I don't know how to describe it, but it's everywhere and can be seen in all people, and the more i'm able to identify it, the more it targets me. the more i acknowledge it, the more the people that have this in them attack me. it's not spiritual in anyway, but it's... not evil. I don't know, I know it's bad, and it disgusts me. I hate the mere sight of it, I can't stand the fact that it exists and it drives me crazy... Even thinking about it makes me start to become unstable, makes me become on-edge, and lose my composure. Likes it's doing to me right now.

Makes me want to lose control.

But I've had to learn how to cope with it. The thing is, no one see's this in them, and when i try to get them to understand, they attack me full force, but when it shows itself, they are not themselves, it's not natural, it's not supposed to be there, but it's not evil. it's like they're living in a fairy-tail, a delusion, i use to think everyone was ignorant, but then i learned that that's not it. I feel very different from others, i feel like i'm on the outside looking in, and that makes me very sad. I see this in others, i know it's not supposed to be there, i see it hurt them, and i hate it. that makes me very angry.

But i see that it makes them happy when it works with them, the ones that somehow know how to use it, to let people live in peace and harmony almost unconditionally, and that makes me very happy, because like i said, it's not evil, and it's in no way spiritual. I'm not saying I've never done wrong or that i'm perfect, but cause i'm the furthest thing from but somehow through my mental defect i can see this, and it is very real.

Is it something you sense almost like a 6th sense or you can actually see it? reminds me of xxxHolic.

I get what you're saying here. There's not exactly a name or anything I can attach to it, nor do I have any way of explaining this cleary (some help I am, huh?). But it makes sense. I didn't know this was visible in any way, though. I think it's kinda cool that you can see it.

I didn't expect anyone to comment on this, thank you for that. I"m glad to see some positive comments after this.

:) Thanks, mang(s). >>2>>3

Hey there...your post really caught my eye...but Im not perfectly understanding what you mean by "it"...Id like to discuss it with you further as it interests me deeply :)

same here. I don't understand what you mean by 'it'. Are you talking about some kind of angels? Does it feel like it's like humans? I'm really interested too!

By the way, can you actually see them or do you feel them? Can you please give me details on their behaviour? Like what makes them work together with or against the host?

it caugth my eye too,but i don't really understand,it will be good if you could be more specific

I must admit, Ive seen somethings...when you talk, it sounds as if its spiritual...but you say its not...thats what really interests me since my family has something similar since its it in someones body, but different in a way

I would like to know what is "it".

I heard stories and sh#t of ghosts, but imma tell you of one that you never thought of before.
There was this one ghost in my aunt's friends home when she was a little girl. Basically, add they went to the top floor that no one uses, they saw this shadow of a human.

They funny thing is, the friend gave that"thing" a look and said something like, "Really, n#gga? Did you not read the papers of this house? This belongs to me and my familia. So get the f#ck out".
My aunt was like, "Great. Another f#cktard."

....Apparently where my familia is from, they don't give two sh#ts about ghosts and whatever cause they practically grew up with them.

Are you the same?

I'm with them, this is really interesting and I would like to know more about what you think. In a way, I think I understand what you mean.

I perceived this as just the way of things. As crazy as it seems to me, people don't really stop and think about how they basically go about their daily lives. They just do. I agree with you in that I don't believe it is spiritual. I feel like it's fate, or the flow of the universe or something like that. I know that's most likely not what you think of it, but that's just the way I interpreted this.

It's like some invisible force of both good and evil, balance. It does bad things and good things to everyone. It doesn't discriminate. People can't see it because they don't acknowledge or believe it's there, mainly because they just don't think about it. When anything happens, people associate with things that they can tangibly grasp. Things that would make sense to them and something that they believe is a realistic cause. They don't see it because it's not something that is easily seen. They don't see it or even know it's there because only certain people, like you, can see it, or can sense it.

It's like you said, you feel like you're outside looking in. Everything around you is a giant bubble, and you've fallen out. On the inside, everyone is stuck within their own minds, within the 'delusion' as you said. You can see what's really happening and you know what's really going on. You can see everything that's happening to them and why, but you can't tell them about it, because they are all inside the bubble and your voice has fallen on deaf ears. You've woken up, while the rest of us are all still asleep.

Does any of this make sense? I'm sorry if I just made this more complicated and it really has nothing to do with what you talked about or how you feel. As I said before, this is just the way I see it. I'm still very interested in your own personal thoughts and I really want to know more about this.

To be honest, I can make a lot of sense of it...I think that "it" is something that chooses your soul as you exit the beyond and enter this world...it enhances your abilities when it wants and uses them when its in its favor...whatever it is...the thing why the people dont notice it is that they live with it from the start and it all seems natural to them...it seems as its a part of them...there is one way for them to notice, but it requires their soul to be of certain age and certain level of self awareness...

It takes to be able to feel what is of you and what is not, to know there is something more in there

Been wonderin if anyone plans on discussing it further...

>>13 I do, but I'm still kinda waiting to see what >>1 is going to say. But yeah, I agree with you too. What you're saying makes sense.

"..the thing why the people dont notice it is that they live with it from the start and it all seems natural to them...it seems as its a part of them."

I think that's also another reasonable explanation. Something that we're born with.

I had this dream the other night.

I saw this dog like creature with the face and paws of a hyena. It's other features can't be described. It was.. strange.

I remember it multiplying in this blank white environment. It looked back at me.

I immediately felt afraid. Very fucking afraid! It was afraid too.

I immediately turned around and bent over. Then I could feel it starting to enter my body and it felt so real. This bright light appeared and then I rekindled my wall.

This wall of flames that I use to doubt and question everything before accepting them into my heart.

I can still feel the chills up down my spine. Even as I'm writing this. Like it's still trying to enter. I haven't decided yet whether or not to accept it or fight it off. I mean fucking kill it. (oops there goes my aggression.)

What have I done to attract this entity? I know it's real. I know it wants to go inside of me. But then what?

My back feels so cold. So sensitive. If I focus enough. I can feel myself being touched. Somethings about to change in me. Something big.

My head is splitting in two.

(whisper)William. Something is changing in you.

This is the part where Neyo Flew. You will too.

I love you son.