I was plain stupid in high school that I wanted to create a new identity in college. But now in my second year, I think I'm becoming irritating. I can't help it. For 11 years I was sheltered in an all girl's school where I never had any guy friends or talked to people from a different batch. So I tried my best to make friends, but I might be overdoing it. I am not naturally friendly, so what do I do? I can not slip back to being an introvert emo when I have made a lot of connections already, but the social life is tiring me out because people expect too much. Putting different masks is so hard, and sometimes, I think I wear the wrong mask. I don't want people to think negatively about me, but what can I do when I don't know how to act? I want to fit into society but I do not know how. Thanks fellow Dollars!!!

>>1 Stop being so damn concerned with outward appearances and the status quo. Shit, that's the damn problem. If you act like yourself, then eventually you'll end up hanging out with people similar to you.

@Crisis So hard when it's your own mother telling you that the you now sucks. Identity crisis :( I'm starting to doubt everything. Maybe that's why I like it here in the Dollars where I can keep remaining anonymous...

>>1 Look, Iv'e had a few mishaps with parents thinking you're an idiot, or you suck at everything...But eventually, I showed who I really was...And no one decided to be a dick to me. Just be yourself, It'll all work out eventually. Good luck!

>>3 I've been there. I know what I'm talking about. Just be you and don't give a fuck what anyone else says.

Firstly I am in college and only have a few friends. Also I am still an introvert, and most people piss me off. The only people you should have another face for is your supervisor, or teachers. Just be your self and just do what you want to do, not what others want you to do.

Thanks thanks! Maybe you are right! ~~ putting the mask only in front of the teachers seems like a good alternative ~~ Right on the spot, I'll take your suggestions, be myself and not give a fuck about what others say~~

>>6
But she isn't putting a face on for others, she is doing it for herself.

Well, the results are the most important thing in this world. People don't give a damn as to why things happen, or why someone does something. Sometimes, reason's got nothing to do with it. Which is my problem because I act on reason. Exactly the problem in this world, where people only think that what is seen is the truth. They don't ask for a reason so that they can understand. They ask for a reason to try to rebut you. Society is so twisted. It wants you to fit in with its god damned norms which people of long ago built! Everything is suppose to be relative, but no~ They label you and cast you aside, until you start acting like your label, then they continue to cast you aside! I don't want a communistic style of living but everyone is so judgmental. Bullshit the line "Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder." Makes me wonder why there are beauty contest! And who dictates what is and what is not?! The labels of society! :( wtf. Society is so demanding.

the world is twisted and there is alot to blame towards but don't let what the world does effect you, personally I live with my morals and rules that I set up or I go with the flow sometimes. Be yourself and be independent I say

>>10 My sister and I think that our mom is a social climber like person. But yeah, we are pretty well to do but I don't want to be like her! She insist that I do, maybe because I am her first born, to the point that we would go on arguments about what clothes I wear. I want to live freely and independently, but I live in a very traditional country that respects family and society norms. She pushes me to fit in, and I do try, but its not working out nicely. Not with this proud mindset of mine that is full of ideas taken from every possible fiction around. I do want to be independent, but I don't want to be hated. But I am way too aggressive and way too outspoken as a girl of this society. I know that, that is why I seclude myself. Then they invite me into society then hate me for not fitting in?! I'm firstborn, and in college, so I can't really go prancing around as I like with so much expectations pinned on me and all that. Something like Hiccup from how to train your dragon. But I doubt that something as big as a dragon will come to my life and change the mindset of those around me. O.o Thanks though. I'll try living for myself! :)

I understand exceptions when one is the oldest, cuz I'm the oldest in my family and the first born too. Yes that is a pretty trouble some issue when one is trying to amount physical and social things, cuz it strays one sight from what really matters. I really don't care for social things then again I really don't care for a lot of things, I can now say this I really don't care what happens to me as long as those whom I care are okay.

Let's live in the fiction world where every sob story has a good ending! Where even if you live by your rules, the audience just adores you! Where the audience loves everyone, from the main character down to the villain (with the exception of crappy characters.) Where you have an awesome life and everything is an adventurous twist and turn!!! Where life is not a bore, where everything is possible!

Just work towards the goal of moving the hell out of there if nothing else works. I know some people aren't accepting and things like that can spread. If you want to be yourself and those around you don't care for the way you are, you can't stay there. But if you're willing to compromise and change just to appeal them... Well, I really only see those wo options.

You know no matter how many people out there dont accept u there will always be someone who will. We are alike i also wear a mask like most people. But i decided to stop wearing it. As soon as i stoped wearing a person came intoy life. She understands me and i understand her. We dont hang out much but when we need to talk we do. I still wear a mask infront a lot of people bbut when i get tired of it i start talking to her. I'm going to start a new life with new people and i decided to show my true self to everyone and stop caring if they'll accept me or not. My point is that there will always be one or many people that will be able to understand you but you have to show your true self to them first. Hope this helps.

@Helel your sarcasm its really up front I like it, thou I would probably wouldn't like to live in that cuz that may be a bore, being the same. I take my mask off when I'm alone by myself even with my own family I were a mask cuz I have trust issues.

I have the same problem as well so what? just act like yourself I'm sure your school and class is big enough to have a person or two that match your personality.

>>15 i know, except that I had to part ways with those kind of people. I know but...

>>16 people here don't like sarcasm. and they certainly don't like pessimist who is also an optimist, or a sadist who has hopes for the world. >>>17 and >>16 they say fingerprints never match. There's no effing way that I'll buy that. So I'll say, no two music players ever match, and no two wardrobes are exactly the same. Except that people always show what they have in common and all fads and whatnots. Everybody wants to be in so they hide their differences. Well, maybe people in collage are all damn the same for me. It's not like gradeschool and highschool where you grow up together. There's nobody here like my HS group. besides, people don't expect you to act like yourself in college. They expect you to be smart and legal and very much like everyone. You have to fit in, else, you'll flunk. Like hell will anyone take you in groups if you don't fit in. College will be hard for the lone wanderer, well, in this place I mean.

So yeah, I guess my problem is that I WANT TO BE IN, BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE THE SAME WITH EVERYONE. I don't think it's all about LIVE FOR MYSELF, because in order to land a good job/business, I need to work my way with a hell lot of boring people. Having an attitude only works for real divas and superstars. Sometimes reasons can be practical, not emotional.

You seem to be like me very much so if you ever need to talk with somebody I go by the name Taichi and I have a green avatar in the chatroom and i'll always be ready to hear u out :)

I have the same problem.

Do you really want to know? Don't try to please them. It doesn't fucking matter what they think. Be yourself and you will eventually find someone who enjoys talking to you for who you are and isn't stressful. You don't have to worry about hurting stupid people by becoming an introvert again. Do whatever the fuck you want to do, aside from common morals such as murder, rape, stealing, etc.

>>19 yeah, I'll do that. Hopefully we meet sometime, but maybe we live in different time zones so.... :)

>>20 ever learned the hero cycle? it's a cycle that prevails in most fiction stuff. you'll enjoy it, I guess. You'll get my point once you see it.

>>21 hopefully everyone is as blunt and real as they are when they are anonymous on the internet, don't cha? I enjoy this real conversations of ours than fake convos of the society.

Honestly, I think that you should just be yourself. I know, cliched response, but it's true. I "faked" my way through middle and high school and oh boy, it was probably the most depressing time of my life. So, even if you don't want people to dislike you or whatever, you'd probably want people to like YOU. I mean, all my mid/high school buddies hate the fuck outta me cause I'm honest and I'm not really all hush-hush about things, so hey screw them. It's not like they're the only people in the world. So, if you be yourself, you can find people who'll like you for you, and you don't have to fake it all the time.

When I way, oh, about nine years old, I was evicted rom my wonderful double-storey house in a peaceful area of eastern Victoria. I had been a very quiet, not too smart girl with no bravery whatsoever.
I went to live with my grandmother in the CBD, and went to one of the roughest schools I've ever seen. I went through a massive personality change - from the timid, weak little girl to the brave, strong (yet still very short) leader of the group.
A year later, I moved again, this time far out in the western area of Victoria. I toughened myself up even more - and smartened up. All As in academic subjects, but still lacking in PE (I almost failed one year). On top of that, I became an uber-nerd who speaks in Russian and German from time to time.
From there, I went to highschool, and I'm still here. Same weirdness and otaku-ish ways, still scary as fuck.
Personally, I LOVE changing personalities! It's so fun, gouging what people think of you one way, and what they think of another!

If you want my opinion, just be yourself. It may be a common answer but it's also one of the best. If a person can't respect the real you than what's the point in having them as a friend? If they don't respect you than they will just bring you down.

I don't know why, but at times, I adapt the attitudes of the character I liked best in the last thing I read/saw. Comes with being a writer I guess. Gets?

>>26 Thats something I tend to do as well. Ever since I started watching anime more heavily, my personality changed quite a bit. About 4 years ago, I was the kind of kid who wanted to shoot things, who wanted to beat the crap out of people, to fight. Now i'm a pacifist who longs for a world without war, a peaceful world. Though I disregard some pacifist qualities and will fight if absolutely necessary or under certain circumstances, such as to protect my family or friends. And while I still wanna punch people some times, I can more easily restrain myself than I could before(which resulted in 2 fights with the same person) I owe this to anime, namely Code Geass and Gundam(SEED, SEED Destiny, and 00 respectively). The personality I have now is based on a mixture of characters such as Lelouch vi Brittania, Kira Yamato, Shiro Emiya, and others who I have probably forgotten. As far as something in general goes, i'd say Persona 4 helped me to realize alot of things about myself and acknowledge those flaws(which has all been in the last 3 months.), accepting myself for who I was instead of trying to mask certain things(Being an anime otaku).

So really, wall of text aside, sorry got carried away, adapting the attitudes of certain characters can actually be a good thing. If you adapt them easily enough, then really, it is apart of your true personality, so I see no harm in it, as long as you don't adopt the traits of a psychotic or evil character.