Today,I did something I'm about to regret for the rest of my life.I told a girl I don't trust(let's call her Sierra) that I cut.Sierra is the LAST person that I'd talk about my insecurities,bad habits and fears with...It's because we always fight.We're completely different in every aspect.I'm more mature than her in reality,however most of the time,I act like a 5-year-old just to get on her nerves.Just like how she gets on mine,after all...Our friends think we don't hate each other as much as we think though and that,deep deep down,we're actually really close...Now,I never understood that.How can a person I don't get along with at all be close to me!?I strongly dislike her character,but in reality,I know I'd never hurt her,mostly because I'm a coward and secondly because I know I'd get my ass kicked after that...HARD...
Anyway,later the same night,I texted her in fb and that's what I said;
"Finally...if you say that to any of our friends,I'm never going to tell you a secret again and I don't think I'll ever talk to you again..."
That's what she answered;
" -.- For the last time...I WON'T EVEN MENTION IT!!"
"Hey,calm down!!I'm in a difficult situation here!I wasn't planning on telling this to any of my friends.It just slipped out when I was talking to you and all..."
"I'd seen your scars before,anyway..."
"But still...Can u please forget what I told you??Like it never happened??"
"-.- Neoma...(let's say that's my name)Why don't you trust me,goddamit???x|"
"...Why don't YOU trust ME?"
"In what?"
"I dunno...In anything serious."
"I HAVEN'T TOLD YOU ANYTHING SERIOUS BECAUSE NOTHING SERIOUS HAS HAPPENED!!You ARE one of my best friends!"
"Sierra...I'm really glad you think of me as one of your bfs,but...If you don't feel like telling me a secret,nobody will MAKE you do it!!I'm just trying to make you understand...That just like u feel uncomfortable talking about some stuff,so do I
And btw I'll try to trust you..."
"It's not like someone made me tell you!!It's because you are my friend and FRIENDS are together in sorrow and happiness!!!"
I.DON'T.KNOW.WHAT.TO.DO. I swear I haven't slept in days because of that...What if she says it and the entire school find out?

>>1 If you want your problems to be taken more seriously, you probably shouldn't post a picture like that one.

My friend i understand your fears, but perhaps your friends are right, maybe you guys are closer than either of you realize. I think your over thinking these things and just need to have faith in her. just give it a little while and have faith, I'm sure she'll surprise you. Feel free to ask me any questions, i don't know everything, but I've been in a few of these situations myself and I'd be glad to help you in any way i can.

>>1 Just take her word for it that shes not gonna tell anyone. You seem to annoy her by constantly telling her to not tell anyone. Just drop the whole situation and eventually you'll forget about it. And it really doesnt seem like you dislike her. You seem willing to talk to her.