so there was this girl i know since highschool. she and i meet during a meeting for band, it turns out she and i had a lot in common. we have started to hang out more during the first year of highschool. i did tell her how i felt and she felt the same. i was so close to asking her out when the unexpected came, my parents notice i was acting a little different and we talk about whats going on. i had no choice to tell them and they said no, because i was too young (i was 14 at the time). i didn't know what to do. i had to tell her. she was hurt and i could see it. i said sorry, but it didn't help while at least i thought. over the years i tried to get her back, but it didn't work. our last year at highschool she and i gotten closer and i was label as a brother. it really hurt me and i didn't know what to do. after i graduated i felt my home town for college. now im back and i saw her again, but she is with someone. during highschool i ask her what is it that she doesn't like about me and im clingy to her. we still say hi on FB or text message and saying we should hang and talk.the thing i need to know is, after the years we know each other should i let her go and move on and try to find someone like her?

I say stick with her, keep treating her good, and trying to win her over, and mabey eventually ya'll will end up together, but that doesn't mean put your entire love life on hold for her, go out date other girls, mabey all she needs to see is you with another girl for her emotions to kick in, and if not hey either way you end up with her or another awesome girl

>>2 thanks for the help

>>3 np dude...i speak from personal experience on that one...but you might wanna wait to see if anybody else has some suggestions...they might have an answer you like better...but heh mine worked fine for me

>>4 ok

Um, okay. Been there...kinda, not with the parental issue, but with the situation.
Your best course of action? Let her go for now, but still keep in contact. You have her facebook right? Just be cool with her on there, when you notice she's single again, go for it, what have you got to lose? Fuck I mean, your friendship could probably take a few more bumps considering your history together. But yeah, until then you should try and date other girls, get your mind off of her because brooding over her forever sucks ass. I know, I've been there. Anyway... good luck.

If that shit doesn't work? Naked confession.

I have a question.

"our last year at highschool she and i gotten closer and i was label as a brother. it really hurt me and i didn't know what to do."

That sounds incredibly selfish. If you cared about her, being whatever-zoned shouldn't bother you at all. All that shows is that you're more concerned about getting "with" her than her actual feelings.

And what's more, the fact that she is dating now that she's in college means she took the more mature route than you and moved on. But again, if you really don't want to give up on it, I don't exactly blame you, but you shouldn't go for someone that's already with someone else. That's just bad form.

But keep in touch with her anyway. You make it sound as if you're never going to talk to her again if you decide not to pursue her romantically. And honestly, if you do that, you're a pretty shitty person.

>>6 so i should stay in contact, but don't go for her until the time is right? thanks for the help
>>8 i thought i was able to have a second chance to get with her, because there some events that affected me during high and so i thought that we would try again, but she label me as a brother before i got the chance to talk to her. i do understand her feelings, but i haven't had the chance to talk about it yet. well she's not in college. i'm in college. i don't want to give her up like an old toy, but i do understand that she is with someone. thanks for the help though i do appreciate it

Hell man i tell u way just. Ask her out it may supeiaw u

*surprise

>>9 You're misunderstanding entirely, and probably inadvertently showing your more selfish feelings on the matter through your poor word choice. Pay attention, at least to cover yourself.

You say you understand her feelings, but do you really? You sound obsessed, rather than amorous, which would be completely detrimental to your relationship unless you learned to get over yourself. It's a feeling akin to possessiveness, and you're bound to be wracked with drama one way or another until you realize this.

Maybe she doesn't feel the same way. Is that such a bad thing? It doesn't mean she never will, and even if she doesn't, do you really have to treat it like you lost?
You're still friends with her. Isn't that enough for now? If you let your selfish feelings get ahead of you, you're going to miss out on what could be a great platonic friendship.

What bothers me here is your diction, as I said earlier, though:
"i don't want to give her up like an old toy"

Pardon?

Is that really how you view her? A toy that you're discarding?
I am actually against you getting together with her, if you're treating relationships like this. Consider it from a more equal standpoint, and not from your self-centered point of view, for once.

The situation isn't
"I'm not going to get together with her at this rate..."
it's
"She doesn't seem to have the same feelings for me, even though I do for her."

No matter how much you act like you know it's the latter, you treat it like the former. And that's disgusting. If you really like her, prioritize her feelings over your own, and for god's sake don't angst about it as if she's deliberately hurting you.

>>11 Why bother fixing one mistake out of seven. If you need a whole 'nother post for it, at least fix it all.

Well, stay friends with her. Because if a relationship doesnt work out, then at least youd still have a friendship. They say "try try again," so dude, dont give up on her if you truly love her. But...if she doesnt love you in the same way eventually, let her go. Dont let your love for her ruin your chance of finding true love.

>>14 thanks for the advice