I know I should blame myself if I can't change. I know I'm complaining about this, but I don't have anyone to talk to. Everything is my fault if I can't do most things independantly. I know time waits for nobody. I know I'm being close-minded.

Ever since the end of middle school, all my friends have been distant. Each and every one of them start to fade including my family members. I'm slowly losing trust in everybody. The only one I trust is myself.
My heart is living in the past, but my mind is living in the present and future. My mind is based on Logic & Reason while my heart is based Emotion & Moral Philosophy. They are constantly fighting in my head and it's driving my INSANE!!! I just don't know what to do!! I DID talk to my brother about this, but I don't think he cares about my issues. I feel like I'm being neglected by everyone!!
I keep telling myself that "The world isn't as bad as you think," but I'm losing hope. I'm deny my own existence, but that doesn't mean I'm thinking about suicide. Everybody has their own world they created for themselves to live in. I know my world is going to explode someday because of this depression.
I'm horrible when it comes to interacting with people. I'm always dependant which I wish I wasn't. Reality scares my half to death, but my Heart is always my Savior. What can I do to release my stress of emotions? I have a pen and paper (Journal) to write down my stress, but that doesn't mean it disappears. I feel like I'm slowly withering away like a flower.

I'm sorry that I'm complaining about my issues on this thread. I just need some advice to stay positive everyday.

Think of this: "Enjoy the simpler things in life."

>>2 Thanks, but theres no one to "Enjoy the simpler things in life" with. T-T

No i meant you can enjoy them yourself.

Shoot, I'm antisocial at times and yet people see me for me.

You just need to find people who don't mind you for who you are.

>>4 It's hard finding people like that nowadays.. :C

I have a smiliar problem, having moved from america to Germany, all my old friends are distant, and I lost my voice basically sense I can't talk to any of the people at my school properly because they all speak german. I had problems with social interactions before, but now its downright ugly. I have forgotten how to reach out to people and am now an official bystander and It sucks, but i at least got my sister and my family, and of course my old friends online, but I feel really lonely a lot of times. I just hope though That once I speck german it'll pass.
As for your case, I'm just as lost as you are and am trying to figure it out myself. My problem I think is that I never confide in anyone or get up the courage to talk to people, in what little german I know. I wish I could help more... God I suck at this, but I hope that helped at least a little..

Okay!
Dont stress over becoming emotionally distant. Sure worry about it because its a bad thing that can affect your entire development, but dont stress about it overly because thats not going to accomplish anything.
secondly, learn to enjoy your own company, find things to occupy your attention so that you can actually live with not beeing socially active n not go insane.
Thirdly, try n make contant contact with people, family included if it worrys you that much. To them it could be nothing, they may not of even realized it, so take the initiative roll and do something on a regular basis, even if its something small.
Lastly, eat food.

i practily hate myself

>>7 Lol! I'll try do to some of it. And why eat food? XD

>>8 You're not the only one who hates you.

>>1 Stop worrying so much about this,and find things you can enjoy doing alone. Once you're able to enjoy yourself, you'll find people with similar interests, and soon, you'll end up hanging out. It'll just take some time.

>>11 The thing is... This has been going on for about 3-4 years now. I do enjoy doing things alone like draw or listen to music, but it's hard to share the things I like with other people. Perhaps, I am too worried about this situation and need to calm down, but I feel like I'm going to shatter.

Hey Yummy..... I have also my isuues when it comes to social themes...
I even started to be afraid going out or talk about private things an such stuff....

But there is something that helps me out some days... YOu said you are still enjoying to draw things..... ^^ So do I.

When I realized I'm getting lonely... and got annoyad from my existance woth only me by my side.... I forced me to jump over a big shadow : I grabbed pencils and colours and stuff and Paper, put it into my backpack and went out into a café.

Sitting there on a small desk, a little aside in a corner makes me feel comfortable because I can look over the whole place.... And then I order some cofee and just start drawing ...

Here comes the good part: No dutys of the household make you stop drawing, cuz you are out anyways... AND : If you want to talk to people... you got the possible topic right on the table ^^_d And if you don't feel comfortable in a chitchat.... you can just use your 'wall' out of drawing materials to gain distance again ^^

Maybe this might help you a little using the still enjoyable things for your benefit even more ^^

And... Sry 'bout my bad english... ^^''' I'm from Germany and I't s been some years since I left school.... u////u'

and eeeh Kyri! ^^ where in Germany do you life now? Maybe we could meet ^___^

>>13 That sounds like a good idea. Maybe I'll try that sometime. I like to play chess with my brother sometimes at the cafe, too. We also like creating stories and such. Thanks for your advice! C:

@Eizo So there other englisch/deutsch people! Thats weird, I do the same thing at school in germany, I draw or read and sometimes write. I live now in starnberg, but I might move to munic or somewhere else in germany. :D thank you for all the advice!