at me, my situation is harder than yours. So be more positive. Be more thankful that you still have your chance to make friends outside.

>>6 What...I like... I guess the only answer would be stories. It's why I watch anime and ended up finding this place. I love stories. So that means I should become a writer right? If only it was that simple. I have no motivation to write. I did try, and I guess even now I attempt to write new things...but I can't. It's just not right. I don't read books so it just seems wrong to write them. What kind of writer could I be? Like a manga writer? Or maybe just write books anyway? I don't know. It just never feels right.

But all of my stories are incomplete and unsatisfying. I'd sometimes get really excited thinking that I was on to something amazing but it would never turn out how I expected it to. It's not the writing part, it's the story. It always is so incomplete. It's like I'm only ever seeing parts of it. I can't create something complete. My stories are like me, they always have things missing. I guess you could say that I'm waiting for that too. I often dreamed that I would just meet someone with the other half of my stories. That everything would become complete and we would fill the gaps in each others lives. That both stories would finally begin...

But I didn't miss anything in the past. It's not just that I want something, I want something real. Kind of like what I said about friends.

>>7 No one knows what the future holds. We don't know how long we'll live, who we'll meet or what we'll do. It could stay the same or it could change significantly. The simple truth is that we don't know.
And no I've had no kind of trauma or anything like that. I've lived a "comfortable" life...with no story or anything new.

>>9 That truly is what I was hoping for. It is definitely true that I need to meet someone to fill the void. But like I said, they come with the story, and mine hasn't started yet.

I do too, can never say that somebody is my friend. I'm always being very careful with that word, since I trust almost nobody. I usually fake myself in front of my classmate and other people, while deep down inside I still feel lonely and unwanted, plus a nuisance to be around. My so-called friends always there when they need something, and sometimes their request are just too much. Well, there are some people who claim that I'm one of his/her friend, but I rarely feel the same, because I keep getting a feel that they just stick up with me because they're just giving me a sympathy, which I never like. I feel bad for them, but I really don't wanna claim them as my friend, because they won't be forever at my side, and I know it well.
I rarely trust somebody completely...
Do you feel the same, Nobody? >>11

>>12 It is true, when around others I put on a mask. In real life I'm never truly me. But what can I really be at this point, I'm still only nothing. The me I pretend to be has "friends". I can put on the act and be "normal" around others but it's never real. I never really thought about trust as the issue. Two of things you need in a "true friend" are complete openness and loyalty to each other. And I guess that only comes with a unique kind of understanding of each other. That's how I've always seen it though. They're things you can't find with anyone. It only comes with a special connection or story. It's not until I find something like this that I'll truly be able to say I have a friend.
So to answer your question, I probably do, I guess? Who knows how much our perceptions differ though.

You seem fairly hung up on these preconceptions about stories and friends. Why is that, do you think? Most people don't really aim for what is considered "idealistic".

Dear @Nobody. I didn't mean to make it sound like that. When I offer my friendship to people it's a proposition for building it. I'm just willing to help you :)
Anyway, you claimed to love stories. I would recommend you trying to really become a writer. Because good writers love stories they're writing and more: they love listening to stories of other people. And also they often tell those stories in their books. But I got carried away... I meant, if stories are what you love and if it's the thing you enjoy the most you could cling for this thing, never letting go, because this type of hobby/love would never cause you pain if you'll stay convinced this is what you love and want to do.
I'm sorry if it sounds like nonsense, but it's pretty late in my country... Guess I have to finally go to sleep ><
But I really hope, you'll find a resolution.

Hmmm so your comfortable at least .... Maybe you need a hobby and thru that you will make new friends join karate ... Go fishing .... Then travel down a river and make a place you can go contemplate things and meditate on the greater meaning of things then .... Just accept whatever answers you find .there's how you can start an adventure maybe not a life story but a few adventures are always nice you know ...

Aha your story started when you were born ! I am a genius ahahaha hear my wisdom .... Mew

Watch Anime. The biggest solution of a nothing life. -_-
If you really wanna change your life and start with something. Decide it with yourself. Hang out sometimes outside and meet friends. The "Something" you're saying won't come naturally to you, you must be the one who'll approach them.-_-
Don't worry if you haven't saw that "something" that your dreaming for. Who knows? Maybe tomorrow you'll discover something that you'll like and you're good to. But why wait? if you can do it yourself.
So. discover something you'll like. Try anything that gives you interest.
Sorry if my answer isn't worthy -_-

>>14 If you start with nothing, but have a set path, you can still have a purpose. Like I said, I have no purpose. I have no drive, no clue where to go. But if I were in a scenario where there were less decisions or factors to deal with then my story would still flow. I wouldn't have to choose a path when there's an infinite amount of options. I wouldn't have to search for people with no idea how to find what I'm after. If I had a story, then my life would continue. But the flow has stopped and I'm just sitting here stagnant. I don't know what to aim for. With no purpose, how can I?

>>15 I'm not after help. I don't know what I'm after but I don't think that that kind of help is it. I apologise how I came across, I'm unaware of the impression that I make. But it's not as simple as you said. I can't simply become a writer. I wasn't saying it like I've found my purpose, I was saying that it's the closest I've got. It still feels miles away from what I'm looking for. It doesn't even feel right. Life isn't as simple as you say.

>>16 Comfortable in the sense that I live in first world country and have a place to stay at. My scenario is stable so I can technically survive. But it's not a hobby that I'm after, I need a job and a future. Hobbies are easy for me, I can simply watch anime or read manga. It's a job that I need though. I need something more for my future than this stagnant, redundant life that I'm currently stuck in.

>>17 That wasn't me. I wasn't born like I am now. All that has happened until now was just development, so I can determine who I am and what I'm like. My story hasn't started yet. Nothing significant has happened to me and there's nothing that has meaning in life for me yet. A story can't start until there's something significant. Simply existing isn't a story.

I don't know what else to say really. Am I hoping to join someone else's story? Am I expecting some kind of convenient response about a scenario that I can get involved with? Am I after someone to see how much I'm nothing and use me? Am I expecting someone to relate to me and work this out together or something? Am I just venting? Do I even expect anything out of this? I think I'm just getting this out there in case something happens.

Quite frankly I feel like you're just drifting until some random situation sucks you in like a sort of slime monster. If anything were to go about in a simple fashion I'm sure that would happen, though the only way it could is if you actually posed some sort of interest for the world at large. From how you spin it, you don't, and you lack the motivation and interest to get yourself to the point that is necessary to actually garner interest and get into a "story".

You're the main character of your own story. Right now, your life is a story. Just because something is stagnant doesn't mean it's not being spun. "Simply existing" is a story, whether you believe it to be or not. A story doesn't have to be interesting or encompassing to be a story. The only implications that a story has, is that it is telling the reader or viewer /something/. I assume that even if the opportunity kicked you upside the head with a pair of steel toes that you wouldn't notice.

Now I'm gonna ask, just for the sake of courtesy, do you want an honest opinion or a nice opinion?

you just afraid to start your story

>>20 Don't worry, I'm not going to take offence or anything. I could care less about people "being nice" to me. If I really wanted to live in some "happy" delusion then I wouldn't have this problem. Speak your mind, hold nothing back. I feel like I can guess what you're going to say though...
But one question though: Is having an interest in something, or liking something, really a choice?

>>21 Elaborate. What would I be afraid of?

>>22 somehow I know exactly what you're going through because I've been there myself. Even now I'm not sure if my life ever "got started" and don't think I've found my purpose, but I've sort of just stopped thinking about it as much as I used to. I just do things as they come at me and try to enjoy the company of the people who waft in and out of my life. I find that if you worry too much about the future you tend to miss what's happening in the present. Just as a reference I'm 22 now and nearly graduating university.

Things will get better. You just need to tell someone outside of the internet exactly this. Maybe you'll find someone who will/can help you get your story started. Stay open minded and just try and do things that you wouldn't normally expect yourself to do.

do you want to make your life more interesting

>>25 Are you saying you think I'm scared of having an interesting life?

I don't really understand what you want. You keep talking about stories, and that you want one, but don't you realise? The way you see the world is your setting, and you are the main character of the story you don't think you have. In a way, we all are the main characters of our own stories, in our own worlds.
You also say you want someone, a friend? A lover? A soulmate? Sometimes you need to seek before you'll find what you're looking for. Things don't happen on their own, it's the people around us that make things happen. Everything has a reason. Why don't you make something happen?
Lastly, your so called purpose of life. Why do you want a purpose of life? Isn't it enough that you are living? And if not, why don't you decide for yourself? What do you want in life? It's yours, after all. Decide what you want.

I hope you find what you are looking for. Once you start looking, that is.

i think you are boring or something

There is no such thing as going forward without a reason. Every day you get to learn something or do something, no matter how routine-like or pointless it looks to you. The way you go through your everyday life is already a forward with reason. You said that you haven't met the person with whom you will have that meaningful connection. The truth is, you are already doing that with this post.
And don't call yourself Nobody. You shared your feelings and people here already care. True that people come and go, and we are all busy with things that might look insignificant in your eyes,and some few might look interested for you now and completely ignore you today, but people come with different personalities so don't judge them on that.
I'm 25 years old. I have building up my story and life until some recent time when everything crashed. It was hell. I had everything and now i have nothing.My feelings are close to yours, no purpose, no friend i can call best friend. If it wasn't for that part of hell in my life i would've not realized and see how some people are cruel, nor how some people really need a hand from someone. You might find your life pointless and meaningful now, but there are so many people around that needs you. No need of setting a goal or having wishes, just look with your eyes from a different perspective.

>>27 I don't think you realise how hard it is to make something from nothing. It seems normal to say that nothing will happen unless you make something happen but it doesn't work like that. There are balances for everything and that includes options and possibilities. There's no point in being free if you have no purpose or reason to do anything. You have options but how do you know what to choose? It's just not that simple.

But as far as people go, there are way too many people in the world for that, and it's impossible to truly understand someone by the impressions that they give you. None of us know how we come across so even if I were to examine everyone I still wouldn't know that they're the one from a simple impression. It's not that I've given up or have no hope or anything but rather I need to be realistic. No one knows what the future holds so I'm not going to jump to any conclusions.

>>29 My reason for "moving forward" is in hope of finding a purpose. But that's not a purpose, that's a hope. Like I said I'm stagnant. But as far as meaningful connections go I feel like you didn't understand what I meant. I meant connecting with someone on a completely different level to everyone else. To find someone that I understand and who understands me. To find someone who I feel is significant to me. I'm sorry but I haven't found it yet, sure I might have met someone who can be that person but I'm still yet to feel that kind of connection and that significance.

But why can't I be nobody? That's what I am. The real me doesn't exist yet. Without a purpose or people significant to me to give meaning to my name I'm still only nobody. I don't know any of you, and you don't know me either. I'm not one to get close to just anyone, I have fake friends but now I want real ones. But until that day comes I'm still nobody.
But one last thing. You have a story. You have your highs and lows. You know how people say the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. How people want what they don't have. I would like a story, even a bad one. Even if it's just a struggle to survive it's a story. But I don't have any struggle. I don't have to worry about surviving, or having lows. I got nothing to begin with. I'm still nothing.

>>Everyone. I apologise if I gave the wrong impression of me, like I said I don't know how I came across. It's true that I'm lost and in many ways. I've had my perception change many times but after the first change I realised how empty I was. I feel like nothing is a good comparison for me. I don't have anything to lose. I can do anything at this point and I wouldn't care either way what happens. It's a hard situation to grasp I imagine but I nonetheless feel that it's true. It's not a simple problem that came up recently or anything but has been eating away at me for a very long time. I really don't know what I'm after or what else there is to say. I don't know how long this thread will be up for but I'll still be here to hear what you have to say. I got no reason not to and nothing to lose.
And like I said, don't hold anything back.

Nothing will begin if you just keep waiting.

Dear Nobody,

I can't say I know what its like to be in your spot as i've always had a purpose, but I know the feeling of not having friends, true friends. All I can say as a random stranger on the internet to you, is that you have to seek out the people you want to find, thier not going to simply stumble into your lap. Come hop on the drrr chat and hang with people, it might help in the mean time, you might find that person who has the other half, that person might just stumble into you, but the number one thing that will give you the best hope is to go out and find it, seek it out and be unrelenting. If you really need a purpose or a dream, start small, not grand. I hope this helps in anyway possible and I have to give you a big pat on the back, look at the step you already took, you reached out and people are trying to help!!! Some people are more blunt than others, but in the end most people care enought to pass on some insight. If you really need to talk try and find my name on the drrr chat, im usually around. Your not a nobody, your a person and you are you. Dont be afraid to push forward into the haze of the unknown.

I don't know other way to help, but words, so sorry.
We can be friends if you want to, it's an open invitation, but for the friend you are seeking for you are the only one who can find it and you have to try and seek ya know?
...etto, since i cant open the site from my phone, nor there are member profiles, and i can only open it once or twice the most per day, if you need more talk, here is my email: akane.hoshigawa@gmail.com
Lets seek some few things we need together, even if that means that you wont care for me or consider me fake friend.
Haha, i sound horrible no?

>>32 I could never get into drrr chat. I used to be on Darasu a lot but it's not there anymore. But yeah, like I said I'm not after encouragement, I guess that's just the natural reaction to my scenario though.

>>33 I suppose that's a fair enough idea, I emailed you but from a different name though.

>>Everyone. If anyone else wants to email me then feel free leave your email address. But like I said, I'm not after encouragement or just anyone as a friend. Please read my posts to get an understanding of what I'm like first.

I'll be happy to email you. nzpieface@hotmail.com

Im not checking my email so often so i leave my skype: werta50
:)

Hey kid. Sorry to hear you've lived 19 years and feel like you haven't done anything with any of it. But look at it this way: no one's life really has purpose. We're all equally insignificant. You're only as significant as you believe you are, and you can only act as significant as you believe you are. Start acting like your life means something, and it will to you. Or try the other way around, and it'll still work. Believe your life has meaning, and you'll start acting like it. Some people find meaning in religion, in service to their community, in family, or in forums like this, giving random anonymous people advice on how to live their lives, knowing full well that they themselves could be wrong. Just get up and do something about it. Go find your passion, and don't relapse in complacency.
TLDR - The only wrong thing to do is nothing.

First things first: would you rather change and start your journey or would you rather stay sheltered by your curtain of nothingness? That's really not obvious, even for oneself
I guess what I mean is that the fear of starting a story and it being just another bland façade could make one opt for not ever waking up, if you know what I mean. But still maybe you wanna risk it, so tell me: do you truly want to change?

The responses I get make me a little sad. It's frustrating hearing the same things over again. Being told the things that I've long since been aware of. I came here because I knew that I had to act because I can't just sit here but that's all you're telling me to do. I'm not scared of having a story I simply don't have one. I'm not after some kind of fake delusion to occupy my time and help me sleep at night. I want something real. I'm not going to alter my perception and bias myself so I can have a purpose. I'm not running away or hiding, I'm simply seeing it for what it is.

I don't hate any of you, nor do I take offense to what you said. Sure I'm angry but it's just because of how hard my position is for others to understand properly. If I were in anyone else's shoes then I probably wouldn't have been able to help me either. I appreciate the good intentions and apologise for the confusion.

So does anyone else have anything new to say?

If not then I will officially end this topic/thread.

Life is meaningless, deal with it. Do you think that a purpose will suddenly fall out of nowhere? No, it won't. You are not the only one feeling like that, but there are ways how to make those thoughts into positive ones, more or less.
For example, try reading philosophy. It's a medicine, I guarantee you.

You´re just acting like a typical boring human being that seeks something that´ll trigger your life to a new begining. First of all, you´re not alone, because you interact with other human beings, and even if nobody is around, you are in constant interaction with the environment. Second, your story has begun since the day you came to this World. We´re writing our story constantly. Also, if you feel like nothing would ever help you find the answer you´re seeking for, why not gathering some money and making a trip around the World? You might find what you´re looking for, and for sure you won´t find anything if you keep yoursel stuck in the same routine day after day. There´s a reason we came to this World: to evolve. Seeking new experiences to develop our inner self. There´s no hope, that´s something only an Idealist would base their lives on. Be Realist and see that only you can change your story, only you can make it happen. It won´t happen if you base your beliefs in a hope that won´t bring any difference to your current condition. You don´t have a future, and the past doesn´t exist anymore. You only have the present in your control to make it a change. Being a dreamer isn´t a solution, but being someone that believes that your story still needs to begin it´s only an obstacle you have placed in your path.

>>41 [2]

http://youtu.be/x7rsTjQfxmA

That's all I got. Hope it helps.

>>22 Well, that is a bit of a tough one. I could say so, but generally, it's a developmental process. For whatever reason, children are drawn to what they're exposed to and only take to certain things that interest them, for some reason. There doesn't seem to be any real rhyme or reason for it sometimes, and more often than not in adulthood those interests are then shaped into a career completely different from what they envisioned was involved with that interest. Maybe it's just the way someone views things, maybe it's just the way their subconscious and conscious mind works, but they're drawn to something and they try to become good at it. Generally this is something like drawing or writing, as a decent example. A kid sees something they really like, and they want to do stuff like that, because it seems cool to them. If you don't have that experience in childhood that'd be considered odd, right? If that's how it is with you, and this is how you've always seen life and the world at large, I suppose I can't force you into backtracking through your stages of development to relive childhood fancy.

>>44 So is that a no then? From my experience the deeper you look into things like choice the more life seems to be all about chance. What you said was true though, we choose what we do because of a whole lot of factors that influenced us as we grew up. And maybe it's as you said, I think I want to be a writer simply because I see good stories and want to be one of the people to make them. But who knows? I doubt we'll ever understand how this life is meant to work. It seems easy to find lies and biases but hard to find things that are actually real.

>>45 Reality is simply a choice, I find. You choose to believe what seems most reasonable to you, and you stick with that. But, if nothing makes sense to you, you can't put your faith in anything besides the supposed "truths" that you find in your experiences, like chance. So honestly, liking something isn't really a choice, per se. It's just something that makes life seem tolerable. Reasonable. Understandable. You stick with it because you believe it suits you better than anything else in the world, better than love, friends, anything. At the end of the day, when you're alone in your bedroom, what else do you have? For me, it's my artwork, and my music. If I didn't have the internet, if I didn't have friends, the few that I consider them to be, if I had nothing else, and I had no way out of life, all I could do is sit and sing. Sit and draw. Something, anything, to pull me out of the rift because no one else can, will, or wants to.

My reality is my imagination. Reality is my bane, it keeps me steadied in ways that I don't like, it reminds me that there are things I am supposedly obligated to because if I don't, then apparently I'm not living for myself.

But, if I'm supposed to be living for my family, my friends, for whatever future career I'm "supposed" to have, and so I don't end up "flipping burgers just because I don't see a point" as my teachers say. If I'm living for all this, who am I living for?

Who are you living for?