Hello :) new member here :)

Izaya's my favorite character as I can relate to him the most :3 I hope we all get along!

please take care of me~

izaya ish pretteh amazering =u=b

welcome asura-san :D

hello Asura.!!! welcome to dollars!!! :) I hope we can be good friends,.!! :) take care always.!! God bless.!:)

Find me now, Barabi.
I'm a ghost and a beast.
There is no escape or encounter.
There is only death.
...





PLEASE DON'T :(

This'll be my secret, not my secret to everybody. Confirmed that 3 people now know about that other thread, it's trash.

First post?
I really just wish people on this site would respect me. I don't want to prove anything, or sound intelligent, or really anything other than garner the respect of the members.
That's really it.

Now, it's really important no one finds this.

Things have been picking up, maybe.
I think I have a different idea of respect than most others and so will likely never get my idea of respect from anyone.
Hm.

I think the single biggest benefit for me form this site is meeting people that have vastly different beliefs from me. I haven't been exposed to many people like that, and to a certain degree I can't outside of the Internet. I hope that when I meet someone later in life, I can have a more reasonable discussion with them thanks to the time I spent on this site.

She's slacking.

I even have a more secret thread for another backup. I'm on 4 now. Hoping to change that to something more automated. Can't even find my first?

Diving hasn't been the same since mummy boy left. I was hoping he'd start posting again, to be honest.

I don't think they're a mod, or at least only recently. I've pinned two possibilities.

I saw a couple of threads posted on recently that are not permasaged along the lines of 'mods plz sage this thread'.

Hm. More research time!

>>10 LOL

Too late.
After I reveal this picture, I'm afraid I'm going to delete it.
Too slow!

If I were to describe my personality as viewed by members of this site, it would be

-Stiff
-Illogical
-Presumptuous
-Dry
-Silly

Those are the top five I can think of.

Maybe she'll find this one.

lel.

Was that a big deal?

It didn't seem like a big deal.
Well, maybe I should delete the reply, to be safe.
Of course, not like anyone new is going to see it, so I'm really not sure what is going on.
Maybe now that the circumstances have changed, it means more. I'm also not sure where the housing arrangements ended up.

This is the beginning of the end.

>>14 I think it was just Puck.
Just in case though, I checked the thread again.
No new activity.

I'm kind of perturbed about it.

>>14 It was actually the replies thing.
Which isn't really less odd.
Ah, well.

I will remain, it seems.

She's convinced I'm a girl.

>>17 He's convinced I'm the girl.

>>6 Confirmed for no respect, not a different idea.

I seriously had hoped. Maybe I'm talking to the wrong members.
But, it seems to happen every goddamn time. It's getting very annoying, and it putting me in a position where I can either never discuss anything I disagree with or be on the outside. Is this how it it's going to be all the time, not just on this site? Is there anyone out there like me?

I doubt it, or to be more precise, I doubt those people will present themselves in a manner I can possibly find them.

>>19 No, you fool! It's not that they don't respect you! It's that they don't trust you. That's the issue. There is a lack of trust. There's not much you can do about that except to be careful like you have and stick around.

"I was so happy yesterday night. I was imagining 'So Far Away' by Phaeleh the whole way home, and I jogged home after not sitting for 7 hours! It felt so good. I wasn't that giddy when I was running, I was about to cry actually. But, it felt great! I don't feel like going to bed now. I should have walked home! Running had the opposite effect than what I intended! Feel free to make this into a journal entry, like copy paste. I KNOW, very difficult. I know I am also being spied on. I don't know if it is simple data mining, like searching for words, or if someone has to read every e-mail that gets flagged. But, if someone is reading this now, you have to do something. You can't sit around, doing nothing. You'll never be happy. You can always sit for a little bit, can't ALWAYS be running about doing. But you have to do. I don't know what it is, but I am unimaginably happy every time I come home from a shift at work (dishwasher). I usually go for hours on end, till 12 or 1 or 2. But MAN, I feel so happy I cry at the moon. I looked at the moon and instantly recognized the size of the universe, and the futilit of life. I cried right there, as soon as I saw it. I looked at the surface of the moon as a tear rolled down my cheek. I licked it when it got close enough, on instinct. Then, I started laughing. I thought it was so funny that I did that, like a blooper reel of life, like I was supposed to just stand there crying, but no, I had to screw up the whole thing!

The point is. I don't know why I get this happy, but I do. I do!"

I reread this email about 15 minutes before a girl I met 2 days ago got struck by lightning about 500 meters from where I was standing. The whole situation is...it's just terrible. I'm finally getting a good concept of what death means for me.

I feel like I've been asleep up until this point. I understand why adults and children are not interested in the same things. More and more concepts like this will be formed in my head, and I will change the way I think, feel, and act. It's not a good thing, I don't think.

I'm really going to die.

And, I'm finally getting a good concept of what life is going to mean for me.

I'm really not that smart. I sometimes have some useful insight into a good way to write a program, but most of the time I have a terrible time doing assignments because I spend so much time on them because I'm not very smart and can't do them very quickly. When I have 5 a week, one per day, and studying on the weekend, there is no time left. How does that work, exactly? How does anyone do anything here?

I can't do this for much longer. I'm going to have to spend Thanksgiving doing work, nothing else. I can't manage those breaks anymore.

This is garbage.

>>21 I've started really looking at the Content Problem now.

I will never see everything there is to see, but more importantly and scary is that I will never meet everyone I can meet. I don't have enough time to find the 'right' person. I'll likely find someone who's 'pretty good', but that I still have some kind of problem with. I'll never find that person I've been looking for for some time.

I'm really going to die.

It's really distracting me, actually. I just can't stop thinking about how every second I spend is another closer to my death. I will never get that time back. How can anyone not be so freaked out by this? How do people function?

Well, I suppose I am functioning, but not to my full potential. Not even close.

I hope this stops soon.

Sidenote: these posts copy fairly well into Microsoft Word 2010. (hint)

I am doing better now. I played Smash for a while and was wrecking, if onyl for a little bit.

Me, Steve, and Whale are the best of the house. I can beat both of them if I counterpick my character, though I can't really consistently with Mewtwo. I don't really know right now, things are weird.

I think I'm going to fall behind again if I don't start stuff right now.

Goddammit, everyone is so good looking.
:-(

I'm really going to die.

What's it going to be like? There's no way to even simulate it. All the concepts of perception and 'seeing' are completely gone. I keep thinking about it, and I can't imagine how people can actually go their lives believing they'll go somewhere when they die, that they won't just stop. I used to think they were fools for believing that, but now that I've really come to terms with this, I realize I am the fool for not. I will now live my life in anguish, fearing the day I die, alongside the 'fools' who will live a happy life and die in peace.

The best I can hope for is some mad time dilation in the minutes before I die. But, this isn't really realistic, either, because the brain could stop working in one instant. It doesn't even have to take time. It could be possible that you could live an infinite time even in that one frame, but humans aren't that good. Maybe you actually do get something if you die 'naturally', and have a bit of time before your brain finally stops zapping itself.

I'll think about it some more, but I don't think there's actually a solution like I thought. It's going to be like before I was born. Sad thing, in all my models, entropy was always the eternal disproof of everything I came up with. You can't even live forever, entropy makes sure of it. Death is certain, no matter what. Eventually, the Universe will run out of energy or collapse into a black hole, and in neither of those cases will a bunch of cells survive.

It's true, you really can't unring that bell. I understand now the difference between adults and children, and the way they view the world. I understand why no one conserves energy, why no one cares enough to boycott, all of it. They're going to die and they know it. They're afraid they'll waste their life for nothing, and they know that's the only thing they have.

I wish I never, ever thought of this. I wish I didn't get reminded of it every day, every hour, practically every 20 minutes. I wish I never rang that bell.

:-/
All for today.

I think I have a crush on Lovely.

Math makes sense, but took me until 5:00am yet again.

This must stop...someday.

>>28 Add another to the list...Spam.

Why is this so out of control?

Garbage. The only good thing about this thread was you finally started understanding people, if only a little. Also the death thing, but as I am starting to realize, that actually never ends. You only learn to ignore it once you think about it enough and finally convince yourself you're edgy enough to get on with life.

Also, I can wreck everyone in my home town at Smash so git gud scrub. Waveshine in place until your fingers bleed.

RIP the other thread.
Was it Spammy? Barabi? Puck, maybe? Who knows...







Or was it me?