So lately I've been thinking that I've been wasting my life. It really seems to me like I don't have what other people would call a fulfilling life. I'm a 19 year old college student, I don't have a job (but not from lack of trying at least), never had a girlfriend (nothing anywhere close to one either), and I rarely ever see any of my friends. I don't know, it just feels like nothing is going right for me, and sometimes I feel like it would be better to just stop trying to achieve an "ideal" life.

It's not like I don't want a girlfriend, it's just that I'm not the most charismatic fish in the sea. My only charm points are that I'm a gentleman and that I respect a lady's wishes. But, my not-so-good points are that I'm a little overweight and I have a pretty off putting mug (at least I think I do). And even if I did manage to get a girlfriend, she'd probably get tired of me quick and move on.

I don't really have any dreams or aspirations either. Really all that I want is to be able to live comfortably, I don't want any luxurious house or foreign sports car or anything like that. I just want enough to take care of myself.

I don't really know what to do with myself, I've been applying to more jobs recently but I never hear anything back from them and all the girls that I hang out with already have boyfriends. I just wanted to vent, but if anyone has any kind of advice or anything I'm glad to hear it.

You're still young!! You have a long time to do whatever with your life. To me, relationships aren't that important. Maybe you'll feel better if you get involved with something you really like. Sorry if this doesn't really help, but I tried. Try to stay positive! (≧ω≦)

You should stop trying to achieve an 'ideal' life. That's my advice. It's not easy to get a job, don't let the hoards of people that have one convince you to think otherwise. Living comfortably is all I want myself...however, my idea of living comfortably means living in a world that is not insidiously toxic or unpredictable in highly dangerous ways... so...I end up being a very busy person trying to achieve a 'comfortable' life.

You could always hire yourself a cuddle girl, I hear they fill that void quite well! Though with your financial situation that might have to be put on hold...maybe those girls you hang out with wouldn't mind cuddling for free?

I feel like I can relate; I'm graduating high school in a few days and everyone around me seems to be moving on whether it be to a dream college or a head start in their careers. I've never had a relationship, and I can never really call my classmates 'friends’. I feel that I'm a late bloomer with this whole college thing, because in my senior year I finally decided what to do with my life.

In short, I felt like a loser compared to all the people around me who seemed so much more motivated. But, I realized that maybe I don't have to have everything planned out. It's hard to change the nature of someone who just 'goes with the flow', but I don't think you should give up. I don't have a step-by-step plan on my future, I just know that I want to live a happy life. Every time someone asked me about my future, they'd think that I was undecided when I said that I just want to be happy. I’m always such a negative person, so thinking about a life where I smile till it hurts is a true dream. It's simple and to me, fulfilling. Of course you have to work for it –you get out of life what you put into it. I dream about doing what I love, and I am convinced to work hard for that happiness.

So, enjoy the small things in life, and look at things in a positive way. Do the things you enjoy, whether it be watching a show, cooking, exercising, playing an instrument; alone time is a great way to get in touch with yourself before you consider going into a serious relationship. Get to know yourself on a better point of view, and learn to respect yourself and the choices that you make. It’s so easy to be negative and to give up, so I live as a challenge to myself, if that makes any sense.

So please don’t put yourself down, because we are all our own worst enemies. Didn’t get the girl? That just means that there’s someone out there who is still waiting for you. Applying for jobs means that rejection is an option, but it’s something that everyone learns to overcome. You say that your appearance may not be the best, but you won’t be this way forever. You know what you want to change, you just need to take that one step to do so. So what are you waiting for? Don’t let the world go round without you; you’ve got one life and it’s in your hands to make it worth living.

I’m not so sure if this is much help (and I didn't expect it to be this long!), but please don’t give up! We all have out highs and lows, but no one said that life would be easy.

And never forget, “The world isn’t as bad as you think”. ☺

>>1 you're 19 not 50. You may not want the "ideal" life that most people do however, having a comfortable life is your ideal. If you can't find a job then keep trying to educate yourself in order to qualify for other careers, or apply to jobs that you wouldn't normally apply for. Create something, take up a new hobby, try something healthy and new. Explore your opinions. Better yourself.
I read a really interesting self-improvement article and one of things that it stated was that being a "nice guy" doesn't get you anywhere. Being a nice guy isn't going to make the world give you everything that you want. You need to focus and work on your skills, your confidence, your charisma, one step at a time. You need to believe that you can do it, and with time you will. Don't get discouraged okay?
Life is perpetual change so every morning that you wake up, make sure that those changes are for the better.
I'm 18 and even I wonder if I'm good enough, should I even bother? Will I just end up as another suicide? Yeah those doubts suck but that doesn't stop me, doesn't stop me from trying. I often wonder "Who would ever love someone like me? How could they? I'm a concoction of facades and personas, innocence and twisted thoughts." But I still wake up every morning and take care of myself, dress myself, put my makeup on just so I can possibly shoot a flirtatious smile at a boy (or a girl). Sure it's easy to get discouraged with finding romance but sometimes that someone else might smile back, and that's the first step.
Keep up the effort, discouragement isn't your friend, but the power of your own will is. Good luck to you!

Who said you have to achieve that mysterious level of "fulfillment" in life before a certain deadline? You're getting education right now - and you're actually trying to change your employment status. I rarely see my friends, too. If I really want to, I could always make a simple "Hello, just thought to catch up with you on things." call once every two weeks.

The term 'ideal' is subjective and varies from person to person. What someone idolises as the "perfect life" could mean little to another individual. If you already set an image for yourself to realise, then move towards it step by step; Rome wasn't built in a day. Your life isn't going to magically become awesome in fortnight either. Appreciate the accomplishments you've achieved and chalk up the difficulty a little more as your next goal.

If you acknowledge that your overweight is a disadvantage to you meeting someone, then do something about it. There's no point in admitting, "Yeah, I know it's not helping me." and not changing it. If under any circumstances that it's hazardous for you to reduce that spare tyre 'round your waist, then make it up with another charm. A practical skill that is considered attractive; cooking, for example.

... I've been raised in Asia all my life and I have never heard of the term "off putting mug". o.o'

And about being bored: solution - don't be boring. Just because you don't have big dreams and try to shoot for the stars it doesn't make you boring. Before you try dating, learn to enjoy your own company. That way, you know what's fun about yourself, so explore that. And if you meet someone who's interested in you, explore together.

Sucks that there's no wind about your job applications (I know how that feels).

The thing about looking for someone is that, when we're actively searching, we give off a subtle impression that we're "desperate". You then become someone's option. There's a subconscious thought, then, that goes along, "I can take my time deciding since this person isn't going anywhere any time soon."

My advice? Don't give off that vibe. When you start appreciating yourself, people get attracted to that confidence. That self-esteem doesn't have to be extrovert-like. You can be demure but still pleasant to be with because you like yourself. People get infected with that appreciation too - especially if you're a gentleman who respects a lady's wishes.