I've been creating a story, in which is being turned into a Manga. Quite professionally done, might I add, and I thought I'd share the story of mine, and get some feed back from you all.

It's located here. http://snafu-comics.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=49479&p=3038131#p3038131

The story mixes many different mythologies together, along with Horror and modern times. It's a Fantasy, Horror, Action, Sci-fi story.

Enjoy.

will read and comment at a later date when I have more time

Props- I've always wanted to take my ideas this far

Thanks a lot.

Sorry for the double post.
If you look for Thiamor over on Deviant Art, you'll also see my story. I've uploaded it onto my DA page.

Bump.

I've updated the story by uploading another deviation of it, as the present. The other was the introduction.

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Here is the second part of it.

http://thiamor.deviantart.com/art/Hellfire-273176816

I've got a lot more ready to be edited in to my story, just haven't got around to doing so, yet.

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http://thiamor.deviantart.com/art/Hellfire-Introduction-194874043

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Share this story and every site posted by me, on other sites if allowed, and with friends, please.

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Hellfire. Oh yeah!

Fucking moron.

Anyway, bump.

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Been adding to the second link's story. Hopefully you all enjoy where it's going.

That's a lot of bumps. Please refrain from bumping unless necessary, i.e., you actually updated.

Please and thank you.

>>34
Who the fuck do you think you are?
No, seriously. We all bump topics, even if not fucking necessary. It keeps the boards active and free from trash. So, don't try to act like some big shot if you know jack shit about how this place runs, Kid.

>>35 And I assume you know how this place runs, Mr. 'Big Shot'? As much as people like to bump topics, it's not exactly great if most, if not all, your posts are bumps. If anything, the bumps are 'trash'. A thread full of bumps isn't what one would call 'active'.

I would be more than happy to oblige keeping the board 'free from trash'. That, of course, would be you.

Please avoid unnecessarily hostile statements.

Please and thank you. u wu

>>34

Hey.

What is this uncalled for faggotry?

The thread isn't hurting anything, and no one's complained about it. For four months. You somehow thought it would be a great idea to come out of nowhere and make a scene out of it?

Four months and less than 36 posts does not constitute "a lot of bumps". It constitutes an occasional bump. Hell, looking at the time frame shows it gets bumped roughly once every other day or so - Which is entirely normal.

This isn't even taking into account when threads need to be bumped just to get permasaged shit off the boards - Something Thiamor does daily, in every board. If he feels like bumping his own thread while getting permasaged things off the front, then that's his own business.

Where the hell do you get off trying to criticize or dictate what he can or can't do in moderation? Bugger off, Kid.

>>36

This is the basic mentality that I hate. Some kid comes on, most likely their first, let's say WEEK on, and decides to spout off their opinion, thinking it's valid if they hadn't even looked at the dates, other topics, or how I post before.

Your opinion doesn't magically become valid just because you speak. You've got to earn your validity, so to speak.
It isn't that hard, either, and you could easily earn it on your first day here.

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Bump sprinkles!!!

Bump.

>>38 yfw Kid isn't new
However, >>37 is right.

>>1 By the way. Thiamor, how did you go about finding an artist for this? My manga-styled art isn't good enough, but I'm curious to do something similar with one of my stories.

Wait, that was a scene? I just saw and thought there was a long line of bumps. His last post was a story update, so that I understand, but I only went "hey, don't bump so much unless it's like an update or something, alright?" This guy thought that instead of handling it in a civil manner and explaining, it was a good idea to go "know your place" etc etc all under the assumption that I'm new, so I defended myself.

Regarding permasaged stuff, I don't really see much of that in the lit board. Bumps here just look like it's trying to draw attention.

... And what's with this "you need to know how I posted before, need to earn your right to say your opinion in a BBS, earn validity to speak (what the fuck) etc etc"? What? Opinions require seniority to be valid now...?

Anyway, yeah, I just said 'don't bump too much unless there's actually an update', don't get your tits in a bunch. There was a two month pause that I didn't really check, yeah, but just felt that it was a bit weird.

>>41
Well what I did was Trial and Error. I just searched Deviant Art while sharing with them, the story, my over all ideas, plans, and HOPE to go they do it. It worked.

When searching, your best bet is to find someone who openly states they want to be a Manga Artist, and also doesn't show in journals or posts, that they do or have open commissions. This is normally a sign of someone who usually takes requests. Which makes it easier to talk to them.

Hope to go=Hope to God.

>>42

No sir. Defending yourself implies you didn't start this faggotry by trying to call him out on something that didn't matter. No justifications will change that - And how Thiamor reacted doesn't change that you both provoked the response and then went on to be an insufferable ass under the pretense of politeness.

There is no excuse. Bugger Off.

... How did I provoke the response with my post and where are you getting this? Just leave it be, 'bugger off' and mind your own business.

I kind of decided to ignore you, but "Mind your own business" implies us not being in a public setting. Which we are in, actually. It's everyone's business.

Back to ignoring. Back to writing stories.

I might read this. If its being made into a manga Thiamor, then you have some serious talent.

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I have updated chapter 1. Like I said, I have a lot of things typed up, but only sharing each chapter with people very slowly.

I do a lot if minor edits to the parts I do upload, anytime inspirations hit me. Every bit makes the story more enjoyable, in my opinion.

Anyway, thinking back on Deadman Wonderland, while reading it's Manga/Watching it's anime (and listening to the full version of the Opening Theme) is what gave me a lot of inspiration today.
I plan to do a lot of edits.

Anyway, here you go.

I'll post the introduction link again, just so you can read up.
Hellfire Introduction

Now here is the part I've edited/added onto today.
Hellfire Chapter 1

Comment on here, to tell me what you think. Follow me on there, if you wish to keep up to date. Favorite it, if you wish.
Enjoy.

Of minor updates. Not IF*

Haha... The Hellfire Rises!

>>55

Kid. Stop being your idiot self. Read the recent links. Don't just post some bullshit about you being a devil, or a God. Stop being You. Stop it now.

Bump.

Dude... it was four threads down, and there wasn't even a saged or dupe above it. Don't bump it unless it's off the page or under a sage.

The FAQ can be bumped when it's beyond five posts, but it's rude to bump a regular thread that much.

>>58 I agree there. There's someone else that regularly bumps his threads daily, and I kind of dislike him for it.

>>59 I disagree there. If the FAQ is bumped up just because it gets five threads down, then there will only be like 2 questions by the time it fills up. I think it should be bumped once it's off of the front page, which is ten threads down.

I just had to find something that I disagree with Barabi on. The funny thing is that it's because of Insert that I disagree with her, which means I would have agreed with her had Insert not brought up the valid point that there should be a good portion of the thread that actually contains questions and answers for the parts that don't make sense.

>>60 Sorry, Lei. Even Insert agrees with me on that. The FAQ needs to be on the top half of the page or dumbfucks won't read it; go read his post in there, because he explains that it's fien to bump it when it's past four or five posts. And it's fine to bump threads daily or even more than daily (if it's on a busy board), but don't bump it when it's not even at the end or off the page. It's just obnoxious.

Bumping is fine, but don't be an asshole and bump it to the top when it's only a few threads down :T

>>61 fine*
Gah. Can't type today.

>>61
Yeah, sorry about that. Wasn't thinking.

>>61 There's people who don't read the FAQ even when it's at the top. Everything on the FAQ is common sense. Stupid people will always be stupid.

THIAMOR! This is your last chance! I got my fucking devil's eye on you, you piece a shit and watch your fucking mouth. My devil father doesn't like that language, it's human-shit! I will not be bullied by you! The Hellfire will rise! [Bane's theme from Dark Knight Rises-Deshi Basara (He Rises)!]

>>65 stupidity alert...

Look who's returned. KILL HIM! OFF WITH HIS HEAD! POOR HOLY WATER ON HIM! THROW A CROSS OR BIBLE A T HIM!

>>65 I think I'll pray for you. Just because I can.

Hey, hey, Legion, hey, hey guess what, I love you...and so does
God.

For the love of God, please keep this bullshit,LEGION, off of my topic.

>>71, Aw, but it's fun.

Back on topic, I do like your story, Thiamor. I remember reading it awhile back.

Anyway, I've added a tad bit more to the story, and some minor edits.

Like...just this minute, I did.

CURSE ALL OF YOU!! I had enough with of this human-shit! Don't treat me like a CHILD! I will kill all of you and God too. I'm Anti-Christian(not a christian), and I'm very unholy. Your country, your friends and your life will end. I'm not insane!

>>75 Your grammar is shittier than a three-year-old's.

unholy (the prefix un- means "not")
therefor you said you're not holy

That doesn't make you evil. I doubt that anyone here is "holy".

This should be the Anti-Religion World! I'm part of the Devil Ancestors(family), I'm the son of the devil and the Devil King in Hell-- and part of the wreckage. Hellfire rises!

>>77 Get your facts straight. There is no"Devil Ancestors" or "Devil Family." There is no "Devil King".

The Devil was once an angel, then became a fallen angel when he tried to become stronger than God and challenge him.

It-was-all-a fuck LIE!!!!!

>>79 Go to Heaven! Your grammar's shit and your don't make sense.

Do I have to fucking contact Reltair, Legion? I mean, one is not THIS stupid. Get this bullshit off of my topic.

Let me spell it out for you.

This. Is. My. Topic. Not. Yours.

Now I'd not feed the kid if it were on any other topic. But this topic is mine, let alone on the fucking Literature board. It's one thing if it's on random (not by much, it's still bullshit.)

Don't you all even know who the hell I am!?


I'm... Hell on Earth's Reckoning!

I said go to Heaven!

>>82
I wouldn't care if you were God living in a fucking can of Chicken Broth. I said to stop fucking around on MY TOPIC.

He would probably be posting less if you wouldn't give him something respond to.

Just sayin'.

It's partially my fault for responding to him, and partially your fault Tmore for making a topic with the word "hell" in it. Then you're biting the bate that he's setting out for you.

MAKE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>>86
Pretty sure this topic has been around since before he joined. Not like I KNEW some moron would be attracted to it.

Your story is becoming a manga? My friend (who is only a teenager, surprisingly) is drawing a manga professionally! He's a great artist. I've seen some if his work.

Oh really? I'm just about to tear your bodies apart including your world and country too! I'm loosing my cool. I'm not crazy. I'll just break you guys into shreads like paper and glass together like the sound of tremor and destruction!

>>90 so funNOT

anyway still nice, Thiamor

>>90 plus also, stop the RP shit.

(((((((((TREMBLING with ANGER!!!)))))))))) [GROANS!] GRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!! *BREAK THE WALL GLASS OF MY TREMOR-TREMOR DEVIL FRUIT!* I'm gonna tilt you guys apart, piece by piece as glass and paper!

>>93 have fun with that, I don't see anything happening.

Who all on here would be willing to help me out on the story? I need creative minds to help bounce ideas back and forth, to break this "Writer's Block" that I have.
I created a DeviantArt group for Hellfire a bit ago, plus a chat-room on DeviantArt for the BBS. So anyone willing to toss ideas around?

bump

Anyway, I've updated the story, and if you can find the indirectly "referenced" part of 'Deadman Wonderland', you win a cookie. Kgo.

http://thiamor.deviantart.com/art/Hellfire-194874043

>>98 Found it and I gotta say this is very intriguing and entertaining.

>>99
Ha, awesome. Glad you like it, and glad you found the reference.
I plan to indirectly reference a lot of manga/anime.
Make fun of Ichigo from Bleach in it, shit like that.

>>100 I also noticed the whole Demonic pressure=Spiritual pressure thing and I have to give you kudos for that, for the manner of description and for the story plot.

>>101
Yeah, I plan to do a lot of stuff like that, and have it actually fit in. Now, actual characters from the stuff I'm referencing shall not be in it. As you know how that'd turn out.

>>102 Cool and yeah I have a feeling of how that'd turn out.

Also I set a goal, a deadline if you will, where I HAVE to get this done. So I'm spitting it up into sections, where it's a new story each, and it follows the previous. I had a lot of stuff typed up, but trashed it, and started it off new little half way into the story.

A group of us figured that we'll get it done, get everything described good, and start a (yes) kickstarter project to help fund it, to get a good Artist for it.

Some people may not agree to it, but it's not like I'm trying to fund my other Documentary Project over on Kickstarter.

>>104 Now I can't wait for you too finis it.

I've added an indirect Hellsing Reference into the story now. Try to find it.

>>106 Is that a challenge I hear? Very well lets see...

>>106 I think I found it. Is it the .454 Casull handgun?

>>108
Yes.

>>109 One thing. Replica? Pfft yeah like the kid's stupid enough to buy that it's a replica.

>>110
Yeah, if you're liking the story, there will be a twist coming after the last room of the building. He relives his past with each room/floor that he visits.

>>111 I have a feeling things are going to get more interesting.

I've updated it again. There is no reference in this new part. Not yet.

But I did foreshadow a few things, that are soon to come.

I do plan to add in a special "breed" of character in this, though.

They are called "Black Brokers" because they have gone to hell, but escaped.

They took over the closest, and easiest body that they could, when coming back to the living realm.
They are the ones who give information to Akumu about various demonic entities around the world. This is because they obtain a huge amount of knowledge from Hell when dying, as well as special "Black Magic" based abilities. Such as being able to fend off, and destroy Demonic Hunters who come to bring them back to Hell as well as a "Mastery" in the 'demonic detecting senses'.

I plan to give them huge rolls in the story. Plus one "major" Black Broker will play a bigger role in the story than the rest.

>>114 So one could assume this one Black Broker would be an ally of Akumus?

>>115
Yes and no.

>>116 Are you saying that it's one of those no specific side type of characters?

I can't say too much on either without having to spoil it.

>>118 Damn it... Now I wanna know more...... Also nice touch with the trap.

I want to force him into situations that he isn't supposed to be in.

Like if he used his powers, he'd not be in this situation. But now that he has to, he'll be in a situation where Hades is pissed off.
A "damned if you do, damned if you don't" type of situation.

Plus I'll spoil one thing. The demon he is chasing, for this section of the story (in Manga/anime, you'd call it an arc) he is the main boss. Everything will lead to an even bigger boss in the ultimate end of the story, though.

Trying to make big, but perfect styled plot twists. One's that are weird, but not enough to run away readers.

>>120 I have to say: I like the way you think Thiamor. I wish i had your creativity... Damn wirters block. Made me quit my project.

Anyway, with the Kickstarter project for Hellfire, I started to plan it out with friends.

The initial funding would basically be split into the following:

1. Money for the Artist.
2. Money to get to Comic-con to sell the copies.
3. Money to rent out a big enough area in Comic-con, to sell copies.
4. Money to ship all of the copies to Comic-con.

>>122
Forgot to mention something.
5. Money to create "said" copies.

>>122 >>123 What ComicCon?

Oh, yeah. My bad.

I plan to go to the San-Diego Comic-con one year for this. Maybe each year for a few years.

Bumping this back on the top.

I've added more to the story just now.

I've added more to the story.

Hellfire

Going to post a little excerpt from Hellfire, just to help give you all a taste of it. Hope you enjoy it.

There were hundreds of pikes surrounding the shrine as if some type of fence row was being raised. Upon each pike was a mutilated body of the surrounding towns. Man, woman, child, elder, dog, cat, and even birds. It mattered not with them.

Sounds very interesting. I like the idea. Keep writing! :)