I know how important, and life changing Confidence can be. But i just can't stand up and take charge; I want to be a leader, I want to show people what I, and They, can be. But, I just don't know why I feel empty and the second an event that I can take charge happens, I hesitate and chicken out. I play Jazz trumpet at school and I hesitate playing any of the solo's and I just screw it all up. Any thing you can suggest on how I can Over come my hesitation, and nervousness? Would really help.

You probably are worried about what others might think about you. Such thoughts can hold you back. If you do think like that, stop. Because no body will think anything bad about you. When they see your leadership, they'll co-operate with you themselves.

Don't doubt yourself, because you are what matters. Their opinions are irrelevant unless you ask for them or want constructive criticism.
However, you also need to learn to accept their negativity and not be scared of it. People aren't always going to agree with you, and you need to deal with it.
Remember that your opinion is what's important, and people who want to get all negative can just go suck a dick. Get up there and play that trumpet, because I'm sure you'll be amazing.
(If you find the anxiety is getting serious and persistent, go speak to a doctor or therapist. Just in case.)

Thanks, that will all be very useful. Very good advice, it's a bit harder to just fall back on it though. But i will give a leap of faith and if it works, I'll reply one here Later this week, Thank again >>2 >>3 .

Look in the mirror every day before you leave your house and tell yourself who you want to be that day and tell yourself you are gonna be that person. Be someone you would want to be friends with.

First day,your advice helped dramatically. Sometimes slip but it is really helping when I remember to.

This may be a bit late, but oh well. I too used to have a similar problem, and it took a while to gain confidence.

Think of people's confidence level in a fashion of level 1, level 2 etc. A more confident the person is, the higher his level. To level up, you need to muster some courage and do something that you would normally be afraid of doing. Repeating this process, you will eventually "level-up" and gain more confidence! It sounds kind of weird but it worked for me!

Good luck.

-Dantalion

>>1
I have similar Issues with confidence.
You have my attention.

Second day, my playing in band, and my attitude during our test to day were drastically different and better.

remember to smile and relax when you move and talk. just be smooth, hard to really say otherwise. you got to kind of know how people are likely to react to you and act in a way that gives you an air of charisma. don't lie or deceive, its not that you have to be someone totally different then yourself. again, ya just got to relax and be casual

don't feel forced to lead. Western society teaches us that we have to be leaders to succeed in life, but that's simply not true. Type B personalities (passive) are just as important as important in the structure of human society as type A personalities (assertive). Generals cannot succeed without a competent Corperal, so if solos aren't working try a duet, or ensamble

Think of it like ur the best. Ur #1. Enjoy it,have fun,smile and think about good stuff. Just have the mindset "im good" and you shouldnt hesitate anymore.

bump

I am playing my Jazz Trumpet Solo tonight at a concert tonight, I'll take account all of your advice, I'll tell you how I do tomorrow. Thanks again, for all your advice.