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How to Help when Help is not Desired (6)

1 Name: alien : 2014-09-07 04:57 ID:hAOwKgCt [Del]

Hello, I'm new to these threads so please excuse me if I'm doing something wrong!

Recently an online friend of mine has been feeling rather suicidal. I am aware that he attempted to commit suicide four years ago, and turns out he attempted it again.

Despite never meeting him Ii'd constantly message him and try to give him hope - trying to make him view things without such pessimistic thoughts, but it just does not help.

I understand that due to his depression he may not be able to help it, but I've been trying and trying and I feel like I'm only pestering him now.

It's just so upsetting when someone doesn't see how much they're worth. He is a phenomenal poet, yet he classes himself as "average".

I just don't know what to do anymore, I don't know how to help.

Sorry if this is a silly thread, I'm new to this. But if you could give me ANY advice I would truly appreciate it.

Thank you, have a wonderful day!

2 Name: Reverie : 2014-09-07 08:35 ID:vboro/OM [Del]

hmm.. try to engage in his interest. If cheering him up doesn't work then try to learn his passion. Talk about poems or anything similar to it. Say like, "i made this poem could you check it out?" I really don't know how to deal with suicidal people, but i guess if they find someone with the same interest as him he wouldn't feel alone, probably.

3 Name: alien : 2014-09-07 09:45 ID:hAOwKgCt [Del]

Thank you very much for your advice!

I'd say the reason we became close in the first place was due to our similar interests but he's just seems to have forgotten everything. It's like he's blind to every good thing there is to look forward to. └(T_T;)┘

Thank you for posting, have a wonderful day!

4 Name: ChocolateSquirrel : 2014-09-08 14:39 ID:Q7CXGKLY [Del]

Well, I think if you're friends because you have common interests but lately he doesn't want to do any of that, I guess trying to remind him of how fun those things are could help. Like just trying to have as much fun as possible.

5 Name: Kib_ : 2014-09-08 19:33 ID:B4A1hdmq [Del]

I have been through the suicidal thoughts thing before so I see what the problem is. Try to help help him make more friends. I learned that not everyone thinks I am or below average, I learned it by making friends, a d learning that they think think I'm special in my own way, not just average.

6 Name: DaiMajutsu13 : 2014-09-09 08:59 ID:WHTF9o3t [Del]

I'd also consider this. The root cause of true suicidal tendencies are that the person doesn't value his life anymore. So the question that you can ask yourself is what you can do to bring value into his life? What would make him not want to die yet? What would make him think he still has something to lose with suicide? If you give him hope that may look like it's helping him, but doesn't contribute any value to his life from his own perspective.
What I would try to do in your place is (since you kind of can't be direct about these things with these type of people) to trick him into finding value in his own life. Here's a cheesy example: you convince him, that if he writes a good enough poem, he will be able to make the girl he loves fall for him, so he finds purpose in getting better at writing. Since he would now be motivated but still wouldn't value his life, you make him consult about his writing with others, who have similair interests, so they give him feedback of his own value. That would reinforce the fact to value his own life in himself. He would have something to lose if he were to die.
Hope I wasn't too nosy about the subject, well anyhow, good luck