*I recommend that all names are changed to remain anonymous*

So yeah. Its exactly what it says. Got a f*cked up, twisted, messed up story to tell?

Well, I might as well tell mine.

I'm 16 (on the verge of 17), and have D.I.D. (which stands for) Dissociative Identity Disorder. In short, Its a disorder of the brain when someone (due to some kind of trauma) creates (an) alternative personality(ies). Possibly to overcome something that the 'host' (me) or 'original' person could not handle on their own.

As for me. . . I have a few. I also refer to them as my family. Or. . . 'inner' family.

1) There's me of course,
2) Zeeko; My 25 year old, boarder line Playboy type older brother if you will,
3) Lucas Imako; He's 11 years old, quiet, and rather shy.
4)Geeko; He reminds me of my younger self around 10. Very funny, active, super childish, and always excited like a little kid trying to fall asleep on Christmas night.
5) Lucy; She's 24 and is bisexual. Which means I really have to be careful with her around my guy friends.
6) Then there's the most infamous reindeer of all; Orange; Hes the psychotic one who has a 'deep' love for Razors and scissors. He is like a Slender-Man with an Orange for a head, purple suit, white gloves, and a blue tie.

(In my head I can use like a 'Telepathy' if you will to communicate with them at will. And when I sleep sometimes I can see what they look like too. And Orange is f*cking scary looking as hell.)

Now living with them in me is very difficult, but I get by. The only people who know that I have this are My Girlfriend, iONS (a childhood friend), and Wednesday (a 21 year old waitress at my job).

Now here's where it REALLY starts to get twisted.

My Girlfriend (Who I have decided to name 'Celty' on here)has D.I.D too.

1) There's her. 17, Sweet, Kind, and very independent.
2) Layla; a 4 Year old who is really affectionate, but because of her experiences in high school, she is A LOT smarter than the average 4 year old.
3) Sarah; She is the psycho in Celty. And thats all I know.
4) Jake; . . . he's a 19 year old boy in Celty.
. . . He and I don't exactly walk hand in hand. Jake and Celty were in a relationship a while before I showed up. But she broke it off because it's not logical, her feelings for him are gone, and he doesn't physically exist.

Now, in some cases of D.I.D. they have a 'house' in their head. And. . . well, they were dating each other inside of her head (the house) while Layla was in control of her physical body.

At first, Jake and I were content with each other. But eventually things just got out of hand and our fabricated friendship disappeared. . .

I mean, He f*cking lives inside of her mind. So he will NEVER go away.

Just a visual here. Imagine your ex living inside of you. Having to take turns controlling the host body, knowing that you will never escape them, and they will never have a life of their own, nor ever find love.

Zeeko is always getting in Jake's face and Jake is always getting in Zeeko's face. Why? Because Zeeko is trying to protect me from Jake (who hates me) and Jake is always trying to protect Celty from me (because he "Doesn't trust me" which I don't think is the whole reason there).

Well. . . This would make one hell of a novel huh? I could see the f*cking "Team Jake", "Team Zorli" posters overflowing in the back of Wal-Marts nationwide now.

So, Enough about me. You got a f*cked up story to tell?

Anything Extraordinary?

Comments about mine?

Add whatever you like~

And,

Does the number 226 mean anything special to you?

Tumblr: Mr-Zorli.tumblr.com

Wow, just wow. I'm sorry if I'm offending you in any way, but I have to say that I'm amazed. I only get into a debate with myself, like with issues of morality and other mundane topics, and I get annoyed sometimes with myself, but having these personalities inside you must be a big racket. It's both awesome and terrifying in a way. I hope you're doing good! And good luck to you and your girlfriend!

I love how you're all like"so, enough about me"

No. Not enough.

You need to be posting a weekly update on this.
I refused to post anything on this thread till you comply.

Wow. I really didn't expect to get a response, but i got four. ha ha.

>>2 Oh, no worries there. This is supposed to be entertaining for people. Thanks for the support as well.

>>3 Haha. That song seems interesting. I'll listen to it on my way to work in a bit~

>>4 A weekly update? I don't see why not~
I only told the basis for I wanted to let others say their stories. . . But I guess it can be both. People can post their f*cked up stories and I can Post updates on mine. Well, my life.

So sure. I'll keep this as an anonymous vlog (? Is that the right word?)

***Yeah. Expect them every week.***
I'll make it on Sunday. Around. . . well. . .
It will be posted on Sunday ^-^U

I might as well tell you all what happened even before all of this started.

I think my head started to twist around 11 years old.
Just after I started Death Note. I'm sure most of you are familiar with it?

I don't remember having D.I.D. back then. But I always had a HUGE imagination. Whenever I acted "Funny", was "Active" or "Childish" I called it my "GEEKO MODE". And whenever I felt like a "Bad boy" or like a "Huge pervert" (Even though I was so young) I called it my "ZEEKO MODE".

Scoff.

Can you believe that? Before I even knew about what D.I.D. was I thought I was two different people.

well. I think thats enough for today. I better get ready for work.

>>4 Here's something to keep you satisfied till Sunday.

Mr-Zorli Stands for:

ZORLI
ER*UM
EA*CA
KN*AK
OG*SO
E

*The "*" is to censor my name. So it starts with an "R" But doesn't necessarily have that many letters.

I'll keep you guys posted~

> >2 "it's both awesome and terrifying in a way"

I like that comment because it is true. If I was ever to get into a fight with some jackass at school, I could "tap out" and have Zeeko rip him to shreads. (Not literally though. If I wanted that, I could let out someone with a little more citrus in them play. ha . . .ha. . .)

But yeah. We're there for each other. Like there are a lot of things I can't handle on my own.

I was watching "The Grey" a few days ago and almost had a panic attack when the drowning scene came on. I'm TERRIFIED of drowning. And (not going to make myself sound manyly or tough so here it is) I actually started to shake and tear up a little bit. Then Zeeko took over and let me calm down. He's a good guy. Literally like a brother.

I wonder how my mom would respond if I randomly went up to her and said that she didn't just have me and my sister. That she gave birth to four boys, two girls, and an Orange headed slender man hahaha

(Kind of forgot I have a internet capable phone ha ha)

so has Orange ever came out while your at school?

>>4 I agree with Magnolia. Use this site to write about what's happening. Who knows, it might help you deal with other things that you find troublesome ^^

>>6 It's like you'll never have a reason to be lonely at all. There are times when just talking to myself helps me get through a day when no one would (it was during my college days). I also kept a diary to help me communicate with I felt, which made me forget how to communicate with people when it really mattered. I'm not saying that your D.I.D. is either good or bad, but I just hope that you're doing fine with talking with others. I mean, having 5-6 people talk and be with you at almost every time seems like a handful and a blessing too.

So, something off topic (or not that much)... how's work? ^^

>>7 I'm also quite curious, Ennis. But is it okay to talk about that, Mr. Zorli? ^^

Man, I don't know how you could get by Zorli, I want weekly updates too~ your situation seems pretty bad, and heres thinking I had it rough :( I thought it was bad enough with having one person to listen to you have like 5, 6 if you include your own conscience. I've split personality disorder, so I live with Me (Steffie) and Stephanie, I developed the disorder after the stuff I went through at home, Stephanie is basically all my negative emotions that I pushed aside from over the years, I look at her like a big sis, I'll tell ya one thing that seems nice about your disorder is that you've an extended family ^^; must be hard to get lonely huh?

Wow. Reading these responces really put a smile on my face~
*smiles*

>>7 No thank god. I forgot to mention the . . . 'Percent chance' that their out.

I am usually out most of the time.
Zeeko would have 2nd place in the scoreboards. Its like a 60/40 split with him and I.
And for the rest?

Geeko, Lucas, and Lucy BARELY spend any time out (which is very comforting. And stress relieving). They are only out and about every. . . Three months? I don't really know. They don't do much but I know that they're there.

As for Orange. He doesn't just 'pop up'. He has to be triggered. Like if I'm super pissed at something (most people just curse, punch a wall, scream. . .) I start laughing. Like cRazY pSyCHoPaTH laughing. Thank god no ones REALLY pissed me off in school or hit me before.

I don't want to be charged with a crime.

>>8 it really MAY indeed be a blessing. But also a curse when it comes to being in a serious relationship. I mean, THINK OF THE ODDS that me AND my girlfriend have this. Its by all means extraordinary, twisted, and unbelievable.

I wouldn't go a day withough my inner family but there are days where I think it may just be easier if neither of us had it.

I also mentioned that you usually need to have experianced some kind of trauma right?

That's what I'm missing. A traumatic event that could have caused this.

I know for a fact that Celty has had one of these. Something to do with her father (who is out of the picture now) and I have a few guesses in mind, but I won't think about them for I might make any clues I might find bias. She won't tell me either and I won't ask. For I might bring out sarah and orange might want a proper opponent.

I swear, I should write a book. Ha ha.

>>8 Work? It went well~ just got off. Thanks for asking. My moms side of the family owns a resturant and I got a job. Much easier than going to a stranger and appying for one. Ha.

I hadn't talked to Wednesday today. She was off.

>>9 ha ha. Lonely? What that mean? Ha ha. Yeah. But thank god they can't see everytthing I do. When we swap its like I blink my eyes and am somewhere else, with fragments of what they were doing.

Like if they drank a whole cup of water, I would just remember the last sip.

Stephaine kind of reminds me of Zeeko. Like he is usually really pissy, full of bottled up anger. But he's gotten better at being a people person.

I think Orange has taken most of the anger that Zeeko had. (Which is both good and bad. Mostly because it makes Orange that much stronger and fueled but also makes the 'me' that everyone sees, that much more friendly.)

Please keep us updated. To be honest, this is very interesting to me---multiple personalities.

>>12 WHAT. DO YOU THINK I'M HERE FOR YOU ENTERTAINM- *huge laughter*

I'm only joking.

I'll try to make this as entertaining as I can~

But my life has many plot twists in it so be prepared for what you read ha ha.

And I don't know about weekly updates. Should there be? Or should I just respond and update when I can?

Having them every Sunday would make things more orgamized right? Yeah. Okay. So enough of me untill Sunday.

I guess I'll just answer any last coments or anything until twelve and then leave it to Sundays.

Hope you guys enjoy my twisted stories to come! (And for what have already happened~ )

I laughed at this thread harder than I have ever laughed at any thread on the BBS before.

Please stick around, you're better than Azazel.

>>10 So you mean you don't HAVE a traumatic event that might have caused this? Maybe you just can't remember it or something?

I think it's kind of easier for both you and your girlfriend if both of you have DID. I mean, it's not good health-wise, but good emotionally-wise (?? I'm not sure if that's the right word) since you two know what the other must be going through when either 'phase' out or snap into someone other than yourselves, so at least not one of you is sitting there and taking all the consequences of the switching. I hope that you two are doing well in your relationship ^^

Oh! That is easier; working at your mom's. Do they (the staff) know about your DID? And have there been instances when you've switched?

>>14 Chrome, seriously, you're now one of my favorite people here on the BBS hahaha So what happened with this Azazel? I've only been here since yesterday, but the name seems familiar. I've read some threads, and I think I've seen it somewhere...

Yesssss!! Weekly updates!

Looking forward to tomorrow so much! XD

I'm pretty glad everyone else is supporting this. I just find it all pretty amazing. And I mean, what would happen if someone else starts typing and not really.. *you*. I'm gonna be honest here, I don't see this idea much as "entertainment" as I do an "opportunity". I'm a seeker of knowledge at heart, and I just want to know all I can on everything and anything. I don't know anyone else like you, so your findings are what I can store in my memory for future psychological analyses of other people.

Weekly updates would definitely be more organized. I think when you post, putting something like the date of the post in bold will make it easier to find. (Just a suggestion though)

>>8 I never thought of that.. keeping posts on here probably could help you in the long run too. At least, I hope it does, but I mean. Do you even need help? Sounds like everything is kind of...unavoidable.

>>16 I guess we'll just know if Zorli's not the one who's typing... But that will be an amazing encounter if that happens haha And I agree, it's not much of entertainment for me too, but a way to know more about DID.

Yeah, it seems unavoidable, but like Zorli's Mr. Orange who needs a 'trigger' to come out, maybe we can help in preventing unwanted emotions or reactions or to just like help in calming down when need be. Writing's a good outlet, right? :D

So are you in constant "telepathy" with them like they can speak to you whenever or do you need to make a conscious effort to hear them? I guess what I'm asking is is there constantly a "speaking" voice other than your own or are they silent if you don't want to hear them?

>>17 ahh.. good idea. Maybe we can prevent orange... I can't help but replacing him with a lemon. And then he screams "UN-AC-CEPT-ABLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE!!!!!!!!!"

>>19 Lemon!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA That'll be hilarious! But, according to Zorli's posts, Orange may not just say that... It's kind of scary what ELSE might happen if we piss the guy of tangerine origins ^^

Holy shit man. I got fans. Lol

Whazup peeps.

Its me. The faggot 'Zeeko' mentioned all the way up there haha.

No joke. Well I see my boy told you guys quite a bit of our personal life huh?

>>19>>20 I don't reall y get that reference if you're making one. Sounds funny as hell though. Lolz

well then. I don't think anything here was meant for me to answer so guess you'll wait till um.. 'zorli' comes back LOL. Omg. "ZORLI". I can't believe he's usuing that name here hahahahaha.

And what's this commotion I'm hearing about this Chrome kid?

I've seen his name mentioned in several bbs posts with the word "faggot" not to far away from it.

Is he /are you a regular?


(I won't guarantee I will be around long enough to read the answer though. Zorli will be back tomorrow to update you on whatever it is he feels the need to share lol)

I didn't know I was signed up for a reality blog but oh well. I'm not complaining with a little internet fame haha.

-Z

Should have changed my fucking name though. OBVIOUSLY, I do not hold the greater part of his comon sence lol

>>21>>22 Hello, Mr. Zeeko haha Nice of you to join us! Actually, no reference there with Orange (I think), it just sounded funny haha

Chrome? I think he/she's a regular? Not too sure since I've been here for only 2 days.. But I think I've seen some posts that had a fight within some regulars (with Chrome) and this Azazel kid. Dunno the details though haha

Hey, hope to talk to you again, Zeeko. How about telling the story from your perspective? That'd be cool haha

And how did you change? Something happened? Or is this just a regular occurrence?

when i was in elementary school i was....umm... how should i put this...i was being beaten at home by my mother and step father..... but but it stopped when i got it middle school and evry time i writ some thing i write what i wanted to see in my life...hehehe ^-^

>>24 That's a healthy way to somehow escape your troubles, great job! And it's good too that you focus on your future rather than moping about your past and present difficulties ^^

>>23 I guess I'll tell him to come back on and answer that question for you.

Ugh. I'm really pissed off right now.
Like, I don't usually get mad. I think its more of a sadness anger than straight up pissed.

Me and my girlfriend haven't talked almost all of winter break. We got into an "implyed" argument where we both knew we were both upset but didn't know why.

I guess I got upset because she was upset with me and I didn't know why she was. (If that makes any sence. . .)

The last thing I texted her after that "moment of us both being upset" was if she wanted to come over and meet my family on christmas eve but she said that she couldn't.

"but thank you though :)". Was the last thing she wrote so I got happy that she wasn't upset with me.

I hadn't gotten a text from her since though, and she hasn't answered any that her phones got, or her ipod, or on facebook.

Hopefully she's not ignoring me.

and even more so, hopefully "someone" isn't messing with my head and heart.

>>26 Oh, I see... That's too bad that she can't go there for Christmas, but at least she's not upset with you right? Just talk to her about that implied argument of yours, and hope it'll make you feel better ^^

Maybe a little distance wouldn't be bad, but be sure to talk about that implied argument and put it a closure on it :)

>>24 sorry, I didn't refresh, so don't think I was ignoring you.

Well. I don't really know what to say rather than that must have been horrible for you to grow up in. I'm glad to hear that it stopped once you got into middle school. Abuse like that is what causes a decent percentage of people with D.I.D. I hope that you are completely free of that sort of treatment.

>>25 I also agree. That is a great way to momentarily escape situations you don't want to be in. I'm starting to do the same thing. But on here I guess.

>>24 I hope that you have happiness in your life now. Away from all that. I hate hearing about people in those situations. Most likely because I always want to help, but in some situations I can't. Best of luck in your future musiclover! *huge smile*

>>27 thanks. The next time we get a chance to talk, weather by text or in person (prefered) I'll be sure to be like "I know we were mad at each other for whatever reason . . . " and go on from there to make it better.

Its a good idea. Thank you *happy comforted smile*

>>29 Welcome!! All we ever need for good relationships is communication anyway.. Good luck with Celty! :)

Well . . . its technically Sunday sooo . . . haha

I guess what I put up there could be used as part of the update right?

Um. Let's start with what I didn't answer. . . Oh. And when you read this, you moron, calm down. Its not like everyones wanting your autograph Z. Haha.

And for any of you wondering, he might remember me writing that and might not. Like I said. "Last sip".


>>15 no. No one at my job know about me except Wednesday. She's taking psych classes in collage for the third year now, so I figured she would be the best person I knew to tell.

When I was telling her about celty or "this person I know . . . " who has D.I.D. I was really careful not to slip and give it away who I was talking about by saying "they" and "they're".

Then she comes out and says:

Wednesday : you know who you're talking about right Zorli?
Zorli (me): what? *scoff laugh* alright then. Who? *raised eyebrow*
Wednesday: its your girlfriend Zorli.
Zorli: . . .
Wednesday: by you saying "they" and "theyre" you're disclosing their gender. Now if that was true, why wouldn't you just say "this guy"? So since now that I know it is a girl, "who would be close enough to tell you this that is a girl?". And there you have it.

She is one of the smartest people I know. So yeah. After that she immediatly earned my trust.

As for me not having / remembering having a traumatic event. I might just not be able to remember it. Like I really can't remember anything super specific about my childhood to be honest. I also don't think I'm the original owner of this body when I really think of it. But I may never know.

Remember how I said I though I had a Geeko and Zeeko mode? How I thought I was. Two different people? Well. There's a geeko inside of me that is almost never out anymore. And we all know Zeeko haha. So where do I fit in? Did GEEKO actually experiance something so bad he couldn't take it and gave up? Am I what took over the host? My mind is so weird. Like I only have fragments of my childhood. Just like the others get when they swap in. . .

. . .

>>16 so you're a person seeking intelligence rather than entertainment. I respect that. And if you ever have any questions for personal knowlage just type something up~

>>17 yeah. Being on here calms me down a lot. Thank you all who are being so kind and interested towars this. Orange lost it last night though. Not too bad though. He's done worse. He scraped my hand up on a cement wall but I prefer that to the other method of pain he likes putting me through. My mom almost flipped when whe saw the gash in my left hand. But I didn't expect her to believe that "I slipped when cutting bread for my breakfast" to work so easily haha.

>>18 this is a great question. No. They're not always there in my head. I sometimes hear them if they want to throw a coment into my situation. Like if someone tells a joke, and somehow they hear it while in my head, they'll make a coment. Or when they want a turn to control the body I'll just get "that feeling" that I need to close my eyes. And when I open them I have new memories and am in a different room.

Or house. Or block. Or car. Or school. Or just a differnt chair.

Lucas got lost once in school and I ended up getting a cut for guess what? Art. Haha. Who cuts art? Haha.

I can't talk to them all the time. Like I can't never talk to orange or Zoey or lucas or geeko. They can, but rarely talk to me. Orange's voice is terrifying ha. . .ha. . .

(And because I was watching the lion, the witch and the wardrobe while writing the very first post omg. I meant Zoey. For the 24 year old bisexual? Yeah. Her name is Zoey. Not Lucy. Haha)

Alright. More update time. So work today was fun. I'm a busboy so I clean a lot right? So Zoey pops up for a little while and my moms telling her to clean this, that, and the other thing. She's hates germs and cleaniing (which must have been heaven for her to have to clean tables with food all over them hahaha).

She didn't last long. Zeeko couldn't take her b*tching so he took over.

Then Zeeko and Wednesday ate together on break. Zoey gave Wednesday a message from Zoey saying

Zeeko: oh, zoey was here you know.
Wednesday: DAMNIT really? I wanted to meet her. Darn...
Zeeko: well, *nom* she said that you were hot and she threatened to grope you.
Wednesday: OMG. HAHA. Next week is going to be fun. HAHAHA
Zeeko: yeah. Just um.. no hard feeling alright? XD

So yeah. Atleast she's okay and know that it won't be me *embarassed face on desk*

iONS said that I really have D.I.D. or I'm the smartest lier on earth haha.

I'm on my way home from work now. I guess I'll update all of Sunday too. Then leave mom-sat in the dark and come back after.

I'll tell you guys more about iONS when I wake up tomorrow. Hope you liked this update~

Yeah. . .

*awkward expression*

Let's correct some things.
Up there in the last text by me, right where you felt confused, about 6 mini paragraphs up, I meant "Zeeko gave Wednesday a message from Zoey saying-"

And at the end I meant "mon-sat".
If you didn't spot that out yourself~

Has anyone ever fought over who gets to be in control?

Like, it's Zeeko for one second, then Zoey,

Then Zeeko again and he yells "Damnit Zoey! You can you your turn later!"

Then Zoey takes over and yells back "But I wanna go somewhere!"

And then Zeeko "Shut up! I'm gonna go do-!" and whatever, but yeah!
SO ANYWAYS!
Have they ever fought for who's in control? That'd be funneh xD

....this..is so...damn...cool.

>>31 I like how you're really doing all you can to write on this blog-like thread of ours haha Oh no, Orange did that? I hope you're all right now. Has he done any other things? Graver things?

That's a real problem: not remembering much about your childhood or about any incident that could have led to this. At the same time, I have to say that I'm amazed to hear it first hand (actually, read it first hand) about the confusing ways of the mind. Is this really who I am? Am I who I always thought I was? Am I just another personality? If so, does that mean that I have a stronger sense of self compared to the other personalities? But it seems that your family (outer one) doesn't look at you strangely because you know and remember that your name is *insert true name here* then maybe this is who you really are. Does that make sense or was it a little confusing too? @.@

On a side note, can I ask about your family? Just a brief summary, like how many siblings you have, or any particular thing that you want to share to us about them. ^^

I like this Wednesday person from your work; it looks like she's doing well with her Psych major haha good luck to her! It's good that you have someone external to talk to about these things. It really helps, more than writing about it or talking to people through the internet haha It's cool too that she likes to know your personas better. Whether it's for knowledge or just plain curiosity, it's great that she's paying attention than ignoring you, right?

>>32 That second to the last statement was really ominous... I was confused too, and then when I read your next comment, I was like O.O

>>33 Yeah, I'd like to ask about that too. has there ever been an instance where they've fought for control? If there was, what happened or what were the things you remembered happening? Haha

>>34 Yes, Magnolia, I felt the same as I read through Zorli's update hahaha this is just too cool to experience and talk about.

I'm slightly confused...

I thought Orange was the "protector". So why is He hurting You?
The reference was a character called Lemon Grab on Adventure Time- AND OMGEE ZEEKO'S SO COOL!!! XD(lmao he has FANS. That's just ridiculous)

Umm... what if your other personalities wanna date someone other than Celty? How would Celty feel on that? Is that considered "cheating"?

Last question! So if ur not the host, and the actual host (geeko?) is dormant or even no longer exists, do you not take medication or therapy because yourself and the others might disappear? And if you did that, no telling if any of you might come back...
Orange might be a bit peeved about this idea too...

So have you ever tried a telepathic... "conference" i guess is the best word, you know getting all your identities to talk with you and maybe you can piece together any broken memories or something, If they are unwilling maybe Zeeko can help, he seems to have a command personality and also seems willing to help you out most of the time, or if this isn't possible maybe a self recording of them all with a video camera or something? I don't know its just an idea.

oh and >>36 it seems to me that Zeeko is really more of the protector and Orange is where all the negative emotions wind up but maybe he'll clarify that for us.

>>33 haha. I doesn't exactly happen like that. But yeah, sometimes we bicker over who gets to walk around. heh. There's more or less of a feeling to "Let yourself go, and close your eyes" when it's time to switch. I get like a vision of them in my head and if I decide they can come on out, I let them.

It also depends on the situation for how long I can keep them bottled up.

If I'm in a situation where I'm getting really pissed off, Zeeko might be able to force me out. Wear as if I'm with Kayla, I will immediately be able to force Him out.

>>34 To some yes. this is very cool. Funny story actually. My whole life I wanted something extraordinary. And I got exactly what I wished for and more. But then again, maybe I would have been better off normal. Too late to turn back now. Guess I'll just have to keep evolving~ heh heh. . .

>>35 I like it though. It relieves a lot of stress. Plus It seems maybe my knowledge could be of use to others. Best primary source around haha.

Orange has only hurt me twice . . . so far at least. I know there will be future accidents. The first time was with a scissor on my left hand. left quite the impression on my mom. It didnt leave too bad of a scar. barely noticeable, but hurt like hell every time I moved it. This time it's the right hand. Zeeko told me it was during work, and he went outside to scrape it against the wall. fun fun fun~

"I am? Am I who I always thought I was? Am I just another personality?"
Haha, ever played 358/2 Days~?

And yeah, I get what you're trying to say. But who knows.

As for my family, I have a Sister who on this site I will call . . . Sayu, and a mom & dad.

Sayu is a huge 1D fan, and is 15. Her and I get along quite well. She hasn't been around any members of my inner family really. they usually mind their own business unless forced to make contact.

My mom is sweet and kind. but way too influenced by my father.

My dad. . . I love him to death but, he's just too religious to take seriously. And the biggest walking contradiction I've ever laid my eyes upon.

*Real situation*

Me: DAD. We're going to be late! Hurry!
Dad; Well, maybe it's meant for us to be late. Maybe if we left on time a car would have hit us and God intervened~

(Another time~~~)

Dad: LETS. GO. WE. ARE. GOING. TO. BE. LATE.
N.O.W.
Me: Well, maybe it wa-
Dad: GIVE ME YOUR PHONE. SHUT IT AND LETS GO. NO COMPUTER FOR A WEEK.

. . .

See what I mean? He really is trying his best, but sometimes he can be really uptight. His dad left him when he was just 7 years old, and the last thing he said to him when he left was "grow up". So yeah. I could expect him to have had it rough.

He's been married twice before my mom.

Wife #1 Said she wanted to get divorced but still go out. (That must have hurt. . .)
Wife #2 Tried to kill him. Got him thrown in jail for a week for forging evidence, sold all of his stuff several times, and would wait at home for him with a butcher knife. . .
Wife #3 Is my mom who hopefully will stay sane.

Wednesday's amazing. I will owe her a lot. Plus she jumped at the chance to get a first hand talk with someone with D.I.D. (even being a person she's know for a few years.)

>>36 Oh, I know who you're talking about haha.

. . .

Well, you got me. If say Zeeko ever wanted to date anyone he couldn't. EVER. And he couldn't date Celty because she's mine~ If Layla wanted to date anyone SHE couldn't and she couldn't date me because I'm with Celty.

So while Celty and I were away, Zeeko and Layla decided to tie the knot.

So if you think about in a twisted way like Wednesday said,

"So let me get this straight. You're TECHNICALLY in a polygamy with Celty, her Ex, and a 4 year old, making you both straight and gay, possibly bi, a playboy pedophile with an Orange head. Did I miss anything?"

What was the name of this thread again? F*cked up Story what? Haha.

. . .

Here we go opening up another topic door.
"What if there was a way to get rid of a personality?"

There is actually a therapy that you can look into that helps "Combine" all the disconnected pieces of yourself. I guess that how you would "Get rid of them".

Think about this:

Some people with this have a "House" like Celty does.


Now ask yourself. . . "Can you kill a personality in the house?"

Like could you strangle them? Stab them? ACTUALLY KILL THEM? If so, would they go away? Would they take part of YOU with them when they "died"?

This is something I have been wanting to ask Celty for the longest time but have refused myself to do it over and over again. I could never ask her that because It's obvious to what I am implying.

I'll assume you all get what I'm talking about here?

>>37 I've never tried to talk to more than one at any given time. Plus the only personalities that are 100% chance of seeing in a single day are myself and Zeeko. The rest I can barely talk to, once in a month. Less alone get them all together. I don't think I'd be able to do that.

And yeah. Zeeko's my protector. Orange is just an @$$hole filled with anger and hate.

Zorli What helps you cope? I know sometimes you wouldent mind it but naturally you wouldent get sick of it every now and again wouldent you? how do you cope?

>>39 how do I cope. . .

I guess I cope by thinking of this as a good thing. It's my secret weapon that I can use to my advantage. Even though it's all very weird, I picture myself and Celty in the future, us happy together.

And the only way for that to happen is to look at this as a good thing and just roll with it.

It's very odd though.

D.I.D.

Thats a very positive outlook, Its good. You can do what most people cant

Bump

bump~
your stories are really interesting! can't wait to hear more. =)

Your right that is pretty screwed up... Somehow it is pretty interesting to read though.

>>1 What did you mean by
"Does the number 226 mean anything special to you?"

>>44 oh they get better my friend lol.

>>45 that damn number has been haunting me for as long as I can remember. I feel like it really means something. I don't mean to sound crazy. But that number (I feel) is going to mean a whole lot to a lot of people soon. I really don't know.

Everytime I see that cursed number, something bad always happens.

Here are a few encounters.

1) I was being driven to work. I looked at the time, "02:26". I witness a head on collision several yards infront of me.
2) Again, riding in a car. I tnotice a bus infront of us. Serial numer? 00226. Two seconds later my uncle calls saying my grandma stopped breathing and had to be taken to the hospital.
3) I went bowling with Celty, Cracker, and Zelda (fake names.). After we finnished I looked at the total score of all players. 226. Celty turns into Jake, he's all pissy, so I ignore him, Celty comes back, she thinks I'm ignoring HER, gets really sad, we all end up leaving with a sour taste in our mouths.

Oh, how I can go on.

This is actually starting to entertain ME. Haha. And a great and fun way to relieve stress I guess~ (I think I'm starting to see what Zeeko meant about having "fans" before lol)

But weather you're here, for entertainment, a good laugh, or just because you can't get enough of knowlage, I hope you'll stick around for more~

And does anyone think I should write a book about this? My whole life? I mean, picture this.

You're reading my book . . . Say I'll write three. And you're on the third book about to finnish it. And on the back of the back cover, there's. An envelope attached and sealed to the book. And on it it says "open when you're done with the series."

And inside the envelope is a card that reads:

"Based on a true story."

And leave them guessing who the story is about.

I think that would be so cool . . .

>>49 I would totally buy that book.

Think I got a great Idea for the # even if it doesn't make complete sense. I thought after looking at your story I think it could stand for

Two lovers (You and your girlfriend.)

Two enemies (Zeeko and Jake)

and your Six personalities
(If you put it together it even rhymes)
(It could also make a great title for the book if you ever write it.) However that is all I could come up with... Anyways I will look forward to your next update.

so i paid a visit to your tumblr link and I'll be honest when i saw the oranges everywhere it kinda freaked me, I blame you for giving me a paranoia of oranges, lol

This is so awesome, my mind is simply full of questions, but i guess that i for now, just will stick around.

But i seems that your other personalities remember, what you do/have done, because i don't see how Zeeko would know the password for this website any other way.

Are you by any chance Canadian?(You don't need to answer that)

>>53
1. U don't have to use the password to enter in here everytime if youve used it wihin the past 24 hours.
And 2. Shit like that is filed into memory since zorli comes on so often. I don't think zeeko needs to "ask".

I'm in a really bit hole right now so I'm not going to make a super organized scedual.

Well did I mention that Celty and I hadn't talked in a while? Well we barely walked all holiday break, and the first day we get back we both kind of realize how star-crossed we are.

She can't make Jake and Layla happy with Zeeko and Jake bickering all the time. Jake still loves her and is there for her when I can't be.

Celty and I both had I guess a mutual break up today and I don't even know what to do anymore. She said that if there is a way that we could still stay together AND have everyone happy, she would love to hear it because she just doesn't know how to fix it. She wants to . . . We both do.

But who could I ask for help with something like this?

Its not your everyday teen Drama you know.

I mean, there is still a way to save our love because I will never stop fighting. I just need time to figure it all out. Suggestions welcome~ thank you.

>>50 Blockbust. . . You're the icing on the cake.

I NEVER thought about it that way, and I think that's what it meant all along. 2 2 6. Its always brought me despair and sadness and now its mission is complete.

You tell me this the day we break up. And don't get me wrong, its not your fault (I'm sure you know though). I just can't believe it all fell the way it did. . .

>>52 haha. Really? I'm sorry about that.
>>53 yeah. He doesn't have to ask. The website saves the password and he got the fragment of me putting it in anyway~

And oh, >>50, I think I'm going to write it. I think the events that happened today are a good way to end the first book~

Hopefully it goes well.

Sorry about not making updates organized. I don't really like to see this as a game anymore. But more of a way to ease my stress and provide knowlage and a spark of intrest for others.

Extraordinary as always,

Mr-Zorli.

>>53 oh, sorry. I didn't answer you. No. I am not canadian.

Ok... I'm gonna bitch right now and something offensive ot two is probably gonna fly out and I apologize in advance.

But WHAT


THE


FUCK.


I'm so fucking pissed right now at Celty. There no such thing as "making everyone happy"! That was practically the sme thing as saying "Derr nope! Gonna keep dating myself for the rest of my life!"
Even norms without a personality disorder can't make Everyone happy. Someone always gets pissed off at someone else & sooner or later your playing Switzerland or you join one side and consequently lose the other as a friend.

So how the fuck does she expect anything to happen if she keeps living that way??

You ask her if she ever wants a family.
You douse her ass with ice cold water and ask her if Jake can give her that. Not some fake kids in her head that her parents or friends or other children will never see, but live flesh and blood that family and friends will coo over and she can hold in her arms and feel its soft breathing and little heartbeat.

Then ask what her plans are in finding another guy?
"Hi I'm celty and I have multiple personalities"?
Yeah, and when more than half of the crowd runs away and only a few guys are left, then she can say "and one of those personalities is my ex bf".

NO ONE BUT YOU WILL EVER DATE HER FOR A LONG TERM. Maybe some guys will try but that situation is too fucked up and pisses a guy off super easy.

If she can't learn to just ignore jake or play switzerland, then in my mind (and this could offend the both of you), she's choosing a fantasy, a figment of her imagination over you.
When it gets to that point... home girl needs medication.

This disorder is psychological so you really be able to cure something like D.I.D but it is possible to get help for this.

In my opinion, D.I.D is a something possessing rather than another self of you so it may be able to be sorted out.

>>57 Celty cannot help it if she she has another multiple personality. She cannot control her other selves because they can act on there own and unless she has the power too then she wont be able to know what happens when her multiple personalities are out.

>>58 Does it matter? What does that have to do with anything I said?
Jake isn't murderous, so what's the danger in Celty ignoring him, Zorli?

Now i look back and laugh but at the time i really don't know what could have been going through my head... It occured when I was 5-6 years old. My 4-5 year old sister and I got into an argument and got really angry at each other. We both trudged off. Later on, I saw her sitting on a chair so I decided to take revenge. I slowly crept up behind her and climbed onto the chair without her noticing. Then FOR SOME REASON I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND TODAY i decided to take a dump on her. Yes. I SHIT on my little sister. I'd love to here some comments on this. :)

PS i'm 17 now, don't worry i still don't play the same pranks! :P

I was sexually assaulted by my father, who is in jail.
I also got into a fight with a guy at my school and he slaped me so I spit at him. it went back and forth for a while. Until...He was about 5 or 6 ft away form me and he had his mouth open and I spit at him and it landed in his mouth...that was my 7th grade year now I'm in 9th grade and I enjoy punching that guy in the face and our balls/stomach area every time I see him.Be cause he use to bully me..VENGANZA BITCHES!!!

>>4 No. now it's enough.


I thought I could do it. I really did.

I cant save our relationship.

She's not choosing Jake over me.
She's not angry with me.

She just cant take having to be so cruel with Jake.

Would "I" want to see the girl I loved being flirted with everyday by some guy she's in a relation ship with? Everyday? Watch them move in together? Get married? Have children of their own?

No.

And thats what Jake is feeling. He cant just "Go away" or "be ignored". He lives INSIDE of her and will have to experience ALL OF THAT. And SUFFER the whole ride through until She dies, takes him with her, and he figures out where someone who has no soul goes after they die.

He will always be there. and thats that. I wouldn't call myself a caring human being if i did that to someone.

He's in pain. And Kayla has to live with him all her life and she feels terrible that she's putting him through that kind of torture. And I feel bad as well.

Celty and I realize that we are star-crossed. And no matter what, we can never be together and have a normal relationship. She will probably never date again, and neither will I. Not for this reason alone, but for many others that I don't feel I need to mention, for I most likely won't be on the BBS anymore.

She's not getting back with Jake, but just relieving him of his misery by not dating anyone again.

Thank you all for the support on my twisted journey through this.

Maybe I won't write a book. The endings too sad.

Please use this thread to post your Fucked up, twisted stories and hopefully it will help out others more than it could myself. Thank you Dollars.


It's been real~


Extraordinarily twisted as always,






Mr-Zorli




226.

even though the codes different. yes. That was by me.

Goodbye.

Thanh you Mr-Zorli, I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story, and I am sad to see you leave. Best wishes on your "f*cked up fairytale", and I wish you the best.

So, uh.. Reading this thread for the first time.

>>14 This.
and,
>>62 You should definitely put this in a book :I

>>65 but what is there to laugh at?

>>63 Well its been fun reading your story. I wish you the best of luck in the future. Don't forget to drop in and say hi sometimes. ;)

Until next time we meet
-Blockbust

(P.S. Nice Orange xD)

well I can relate to you since I'm in somewhat of an same situation but I'm not even close as "fucked up" as you are, no offense.

>>68 lmfao That was kind of harsh. XD

Feel free to still post Zorli. We'll miss you if you don't. :)
Did you talk to Wednesday yet? We can only try to comfort you, but I think a close friend's words heal wounds the best.

Well I guess I'll hang around for a little while longer. Ha ha.

>>64 Thank you for following it, but I dont think It is over just yet~

>>65 Support for the book huh? I hope you're glad to hear it, that I have started writing it~ I'm a few pages in and am starting from the VERY beginning. Even before the whole ZorliXCelty bit came into play.

>>67 Hi! *smiles* Hello again~ And thank you ha ha. Its the icon i use on my tumblr. I added the orange and some effects to the original picture though.

Want to know something odd?

The first post I saw on tumblr was from a blogger with the name "Headlikeanorange". What are the odds right?

I think the first one or two posts I reblogged were from him, so there's proof. ha ha.

>>68 None taken. It IS f*cked up.

>>69 Aww. Thank yo for caring about me *smiles* I still haven't talked to Wednesday since my last post. Zeeko has though. But I haven't felt well talking about it so I still haven't. I actually took off work for the last two weeks because of 2 things.

Week 1 I took off because the break up. I was just dead . . .
Week 2 I took off because I messed up my leg pretty badly. Its all cramped up and I have a slight limp with it now. The weirdest part is that I had a dream where I got shot in the leg and woke up with a painful cramp. I wasn't exercising or exerting myself all week and then boom. after a nap my leg bombs on me.

Now a similar thing. I took a nap, and my other leg is loosing power. I'm just a mess. Can't even sleep correctly. ha ha.

Well, I guess I'll start this up again. Not sure if a schedule will work but I guess I'll be around~



And I hear I'm not the only one with DID here huh?
Hopefully YOU see this and we can talk. It would really be amazing to get another perspective on this. (Or several)

Hopefully you see this~

Mr-Zorli

After reading a bit more of this page I noticed you saying that the orange head is mostly bottled up anger, in that case he reminds mostly my second personality which I go rid of. Now there is only me and the one I call madness which is close to anger but madness isn't anger but rather thirst to kill which can really be a problem since it comes out if I get punched or hit in some way but luckily I mostly have the control over it.

Do you other personalities ever comment on this thread? I'm just really curious. I'm a gemini and I always feel like I'm switching between personalities!^^
I know it's nothing like this but it's caught my eye.

>>72 If you read his post you would notice...
It's mainly Zeeko though. I dont think anyone else has shown up.

Yo! Zorli! Is this the end man? No more updates?

>>73 In his last post he said "Well, I guess I'll start this up again. Not sure if a schedule will work but I guess I'll be around~"

So it sounds like he isn't going to post on a schedule but hopefully will keep us up to date on what is going on.

Glad to see you will be staying with us for a while longer. :)

>>74 I know. Just remindin him that peeps be waitin~

>>71 wow. Madness reminds me of Orange a lot. That's kind of what happens with him. Don't get me wrong, my dad is NOT abusive, but he got angry one time ans slapped me. Following that slap was him being thrown into his closet like a rag doll and kicked in the stomach. Then thank god, Zeeko forced his was in and ran, locked himself in my room and waited while my dad tried to regain conciousness and comprehand what just happened.

I can't control him at all. Orange. I swear, he is going to kill someone someday and I hope its me rather than anyone else.

>>72 the only one besides me to coment on this so far has been Zeeko. I'll tell him to take the shift on here one day ha ha. His birthday was a week ago or two. He's 26 now.

>>73 I will be updatinng everynow and then. Maybe everyday because I like it here. The Dollars, you all. You are great! And I love talking to you guys *smiles*

>>74 I'll keep you guys updated~!

>>75 Yes. Yes you guys are.
I don't want to keep you guys waitin~ ha ha

Wait... birthday?..

Well he does have an age.. so I suppose a birthday would make sense. But is it the same as your birthday or does he have his own? Oh well, a late "Happy Birthday" from me then.

If he has a birthday.. does he have parents too?? X_X

Wow.Just WOW...And I thought I was the only one weird here...Zorli,I was left totally speechless after reading your story!I know it's kind of like a curse,but you're really unique if you have 5-6 different personalities inside you!!!Maybe writing a book wouldn't be a bad idea after all...XD For one thing,I would definitely buy it!!I have a split personality too,you know.When I was younger,I had some different people living inside me,too!And mine were twelve...T-T Talk about TROUBLE!I'm really lucky,because as I grew up,they started to disappear.Whew!!I couldn't make friends when I was younger because of them...X( Now I only have one person living inside me.Her name is Alice.She's extremely anti-social and shy.She is also very cute!!!

Woah...I never even knew DID existed O.O I can't tell if having it is awesome or terrifying. Though Orange sounds terrifying (I blame you of my recent paranoia of oranges.) Although the part where you can switch when you're getting hurt sounds really useful. Anyway I hope for feeling better feeling about your breakup with Celty. Also...birthday? Alters have birthdays, yep that's confusing. Uh I guess Happy Belated Birthday Zeeko! I also have a question (Sorry if you already answered a question like this but can you talk to your alters freely in your head easily? Do they answer you? Can they talk to you in your head at any time? Ha Ha sorry if I'm bothering you can't help my curiosity! Hope you answer, I certainly love hearing from you and about your life (Sorry if that offended you in any way) :)

Wow...I..uh..just, *blank stare* I think this is probably the most interesting thread I have ever read in my entire life. I can't even begin to wrap my head around how intrigued I am by this right now. Gosh...oh and before I forget, Happy Belated Birthday Zeeko :). Gah, I am now unbelievably excited for your next post, Mr-Zorli. You have now gained another fan xD

Dude you left me speechless. A friend of mine is school has a,similiar problem although is only two personalities. Some people make,fun of,,him. But dude your situation.... Is actually very interesting.

This would make life so interesting i almost envy you


(Your life could be an anime you know that)
.....or maybe it already is...

Hey Zorli! You ever gotten drunk.. with ur personalities??

Wow. Um. I am lost for words, but I can say u and Zeeko have officially gained me as a fan! Happy birthday Zeeko! And I am so sorry about your break up Zorli. This was my first time on the personal board and you have made me glad about my choice! :) and man, that must be tough. Though it must be hard I envy you... Well not really, just... How do I word this? I'm envious of you and Zeeko's close relationship :) I can't wait for ur book and I'm happy you decided to post again! ^.^ so excited for the next update~

Just a little bit of an advice. You wondered that can you kill a personality, I believe that no you cant, but as I have said before I got rid of one of mine. Not bu "killing" it but rather fusing with it. I can not fully explain how it is done but it requires a strong happy feeling, some co-operation from the personality and some strength of mind. I cant explain really well but I got rid of one when I got many good friends at the same time and so Anger my second personality was gone without me even realizing it at first, but now he is me and not in me.

**CHANGING PASSWORD**

Hello again~!

>>78 No. His parents are the same as mine haha. It's kind of hard to explain how they have birthdays. I guess it just came with the programing.

Zorli-- 8Mar
Zeeko-- 5Jan
Orange-- ???
Zoey-- 10Apr
Geeko--12Sep
Lucas--26Dec

>>79 I'm really not the only one huh? *smiles*
Alice huh? I always loved that name.

>>80 Yeah. A lot of people don't. I didn't even know that I had it when I did. I just assumed that I would black out and just forget what I was doing. I only actually tried to talk to my inner family when or Jake told me the inside details about it. Thats when I realized that Zeeko and the gang existed. Realized the reason why my family would say that "You've had a pissy mood today" (Zeeko) or I would find cuts on my hand and not know where they came from (Orange).

Yeah, It's like i can tap out of a situation and tap in when the 'Bad guy' is knocked out ha ha.

This will help when I become a cop. Thats what I'm aspiring to be. I recently applied for BOCES and this is the last week till some climax in it. It will help to have 6 different minds try to figure things out in police/detective work. Especially when the 6th one has the mind of a killer itself.

It's not exactly "freely". More On and Off. Like only sometimes they get it. We have bad reception ha ha.


>>81 Why thank you~ *smiles*
I'll be sure to tell hm that you said happy birthday.
He wanted to go drinking for his party. HA. He had to settle for jello at home. ha ha ha ha.

>>82 That really sucks for him then *frowns*
Hopefully in time he will be in a place where there is no fun being made. *smiles*

>>83 Thank you, but it is no life to envy. Trust me. Life is a lot easier when you have to deal with the people around you rather than those and several inside ha ha.

>>86 HA. Nope. I really don't plan on it either. And jeez. Does everyone assume that teenagers drink? I am probably one of the few who obey the law. Plus me getting drunk at 16 isn't the yellow brick road to wearing a police badge~

>>87 Again, I will carry the birthday message~ Thank you.
*smiles* Yeah. Him and I are like brothers. Literally always at each others side. It's comforting to know that he is always with me, but also annoying when he wants a turn ha ha.

>>88 Fusing with it huh? Well I know you're not lying because I have heard of this before. It IS possible with some type of therapy to fuse with a personality and become one person again.

I have never tried this nor do I know how. I'm not sure if I would want to fuse with them though. I don't really want to loose them either after they've been with me for so long. I would miss them. Plus, I'm not sure if I would be the same person. I would not only be me, but Z. And Zoey, Lucas, Geeko, and Orange. . . . . *shivers*

Well, now that the belated Q&A is over, here's the unfortunate update of the week . . .


Celty's dad is no longer in the picture. I assume most of you dollars guessed that? Well a good 10 if not more years ago, her mom remarried. His name was . . . Lets go with Charlie. Charlie has three kids with Celty's mom. Danny, Sasha, and Jordon.

I've met them and they are really sweet kids. I loved them.

Now if anyone has read my "anonymous letter" that I decided to write that you can find in the personal thread archive, I wrote how Celty had been ignoring me before.

(I would recommend you found it and read it)

Now just this Friday, Charlie died. Don't ask, I dont know how.
This is going to make things on Celtys part MUCH harder and I am extremely upset about that.

An employee at my job passed away in his sleep. My aunts mother passed away. My grandmother died a silent death in the hospital several weeks ago while I was in the room.

These all happened in the same weekend. And I have yet to shed a single tear.

When my mom came up to me, showed me her phone that was on Celty's mom's facebook showing the news, I had to leave and cry my eyes out behind my door.

WHY?

#1 This man was nice when he met Celty at first.
#2 All he did (before he got kicked out several moths ago) was scream and curse at her mom.
#3 Somehow, they were still together and his kids still loved him. Celty despises him.
#4 All he ever did was cause Celty stress and unhappiness causing Jake to come out every time he was near.

So why did this make me cry?

WHY??

I immediately messaged her mom on facebook saying this exactly:

"I know this will just end up being another sorry, but I truely am, and in tears. I don't usually get hit with emotions when it comes to a passing of a loved one, and I didn't really even know him, but this one is hitting me hard for some reason. I truely hope that you are able to cope and forget not his memory, but any sadness you may be dealing with now. And I wish the same for everyone else.

And if you wouldn't mind, dont mention me messaging you to Celty. She would just get angry with me.

God bless you. And hopefully things will look up one day.

-Mr-Zorli"

In short, I am nervous for what she might have to be dealing with. The kids are no doubt in tears, and now they will have to grow up without a father no matter how he acted. Thats probably something on Celty's mind.

I called her earlier today just saying some pointless things. And she said "I cant do this right now. Thank you. For caring. But I cant do this right now." Then hung up.

Kinda shot my day, but while writing this I look at my phone and it says that I have a facebook message from 1pm-ish. It was her saying sorry she was frustrated. I guess at least I'm at ease for she's not mad at me

UGH. This week has been really off the rocker.

I had a dream about 2 weeks ago that I got shot in the leg during a robbery at 7-Eleven. Ever since then, my leg has been cramped and I have to limp when I walk. Talk about nuts. NOW WATCH. Charlie . . . hell with that. I'm not even going to go there.

Well, Stay Extraordinary~

Thats this weeks update for you~

Jeez this was long . . . *frowns*

I forgot your age to be honest, you sound a lot older.
And I don't know what to say.a shitty month you've been having.. and the year's only just begun. All I can figure is that the emotions from other relatives deaths have been building up inside you on a subconscious level, and now that once again, another person who isn't necessarily close to you, but is part of your life, has died, it just broke the dam or popped the cap you placed on emotions. A lot of angst has been happening lately with all these passings plus you and Celty. You just need a good cry. (Hugs) Get well soon. I'm pretty sure you said you were an atheist, so don't make fun of me when I say that I'll pray for you, mkay?

Wow sounds like you have been having a rough time lately. Hope that you will eventually get a break from all the craziness. Wish you luck in becoming a police officer/ detective it sounds like you were made for the job.

Just out of curiosity, about your dream was it you doing the robbing or someone else robbing the store who shot you?

Also totally forgot to come say happy birthday to Zeeko. >.>
Say happy late birthday to him for me.

Hello, I'm here with a bit of a strange request. I believe I may have D.I.D. but I'm unsure because my family/voices/personalities or whatever you want to call them rarely take over my body. I have very few memory gaps where they have taken control of my body. Is this a different disorder or just a different kind of D.I.D. I am not very knowledgeable in this area so any help would be very useful.

Thanks for answering my question *smiles*. 2013 is really not going in your favor, a bad way to start this year. I don't really understand how you feel right now (probably never will)but all I can say is that you deserve one big hug with everything going on around you. I offer you a "virtual hug", it's pretty much all I can offer ^^" You have a fan right here and I'm rooting for you okay! Hoping and praying that everything will soon turn out alright.~

Dude. Don't listen to the person above. When one door closes, another one opens, and it usually leads to a better path. Don't think that ur 2013 is bad, cuz ur just unnecessarily condeming the entire year.

god. talk about a rough time. but as Magnolia said, when one door closes, another one opens. i hope you feel better and cheer up :) you certainly deserve happiness. remember, with every up comes a down but its important to treasure those ups, whether they be few or many and look forward to the ones in the future.
erm, i really suck at wording things(took me 15 min to write this) but i really hope you or anyone else dont take any offense.it wouldnt be the first time someone got mad at something i didn't even know i did TTnTT. if there was any here, it was completely unintentional.
and Zorli, im really sorry for everything that's happened to you. i hope things start to go for the better.

>>94 *laughs* True, true. But honestly it's not like everything is going good for him right now. But as you say, one door closes and another one opens, 2013 is not bad there are just tough and hard times. Eventually it'll get better, right. I apologize if what I said and what I say is stupid or offends anyone in anyway. Hehe.

Wow, this is pretty amazing. I have never met a person with DID before, internet or otherwise. It's funny because I like to sort my thoughts with persona's, if I don't like them, then I try to destroy them, but that doesn't always work. One of the things I like to tell myself is that personification is a very powerful tool,so I personified my yoyo and stone Jaguar on my desk as Claudia and Quintus, Claudia is incredibly creative and whimsical while Quintus is strong and logical. Besides them I have the Island Sun, whose name I sometimes take, I use him to represent my pride and wrath and strength. I suppose I have a captivation with personification.
But you don't really control your persona's, it must hard. I'm sorry to hear about what your girlfriend is going through. The man who died, and his children, I'm sorry for them too.
Yet the world isn't as bad as it seems, so the saying goes.
I feel curoius, would a person in your posistion ever expiriment with personification, or would it seem unappealing.
I should apologize if i come off as rude, or stupid.

>>90 its alright.
And yeah. That might be a reason why. I just got so angry and sad that he died. Because it will make things so much harder for Celty and now those three kids will grow up fatherless, no matter how he was, no ones perfect, but he was still a father to them. He didn't abuse them, but still.
Thank you for your support. And the prayer. I am not atheist.

I believe that there is a God. Somewhere out there. Even if at sometimes it seems there isn't. I don't follow any religions because over time (probably due to bad examples) my faith had just deteriorated. So now I just be nice to people. I never cause any harm to anyone. I live peacfully and try to make others happy. And hopefully there will be a place for me somewhere nice when I die.

>>91 Its been a little rough. And ontop of all of this, me and iONS are slowly seperating. Like everything we talk about now is short and quick, usually loaded with subliminal sarcasm or some kind of invisible jab. Its just a little awkward to talk to iONS now. We usued to be so close. Tell each other everything. But now its just not the way it used to be. . . But back to your post~

Someone was robbing the store, and I got shot. And guess what? My leg is still half parylized. I have to limp on it and can't sit with my left leg straight out. And he said thank you to all the birthday wishes. I'll tell him to show up here sooner or later.

>>92 sorry for taking so long to get back on here first of all. You were probably waiting for an answer . . . Well, in your case it might be pre-D.I.D. I remember myself looking this up once but then again, I'm just some kid in highschool. So I really don't want to diagnose you with it when I really don't know. Depending on you position in life, if you could arrange a meeting with a therepist that might work out better. If they take over your body, rarely on not, that's still a very important factor. Hopefully you can find some answers soon.

>>93 Yeah. The year really didn't start out in my favor.
But its been getting better slowly. And thank you very much for the hug *smiles* made my day~

>>94 huh? He wasn't being mean or cruel in anyway. He told it like it is. That's all~ Now even though sometimes I live by the law of attraction, sometimes its best to tell it how it is to start a clean slate, and remind yourself about what you want to fight to make better. In my case. This year. And I would never condemn a whole year just by the begining. But what you say about the doors is absolutle true. And maybe they're opening all around me right now~

>>95 its been quite rough lately. But just even more recently, things have been really good. And thank you. That means a lot. Saying that I deserve happiness. But I really don't understand why me.

Here's a little thing with me that I always think about.

Why me? When I really think about it. My life is perfect. Sure there are a few huge speed bumps, but I have a family. A full set. A bunch of great friends. And money is never a problem. And I've never been bullied.

Everyone I know has one of these problems:
Bullying
Fatherless
Poor money situations
Disabilities
Alcohal problems
Graduation issues
No parents at all
Possible evictions from households.

And then there's me. Sure I have D.I.D. but I have a home. A loving family. Upper middle class. Loads of friends. Never been bullied. Healthy family. A well paying job. Good grades. It just makes me wonder what the hell I did to be so lucky . . .

And don't worry. I always give people the benifet of the doubt, and on here I expect people to be curious and ask questions. They may be offencive, but how would they know what might be? So I never take anythings to offense. Its alright~
Thank you for the support~

>>97 Wow. That's really cool how you percieve your personas like that. Before I knew anything about D.I.D. iONS and I would call our 'personas' P-Mode, C-Mode, F-Mode, and so on. They were like Philisophical mode, Calm mode, Funny mode, and again, so on. I think everyone percieves their personas in different ways. Yours is really interesting though~ *smiles*

And now the part you've all been waiting for, ha ha.

Update time~

So I needed a few days to just settle myself down because of all that happened and it kind of got to me (feeling sad) because Celty was absant for the remainder of last week. And this week she hasn't been in gym once. So I think she changed her period. Which makes me really sad . . But I guess no one can fix me if I'm part of the problem~

And lately I've been torn. Torn between wanting to fix an unfixable problem, and bleeding to death trying, or actually attempting to move on.

Like, my heart want someone to love, but I love Celty. But it won't work out. And even though I love her, should I let her go and avoid hurting myself further? Part of me wants to let her go, but another side is saying "wait. What if she's ignoring you, and things have been rough because of situations. And the second you let go and move on, there she comes walking?"

Ugh. Its really confusing. *bleh*

But now for the better sides, (or happier) I'm not much of an actor, but I decided to do a skit to try and win something with a friend of mine. It seemed fun, and in the spur of the moment I said yes ha ha.hopefully it will be fun~

I also started talking to . . . Her name on here will be Verona. She is a really quiet girl who's been in a few of my classes and we just started talking. She's really nice, and if you couldn't guess, she's part of the other side of the Celty factor. But I don't doubt its just mixed emotions trying to find something to bond with. So we talked for a while and she told me about her 'one' friend . . . Her name will be Charlotte. And they both smoke together and stuff.

They invited me over next Thursday and said I could smoke with them if I wanted to and I said why not~ Once or twice won't kill me or anything like that. *meh*

And oh, by any chance, if anyone is close enough to go to Nnew York Comic-con next year, I'll be there and wouldn't mind meeting a fellow dollar~!

Truthfully, Im a little jealous.. Ive always wished that I had other personalities in my body so I'd never get lonely and Im just reading through this thread thinking "DAMN! I really want to meet this guy" but of course I know that there would be pros and cons but I'd be willing to deal with them.

eh...why not you? sure you have all that, but i think everyone deserves happiness, especially those going through rough times. and you certainly have a good heart! and thnx! :)

erm. im not really sure if i can give any advice or anything scince i've never been in your situation but keep up what your doing! just hang in there!

I feel kinda relieved to know that I'm not the only one with D.I.D .. My alternate personas appear and start wrecking up my train of thoughts. Although I don't have any names for them but they are the exact opposite of who I am on the extreme ends. They start talking in my head when I listen to different music (I absolutely LOVE music and can't stop finding for more.) Their personalities are based on the nature of the music's tune and when I'm alone, they "take over" and I start acting under it's influence. Surprising thing is, no one has caught me while the other "me" is in control..

>Be 14
>Bring shrek 1 & 2 to class
>Tell teacher we must watch shrek
>Teacher makes class vote for which movie to watch
>shrek 2 has majority vote
… >feelsgoodman.jpeg
>Then, Francis pulls out Despicable Me and hands it to teacher
>Everyone in class votes for it and laughs at me
>Teacher throws my shreks back at me and puts Despicable Me in DVD player.
>As the disc loads, I hear loud footsteps from outside. The rumbling shakes the desks and chairs.
>The smell of onions filled the room.
>Suddenly, naked Shrek bursts through the wall and looks at DVD menu of Despicable Me in anger.
> “Ogre m’aye dead bodeh”
>Shrek throws two onionades at the tv and kills the teacher and a deaf girl.
>”Dohble Keel”
>Shrek punches through a kid’s chest, pulls out his heart and replaces it with an onionade
>kid explodes.
>”Treeple Kehl”
>Shrek grabs Francis as he tries to escape and bends him over.
>He pulls out Francis’ intestines through his butthole and ties an onion to it.
>Shrek then tosses the onion out the window and Francis is dragged out with it.
>Francis falls 8 stories to his death.
>”OGREKEEEEL!”
>Shrek turns around to rest of the class.
>He quietly whispers, “Thees is the pahrt whehre you run away.”
>Entire class jumps out of windows to their death.
>”SHREKSTERMINATION”
>Shrek turns to me.
>He looks me in the eye and smiles.
>”Bet yeh weren’t shrekspecting thAt.”
>”I-Is it….ogre?” I ask.
>”It’s ogre when Aye say it’s ogre”
>I fall to my knees at his majesty.
>I was ready to please Shrek.
>He pulled out his massive ogresized eshrekt cock and lodged it in my throat.
>My eyes filled with tears.
>mfw they were happy tears.
>Shrek let out a loud ogre roar as he filled my esophagus with sour cum and onion sauce.
>He pulled his cock out of my mouth but as I wiped away my tears, I noticed he was already gone.
>Shrek is love, shrek is life.

>>99 We might be able to meet. If you're close enough to go to the next Comicon in NY~ ha ha.

>>100 *smiles* Thank you very much for such kind words. I hope that everyone can achieve happiness one day.

>>101 do you know for a fact you have D.I.D.? Because hopefully I didn't make you think you do because of what I have said. But yeah, in one way I can relate to you. Like, when I first realized I had it, they were a lot more. . . Easy to live with? Like when we swap now, its more random and unpredictable. In the begining, we could use music to swap. Like the heavier rock hardcore rap loaded with curse words triggered Zeeko, and classical, light dubstep,calm, sereal lyrical music would trigger me,and so on.

Its the same with me. Like no one would notice that the other me's would take over. Can you speak with them or the one?

>>103 . . . For anyone who read this post before it was taken down, I think you would be wondering the same thing.

What.
The.
Fuck. Ha. Ha.


PLEASE READ THIS BELOW ANYONE ABOUT TO POST HERE.

Now, I know that the title message says to post your F*cked up story here, but I think I'm just going to make this about me. Like, I don't want to be like an attention hog or anything . . . But just to make things more organized. You know? So I made another thread for weird or messed up stories, and there will just be for my continuous one. Everyone okay with that? I don't want to sound rude but yeah. Organization~

And as for this weeks update, I finally decided to let go of Celty. But it weird you know? To let go of something that I've held so dear for so long? And I know once I said I would rather bleed to death, but I can't. I won't bleed to death.

What made me finalize this decision was a puzzle.

Its a puzzle called Water,Oil, Electricity. A puzzle where you attempt to connect houses, with each company. The lines can not cross. Its an impossible puzzle and since I couldn't solve it, I figured out that somethings you CAN'T solve. When you're in a checkmate, you take the loss, and start a new game. Or you'll end up hurting yourself trying to find an exit.

Oh and as for the personalities Zoey gropped Wednesday.

Yeah. How's that for a transition? Ha ha ha ha ha. Yup. Right in the back room. Weds was just walking out, Zoey pops in, and grabs a handful of my female co-workers tits.

. . .

Wednesday reacted like so:

W: What the fuck? Oh. Its just you. You can squeeze harder if you want. Or you can do this~ *proceeds to shove my head inbetween her boobs*

Zoey: asdfghjk~~~~~~

W: See you later~ *wink* *walks away*



. . . . .

Needless to say, when I got the fragment, I almost died.
Zeeko had trouble controling himself when he got his fragment.

I went over to talk to Wednesday later during break and she said "No problem dude. It was actually really funny hahaha!".

So everything was fine.

. . . Omg . . . When killing a personality is possible without killing yourself, pleasel someone notify me!

*facepalm*

Well . . . I guess you can't delete a comment even if it IS on your own thread. So owned of post number 103, if you would ever be so kind to remove it, please do so.

Or if anyone else can remove that . . . Um . . . Rather unique story, I would thank thee greatly. And goodnight~!

Omfg. Zoey that horny bitch. I swear to god if she was real. Aswedrfgthyj

But anyway, thank you all who wished me a happy birthday!! To bad I couldn't get drunk though lol.

He wouldn't let me drink, but he's going over two stoner chick houses to get himself high? Sheesh. And I thought I was the extroverted one lolololol. So yeah. When she groped Wednesday, o.m.f.g.

I literally almost lost it. The next thing Zorli is doing is walking out of the bathroom going "no no no no"omg. Haha. Yeah. If you couldn't tell, or didn't already know, I'm a huge perv. Haha. Aaaaand since I'm tired as fuck, I'm going to sleep. Later!!!

>>103 uh.....what the hell? please delete.

>>104 I think it was a good idea to let go of Celty, try to move on and all that other cliché stuff, you know?
and as for Zoey and Wednesday.....erm, its a good thing Wednesday was okay with it, thoughu I have to say that was a very unique reaction...
im also as confused as Zeeko. How come you wont let him drink but you will get high? just curious~

>>106 what do you mean you almost lost it? sorry..im a little slow to pick things up...

>>107 Don't ask stupid questions regarding sexual topics. If you don't know what they mean, you're too young to be reading it in the first place. Shoo.

>>108 I don't think it's stupid. It's kind of an ambiguous statement. I honestly thought he meant lost it like laughing too hard. But I guess it can be seen as sexual too. It didn't make sense though why SHE was in control but HE almost lost it. I guess all of his personalities know what the other is doing...

I got a story for you. My name is Zach and I'm 15 years old. I don't have D.I.D. but I do have Schizophrenia and Migrant Depression. Life for me isn't that bad it's just hard sometimes. Sometimes I'll be taking a test and I'll just pass out. After a while I wake up and I'm home. Sometimes people wil say "hey" to me one day but the next they look at me like I murdered someone. I mean I hope I didn't or I should say "one of me" didn't hurt anyone. I have very nice and cool friends and I've had a couple girlfriends. The last one I really felt for but she said she couldn't take it anymore and she left. I can't say it didn't hurt but its nothing for me to cry over. If I could stop it then I would and I'm stuck like this so I might as well get use to it. Life in this world had been pretty amazing and I've come to know many different sorts of people. Some are good while others are bad. I'd say I'm pretty smart and I do really good in my classes. Like I said before I have really good friends and I can count on them to help me out and/or stop me when I get to out of hand. Sometimes things aren't always as good though. Every now and then I have this one dream. I'm walking around and I walk into this building. I step inside and the lights come on and I see a room full of me's all in different clothing with tags on their shirts. Each time I talk to a different personality. THen after we talk they all say "You cant gid rid of us Zach. No matter how much you try. Were all you" Then it ends and I wake up. What do you think?

>>1 the number 226 is part of my home phone number

I don't think I really have an alternate personality, but I sometimes find myself somehow in a certain feeling, unsure of how I got to that point. I sometimes scare my own friends, and when I ask them what is wrong, they look at me like I'm crazy. I'm seriously a nice person, and I don't understand this weird anger that I sometimes feel. I know that when I'm in that feeling that I need to calm down, but it's not easy. And I scare my friends. It's not exactly f*cked up, but it's along those lines.

I don't think I really have an alternate personality, but I sometimes find myself somehow in a certain feeling, unsure of how I got to that point. I sometimes scare my own friends, and when I ask them what is wrong, they look at me like I'm crazy. I'm seriously a nice person, and I don't understand this weird anger that I sometimes feel. I know that when I'm in that feeling that I need to calm down, but it's not easy. And I scare my friends. It's not exactly f*cked up, but it's along those lines.

I don't think I really have an alternate personality, but I sometimes find myself somehow in a certain feeling, unsure of how I got to that point. I sometimes scare my own friends, and when I ask them what is wrong, they look at me like I'm crazy. I'm seriously a nice person, and I don't understand this weird anger that I sometimes feel. I know that when I'm in that feeling that I need to calm down, but it's not easy. And I scare my friends. It's not exactly f*cked up, but it's along those lines.

My dad got the crabs once. Decided to try and get rid of them with industrial-strength pesticide... let's just say there was a lot of screaming involved.

Of all the reasons where I've had to be dragged to a hospital, this is the only one where I laugh every time.

Hey:D
I want to here more abut your story
And I`d like to help if posple

Bump

<<1 226 where did you see or here that number.

Based on what you have said, Mr-Zorli, does that mean I possibly have D.I.D? Should I see a psychiatrist? If so, please email me at Kuronekodollars@gmail.com.

hot hot image!

:D i loved reading this! (i wish i could meet or knew some one like Mr-Zorli. it would be interesting.) please continue this thread!!! Also i really want to read your book!

wtf!

wtf!

bump

I'm very interested in how you ended up with DID, although that's personal. I wish you the best of luck.

bump

bump

I see, wish you the best of luck. Hope it also won't affect your love life.

I stepped on a pile of legos bare foot

This is quite an interesting like here. o.o Also as Magnolia said, you should keep this updated weekly. It's an interesting thing to read about. c:

please continue this thread! i want to see more... Q-Q

>>130 Damn thats hard man, I feel for you bro.

When i was at the age of 4 my mom was dating a guy and he would come over our house and if i would mess up on something i would get bet with a wire and sometimes i would bleed do to the beting and when he and my mom would go to work i would stay with a guy who would babysit me and i got along with him,he was my best friend then one day he was taking care of some other kids on my street and we were playing hide n seek in the house and i wanted to hide under the bed while the others were hiding in the living room david (the babysitter) told the kids it was time for their nap while i was still hiding when david found me in the dark room he placed me on the bed and locked the door behind him and told me "we are going to play a new game the game is called 'touch' and the rules are simple all you have to do is touch the other person where ever you want touch so let's start okay" i looked at him and sat there and he sliped his hand up my shirt i just looked up and then david touches my chin and lowers my head and said "see it easy but lets keep it a secret between us okay no adult should know about this okay" i said okay he looks into my eyes and i look into his and he says "i love you with all my heart" then he kisses me on the lips and i felt tears going down my cheeks and when he saw he cry he said "you are so quiet and cute" i look at him and smiled then he took his hand out from my shirt and told me to go take a nap and i ki ept his promes ^_^

*kept*

This is by far one of the most relevant threads I've ever seen. My buddy has D.I.D, and he's got some MAJOR issues. You seem to have a pretty good handle on things. But this guy...DAMN. He'll be my friend one second, and then all of a sudden start freaking out and stabbing himself with whatever he's holding, then he'll turn into this athletic guy, and then he gets all lovey dovey...It's really freakin' scary. But, hey, you seem like you've got more control.

Amazing story so far Mr.Zolri. I defiantly think you should write that book. Just remember that your story isn't over yet. You have a whole life ahead of you. One thing I've learned from my experiences(which are far from being as entertaining or educational as Mr.Zolri's) is that life is exactly like a roller coaster. It will keep moving with or without you, it has it's ups and downs, opportunities will come and go, and you can not control what it throws at you. Just remember, if all you do is look behind you and wonder what else could have happened, you will miss what is happening in the here and now(sorry i'm a bit late on the advice, but that's my two cents on the hard parts of life). Anyways, I really can't tell if I should envy you or be glad I'm "normal". On the one hand, the others can be pretty useful(not having to deal with overpowering things, knowing there are others inside you that have your back, etc.) but it also can be difficult(orange in general and the incident with Zoey and Wednesday(which if anything like that where to happen around any of my friends, they would no doubt punch me in the face, and probably avoid me the rest of my life. like >>107 said "that was a very unique reaction")). I guess one question I have(which you may have already addressed and I accidentally skipped or forgot(if so, I apologize)) would be is there one person "in command"(like a leader who says what the others can and can't do when out) or is it just "ok, I'm out so i'm going to do what I want"?
well, I wish you the best of luck in everything.
a fellow dollar,
2A

bump

Heh, well now I know I'm not alone on the Dollars. Ii believe I might have D.I.D. I've never been tested, since my mom believes thosse who have phychological issues are idiots, but I have been recording these findings myself. I find that I barely have any memories of myy middle school years, and it kinda sucks..... But the funny thing is that someone anmeed Maya started talking to me. I went and checked up the name, which means invisible. So that might mean sommething? And then recently there's been Alice who is a complete sassy, slutty thing. And then there is Shadow, and it's gender is unknown, but it tends to say very dark things.

Bumpity bump

God damn has it been a while.

Hello.

I don't know if I will be posting here anymore or not, but I just wanted to let you guys know that everything is going well. I don't really know what to say besides thank you to everyone who tried to assist me with this problem.

I guess I owe you an update huh?


Well then. Where to begin...

I guess first of all, I will start by saying that Celty is gone. No longer in the picture. After countless efforts to get her back, I failed, and eventually gave up trying.

I lost Ions' friendship recently, and my personalities have seemed to have vanished, without a trace.

Now, where does this turn "alright?". Okay.

Towards the end of February, Cracker began to seem more friendly to me In my time of need. I had been seriously trying to repress any memory of Celty and her personalities and honestly, it was working. I began to see Cracker as more of a friend to me. Especially when she invited me over her house for Valentine's day. The funny thing is, she didn't like me. Not at all. I went over, and was really starting to like her.

Ions was my best friend, and Cracked was my second. So I didn't want to risk a great friendship over stupid feelings.

We had a great day and that was the end of it.

I'm going to make this short and get to the end. I don't have much time left from where I am. (places to go, people to see)

eventually after a whole long story that I'll tell later, Cracker and I began going out, and honestly, I've never been happier in my life.

16Apr13

My last gift to Celty was the necklace . I got my friend "Messenger" to deliver it for me. It was supposed to be her Christmas gift, but we had broken up come the first day after holiday break. I never said another word to her and watched as she left the school on the final day.




Our Paths may never cross again.


I lost Ions just this week, due to misunderstandings. Yes, I've been ignoring her, but that's just because she doesn't know what happened to me.

I don't really remember her.

To her, I've been acting like an asshole. Ignoring the promises we've made. But I don't know if my inner family alerted my memory of her.

Because maybe at one time she was a close friend, but now, it seems as if she is just another person I've dubbed "acquaintance".

I've ignored her all summer and eventually she flipped on me. I said maybe it was best for us to go our own
ways, and she excepted with her middle finger in the air.

I don't know what promises I've made to her, but I'm sorry.


As for my inner family, I feel like they're still here, but only ever so often. I have short black outs once or twice a month of im lucky, and wake up in another place.

The thing is, I don't remember what happens in those lost memories. And I can't communicate with my inner family anymore.





I feel like a huge part of me has been taken away, but in return, a better, unbroken piece has replaced the gap that once was called my heart.



It almost seems like I've been taken out of the extraordinary life I was cursed with, and blessed with a normal one.



I guess the moral of my story is literally, be careful what you wish for.

I wished for an extraordinary, unnatural, exciting life, and I couldn't handle it.


For everyone out there wishing to go on an adventure, just be careful. This "mundane" life we all live, and the ritualistic life of routine and normality we call Today, Yesterday, and Tomorrow is the only thing that keeps us sane and functional.

Take it from someone who knows what an extraordinary life is.

I believe Izaya mentions this to Mikado in an episode. That there's no turning back. You would have to keep evolving to stay extraordinary.

I'd rather go extinct.



Well, I guess that's all.


Maybe I will post here every now and again.

I hope you all enjoyed my fantastical tale.

I'm glad it's finally over.

I wish you all luck in your life, and hope it is Normal. That it's a life you can be happy of.

A life to make you smile.

And by the way, this was all fake.






Haha. I'm kidding.

Farewell for now my Dollar friends!!

Thank you all again, and

sayonarara.

*smiles*





Stay normal~






-Richie.

Don't worry about the password being different btw. I just forgot my original one ha ha.


I love you all for what you've done for me.


See you later.

this made for an interesting read. I remember once watching a documentary about a middle aged man with several people in his head, one was a 'protector' much like your rather popular big bro, it was interesting to see the switch in his expression. Sadly the show was about how the 12 year old living in his head was sick of being treated like a kid, and thus raped the dominant personality's real girlfriend. I was quite young when I saw this and don't remember how it ended. But I still remember the change in his expression, went from tears to a death stare in an instant.
despite my poor memory of this show, after watching it I have always been interested in this disorder. I have OCD, and it manifests itself via my need for a constant on going dialogue, if a conversation stops without a definitive ending, I become quite irritate. and if I am not talking to another person, or am not deeply engaged in a cognitive activity, I uncontrollably talk to myself, not out loud, though if I am by myself, or really into my conversation I will mouth out the words I am thinking, or even whisper them. It is so beyond my control that it effects my ability to fall asleep.
Because of this I have always thought it would be nice to have some company in the back of my head, But I know it is unrealistic to assume it would all be sunshine and roses. Typically my internal conversations are set as if talking to someone else, the person depends on the topic, but they are all people I know, or at least, know of.

I enjoyed reading this tale, and found it quite informative, I'm sure I will be reflecting what I read tonight for several hours while I pray to become tired enough to pass out.

I am glad to see that the troubles are behind you for now, and hope all continues to go well.

With that I shall conclude my post, as I have been meaning to stop typing for some time now, but as I've said when I get going, it's hard to stop. Thank you for taking the time to write all this out, it is among the top three most interesting posts I have ever read.... it may even take first place, and worst, second.

Hey zorli, just finished passing through this, took one hell of a long time man haha. If this was real or not i dont give a damn, if your ever down in texas near edinburg, the dollars texas branch will welcome you

I wish you luck man. Amazing story. I hope things start normal with you.

wow. this was an incredible (and incredibly LONG) thread
Its great that things turned out the way that they are right now, I hope you are having a great time at the moment as well. It took quite a while to read the whole thread, but at the same time, Im glad that I got to learn your story. :3

Bump

This was a very interesting read! I had a friend who got diagnosed with D.I.D. also, but we don't really talk anymore. I don't think I have ever talked with anyone of her other personalities besides the "main" one, though.

I know I'm in a weird situation myself. See, I have this weird boy I call "Alex". But I'm positive I don't have D.I.D., because I never have "black outs" or anything like that. Alex is just some guy who talks to me in my head, and I always feel like he's there next to me even when I'm alone. If that makes any sense.

Fairly recently I actually had a falling out with my friends because they think something is wrong with me mentally. They think I have B.P.D., but I'm too nervous to find a new therapist who specializes in these kinds of things and talk with my dad about it because my friends had a "feeling" haha

I hope you're doing well! And again, amazing story! I'd totally buy your book :)

Omg. This is awesome. I'd buy your book, definitely. Bump.

Man, this entire thread is just really damn interesting. I'd totally buy your book.

>>142 That was a fucking beautiful thing to read. I remember being very young and wanting an exciting, interesting life and boy fucking golly did I get one. I don't like saying I'd take it back, but jesus I wish I could. Being different isn't all it's cut out to be.
>>149 (if you're concerned about it, talk to a school counselor or whatever. They'll set you on the right track, hopefully)

when I was five I was called a monster and hit with a stick on my head, thanks to that I have a scar behind my ear. My older sister died saving me. My mother believes I am cursed and step father abuses me. I am always getting into fights on the streets and at school. Had an ear ring ripped out of my ear due to a resent fight. Even though I am a 15 year old girl I am regarded as a monster and my 'best friend' is trying to get me expelled from school. Even the counsellor has it out for me because of my 'best friend'. There is no one I guess I can rely on.

Well... My story isn't that f*cked up, but it's a bit abnormal compared to what they call 'normal people'.

Since I was little, I have this 6th sense thing that really scarred by baby moments. I was a baby, so I don't remember anything, but my parents and relatives always say how bad spirits tried to take me away a lot of times. And I always look at empty spaces as if something really was there.

Then my childhood came. By this time, I really thought that spirits are a part of the normal life. I also thought that everyone can see them too, but they just chose to ignore them. So I ignored them too, treating spirits like they're not there at all. They don't talk to me, so why the hell should I talk to them? And as a kid, I'm very hostile when it comes to meeting strangers.

Like... literally... You see flying people and hanging heads ( once there was a flying papaya fighting the rain ) everyday. I'm kind of a late learner. It wasn't until I'm a teen that I knew they weren't exactly human. As a child, I'm more afraid of monsters than spirits.

It was only when I am a teen that I actually tried bonding with the spirits. They're actually serve as a better family than my human ones. They don't scream at you. They understand you ( i think ), and they are always there when nobody was around to help me. The first time when I get molested after school, I cannot bring myself to tell my family, so I cried alone in my room. Then every single spirits that stayed in my house came to my room and sat there, watching and waiting for me to cool down. One ( who I names Elijah ) held my hand. My body froze, I cant hold her back, but the warmth was overwhelming. I cried more for hours, but they never leave my side.

I would like to go further, but I'll bore you people out.

So have your personalities talked to you lately?

Well i wouldn't say this is a messed up or twisted story but its why im scared about every new day:
Well where ever i am or who ever im around im always somewhat different, ranging from what makes me laugh to the tone of my voice and even my choice of words. Sometimes i can swear and not think about it twice but other times i wouldnt dare even speak. I am constantly scared of accidentaly being someone else around the wrong people. And even stranger i will argue with like the 3 or so different voices in my head and all of them think something compleatly different, like some of them were saying i should even say anything here even when I noticed the D.I.D story reminded me of the battle the rages on in my mind every day, around my friends i am like Stephen Hawking but around my family im the dumbest person on the planet, and damn this is why im glad i found this because i would of never spoken about this. But back to what i was saying, it is kind of what makes it hard for me to get a girlfriend because one day im the nicest person ever then the next im somewhat different and they never speak to me again. I always try to make people feel better but never feel good about myself because one voice in my head is yelling at me, im not like little kid young but im not like a fully grown man, so i don't know weather this will bite me in the ass or will just be something me and me alone will have to deal with.

bump~

>>142 I'm at a loss for words. There's so much I want to say after reading your posts, Mr-Zolri. Where to begin?

First of all, thank you for letting us take part in this extraordinary and confusing stage of your life. Thanks for your compassion, your trust and your dedication. Thanks for having the courage to lay yourself bare before the Dollars *bows deeply*

I'm truly happy for you that things are going so well with Cracker and that you finally got the "ordinary" life you wished for. You've come a long way, and I pray that the hardships with your D.I.D. have really come to an end now. To me it seems that your inner family has faded into what they should have been from the beginning - namely the silent council of your personality.

While you might feel regretful about your cut with Celty, I think it was probably for the better. I hope this doesn't too heartless, but her D.I.D. might have affected your own condition more than you thought.
This constant, mutual stimulation of different identities in combination with various relationships among one another (Zeeko with Layla, you with Celty and Jake) might have been what kept them whithin your and her consciousness longer than necessary. It could have been easier for your inner family members to detach themselves from your everyday life after this stimulant was gone. Just my speculation, though.

You must feel sad and confused, now that you can't communicate with Zeeko and the others at all anymore. However, if you were ever happen to ponder over why they left, where they went or where they came from to begin with, don't. Some things are better left unknown.
Btw, it's not that strange not to remember one's childhood. I'm a blessed, ordinary person: no grave pubertal trouble, no familial or other relationship issues, neither monetary nor health difficulties - nothing. Nevertheless, I can't recall more than a handful memories from my childhood, either. Not even about my own mother although she's alive and well, and we live happily with our new family. I have a single memory of my mother from the first five years of my life and none of my biological father, even though I knew him, and we met and talked several times according to my mother. I've stopped musing about these things, and I believe - it might sound presumptious coming from an outsider like me - you shouldn't dig too deep, either.

Let me express through the words of a great manga author:
"Life will continue, in the midst of a series of 'incidents'. The unseen future is frightening, but regret is a thing of the past. However, when you put yourself in the future of the past, you become so blinded that you cannot see the present."

I'm glad we got to know both you, Mr-Zolri, and Zeeko in person but I still hope for you that your D.I.D. issues have been completely resolved. I wish you good luck with your relationship, your apprenticeship as a policeman and everything else that might cross your path in the near future. Please don't forget the Dollars and come back to visit us once in a while.


Yours, Litair

Well. Before I moved, I went around being the nice-guy of the school. I was the straight gay-friend if that is a helpful metaphor. Escaped the friendzone a good three or four times. And apparently people thought that made me a God. Was that effed up enough for you?

My friend and I robbed two dealers of four ounces of Amnesia Haze and 100 hits of acid. Never felt so alive in my life. This is the feeling of complete bliss

>>1 It's nice to hear of others with this disorder only I don't like calling it that because there's nothing wrong with us. We are not crazy ^^ I've had this for a while but organizing everyone into "clear" voices is incredibly difficult since everyone is always arguing <.< we just take over and take our turns being the "conscious" mind the rest stay somewhere else and well argue since we're all so different. Very few people know that I have this though so it's nice to be able to talk about it ^^

It makes me think...

>>159 Your words are absolutely heart warming. Thank you oh so very much for what you have said.

You truly are a wonderful person. And I will take your advice.


And if anybody would like to know, I will be attending this year's Comicon in NY fri-sun. It might be cool meeting a dollars member. You know?

It appears my story isn't as f*cked up, but still going on.

You know iONS? Well her and I are more like enemies now. Like I wouldn't be surprised if she wanted to kill me.

And here begins the prequel to the Celt arc.

I met iONS in 3rd grade. She claims 2nd. But we became the best of friends. We separated after elementary school and most of middle school, but rejoined around freshman year.

Haha freshman year I couldn't remember for the life of me. But something during that year, something clicked. And I saw iONS as more than a friend. I started to really like her.


Over the summer months we mostly sent letters to each other (via notes by deviantart.com). I felt like we got so close with each other. I hoping she felt the same.

Yeeeaahh... Just a heads up. At the time, I was christian.

So me also being white, and her being an immigrant from Pakistan, Muslim, and having extremely strict parents, that really has no odds of turning out well.


I'll tell more soon.

I think this page is more or less just a public diary of my life. But oh well.



Clarity of or the past.

Not my story, but I found it on tumblr and thought it was appropriate for this thread.

Hello Mr Zorli! I just read this entire thread and... Omg, I just don't know how I feel right now.

Honestly, your story amazed me and made me a little jealous. I also always wanted something "special" in my life, so I understand what you meant. Somewhere, I think I would like to have another personnality, just to never be alone... But I understand how much of a burden this must be.

I really enjoyed to read your story and I would really like to read your book, if you ever write one. Please say it here if you do so! Thank you for sharing all this with us and for anwering for the questions. I am a really curious person and this really interested me. Seeing the life with your point of vue... No really, thanks for sharing this.

You really are an amazing person and I am really happy that things kind of settled, even if somewhere I am sad that Zeeko will not appear again (I kind of liked him xD). But this is nothing compared to the fact that you will be able to live a normal life. You really deserve happiness. And upper you say that you don't understand why you are so "gifted" in life... Well let's just say that for me, having D.I.D isn't what I would call an easy path of life... Even though I don't have it. Anyway, I don't think I am making myself clear here (I usually speak french, my english is a little rusted), so sorry if I offended you in anyway. I just want to say thank you and be happy.

And please, write this book. More I think of it the more I want to read it xD. And maybe it could help other people...

>>166 I laughed way harder than I should've.

>>166 That is wrong...on five levels.

>>166
uhhhmmmmmmm............... 0_0 poor kid.
though this was really wrong in so many levels.... though this was a bit funny. :P

>>166 jesus christ....I never thought someone could do smth like that, at least she didn't do anything weirder for protection against "satan" ._. ...i knew humans were really interesting..damn it i found it funnier than i should have -3-

>>166 Yea... I'm gonna go throw up now.

Wtf goes through the minds of some people... (I'm not judging! I'm insane on many levels but wow..just wow..).....That poor kid :(

>>166 that, was rather funny. Hah.

Alright, back where I left off.

It's weird saying this now, but I fell for iONS. I thought she was perfect. But little did I know, she was just a homewrecker. Deceit, hidden under that smile.

she loved/still loves messing with people's hearts, and minds. The kind of person that would pick at your brain to make your face tick.

Taken for a fool. Guess I was, because I was a fool.

We sometimes stayed after school together and sat by a fence. Just talking about random things. Those are honestly the nicer memories I have of iONS. Good times, they were. But all good things (sometimes) must come to an end.

We were in the art society and had a field trip. We went to NYC for a museum trip. There she was, sitting beside me. On the bus ride back to Li. Asleep on my shoulder. (ugh) I guess I was nothing but a pillow to her?

I thought maybe, just maybe it meant something you know? It wasn't even friend zoned. I was being played the whole time.

I forgot to mention this, but in the beginning of my sophomore year, I met the love of my life today, Cracker. We were in the same math class for about 2 days, but then I got transferred into Celtys. Celtys and I also had the same art class. All year long.

We weren't very close at all in the beginning (Celtys and i) but obviously... Later on-

anyway, when Cracker met iONS (note, I had feelings for iONS. NOT cracker in any way (yet) ) Cracker seemed a little off as I can recall.

Cracker and I became better friends by talking together in creative writing before she met iONS so I knew something was weird but oh well.

Cracker invited me over her house one day, and I actually didn't want to go. Nothing against her, I just didn't want to go. But the second that Cracker said iONS was going to be over my heart stopped. I quickly changed my answer to yes, and headed over there.

iONS has extremely strick parents, so she was never really able to go over friends houses. Which is why I was so shocked that she was able to go over Crackers. And didn't those two just meet? I brushed those questions away and decided to ignore them.

BUMP

BUMP

bump

then what happened ?

Bump, we want an update.

changing ! password

new ! password

*cracks fingers*

Let's Begin.

I'll continue with the iONS arc later, but for now, let us talk about some real time events.

Due to a stimulus that occured roughly 15 minutes ago, It cause Orange to come out of me for several short bursts at a time for about 3 minutes.

He used my body to speak. I've heard his voice in my dreams before, but never in real life. It was as clear as day.

It was like I was possessed, unable to control my own mouth as he spoke. My voice was demented and my vocal chords made sounds I never thought I could make. His voice was terribly raspy and cold. My head spun and I shook knowing he is still here.

I personally believe that Cracker and I are going to do just fine, but there's always been a little voice in my head whispering words of doubt into my brain.

I now know it was him. It scares me to think about him still being here but also relied that I've been able to keep him under chain this long. for roughly half a year.

I'll write more tomorrow.





-Zorli

It's tomorrow.

Cracker is a good person at heart, but can be a little foolish sometimes. Not making me love her any less btw.

She definitely has depression, which is not helped by her home life. She has a mother who constantly embarasses her and calls her names for no reason


She stole about $104.00 worth of things yesterday, and got caught.Luckily for her, they didn't call the cops, but they are making her pay the ammount of what she stole every week for a month.

so 104+104+104+104=416

She had told me that she had stolen things in the past just about.... One day before this happened. I told her not to steal anymore, because soon something bad will become of it.

Me aspiring to be a cop in the future and all.

Adding more text tomorrow

AMTT

ps, >>175 & >>177

sorry to keep you waiting.






-Zorli

I guess I'll post here regardless.

I'm just using this site as a stress reliever now.

Not bothering anybody right?

I'll post here every now and then.

Thank you, anyone who may help with whatever.

Much love.


-Zorli

! messed up. But if anyone really verify checks, yes. That was me.

Aha.

-Zorli

>>183 You're not a bother. Please post whatever you feel like sharing with us.

>>181 It worries me that (only) Orange seems to be left inside your brain. Are you alright now? Has he resurfaced again? Hang in there.

>>182 Sounds like Cracker also has it tough. I hope that you'll be able to support her in the way she needs it. And it would be nice if you could persuade her to stop stealing.

>>181 So, what happened between Cracker and iONS after that? Did they meet up at Cracker's place?

Woah Dude! YOU ARE TOTALLY COOL!!
though the orange dude sounds scary...
I don't think I can ever look at an orange the same way again...
As for f*cked up stories I probably have one
It's kinda annoying to write so I'll just stick with a few things
I have personalities..and they...bring me pain
they don't look out for me or anything...they hurt me
and break me down
And I DO have a personality like Orange but..a bit less violent since I went into a serious shock after smashing a fellow classmates' head with a chair...when I was 5...*depressed*
he still has stitches on his head...
My life is like a stupid drama play which is probably why I'm pretty good at acting
My personalities all contradict each other
and now I'm having trouble remembering things (except the smash head incident) and yeah...I have headaches..I don't talk with them but...well because of that
I discarded my feelings and stuff..which is why I normally come off as insensitive.
Each of my personalities are grouped bad and good
and there is more of the bad than the good
...but I'm still scared of teachers...which is actually hilarious
aahhh....I think I'll end up telling everything...
Well..I lost my REAL SELF..I lost my TRUE SELF..
And well even with my family
I know deep in somewhere I love them like my life but...
I can't..connect with them
They don't get me and I don't get them
It's kinda sad
And well I tend to give up a lot
which I use as a tool to make myself cry once in a while cause I've forgotten how to cry
When I cry...Well..I feel like I might as well as kill myself

There is one personality that protects me
It's like the personality or well...it'd be more exact to say security guard.
A very very very strong security guard that causes the shift in my personalities according to the situation
It's like these personalities create a whole system
A system that is not visible just like the soul isn't.
And uhh..I'm not much of a help to anyone
I'm a coward..and I can't hit people..unless I'm pushed to my limit
Someone hits me or does something I just stand there taking it all in and creating a personality to that..a new layer
And I'm like trying to open the chest that holds my TRUE self
to blast all the others away. To go back to my former awesome self
but it's really impossible
I might give up anyday and be consumed by these "protective" personalities

Well sorry for being a bother but seriously! that actually kinda...made me feel better y'know!

http://sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.com/2011/07/angel-number-226.html?m=1

Something I found about #226 I don't know
To me the number 226 has always been a number of revelation, of hope, maybe bad things happen when that number appears, but maybe those situations happen so that you hope. Hope for better things to come, for you and all around you, maybe the number is there to tell you to have hope in the tough moments of life.

D.I.D. is a thing that can be hard to live with depending on the situation, but I believe you can make things work. You're an extraordinary person Zorli, with an extraordinary mind. I know you are able to do anything you put your mind to.

I made peace with the others in this house and made things work, for the most part I think, I still gotta look out for him sometimes but he's learned and grown so much, we keep each other company and we help each other out. I don't know if this helps you or not but I feel I can relate. Keep on being awesome.

-The Nameless-

dude, i also have another personalities. well i only have one i call it satan, he's like a brother to me though

I think that's my ! Code?

Oh well.

I just wanted to say that even though I'm leaving on a little cliff hanger with the iONS arc, but I'm going to (and have been) spending time writing a fictional book, roughly on this whole grand event and events passed (including the unfinished iONS arc)

I'll be using alias names (that you guys will guess) and I hope you like the finished product.

I'm hoping that I'll be done by 2020 latest.

Even if I fail to publish it, I'll post it somewhere on tumblr. (I'll leave the link another day)





"There is a door that everyone will encounter. Open and reap, or walk on and wonder."


Thank you dollars.

I'll see you soon.

I'm fucking done having to deal with their damn bullshit.They can just fucking die for all I care.Fucking being here is an annoyance.I'm fucking done now, it won't matter to them, even the slightest bit, if I shut myself up.It never matter to them if I were here to begin with.

.

how it all ended? :c

This is all very interesting! *_* Personally I don't know if I too have D.I.D because who can say for sure that I'm just making stuff up for myself?

I wrestled a teddy bear once. I lost :(. The end.

>>1

Wow that has got to be the most interesting thing I've ever read half through of. I cant continue because of how emotional it makes me. My eyes are still tearing up as I write this.

Holy shit. Is this thread still relevant??
I remember being on this a couple years ago.
I never chimed in with my 2 cents, but it was really interesting to read.
Guess I have a bit to catch up on.

Can i just say that you must be a really strong person, i would of gone bat shit crazy i can barely stand the voices already in my head, i wouldn't be able to handle having different personalities like that! xx

this happens whenever i try to imagine some sort of situation: i make a mistake in my imagination (like i imagine something that doesn't fit with whatever story / plot / setup i'm creating) and then when i try to fix it (by reimagining that specific part in the way i want it to go) the mistake moment just keeps repeating itself over and over and over. it gets really annoying. my only solution so far (and this only works sometimes) is to just yell SHUT UP repeatedly and really loudly in my mind. this usually gets it to stop, but not always.

another weird thing that has happened recently (as of a few moths ago, and btw this is unrelated to the repetition problem) is that i've stopped dreaming. like completely. by dream i mean something that i didn't consciously come up with myself. i daydream a ton but that's all dreams that i have control over. this is kinda off-topic but i hear tons of stuff about dreaming in color being cool or special or a sign of something. does anyone here NOT dream in color? excepting people who are either blind (in which case they probably wouldn't be on this site in any case) and completely color blind people.

btw do you think having voices in your head could help with indecision? and would it even be possible to purposefully develop one?

also ik this is kinda a weird question, but was anything in this post offensive to anyone? i'm trying not to be offensive, but i'm usually interested in things (especially mental) that other ppl would be offended by (this is just a guess based on other reactions i've seen to stuff like this). i'm still kinda trying to figure out what's acceptable and what's not. so pls just tell me if you spot anything.

Kinda fucked up and funny story. Ok, so this dude I once hung out with for drinks sometimes told he was going to be one of thouse transgender because he said he just felt more happy with it. So I laughed because I thought it was a sick ass joke but no he was for real. So having known that, I had to renounce my friendship with him because I feel like I don't know this guy anymore, and I don't want to because he is now kinda like a sicko in my mind. I thought was lame having to see him at work after that but as long as we got our jobs done I could work with him, and he understood that. Now when I look back I think to myself "well I still would not be friends with him, but I do feel like I owe him an apology". And I do because I was a dick to him and him being that way was not a good reason to resent him. So what I figured our now is, that kind of thing just makes you a weirdo, but it doesn't make you scum. And being weird is just something we all do in our own way, so stop the hate.

Wow is this thread still relevant? Mr zorli, your story is really really amazing, especially how you can survive all these and come out stronger. I probably wouldn't last a day. I really hope you will update someday and I will buy your book! Definitely!

ı read this thread in what 3 hours? without doing anything else and now ı want to hug you ( as a friend off course ) if you ever come to turkey and want to meet me in person ( because ı want to meet you ) please say ı really love your stong personality if this all had happened to me ı would be an emo and problaby kill myself any way please write a book bevcause ı would do anything to buy it

If you write a book, please please please please please please tell us the name!!!

I just finished reading this thread. I don't think I need to explain further since everyone knows what it's like by now. Woah.

I found one from a while back. It seemed so messed up I decided to link it:

http://dollars-bbs.org/personal/res/1490983400.html

Idk man your story sounds kinda wack. It's probably because of watching to much anime. Seinfeld is a goody, go try that out.

i likd types of po\eople who are like you. its like youre having more than one friend at a time. i was once in contact with one of my friend s2 years ago, shewas like you. i feel happy though, but youre alwayswelcome. ^_^

hey mister 707, are you into mystic messenger ? ^_^ it has been so popularlately.

got gangbanged(literally by a gang) when i was 15. lucky i didn't get prego