It's pretty normal for people to develop feelings for their therapist, especially in your situation. If you're serious about it, then you need to get your life straightened out. Complete your program, get healthy/medicated, and get back out into the world. If you still have feelings for her after you're stable and she's no longer your therapist, then you should definitely go for it. But you need to get you sorted out first.

Also, if you need anything, feel free to ask us. We'll try to help if we can. <3

You think it's possible? I guess I should wait. Mature a little more.

Dude, do not have a relationship outside of therapy with your therapist. She doesn't love you and she doesn't have feelings for you because it's part of her job to care and to help you. Literally just Google this, you'll find reasons why this is a shit idea.

>>4
Yeah that's what I was thinking too.

I've done some reading online. Yeah now I think it's a shit idea. I actually don't know my therapist that well. So there isn't much else to like about her. That makes it easier for me not to fall for her any further. But still I want to know more. When I open up to someone, it's only natural for me to want them to open up too.

It's given me this drive to be more attractive and cool. I find myself exercising, studying, and eating healthy more. I guess I'm going to have to be attractive for someone else.

Should I stop seeing a therapist now? I mean seeing her is causing me some serious emotional distress.

This hurts! Wow. I feel really depressed.

>>6 Yeah, if you don't think that you need a therapist anymore.

>>7 You'll find someone else. People develop intense feelings for each other in times of trial, and when you're of a sound mind and you have emotional stability you'll lose those feelings as quickly as you developed them.

I think you'll be okay,but I can't help but agree and say that this would be very ill idea to pursue. The way that she works, is that even though she is getting paid to do this, doesn't mean she doesn't care about you. Or any other for that matter. As an actual relationship on the other hand, is completely different. Your chances (no offence) are extremely low, but not impossible, but definitely not high enough to take the risk of serious heartbreak.

You're 18. I'm about to turn 19. When you want to think about how long you'll have to find someone perfect for you, just count.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 (I'm guessing around here maybe you actually started to think about dating someone) 16 17 18 (now it didn't take too long to get here right? And on) 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 (all these years, you'll have (and most likely more) to find that perfect girl for you)

Someone truly perfect might pass your way somewhere in all those years. I would keep seeing this therapist. Truly accept that she wants to help you. Enjoy and appreciate her help as it comes. Then on the day that you leave her, thank her for everything she helped you get through, and move on.

I'm a believer in that there is always a silver lining, and for you, it might just shimmer and catch your eye when you least expect it.

I wish you the best of luck. The dollars are always here to help. 😊 🍑

Thanks Zorli, YoloLord, and Kuronue.

I have another problem in regards to this.

I told my therapist's boss about how I was feeling towards her. I asked if I should leave her all together.

He said that I should stay and explore the feelings that I was having with her.

I immediately thought, wtf! Isn't that what you do when you want someone to like you back?

How in the world is telling my therapist that I like her going to make the situation any better?

I know that if I stand next to her any longer, much less talk to her or open up to her. I'll feel....this chain around my heart. That says you cannot love back, but only express. It's so hard.

I'm caught in between a rock and a hard place. I need someone to be open with. But also, I need someone to serve. Some I can be there for and protect when times are bad for them. Someone that I can heal. Someone that needs me!

I am by nature, A true Knight.

>>11 This therapist's boss is extremely unprofessional. Before you make any serious decisions, think about what this man wants to get from you. He wants your money. Therapy is a business, it's not charity, it's not a free service where everyone has people's interests at heart.

>>11 I'm with you. WTF? That is... pretty much not how it's supposed to work at all.

i um

>>12 I agree, with YoloLord. The Boss doesn't really care all too much if you have feeling for this woman. It's upsetting that he is using your feeling of love for her for his own self absorbed reasons.

Honestly HeartBeat, go for it.
Like Zorli said, (technically) you have a lot of time to cope from her and find someone else.

"Your chances (no offence) are extremely low, but not impossible, but definitely not high enough to take the risk of serious heartbreak"

Let me tell you something...I fell in love with someone older than me too once. I knew it wouldn't have worked from the beginning, but I went along with it because even though my brain was trying to out yell the screams of my heart, I ignored it.

I'm not saying that if you do somehow muster up the courage to confess, she'll accept your feelings and reciprocate, but that on the off chances that she /does/ you need to know that your heart can, and most likely will suffer from some serious pain if things go sour.

Things went sour for me and that girl. I spent almost an entire month in a living hell. I couldn't breathe, I didn't eat, I barely slept, but without a doubt in my mind, I would go through all that hell again to spend another week in that relationship.

I don't know if you read Zorli's old thread, and no offense Zorli if I am speaking out of place, but if I may go as far to say that I think you, Zorli, could have another week with Celty, would you not go for it? And I know that you're (most likely) still in a new relationship with (pardon, I forgot her alias), and even I know you wouldn't admit it, but everyone dwells on the past longer than they should.

I wish you the best of luck HeartBeat. I know that its almost a death sentence I told you to volunteer for, and you will regret it if things go sour, but myself, coming from experience, know that that's what I (personally) think.

Good Luck, and I hope your heart is as tough as your name implies it to be.

I think you should go for it as well. It may be depressing and painful for you to keep wondering what will happen. Unless you actually talk to her and see how she responds, the wondering will be way worse. At least if you find out there's a chance it can go well. If not, you know you tried. Good luck with whatever you choose to do!

I know in my heart I'm truly not in love with my therapist. I'm just burning for a relationship right now and that has caused me to turn towards anyone who is caring and attractive.

I'm not going for it. Instead I'm going to work hard at becoming this awesome guy that everyone wants to be around. And some day she'll poke her finger over my shoulder and say "hey I couldn't help but notice you singing over there".

I'm not like most men. I don't pursue women, rather they pursue me. I have to be the attractive one. The prey.

Well this all could be for nothing. But in the end I think I'll come out on top as a better person after this.

Good luck!! :)

Okay, While reading this post I've wanted to say a buncha things, but it seems that most people have ended up doing so for me already.
At first, I thought your therapists' boss was right, that you should explore your feelings for her.
Actually...
Now that I type that, it doesn't seem like that bad of an idea.
If you want to find out if you truly love her instead of just speculating, just test the water out any way you can to see if what you're feeling is true.
What I suggest is that you tell her "Hey, I think I'm in love with someone, I feel 'da da da da (enter information here)' about her, but considering our situation I'm feeling very unsure about what I should do."
From then on she will probably ask for more details, to which you can say as much as you can w/o revealing that it's her. Lie if you have to. In the end, just wait to see what happens.

Just brilliant. Didn't think of that. Wow!

Something else I need to ask.

How am I supposed to keep up with an older women?
I'm 18 and she's probably like 26 or 27. That's almost a decade over me.

My weaknesses are...
Way Younger
Less educated,
Seriously Broke
I'm a compulsive idiot
I tell dumb lies
I make mistakes all the time.
I'm super forgetful
Some people say I'm an enigma
And I'm a little scared and nervous to be doing this. (but still compelled.)

Strengths
I'm in college.
I have a good heart.
I'm poetic.
At least decently Romantic
Thoughtful.
A solid 8 on a good day.
I'm in a band.
I do parkour.
Photography.
Intuitive
Perceptive

Just some basic things about me.

So with all that. How am I supposed to get an older women to like me?

>>22 Man, don't even consider dating her. Other women will come and go and you will find someone else.

She is an older woman, your *therapist*, how fucked do you think that a relationship like that is going to be? The feeling that you think that you have is superficial and it is purely because you are going through a period of emotional turmoil. Don't do something that you will regret.

>>23 Yeah, this. You've trusted her and it seems to have paid off, but it's her job. That relationship is not really well founded for that reason, I don't think. It'd be more difficult than just knowing you have feelings for someone, and even that's hard for a lot of people. I'd say, don't.

Get your shit together first bro, your options will open up to you once you start carrying yourself better, your too young to get fucked yet so there should be plenty of opportunity for your future. Keep your head in the game man!

I thought I was over this. But I'm not.

About two or three weeks ago I stopped seeing my therapist completely hoping that I would stop having feelings for her.

Just a week ago I left a message on her phone, basically telling her how I feel. I told her that I was done with therapy and that I never wanted to be her patient again. I also told her that I was feeling like less of a person because of how much she's "out of my league".

Today I've come to terms with how I feel. I put away all the guilt and stopped judging myself. It's horrible guys!

HORRIBLE!

I'm actually in love with her. Gosh what a pain. It's worse than before. I think about her more and I just miss her more. I would very much like the pain in my heart to go away. But I feel like the only way is for me to go back and tell her everything. Also for her to accept me fully?
Am I acceptable enough yet? Am I worthy?

Damn it feels like shit. But the very thought of going back actually also feels like a relief. I mean I'm scared too. She could literally say anything that could hurt me.But she could also accept my love. (very slim chance). I feel fragile and weak. My power externalized. What should I do? What would you do?