Hi i always find myself weird i like to go the graveyards in the early mornings or late evening. I always have to put on a mask where i am a fun person which is really tiring. my dad is always drunk and likes to abuse me but not phicically but mentaly. and some times i like to think about ways to kill those i hate. i think sleeping in a coffin sounds nice. and i really need help or at lest someone to talk to. please help me.

Hmmm...Well they do say to visit the graveyards to remind ourselves of our fate. But I think instead of going to the graveyard you should choose a more lively place, push those comfort zones.

And another things is, you seem to be 'socially' tired. Trust me I know how that feels. Not sure if you're at school, but going out and randomly talking to people would greatly help in your situation. People at bus stops, waiting at the shop counters, etc etc.

Also, it's sad to hear that abuse like this is carried out on you, be it physical or mental. I can't do much but this helped me, don't cave in and be open minded. You will break that chain this way. I'll share with you something, there was a time I became pretty dark and isolated, I did think of these violent thoughts and I felt I had no control. I had a knife in my hand while I was working in the kitchen and someone began to pester me in my irritated state. I pointed that knife, but I quickly put it to rest, have to admit I wasn't myself that day and I was grateful I didn't do anything else. Never let your inner demon get to ya.

mmm...Sleeping in a coffin doesn't sound like a good idea, not comfy either.