I'm in 7th grade and the guy I like is in 9th(3 years older,2 school years apart) I've seen him in hallway alot lately ever since half way through the school year. I feel like we are meant for each other but I know NOTHING about him other then he takes German during sixth period in my home room. I was thinking to write a note that said "I like a guy in your class. He has blonde hair covering both his eyes....*more details*....please write his name on the line provided below and put it back where you found it" and put it underneath my desk after 5th period so that after 6th period I can go retrieve it. It may sound creepy but I'm desperate T^T...do any of you fellow dollars know how I can learn more about him....for starters his name?

**btw he's not one of those popular,loud guys and he's usually walking by himself in the hallway or with 2 other people in his class

Yes it is wrong

Mmm.... no, but not recommended. To much of an age difference

>>3 Three years is a big age difference? Since when?

That aside, this sounds like a really bad idea in general. The fact you know nothing about him aside from a single class he takes, yet believe him to be your soul mate or something like that, is slightly unnerving to say the least. If you want to get to know someone, talk to them instead of leaving some creepy note for a random person to find just to learn the guy's name.

There's nothing wrong with you liking someone who's a little older than you. Three years really isn't that much. If it was six or more then I could see the concern but overall it's fine to have a crush on someone older. But I don't believe you should do the whole note thing. I mean if you really don't know anything about him other than his class then you might want to avoid that. What you could do (if you're not a shy person) is try to talk with him. The next time you see him just say hello to him or wave at him. Start a conversation with him whenever you can. Even if he isn't what you thought he would be or even if the two of you don't end up together at least you'll be able to get to know this boy. And who knows there might be a reason as to why you like him so much or he could be end up being a good friend. And again even if he isn't what you thought he would be there will be other guys. Maybe not now but someday you'll find someone you really like and who'll like you back. I can only wish you the best of luck.

>>4 would you want your daughter going out with someone 3 years older then them at that age? I sure as bloody hell hope not

>>6 I wouldn't care, actually; they're a boy either way.

Personally, I don't think there's any issue with being with someone out of your age group, even with slightly higher age differences. I think it's ridiculous to get caught up on ages if you're both at the same maturity level. However, I think you should only look into it if you're both looking for a long term relationship. If you're just dating around and want to go out with someone because they're hot, then don't bother with it. It'll cause unnecessary drama amongst your family if they're not comfortable with you dating someone a bit older.

At this stage in your life, I think it's stupid to have a relationship with a guy 3 years older than you. Your maturity levels are a lot different.

>>9 Not always. However, I don't think she could tell us their maturity levels. That's something that someone you know well irl has to say. We wouldn't know what the case is.

Not to sound sexist, but it is true that girls tend to mature both emotionally and physically faster than boys. That's why it's not unusual for a girl to want to go out with an older boy. However, they should still be careful to make sure their maturity levels do match; if they don't, they're just going to cause trouble for themselves and everyone else.

>>5 I agreed with this one but to add my own opinion:
1. Maybe you're a bit to young to start dating, the age difference won't be a problem thought if you waited 2 more years or so. But in that span of time you could start being friends with him first.
2. No offense, but I didn't think anyone would feel like they're meant for each other when they know nothing at all about that person (maybe he's your 1st crush?)
3. If you wanna talk to him try:
a. search for one of your friends who know him and when they talked, you join.
b. join the same club as him (people liked to talk with others with the same interest)
c. when he's talking to a teacher, pretend you want to ask the teacher about something, then, ask the teacher what's the boy's name (or something like that)
d. in the canteen, order the same food or drink as he did after he ordered it then start a conversation about it
P.S. : I'm not a consultant so if my tips and suggestions are wrong, pardon me.

too young. trust me, it's stupid to think that at 7th grade you will form a lasting relationship. but if you really "like" said person, than by all means go ahead and blatently ask.

Wait wait wait-You feel that you're meant to be together, yet you know nothing about him?
Dafuq?

That... completely zoomed over my head. Thank you ever so much for pointing that out.
you dont even know the freaking guy, yet your acting like your his soul mate. What drugs are you on?

I would say let it end as a crush. You are too young to be thinking about dating. Also age gaps don't really even out till college. Trust me, I've been attracted to older men my whole life. It isn't until college do they get date able if they are older then you. (and plase take that as you need to be in college too. ex, Freshman in college with senior in college)

Nah. I like a ninth grader and I'm in seventh grade.

Okay, first. Digi-Cru, are you her mother/father? Why do you get to decide that she's too young to date? And.. dude, just ask him. Or, if you're really THAT desperate, evesdrop on his convorsations and wait for one of his friends to say his name.

Honestly, if you nothing about him, though, then, no offence, but you're pretty shallow. If you only like him for his looks and not his personality(since you don't know a single thing about him...) then I really don't think you're "soul mates" or anything...

>>17 I don't want to get into a tiff about this, so I'll end it by saying its a personal belief of mine.

Ok first of all it's completely fine to love someone older. Why the hell should any of use make an age limit for love?
Second; you need to find out more about this guy before you drop the ball on him. If you do confess and he's not what you expected you will get hurt; and it may affect your future relationships. But at the same time love is about risks; and sometimes we just got to say how we feel before it's too late. Love is complicated; I don't truly understand it but I will help as much as I can.
First thing you should do is spend time with him; be a little forceful if you have to. Act in a way that you know he likes (like for instance if you act childish and he like mature girls he won't want to spend much time with you). Now you have to find a way to get close to him. There are two things I can think of that you can do. One is to get to him through his friends; another is to just simply talking with him casually
Example: comment on a book hes reading, ask him if he could help you with your study's.
Then when you feel it's right ask him to hang out with you (use that forceful tactic that I mentioned earlier if you need to). Then on your unofficial date learn more about him. Or you could hang out with him and his friends together. This is just to find out the kind of person he is; how you go about it is all up to you.
Wow I typed too much; i'll leave you to it good luck!

theres nothing wrong with liking someone older but I don't suggest daing some older than you in highschool because it wouldn't really work out well because hes two school years ahead of you s if you look at the bigger picture if you guys did date he would eventually graduate and leave so it wouldn't work out. Plus you are both at different maturity levels and he more than likely would jus try to get in your pants :\ considering hes a guy in highschool who has probably just gone through puberty.

" Why the hell should any of use make an age limit for love?

Pedophilia...

>>22 If the person is old enough to choose who they want as their partner, I don't see the problem. My problem stands with pedophiles who prey on unwilling parties and those under 14. Once you're in that age group, you're getting old enough to choose how you want to live your life and who you want to be with. At that point, why does age matter? Of course, my opinion doesn't matter when it comes to the law, but regarding morals, I don't think there's a problem with it.

It seems a little early to me to like somebody through an age gap like that , but then again it's not a really bad thing. You just have to make sure to keep this possible relationship clean.

>>23 I was only referring to somne like 23 trying to date 14 year old girl.

If their ages are like 30 and 80, and they want to date, then that's their business.

Wait....I never said we were soul mates o.o
When I typed "we are meant for each other" I mean that me & him look good together. Also I do know some stuff about him such as his music taste but that's because he's "emo" and its pretty obvious what kinds of things we like...
And I don't like him for looks...it feels like my brain is attracted like a magnet towards his o_O

It's not wrong, but it sounds like love at first sight bullshit.

"I feel like we are meant for each other but I know NOTHING about him"

....Seriously?

>>27 First of all...thats incredibly rude.

>>1 Thats okay...Its not a matter of right or wrong here. What matters, is if you have the guts to talk to him. If he is older than you (which is actually the most common thing) then, talk to him! Dont just leave yourself hanging!!

>>28 wheres your second of all?
Also, just because its rude doesnt mean its not true

That is rather rude (haha talking back at me. did the same thing in 3rd grade)... and plus, you don't even know him and have never talked to them. How then can you say that you actually like him? to actually like someone is to love them for everything inside, not on the outside. get to know him some more and think about it. he may not seem like what you thought he was. (trust me. ik. i have a friend like u)

>>26 "Also I do know some stuff about him such as his music taste but that's because he's "emo" and its pretty obvious what kinds of things we like..."

If I were that boy, I would have slapped you in the face for that comment. You think he's "emo", and because of that you can tell what he likes? If you've never talked to him, you don't know his real personality, and making assumptions on what he's like by how he dresses and acts at school won't help you get him.

Yes. Because what emo freshman wouldn't want to date an "emo" 13 year old. Because, you know, middle schoolers actually know shit about love, and life, and other important philosophies.

>>32 i cant tell... was that sarcasm?

First thing you do, smile at him. if he smiles back that's a good sign, if he doesn't quit it. anyways if he does smile, comment on something funny or just anything that might strike you, like, "love the hair," or "where'd you buy that thing?" make sure you're interested with that stuff. then start there. when the time comes (you're friends and he gets to like you), confess.

Please make sure that you do actually like each other. and it's not the sake of a relationship.

If he rejects you, have pride. move on. you might find someone better.

lol. in high school i was a sophmore and dated a junior. she was 18 and me 16. so mehhh...i dont see the problem. as long as he treats you right, but idk, maybe i'm a little biased....

cant you just ask one his friends for his name.
Then maybe right a letter to him. you dont have to put your name just tell him to meet you somewhere.

>>33 No, of course it wasn't.

>>31 ...no comment...

It's ok... I suppose.

It really depends. Are you one of those over developed women, or a small girl? If you are over developed (boobs & ass to the max) then you might have a chance.

The scientific equation used by men is:

0.5A+7

Let's say the dude's 14 (young for highschool, but I want to stay away from decimals to preserve simplicity). It would be 0.5(14)+7 which is 14 (it's a bell curve kind of thing. If he was 16 it would be 15). The rule of thumb if you don't want to do the math is don't date more than about 1 year younger. If you are over developed, then he can date 2 years younger.

>>39 What the fuck?

>>39 Not sure if trolling or just really stupid.

>>41 It's not the first time I've heard this. You use half your age, plus seven. Then if they fit the age range either older or younger, dating them is socially acceptable.

For example:
I'm 18. So 9+7= 16. So anyone 16-20 is okay.

>>42 That has nothing to do with a anyone's personal morals. It's bullshit.

>>42 Then just really stupid.

I have to say that it would entirely depend on him. Do I think you might be made fun of? Yes, but that is a danger no matter what you do. I would say that you should try to find out more about him by making a note of what he does. Don't go stalkerish, but notice where he is going, what he is doing, or who he is with when you see him. Also I would suggest, if you can, to try and strike up a conversation with him. See what he is like. If you find that you have a lot of connections you can try and strengthen whatever bonds you have.

>>43 i agree, but I was just saying that he isn't trolling. Several people us this.

>>44King isn't, but that theory is, yes.