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Adivce on getting over my job fears (4)

1 Name: Dioleag!wYygCyWbiI : 2014-09-16 17:26 ID:9dbhT405 [Del]

So since I had to quit my last job, for reasons that are to much work to type at the moment, I've had a sort of anxiety over applying for another one. I'm constantly afraid of screwing something up at my next job, or the threat of being fired because I get sick. This is all made worse because I'm a "social-phobic" person, (I know that it is no longer considered a phobia.) and I freak out at the thought of having to interact with a huge amount of possibly angry customers at once.
Now my last job got crowded and had obnoxious drunk people almost every night, but I had a number of places where I could take a quick breather and recompose myself before heading back to work. Though the job itself got so stressful at times I took up some very bad habits, and had almost constant panic attacks whenever I though about when I'd be heading into work.

I really don't expect another job to have any sort of safety net for me, so I'm starting to panic over the possible worst case scenarios if I get employed again. As in what if I had a panic attack during my shift? What if my boss doesn't understand if I'm too sick to work? (This is what happened at my last job.) What if I'm harassed by the other employees? I know I'd be to scared to speak up to a manager or say anything at all. My biggest fear is that I'll start to push myself too hard again, because when I do that I tend to become a much colder, crueler person, and have little thought about anything other than what my job entails. It's all really terrifying to me.

I mean I got over it enough to put in an application somewhere, but the fact that I had to include a resume brought all my worries back to the forefront of my mind. Please can someone give me advice on how to get over some of these fears? I need to start bringing in a paycheck so that I start to move forward with my life.

2 Name: Slacker !IUZzEys2W6 : 2014-09-16 21:19 ID:SlcqHtex [Del]

This response is from someone who was in the exact same position as you- me.
My first job was being a cart pusher. I knew I had issues dealing with people, but I wanted a job so that I could get out of the house and do something with my life. My job made me feel worse than having no money, so I tried to quit, but they said that they valued me as an employee and gave me a different job in the same place. I cried every morning before work, every time I was on break I hid in the bathrooms and cried, and every night I would fall into terrible habits. I cut myself on multiple occasions in despair. I had no idea what to do with myself, the pain was intolerable. I ended up sick becuase of anxiety, and then sick from the flu, and I was fired. The only reason I even have a job right now is because my sister's friend offered me a job. I don't work with customers, only my coworkers. And yeah, sometimes they're a bunch of jerks, but you learn to deal with it. I think of it as a sort of family, as my own was always very dysfunctional. I just think about getting to the end of the day and leaving. You might be able to find a job near you where you work behind the scenes. For example, I work at a candy store. I love it! I know that not all bosses are as understanding as mine, but bathroom breaks are a good time to just take a breather. If I'm feeling overwhelmed, I go to the bathroom and I just sit there and wait for my emotions to pass. On my break I write or listen to music or whatever feels like it will make me feel better at the time. Does this help at all?

3 Name: DaiMajutsu13 !0UZD1OR/j. : 2014-09-17 04:08 ID:WHTF9o3t [Del]

I don't mean to be a smartass here, but I'm gonna try to boil down your problem from a different perspective than the average human.
Having the fear of something, or fearing something is always rooted deeply in the fear of not knowing what will happen to us, how the effects of our environment will affect us in the future. Basically it stems from not knowing. Not knowing how to deal with a fight, not knowing what your coworkers will think about you behind your back if you fuck up, not knowing what's in the dark lurking in the unlit kitchen next to yesterday's frozen lasagne, not knowing why the little girl can climb through the tv, or what else she is capable of, and how that affects our survival.
So basically first thing first, you have to find out, what that thing is, that tickles your survival-instinct-bone. What you would like to know about the tomorrow you fear. It's probably something about humans so I'll give you a general piece of advice below, but what specifically you can't handle, that's all up to you to explore.
So about that advice. I truly believe you need to understand people. Actually human beings work very simply, because they only try to make the best choices out of self-interest in context of their individual background and environment, and that's especially true for the system we live in presently. (You might ask, "But there's also humans who do acts of kindness, and that dosen't seem like self-interest. For example, charity. They don't get anything out of it do they?" If you believe that, than I can accept that, but I also don't believe it to be true.Regardless, that's a topic I could do an entire response on alone, so let's leave that part for later) What you need to understand about humans you can't handle imo, is what context, what background they might come from, and how that relates to how they will behave with you. If you come to an understanding regarding how people treat you, it won't be scary anymore to interact with people. In the contrary. It will be very self-explanatory from the point on, where you can approximate, why and how people handle different events interactions coming from their environment.
Well, I could've cut this response shorter but well...whatever, I hope it helps ;)

4 Name: Dioleag!wYygCyWbiI : 2014-09-17 12:13 ID:9dbhT405 [Del]

Thank you both for the advice.
>>2 You help to give me hope that I may yet survive in a workplace environment.

>> You brought up a point that I hadn't realized myself. I really don't understand humans. That may play a larger part in my fear than I ever realized before. This lack of understanding comes from my own background, which is what must have caused me to over look this fact.

I don't feel as freaked out now that I have read what you've both had to say. It helps a lot, thank you again.