Ok..here is the deal..everyone says to express they're to somebody instead in keeping it bottled up inside. I have keep it in for so long idk what to do and i can tell my parents because they don't understand. Anyway my problem is hard to explain. You see i feel REALLY neglected in school and my own house. I am the oldest, the middle child should be feeling this pain but i always have felt like the one in the middle.For example, i feel like my mom wanted a boy but got me. I feel like i would/ve been aborted, she values my brother more than me and my dad (who lives with us) like my little sis more than me..weshoule be a perfect family but i feel alone. In school i feel like my friends dont like me and i have this one friend who acts like a thot but i dont hate her, i should but i cant idk why. All she as ever done is seperate me from my besties from previous years and evn my crush hates me beacuse i am her friend.I wish i can tell her all this but if i do she would think i hate her and willI also feel insignificant( like i cant draw, i suck in school and i am terrible in violin, etc.) i wish i could just kill myself but i dont want to. Other than that in the middle of class i just start crying and every night i cannot sleep. This is killing me..pls someone can u help me in what to do? Pls help a fellow dollar out..

Hey dont be so hard on yourself i've always felt like this but i started to see that although you are feeling that you are neglected and alone but you're parents are the people who will always adore you and love you maybe because you are not showing your feelings that they think everything is alright?

I think, if you cant reach out to friends nor family ( most of the time we never can ) then set your mind onto something else to distract problems in life. I dont mean run away from your problems im just saying ignore the bad and feel the good. Dealing with life can be hard, there are things u can reach out to such as music (listen to it), and mabye a "My spot". I know a "My spot" seems awkward, but if u go to a place where u are comfortable, go to it. Get away from the siblings and family, and go to a place where u can say "I am enjoying myself". We all sometimes feel those moments where reaching out to someone is not an idea, and those times where u just want to scream your problems at someone ( as if they can help ). NO one knows what your going through but you. Always expect that, not in a bad way. Look toward the future, this can help with suicidal problems. If you forget a life you don't necessarily like and look toward what your's can be. You will be fine. I hope you find your fit in life. =3

i know how you feel. i always felt like an oddball :( can't really help you but i want you to know your not alone

i know how you feel. i always felt like an oddball :( can't really help you but i want you to know your not alone

I know how you feel. For starters, I just wanna tell you that. I don't feel that way anymore, but I used to when I was younger. I overcame it, and so will you. I know it might sound cheesy and stupid, but I truly believe everyone was born for a purpose. There is a reason, a good reason, that you are here on this earth. You just have to go out there and find it. What do you like to do? What makes you happy? If you know, pursue that. Even if you don't think you are any good at it, believe me, practice and concentration make you a lot better. If you don't know what makes you happy, your going to have to reach out into the world of possibilities and try (and possibly fail or dislike) multiple things until you find your thing, but you will.
About the situation with your friends at school, it sounds like that one girl you were talking about (from my perception at least), is causing you a lot of problems in your life. If you think she is trying to ruin your friendships with your other friends, (I don't know if that's what you were saying, but it seemed like it), maybe you should try talking to her about it. Don’t accuse her when doing so, but maybe tell her how what she’s doing is making you feel. Ask her if you’ve done something to make her not like you. If she’s your friend, she’ll want to work it out. If she's not trying to ruin your friendships, but just causing other problems, maybe try distancing yourself from her a little bit. Also I think if you feel your friends are neglecting you, you should try to find some new ones. That can easily happen as you are trying new things to find an interest. Get involved in clubs and teams where you can bond over a similar interest, even if it's something as random as "movie club" or something. It's something to start the convo, and who knows? You could make a good friend! ;)
Lastly, don't let yourself even think about killing yourself. It might take awhile, but you WILL come out of this and you will be stronger. I'm sorry my reply was so long, but having felt this way once myself, I really wanted to help, I hope this does. Keep your chin up, and always know you have us back here in the Dollars who are always here for you. ;)