-My second langage is English so it may be bad sorry-

For 5 years I loved a guy, I'll call him UZ now.

But last year he said ''Gross. Just give up on me!'' And I cried alot and was depressed because of that. I gave up on him but seeing him made me depressed. But a few years ago I overcame that problem.

But the problem is he likes me now and I have a boyfriend. When I go on a date with my bf, UZ comes and tries to flirt with me.

Not only me but my bf even my mothr hates tat guy. I really want to kill him but to be honest deep in my heart I still like him.

What am I supposed todo?!

Ignore him (usually ineffective).
Tell him to fuck off(often ineffective).
Get the police involved(only effective if stalking or threats are involved).
Have your boyfriend threaten him(usually effective).
Give him the middle finger every time you see him(usually effective).
Spread rumors about how creepy he is (moderately effective, will make getting a new girlfriend from your group of connections difficult).

^ There are plenty of other options, too.

On a more opinionated note: If you have a boyfriend, you either need to give up on your crush on that guy now or dump your boyfriend. I personally think should not be dating somebody when you haven't gotten over your past crush, especially if you're letting it interfere with your relationship now and second guessing your decisions.

It was his loss when he hurt you, now your moving on.If anything tell him off because he had his chance, and now that your happy with someone else he decides to start loving you!?He's an idiot.

>>2
Thanks for the advice but i have gotten over it even my bf helped me when I cried on those days he is a really good and great person.
But when Uz first asked me I was somewhat happy but i wanted to punch him because i think the same as >>3
My boyfriend says that he can threaten him but i am scared of what he might do, he used to be a delinquent...
I will try the advices you gave me, thanks!

the meathod im going to say is simple and potentially a large time cost with a medium success rate but it is the least harming and you can gain friends. when Uz goes along with you go to a place with a lot of people that are in your age group but that you dont know. proceed to meet random people and then Uz will be inclined to as well after a few succesions of this he will meet different people that he is more comfortable with and then if he asks you again it will be easy for him to accept that you dont like him or he will find someone that he likes more and then leave you alone

Take a deep breath, relax and try to figure out which is best for you. Don't forget that the ex might hurt you again. Your actual bf might not.

But here, you are playing with your actual bf's feelings.
About your ex: I'd say to not be a fucking second choice. You deserve so much better. He will hurt again and again. And don't worry. You don't love him. It is just that you got used to think of him all the time and be in his presence. But you love your actual boyfriend.

Your ex is just trying to make you weak. To show you that you are despicable. But you are not. You are awesome and you love your bf. Your mom like your bf too.

Someone said that there are moments in your life when people will try to make you weak. Try to make you feel bad. Even if is their fault. But then you have to stand up to YOUR beliefs. Fight. Fight for what you think is good.

You can tell to your bf that you don't like your ex, but it is just that you got used to UZ. And ask for his help. And by help I don't mean to beat UZ, lol, but I mean that he can give you moral support. Words can bring you up. That's what you need right now.

My advice is not to accept your ex. And ask your bf to leave UZ alone because you don't want your bf to end up in jail or whatever because he beat UZ. Just ignore UZ and he will go his way and leave you alone.

Thanks for your advice,
>>6 I think you are right I dont love him anymore, i love my current boyfriend.
Its just that I cant forget Uz, whom I loved for 5 years.

Do not worry my current bf isnt a person who can beat that guy, he is way too kind and sometimes his kindness creep me out, lol.

Yesterday I talked with Uz (we are in the same club and our club met yesteday)
I asked him to stop doing things I hate, and he said
"I know that you dont hate me, but love me. Just break up with that ****, and be my girlfriend!"

I got really mad at him and punched him, making his lips bleed.
*My brother thoguht me self defence in an extreme level! Lol

Atnight he messaged me
"I give up, okay? And I am really sorry for making you suffer because of me. I regret what I said before. I said Gross but it wasnt because i hated you I was just surprised! Just think, what would you do if a guy you saw as a friend said I love you? You wouldnt be able to see him as a friend and thats the reason. I was scared of relationships since middle school. I know we are already in our second year in highschool and i know that it is childish for me to write this. I regret everything. I knew you were really depressed and whenever you saw me you cried. I am sorry, just... Cant you give me a chance?"

I didnt reply him and now I am more congused! Please help me, I need advice!
My boyfriend says
"Even if we break up, i will still be your best friend. What matters to me is your happiness. And if that guy hurts you dont forget that this handsome guy here will lend you his shoulder!
And also i will never be mad at you, okay? You are free but if you choose me over that 'thing' i would be very very happy."

See the difference? My boyfriend is wayy too kind and sometimes it is creepy!

I can be confused but I am sure of this;

A boyfriend isnt for kissing and saying I love you. A boyfriend has to stay by my side and must cheer me up when I am down, and he must be like a best friend.
If I choose Uz, I wont find happiness. i feel sorry for him and i know how he feels but I have my current boyfriend now. That is my answer, and i wont regret it.
Thanks a lot everyone,
Thanks Dollars.

>>7 bwhahaha punched him?! Omg I love you!! You are my hero!
Don't give him a chance.
See? I was right :D After 5 years, you just got used to him. But you love your boyfriend ^^
Glad your brother teached you self defence. He is awesome!!!

well that just made my day even better i laughed when i read this

>>7 Go Arya for the punch. And as for advice, i wouldn't give the guy another chance, stick with this guy, because he's a real sweet heart, and that's what it seems you deserve to have :). Also, the kindness may seem a little off putting, but from the sound of it, his feelings really are genuine, and he does really seem to want you to be happy, so in my opinion, that's a rare thing to find in people, guys especially ( yes i know, i'm a guy lol). So follow what you feel is right, and what will make you happy, that's my advice. Anyways, hope the best for you ^.^

Can "Gross. Just give up on me." be a maymay?

Anyways, second chances are for recovering drug addicts, not people who told you to give up on you.
Stay where you are. Uz seems like he would get in your pants and then ditch out again.

TELL HIM THIS (WITHOUT THE CAPS): "IM SORRY, I LOVE MY CURRENT BOYFREIND AND IM NOT GOING TO LEAVE HIM FOR YOU. EVEN IF WHAT YOU SAID WAS AN ACCIDENT. MAYBE TRY FOR SOME ONE ELSE?"

THEN ATTEMPT TO HOOK HIM UP WITH SOMEONE. TRY IT AND TELL US IF IT WORKS OR NOT.

GOOD LUCK.

GET OVER IT

well if deep down in your heart you still like him then maybe setting him up with another person isnt such a good idea (no offense to Upsilon) this might not be true but some people that see a person that use to like them but then get over them they get jealous that they arnt a star now and they try to get that person back so they can feel good about themselves again even if they dont even like the person. maybe he's doing it for his ego

>>13 no. Shut up. That's not advice and no excuse to bump an old thread.
Do you even know who that woman is? Yeah I didn't think so, she's a pretty empowering woman.

>>15 dont feed the troll!!! everything will be better if u ignore it then it will go away at some point...

>>15 you really should pay better attention to the other threads.