I got this idea from a different thread (What women want.) and figured it's about time I ask my question. I know that all guys are different, so I'm hoping to get a lot of different responses.

Okay, so there's this guy I have a huge crush on. I'm not shy or nervous around him, and I feel like he's the only person I can be myself too. It's obvious to everyone that like him, and most of my friends think we'd be a cute couple. He doesn't judge me based on what other people say, and most of his friends hate me, but he's still nice to me. The way I see him, he's a perfect guy. He has none of those qualities that I always thought made a "perfect guy", but I still think he's perfect. Here's a list of qualities that I like about him,


-He can make me laugh.
-He doesn't judge me based on what his friends think (His friends hate me, but he's still nice to me.).
-He's smart.
-If someone talks bad about me behind my back, he won't come up and say, "Hey! You'll never guess what Bob said about you! He says you're a bitch and your loud."
-He doesn't argue with me (He argues with pretty much everyone.).
-He's a gentleman (Holding open doors, Letting a girl wait in front of a place while he takes the car around, He helped me up and down curbs when I was wearing high -heels.)
-He doesn't insult me (Even as a joke and even if I think it's true.).
-He lets me borrow his jacket.

I asked him what he thinks about me and he said (word for word), "I like you as a friend, and I think you're cute, but I don't know if I like you romantically. I just don't know you on that level is all."

He's probably the best friend to me (He took me to prom because I wouldn't have gone if I didn't at least have a friend to go with, and I was sad about it.), and I see hims as my only true friend.

I have a problem though. We are both moving away in a couple of months. I have his number and we both have a skype, so we'll keep in touch, but I've seen a relationship for 2 years break simply because one of them moved away.

I have a few questions for you now.
1) What do guys want in a girl?
2) Should I continue to chase him or move on?

There is another guy who has a huge crush on me and wants to move to where I'm going, but I'm scared that I'm just flirting with him because of the pain I feel for the guy I like. I don't really see anything in the guy that likes me. So here's a third question.

3) Should I give this guy a shot?

3. No. If you don't like him, don't go out with him. You're just going to end up both (if not just him) getting hurt in the end.

HOLY SHIT A THREAD WHERE MY MANRY OPINIONS ARE RELEVANT :D

1) It varies from guy to guy. Take the answers to this with a grain of salt, and realize that we're all biased towards different things.

Personality: Be supportive of the guy's decisions. If it feels forced, then I won't be happy with the relationship. I don't mind clinginess to a certain degree (as I don't see much human contact, it doesn't bother me as much), but most guys will hate that, so give them some space. Be interested! I hate it when girls are passive about my interests - it shows me that they don't really care much at all, and it immediate turns me away entirely. That interest also makes good grounds for bonding, as I enjoy talking about what I like to do and teaching people about it. I would absolutely love to teach a love interest about what I do, it would let us be closer and my words would no longer be absolute gibberish.

Looks: I don't care what anybody says, looks DO count. I'm not trying to be shallow, but that's honestly how almost every male is programmed. This is very biased though, as each guy has his own weird preferences. I like girls that are smaller than me, which I assume is because I'm not exactly a large person. Still can't decide if it's a genetic dominance thing (I'm fairly certain my dad has a complex about that), or a protective thing. Whichever it is, that's my preference.

2) Depends. If you're both still in high school and you're moving away, it's going to be extremely difficult to form a relationship. One of the key points (in my experiences) is being able to see the person at least once a week, and that may not be possible if neither one of you can drive or is not committed enough to do that. I had one really solid relationship where we could see one another often for a good long while, but that time became more and more scarce, leading to us both feeling a bit detached. It didn't end in an ugly fashion either, so this experience came with a clear mind. Long distance is possible, but you will want to organize some way to see each other.

3) Noooope. Don't ever EVER try to finnaggle two people at once - it almost always ends in disaster, even if it's tame. I pretty much wholeheartedly agree with Bambi on this one, it's nothing but a trainwreck doomed to happen. Try to keep your interests down to one person at a time, and allow yourself time to move on from person A before looking into developing a relationship with someone else.

That'll be the end of my ranting for now ^_^

3.I agree with both of the persons above me. Don't date someone if you don't like them. Not only is it poinless, but it will also most probably end in either or both of you getting hurt.

2.It depends entierly on how you feel and if (as Reilyx said) you will have the oppertunity to meet with him. However, I think it is probably possible to stay good friends even if you're far away (have a friend that's been on the other side of the earth since januari this year).

>>3 Wow. I never thought of the possibility that it might be genetical that the guy wants to protect the girl and therefore wants them to be shorter. Hm, interessting...

Guys want women to mean what they say. I mean if you say something is no big deal, we assume it's no big deal. We take everything you say at face value, unless it's obviously sarcastic. Be straight with us. If something's wrong and we ask what it is, don't say "if you really cared, you's know what was wrong". For the love of god, we do care, that's why we're asking for christs' sake.

>>4 It's easier to protect the girl if we're taller. For example, to protect you, I may wrap my body around you as a shield. If I'm taller, I can protect more of you, lessening the risk of you getting injured, but if I'm shorter, the risk of you getting hurt is greater.

Sandwiches.

>>7 Old joke is old.

On a serious note, each guy is different and they have their own ideas of what the "perfect woman" is.

Don't chase after something you can't catch. It takes up more time than it's worth.

No. If you don't like him do not get involved with him.

>>8 I wasn't joking. I love when my lady makes me sandwiches.

>>10 I sense chauvanism?

Then again, I like it when either gender makes me a sandwich. I mean, com'on. Food is food.

>>11>>12 Sandwiches are good, bro.

No, there is no chauvinism at all.
I just actually like Reubens and my lady friend just so happens to make the best.
It's no chauvinism, it's coexistence.
She makes me sandwiches, I make her soup.

>>13
Fuck your Soup. :P

>>9 I know that each guy has his own opinion. The point of this thread is to get each guy's different opinion. Guys in general don't like me. The guy I like is the firstto even be my friend for a better reason than wanting to go out with me because I'm hot. (Three guys wanted to be my friends for that reason.) Other than that I haven't had any guy friends.

Even though I don't know what I want, fuck it, commenting anyways.

1) Based off the people I know, I can say that there is an overwhelming trend of guys liking it when females are rather blunt and to the point. Sure, be elegant and flowery if you want to, but balance it out a bit - as a group we usually can't be arsed seeing through layers of meaning to get to the point. Also tying into this, honesty. For example, we don't like doing little dances of "That looks so good on you! (but really it looks like you're wearing a potato sack)", we just flat-out say "You look like shit" (in more or less elegant ways). Just be sure to say exactly what you mean, and you should be fine.

Also, have well-formed opinions. Men don't go for flat 2D cutouts unless they're looking for one-night stands or are from /a/, so prove that you have a brain and can use it. There's plenty of airheads around, so you might as well stand out from the crowd.

Relationships often work both ways, so be sure that you can pay attention to his interests (and likewise make sure he can pay attention to yours). Having common ground is something that strengthens relationships and it could lead to you learning something new and interesting.

FOOD. I'm not kidding here, food is a ridiculously good bonding tool. If you're actually interested in a guy, find out what he likes, cook it for a lunch or snack or something, and give it to him or share it with him. Make sure that you say that you made it for/because of him, guys are a bit thick and might miss that connection :V If you're lucky the guy might be able to cook and will return the gesture.

Unfortunately, reilyx is right in that looks play a factor too. Everyone has different preferences/fetishes/opinions, and frankly it isn't worth your time trying to change yourself to appeal to whatever it is that said guy is into. Just go with whatever feels natural - although what I can say is that a common pitfall seems to be having too much makeup. Minimal/light use of makeup works well, men in general don't like it when your face looks like it's been in a bowl of flour or icing.

2) Frankly, I know jack-all about this and have no reference-points either, so I can't help here.

3) FUCK NO. Why the hell would you give a guy a shot that you aren't even really interested in? At best it's you being stupid if you do, at worst it's you wanting to play with him like a toy. Either way, he's going to get hurt and you might get a bad reputation from it if that matters at all.

Well, what I want from a woman, she has to be able to enjoy life, she needs to be smart, or at least capable of handling me mind and personality well. Definitely needs to be into video games and anime, I want someone that is as much my partner as my lover.

So, what I'm getting from the majority of what a guy wants is smart, looks good, light make-up (I hear that a lot), cooking, and straight forward?

I figured I'd get the other two answers, but I had to confirm it. Thank you all for our opinions! I still want to here what men like in women though.

lawl...

....cooking..

Here are a few things that the vast majority of guys want in a woman.

1. Simplicity. Don't say one thing and mean something else, it drives us mad.

2. Understanding: Get that we're guys, and when we're with our friends, we feel that we're entitled to do stupid shit.Bear with us.

3. Space: Exactly how much space varies from guy to guy, but we want to be able to go out with friends without you asking where we're going,who's going with us, how long we'll be there, what we're doing, and the answer to the meaning of life.

>>18 Pretty much.
However, I don't want a woman who is stuck in "gender roles." She better let me cook, and wear dresses, and ogle the boys at the pool.

I want a woman that won't doesn't give me directions like I'm a blind man in a mine field. I know what I'm doing dammit.

I want a woman that doesn't shake like a goddamn fish in bed.

I want a woman that won't try to take command over me like I'm some slave that would die without her.

>>22 lol

^

I want a girl who is completely straight forward with me. shouldn't have to ask you 15 times before you tell me whats bothering you.

Also someone who doesn't let their emotions control them. I dated a girl who literally had no control over them, like she was either happy or sad, and when she was in a bad mood, she would be a total bitch.

She should have at least a mild sense of humor, but most people do so I tend not to worry about that as much.

Understanding is the last thing I want. Someone who can see past my flaws and still love me for me.

JOIN THE DARKNESS! ALL YOU'RE PROBLEMS WILL BE FIXED!

everytime.

>>1 first off let me say aaaaaaaaaaawwww. so sad :(
now, back on topic
1) personally, I look for a girl who is interested in my hobbies and such, a positive attitude, very straight forward and very accepting (i have issues)
2) this is a really tough one. You never know what might happen. You might end up living a bit closer together. You might not. hard to say what you should do. Sorry.
3) ...Crap. another tough one. I want to say you never know how a person might surprise you, so giving this other guy a shot (at least one date) might not be a bad idea. On the other hand, if you feel it in your heart (i know, cliche) that the first guy is the one for you, then I would recommend trying to keep in touch as best you can and hopefully he'll see how great a person you are and return your feelings.
sorry about all the two sided answers.
oh, and >>27 Shut the F*** up already, it's not funny.

Well I'll tell you what they don't want.

Aids.

Horrible joke aside, the guy you're talking about sounds like a "nice guy". Not sure if he was just being polite, or actually interested in you. A lot of people are ambiguous like that.

1. Move on.

3. No, that's just rude to the other party.

>>5 Exactly!!! Some women say one thing and mean completely the other... anyway...

1) Don't take everything the guy says seriously, I for one tend to be cruelly sarcastic at times. Girls get hurt a lot of times because of that and the guy might not even know; thats what it is in my case at least. Which leads to the second thing, be honest; if the guy says something to your that you didn't necessarily appreciate, tell him. This one may be simple, but just inquire about how their day is going; it shows you really care, even if you don't think it does. He won't tell you, so you gotta ask. Also, as I've seen stated in earlier posts, we are extremely dense at times, so don't be scared to be blunt.

2) If you feel that that is what you want to do, then go for it; there are various ways that you can further your relationship even over Skype. For instance, have a "movie night" every friday or whatever day that a show you both enjoy is on and watch it while Skyping one another so that you can discuss developments in the show or characters of the movie while watching it "together". My cousin tried this with his own girlfriend when they went to separate universities last year and it worked out extremely well for the both of them.

3) No, if you have no interest, what's the point? While people say it'd hurt you both, it would hurt him more than you if he figures out that you don't truly like him, not only emotionally, but that's also a huge blow to his pride, you have to understand that.

Good Luck :)

the guy your talking about sounds like me. you couldnt tell by looking at me (i look like a brute) but i am a good gentlemen. i agree with most of the comments said. i like girls who are smaller then me so i can protect them better. i like a girl who is straight forward and will tell me what she wants to say when i ask if somethings wrong. i like a girl who is honest and loving. i like a girl who is clingy to a certain extent. i like a girl who will see my flaws tell me i SHOULD fix them but wont force me to. Looks sadly do count....to a certain extent once again. I like a girl i can show off to my friends and say "HA my girl is the most beautiful girl you've ever layed eyes on and dont you bloody forget it" it makes me happy when i can show her to the world. i like a girl who can cook definetly, and who will cook with me when i do it too. and finally i like a girl who likes anime and video games course thats not manditory but it does help with bonding pretty well

Give the guy who actually likes you a shot. For the longest time, I had a crush on a guy who was moving two hours away. But then, I saw this other guy liked me and I started to become closer to him. And now, we're together! And I can relate to the friends thing- Anubis wants to hit one of my friend with a car, and so do alot of my other friends. I don't like that friend romantically, but it does sound similar

1. smile a lot
2. be a nice person. to everyone!
3. look like you're always looking for him

you may also want to know why his friends hate you. they're his friends, after all

always act like you care!

Caveat to Hiruma's suggestions:

Make eye contact. A lot.

As a guy, and a veteran of the dating scene for about ten years or so, this is my personal advice to you: Start sending him two way signals like making eye contact from across a room, or when he is engaged in conversation. Count how many times he holds your stare, or smiles when he sees you looking at him. Chances are if you are able to do this multiple times in one setting, he is interested.

Now, in regards to chasing this guy even though he is moving away: Again, in my experience, while long distance relationships may last a bit, they will never last forever. And if they do last, and you are eventually reunited, you will feel like you have to get to know that person all over again. I am sure that many people here still believe in 'true love' or "love can overcome all obstacles", but as you get older, that romantic side tends to die a bit. I draw this personal experience from what I would call THE toughest long distance situation ever: a combat deployment to Afghanistan. I kept a beautiful girl that I had been dating for two years prior to my mobilization to OEF on a hook for a year while I was deployed. Communication is tantamount to long distance relationships, and there were weeks that would pass without me being able to speak to her. When I returned, she said that she was scared and that I had become cold. We broke off the relationship shortly before I was Honorably Discharged. Three years down the drain.

Long distance at your own risk.