My friend is going threw a lot and I can't help her. I try to talk with her and try to comfort her but she yells at me that I don't understand and leaves. I really don't understand. I'm mistaking her problems for other things. She's my best friend yet I can't even help her with ANYTHING! I must me really goddamn stupid if I can't even comfort a person! PLEASE. Tell me how to understand her situations better. My life is just so damn perfect that I can't understand the shithole that she's in.

Ask her if she wants to talk about in a polite, calm way and if she does than just listen and try your best to help her out. If she doesn't then respect her wishes and go on about your life until she wants you to help her.

I've done that already. I've waited for her to explain to me but then I give the wrong advice to her or I just sit there staring like a fucking idiot. I'm terrified of her just one day saying that she hates me and leaving.

You can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved. And you can't be psychic either (unless that's a talent of yours). If your friend wants your support, then tell her that she needs to explain things to you clearly. Then think over what she tells you and tell her what you would honestly do.

But if she rejects you, or leaves, that doesn't say anything bad about you. It's about her. You're not stupid. You're doing your best. And you're a great friend for continuing to try to help her when the situation is so tough. :)

If she's going through a hard time and you comforting her elicits a negative reaction, then your help is unwarranted or she's looking for someone to get angry at because things aren't going well for her. She'll come around, just be there for her if that's what you believe she needs.
If your friendship ends because of this, then honestly, just move on. It's not worth it being friends with someone mentally weak.

Two words...HUG...HER...

LOL :v what a probelmatic friend just ignore her

>>7 You are a fagget, that's all.

Jack no calling each other bundle of sticks
We can't help people if we are fighting ourselves. Now this person may need help and that's why they came to us. So we are gonna help them.
Have you told your friend how you feel about it? True you may not be able to help but I know just talking can. If they yell try calming them down.

Whatever. I give up. I can't help her and everyone here is dying to leave her. She's my best friend. My only friend that cares about me. I'm trying to do the same for her; but I can't do shit due to me lacking the knowledge of understanding her emotions. I'm just going to let this continue... There nothing I can do about it...

Try this, tell her how YOU feel not being to help your friend, raise your voice for yourself. Tell her she is your best friend, and she's hurting you! Change the subject from her to you.

(if you think, it's ok, try giving her a slap)

Sorry for the radical idea, but I think it could work

Don't give up! And I agree with >>11. Talk about your feelings. Tell her what YOU need, namely, for her to give you something to work with. You can do it!

You need to give more info, you say she's in pain but from what? You're asking for advice but nobody can give you any good advice without more information. How are you supposed to help someone when you don't even know the problem?

She's in ROTC at school. She wants to leave but she says that if she leaves that colleges don't like it. They won't accept her of she leaves but the ROTC is so stressful for her. She has a medical condition that gets worse with stress. On top of that she gets constantly yelled at by her parents for things she can't even control. So she comes to me for help or to calm herself down, Ginger.

I used to be in ROTC in Uni and I dropped out of it. Your friend will not get in any trouble nor will she have a hard time getting into another university as long as her grades are good. if she does have a medical condition she can get out as long as she gets something from her primary care provider that states that she is not fit for military duty.
However if she is under contract and she decides to drop out of rotc, she will have to go to basic and go in the service but not as an officer
If she did not sign the contract then she can drop whenever.

She needs to stop worrying about everything, she's stressing herself out and needs to learn how to not care about things as much as she does. She's volatile and the best way to help her is to get her mind off the world. The more she worries the worse she'll get. This isn't a matter of if you can help her this is a matter of can she help herself. She needs to realize that she's the problem and that she needs to manage her stress better.

If the nice girl could just "stop worrying", she probably would've done it already. As for your friend, she won't have any trouble if she leaves ROTC. Tell her to keep her grades up and make sure she tests well. Clubs and volunteer work look good, so if any of those are less stressful for her, she can just replace it. As for her parents, just remind her that she's almost out. Once she's at Uni, she won't have to deal with it anymore. Until then, be there for her as much as you can. <3

Thank you Kuronue, you're a big help. I'll try to get her to calm down. I'll distract her. If she yells at me now, I found out my own solution. Yelling gets rid if stress, right? So if she yells at me it's a good sign. I'll tell her; maybe even show her what you all said about ROTC and her parents.