Hello...
I am 17 and the oldest daughter of my family. I've got a wonderful sister and a truly caring mom and dad... But here:

Since a few years, my mom started drinking, and now... well she gets drunk like every two days. I do no longer live with my parents since I started college, so my sister and my dad are alone to deal with her. She truly is a wonderful person, or at least she was. But now... Honestly we don't even recongnize her. When she doesn't drink it's okay, but the air in always tense at home. My sister is always escaping, going to some friends house. I barely saw her during the last year. Not that I could blame her anyway... My father is honestly the best man one could ever wish for. He really does all he can... He's got three jobs, not that they pay few... He works at the government and that doesn't even suffice. He is ALWAYS working, weekends, summer, day, night... I feel bad for him. My mom works too, but... Her alcool cost like 5500$ a year. At least. My sister and I went to a private highschool and she still does, while I graduated and live in an appartment. She works, I do not, even if I wish I did. Anyway. Just to say that our financial situation is thight. Really thight. My father is always thinking about money, it became an obsession. Not that we could blame him, but it just helps to create fights with my mom. And of course, after that she drinks. Of course. And whatever we say to her, she just doesn't understand. If there was one thing I knew my parents wished for us, they told us all our childhood, it's that they would pay for our studies. But now she doesn't even seem to CARE. I mean, if there was another reason I would not complain about it, I don't really mind working for my studies but... It's just that she is not the same person. And I truly wish that my father could separate himself from her, but he CAN'T. He can't because if he does that, she will just drink like a hole and at some point end her life. Oh yeah, cuz she is depressive too. And my father even says that he doesn't mind to help her financially if they get separated, but he doesn't want to pay for her alcool. Which is exactly what would happen. I love my mom, but I ... I wish this never happened. We were perfectly happy, my family was THE thing I would nevere complain about, and now I just wish I could get away from here forever. I know my mom is sick, that alcoolism and depression are illnesses (though she gets treatment for depression) but she doesn't want to hear anything. There is no way she would listen to us, and we are just... condamned to look at her destroying herself and us. I don't know what to do. We cannot force her to get a treatment, but this situation cannot last any longer. I fear that my sister is going to do something bad if this continues, and my father doesn't deserve that. I know that my sister wanted to stay home for her studies, but if they get separated... I think I'll ask her to come live with me. But... honestly, if only my mother stopped, if only she listened to us, we could avoid all that. It seems so simple, yet is seems impossible. I am just tired of this situation... Tired and scared.

I don't even know why I posted this, but if any of you got advices, have ever been in a similar situation or just... I don't know. At least I got it out of my mind.

>>1
Hey i know you're clearly trying not to look like you're blaming everything on your mom, but truthfully, accept it, you are

Well, important things like whether your mom is trying or not or simply things like to check on your father's obsession might be a good way to help yourself
It is quite understandable that you feel tired and frustrated or probably irritated that your mom does not seem to care, but all these emotions are simply normal

Take one step a time , i advice that you try sending her through a rehab, eventhough it sounds harsh

No matter how much you think you tried for your mom, your mom would not understand not because she doesnt see your effort but she feels like it is impossible to

Persuade your sister to stop escaping , support your sister whenever she needs you

If you feel worried, confide with someone whom is close to you
or trash it all out , rant and rage through words

Feel free to express how you feel on Dollars
but take note of the rules here

Please ask your family members to take care, dont resolve to something silly =]

I wish Good Luck

To start, your mom must have a reason to be drinking this much. If you think you know what has caused this, you should try talking to her about it. To get her to stop, you could try hiding all the alcohol she has and her wallet (so she can't buy more) and when she is completely sober, try talking to her about her drinking problems. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery. If you can't get her to stop, you could try group counseling, or private counseling. (Whatever works best!) well, I hope this helps and you can solve your moms drinking problem! Good luck!

>>1 talk to your father about getting her into rehab like >>2 said, and/or some counselling sessions as well, like what >>3 said. You can tell him to maybe slowly cut her pocket money and the ability to withdraw money, so that she has less and less alcohol that she can buy, but do it slow enough that it doesn't impact her too much.
I agree that you should really focus on your sister for the time being, offering her a place to stay with you is probably one of the nicest thing that a sibling could do, so that she knows that she'll at least have a place to stay. Call her and talk to her, give her your love and support.
I know that it may sound harsh but your parents are grown people and they are capable of handling their marriage, finances, etc., you can't worry about things that you can't control, you can only do so much before it starts taking a toll on you. Support them and your sister, focus on that, small steps at a time.
And about the finances, you could work a summer job and save some money, just in case, it should help your parents as well, just a suggestion. I hope that that helps, good luck ^.^